'Style Is An Alien Word To Uche
Jombo, Toke Makinwa Has Too
Much Fakeness - Emmy Collins
Check out what avant-garde and
versatile designer Emmy Collins who is
rapidly gaining a reputation for mocking
celebrities' red carpet outfits wrote on
his blog about Uche Jombo's oufit to
Rukky Sanda's movie premiere and
Toke Makinwa.
This man is mean! What do you think?
Uche Jumbo
I guess the fashion police just arrested
this lady outside the event venue and
rummaged through that hair hoping to
find any atom of style hidden there.
They must have let her go when they
saw a brick wall.
The fashion olokpas must have felt so
out of luck, hehe.
Style is an alien word to this chic.
However,I have been wowed by the most
unlikely people at some
point in my life so I am still waiting with
bated breath for Uche to shut me up
with her styling someday.
I wouldn`t put any smart money on that
happening any time soon though.
Toke Makinwa
The first time Toke found herself in hot
pepper soup on this forum was during
her obvious failed attempt at stuffing
this monstrosity called a dress down our
throats.
However,she is back in trouble today not
as a result of the outfit she had on but
what she spewed out of her mouth in a
recent interview.
I have managed to purposefully boycott
any news relating to Toke of late as I
honestly don`t fathom why she has to be
in the news.
Well, I have mentioned unequivocally in
the past that once you set out to bleach
the beautifully skin you inherited from
God (God created us in his own image)
then you have proven beyond any
reasonable doubt that you are insecure
so Toke has since entered my black
book as an insecure young lady.
By saying that she acquired the British/
American accent during the JUST one
year she spent in UK because she didn`t
want to come across as a “SAVAGE” is
further proof that this young lady needs
counselling to build up her sense of self
belief.
Let me tell you a short story.
Back in the 90`s , there used to be an
American military base in the Dutch
town of Zest located on the outskirts of
Utrecht and near the town of Gouda.
If you are a lover of cheese, then you
must have heard of Gouda as Gouda
cheese is amongst the best in the world;
stinkingly yummy, lol..
Anyway, there was a nightclub called
Pinocchio which was frequented by
Black Americans from the base and of
course Africans most especially
Nigerians (Naija no dey carry last nah).
Now, the major attraction to this club is
the chics, YUP, chics. Any white chic
who wanted to taste what a brother had,
partied out there.
The prevailing accent then was
American so every Nigerian including
those with tribal marks and those
straight out of main market Onitsha
made efforts to sound American and
boy, the most disgusting sound I ever
listened to in my life was to listen to
these confused Nigerians trying to speak
with an American accent just to get the
chics.
Me?
I used my fine boyness, my nasty but
beautiful afro mixed with my authentic
accent (whatever that means lol ) to
score a few nice chics.
In fact I scored more chics than all the
fake asses. And oh, did I forget to
mention that even a few Somalians who
just came straight off the boat and
miswaka-ed into the club also tried to
come off as Americans?
Now, imagine the scene. A local
Somalian faking American and
genuinely thinking he pulled it off? I
used to have an American buddy from
the base and one day he said to me “why
are my Nigerian brothers not proud of
their accent. I hang with you because
you keep it real,bro”
Well, the moral of my short story is that
fake accent doesn`t get you too far.
People will always smell your fakeness
from miles away.
Savage my skinny ass. Fake accent, fake
skin colour? Now, that is too much
fakeness in one person,Tokstarr.