Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,154,278 members, 7,822,366 topics. Date: Thursday, 09 May 2024 at 10:34 AM

Nuts - Jokes Etc - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Nuts (1145 Views)

Photo Of The Day: All Nuts Explained In One Photo... / Pictures Of Tonto Dike Completely N A K E D(this Girl Has Finally Gone Nuts!) / Nuts (2) (3) (4)

(1) (Reply) (Go Down)

Nuts by candyA(f): 3:43am On Jun 01, 2006
On the outskirts of a small town,there was a big, old pecan tree just inside the cemetery fence.One day,two boys filled up a bucketful of nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began dividing the nuts.
"One for you, one for me.One for you,one for me," said one boy.Several dropped and rolled down toward the fence. Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle.As he passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery.He slowed down to investigate.Sure enough, he heard, "One for you, one for me.One for you,one for me." He just knew what it was. "Oh my", he shuddered; it's Satan and the Lord dividing the souls at the cemetery. He jumped back on his bike and rode off. Just around the bend he met an old man with a cane, hobbling along."Come here quick," said the boy,"you won't believe what I heard! Satan and the Lord are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls." The man said, "Beat it kid, can't you see it's hard for me to walk." When the boy insisted though, the man hobbled to the cemetery. Standing by the fence they heard, "One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me."
The old man whispered, "Boy, you've been tellin' the truth. Let's see if we can see the Lord himself."Shaking with fear, they peered through the fence, yet were still unable to see anything.The old man and the boy gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of the Lord. At last they heard, "One for you, one for me." And one last "One for you, one for me. That's all. Now let's go get those nuts by the fence, and we'll be done." They say the old man made it back to town a full 5 minutes ahead of the boy on the bike.
Re: Nuts by oxsam88(m): 10:10am On Jun 01, 2006
hahaha, lol, old papa wey no get leg pick race, he no wan die
Re: Nuts by micklplus(m): 10:21am On Jun 01, 2006
Nice one ! it made me laugh so loud the first time i came across this ! mango was used in place of nut and a gateman in place of the boy then a pastor in place of the old man.
Very funny joke you'll agree with me. cheesy
Nice one
Cheers cheesy
Re: Nuts by Nobody: 10:03am On Jun 01, 2016
Fast old man no wan go heaven

(1) (Reply)

Happy New Year / Why Am I So Unfortunate, Mugu No Wan Pay / Men Statement And Their True Meaning

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 9
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.