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What Yvonne Nelson Did To Me - Literature - Nairaland

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What Yvonne Nelson Did To Me by JimmyFalola(m): 5:31pm On Jul 15, 2013
Feb 15, the aftermath of not having a valentine the day before had finally sunk in. I got up quite early that morning as I set about, trying to get ready for the hustle and bustle of the new job. My job was meant to be a stroll in the park simply because a certain school of thought believes “If you do something you have passion for, your work becomes play” or so I heard. I seem to have passion for this marketing thing but the job is far from play. From getting the early cup of coffee for the boss[I’m the only one allowed to do that],meeting clientele on the other side of the city, arranging paper work and trying to convince people to buy your products. Aargh!!! This feels like HELL. The daily drive to work was less than 45 minutes but I walked into my office late on that day because of the beautiful lady I saw in the reception. She was in her mid 20’s,I guess, average heighted, very curvy with a sleek, smooth dark hair and a smile so captivating, I lost track of time. Her beauty had me at standstill with many absurd questions popping up in my head; I just kept on wishing she was the temporary secretary the boss had promised to hire while my permanent secretary was on a compulsory 9-month vacation. All the ecstasy soon came to abrupt end; she apparently was asking after the boss and from her eagerness, I adjudged she was one of the boss’ several girlfriends. Disappointment had set in but I wasn’t going let that deter me “I’m going to get her”, I mumbled in a discreet tone as I made my way into my office .In my office, I had planned all my pick-up lines and arranged them selectively in my head in hope to seeing her the next day. I didn’t see her the next day nor the next month or the one after, I later found out she was the boss’ daughter who based in America, a glimmer of hope had been rekindled when the boss informed me that she was going to be in Nigeria for a long time because he had made her the head of one of his many conglomerate. I met her 6 months later at a clothing store just a few blocks from my apartment. I formally introduced myself, we had a chit-chat and yeah, I quickly implemented all my pick-up lines but to no avail. She didn’t even give me her phone number or BB Pin; she was the first girl to resist my charm, which made me more attracted to her. I discovered that she was going through a bad breakup, this I learnt from the boss after having a few drinks with him on one of those Friday nights[you know what I mean *winks*].I obtained her phone number after ransacking the boss’ phone stumbled on her phone number while holding the boss’ phone. I remember calling her and after explaining the reason for the call, which was a supposed order from the boss to check on her. These words echoed through my ears “hey, if you want to be friends for your ulterior motives, you had better back down now because I’ve met guys like you and trust me, I’m gonna make you regret your existence if you try messing with me”. ‘Bossy and sexy, I thought. It took a while for me to convince her that my intentions were pure even though they were not. Her name was Claire. Over the months, our friendship waxed stronger like the ones you see in those fancy fairytale movies, but I always had the secret intention to wife her. On a bright but blistering Saturday afternoon, we went on a picnic together, there and then she introduced me to her close pal ‘YVONNE NELSON’, yeah, the real ‘YVONNE NELSON’. I bet you could imagine the hysteria that followed after I was introduced to Yvonne. You think Yvonne is beautiful in all those magazines & pictures you’ve seen her in, right? Wait till u see her in person. Her beauty made me shiver and I began to say irrelevant things, I guess she noticed it because she always put on that enigmatic smile of hers anytime I started with of one my jabberings. The three of us grewto be best of friends but I couldn’t bear the agony any longer. I needed to tell Claire how I felt about her ,her father once said “If you ever make my daughter sad, I would ensure rot in jail and that your career never resuscitates after that”, that had always been the blockade anytime I tried expressing my feelings to Claire but I had summoned the manly courage to express myself. I called her over to my apartment, we had a few drinks [non-alcoholic] and I told her the way I felt about her. To my chagrin, she just cried and left without uttering a word. She later called at an ungodly hour, she told me Yvonne had called her earlier that day and told her that she was in love with me. I was confused, because here was an opportunity to date a celebrity [something I had craved all my life] or date the girl of my dreams. The words of Claire’s fathers, my boss echoed in my ear as I tried to make a decision. I picked up my phone the next day, dialed her number, we both talked about our feelings. I asked her out, she said yes and choose these next week Friday as date night. I drove to her house to pick her up; her father welcomed me and commended me on my brave decision knowing fully well that marriage was certainly the next thing. I treated her to a lavish dinner at my house [she is a top actress so I couldn’t take her out because of paparazzi].At the end of the date, I walked her to the garage and handed her the keys to my car [as a real gentleman would do].As I leaned in to kiss her shiny yet enticing pink lips, my course mate woke me up, announcing in a way that was rather too loud for my liking that the lecture had just ended. I arose and wriggled my way out of the usually overcrowded lecture hall. Just outside the lecture hall, I looked straight ahead and I SAW CLAIRE. I couldn’t believe my eyes. It seemed as if she was waving at me to come over but now when I recount the incident vividly, I realize she was just trying to flag down a cab. Before I could cross over to the other end of the narrow road, she had flagged down a cab, winked at me and in a millisecond; the cab had zoomed off with the girl of my dreams, gone. I haven’t seen or dreamt of her since then but I can recount the incident as vivid as the day I wrote my university entrance exam. This incident got me thinking if this was just a coincidence or just a result of my poor judgment that cost me the girl of my dreams. Crazy belief,huh? But if you had witnessed what I had witnessed you certainly would have believed anything. *PURELY FICTIONAL*

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