Growing up as a child/early teen I was a very dirty person but today I'm a neat freak...-i sat down today wondering what changed me but I could not just get it.....my friends and family say in obssessed about a neat place....

The Problem....

My brother is a very dirty person (I'm sorry to say this) but I'm fed up with it all...I can't begin to state the "instances" but he practically lives in filth, I feel bad and I want to help him but I don't know how..

He is my elder bro and I've tried to talk to him but I can't....I'm fed up with the situation...


I feel bad for him and I would like to get suggestions on what to do.

You can ask reasonable questions...

U can help him duffle.
Since the two of u r living in d same house, help him do his laundry.
Naw wait a minute, u can pack them and throw into d washing machine, tell him to pack them out after washing.
I used to charge my bro for every clothe I wash for him. Jean is the costliest. Extend it to his room.
He has a galfriend? Talk to her. She can help do the magic.
Remember u were once like that. Don't nag or scold him but pls help as much as u can.
Maybe u can throw more light into it.

Is he married

If not can you get him to arrange for a help(come n go) who will take care of the house n does laundry.. he pays of course

yellowpawpaw: U can help him duffle.
Since the two of u r living in d same house, help him do his laundry.
Naw wait a minute, u can pack them and throw into d washing machine, tell him to pack them out after washing.
I used to charge my bro for every clothe I wash for him. Jean is the costliest. Extend it to his room.
He has a galfriend? Talk to her. She can help do the magic.
Remember u were once like that. Don't nag or scold him but pls help as much as u can.
Maybe u can throw more light into it.

We don't have a washing machine, I tried charging him for his clothes but we got into a fight and he told me to stop washing them...

I've got my Dad to take care off and he is my elder bro by so manyy years, it hurts me to see a grown man living like this...

I don't know his girlfriend...

pickabeau1: Is he married

If not can you get him to arrange for a help(come n go) who will take care of the house n does laundry.. he pays of course

He still lives with us....

This issue has been going on for sso many years...I told my Dad to send him out, I've gone on house chores strike, right now I have my bath outside because I'm scared of toillet infection....

I read a thread on nairaland before about a woman complaining about how dirtyy her husband is, just imagine that her husband is my brother...

Ii care about him a lot and I don't know what else to do...

I don't inviite my friends over anymore, becaause even if my room is vey clean, what about the other place..

I can't do housse chores 24/7 because I've got school, lessonss and I also work part-time..

If I cllean up the house in the morning by 11am it will turn back to a dump....- don't know what else to do...

Now we r getting somewhere. He works I think? Tell him to bring money for washing machine. It seems u r already mad. Don't be.
As per telling ur dad to walk him out,no no no no, u hv no right at all.
U can't get to him by being mad. U hv been mad at him, go and apologise pls.
U hv to be psychological in ur approach.
And remember, he is ur elder.
Gentle pls.
I don't condone his behaivour but we want him to change, right?
If he don't want to bring money for washing machine,he can at least pay for a dry cleaning service.
As per d house, u can hire a cleaner and charge him for that.

Where does he work or is he self employed?
Is it that he doesn't clean up himself(wash his clothes,plates etc) or he does it clumsily(he can't wash his clothes well,has BO and don't care). Eitherways, I think you should have your dad talk to him and let him know that from henceforth :
Everyone cleans up (toilet,kitchen,bathroom) after him/her self,if he fails he gets himself another bathroom,kitchen.
Stop washing his clothes.
Everyone gets his or her own set of dishes,say 2 bowls,a fork,cup,spoon. Lock up the rest. If he can't keep his own clean,no food for him.

If it doesn't work then you guys might just have to continue managing him or one of you move out for the other.

I believe bfore u can help him.. U av to b his friend... His very gud one.. As in u gat to bond with him... Accept and luv him for who he is den when u feel he is relaxed enof around u den u start to do d changing..

Let m giv u an example...

Am very bad wit color combination in d general sense of fashion but i gat sis who r... I dont usually listen to them b4.. i dont know how its started but nau we relate very well dat sumtims dai force m to change ma cloths up to 3 times sumtimes in order to make sure i go out looking gud enof for dem. M sure d reason is cos we gat dis bond dai comfortable around and viceversa.. If u going to help i tink u av b bond with him.. Dat way he woundnt c it as disrespect..

yellowpawpaw: Now we r getting somewhere. He works I think? Tell him to bring money for washing machine. It seems u r already mad. Don't be.
As per telling ur dad to walk him out,no no no no, u hv no right at all.
U can't get to him by being mad. U hv been mad at him, go and apologise pls.
U hv to be psychological in ur approach.
And remember, he is ur elder.
Gentle pls.
I don't condone his behaivour but we want him to change, right?
If he don't want to bring money for washing machine,he can at least pay for a dry cleaning service.
As per d house, u can hire a cleaner and charge him for that.

This issue has been going on for years.....it's not an issue for today...he works and trust me he won't bring out the money for the washing machine.....he sees notthing wrong in his hygiene and that's the issue....

I clean the house as much as I can and I lock myself up in my room....

It's just that it's embarassing when you see that yyour brrotherr is developing B/O or when you see him living in dirt..

Ii think my Dad has accepted him like that but I can't.....he talks about it beffore but now he just ignores.....


He is older than me by 10yrs....

Hmmmm .. has he considered getting someone coming in twice or thrice weekly to clean the house

rap him as per junior sis.. this may work

alternatively u endure and move out the first chance you get

let your folks know though

duffie:

He still lives with us....

This issue has been going on for sso many years...I told my Dad to send him out, I've gone on house chores strike, right now I have my bath outside because I'm scared of toillet infection....

I read a thread on nairaland before about a woman complaining about how dirtyy her husband is, just imagine that her husband is my brother...

Ii care about him a lot and I don't know what else to do...

temi4fash: I believe bfore u can help him.. U av to b his friend... His very gud one.. As in u gat to bond with him... Accept and luv him for who he is den when u feel he is relaxed enof around u den u start to do d changing..

Let m giv u an example...

Am very bad wit color combination in d general sense of fashion but i gat sis who r... I dont usually listen to them b4.. i dont know how its started but nau we relate very well dat sumtims dai force m to change ma cloths up to 3 times sumtimes in order to make sure i go out looking gud enof for dem. M sure d reason is cos we gat dis bond dai comfortable around and viceversa.. If u going to help i tink u av b bond with him.. Dat way he woundnt c it as disrespect..

Okay...but he is older than me with 10years

Thank you all for your responses...I know I'll move out someday but I care about him...I really want him to change because even if I move out someday, he will still be like this...




I want him to change, that's why ii've been thinking about what made me change throughout today...

Again people fail to understand the mind of a dirty person.
A DIRTY Person is COMFORTABLE with DIRT, clean up a million times they will mess it up a million times, you CANT CHANGE them, you are either constantly cleaning or you find a way to ignore the dirt they create, only a dirty person can decide to change.

Poster it is not your responsibility to "Change" him, your parents must be fed up and tired of trying, don't carry such a burden on your small shoulders.

Clean up what you can and pour his dirty clothes for him in his own space.
Why are people looking for a girlfriend to turn into a magician for?

He is dirty, he loves to stay in dirt and make more dirt, anyone who will live with him has to get use to that fact.

The only thing that will change your brother is when you get a someone dirtier than him in that house, watch him cleaning up after the person. Just pray the love of his life is dirtier, then he will change.

He doesn't care now because you are there to clean up after him.