When i decided to worship at Chris
Okotie’s Household of God on
(29/12.2013),i knew i was going to have a
lifetime experience. I have heard so
much about him and his exploit that i was
so eager to visit his sanctuary yesterday.
For those of you who do not know,
Household of God is situated along
Oregun road Ikeja Lagos.
Chris Okotie owns all the land and
buildings on that street .His Church shares
the same fence with Chris Oyakhilome’s
Christ Embassy Headquarters.
Arriving Church was easy.. I made my
way into the Church after the normal
searching at the gate. The first thing that
will hit you, were the bouncers, whose
chest were as huge as bags of cement,
even the devil in his wisdom dare not
make a move near that Church at this
time.
The inside speaks of the taste of the man,
sparkling, well decorated to taste.
Parked outside was not his new Rolls
Royce but another Mercedes Benz
Limousine with customized plate number.
As it is customary, my seat must be
beside a fine babe. Kai, they were not in
short supply at Household. Infact this
Church has the highest concentration of
fine babes that i have ever seen in any
Church.
Chris Okotie must have selected them
himself. The organizers of Most Beautiful
Girl in Nigeria will envy what i saw
yesterday.
Chris Okotie can successfully organize ten
good pageants with what he has in that
Church.He even said ,they accuse him of
marrying fair babes.
See shape,tall,short,dark,fair,half caste
see catwalk, see stepping, see mini skirts,
see fine steps, see clean smooth skins.
See nails,i say come see cloth. Brazillian
hair,no be that type wey all those Lagos
babes dey do under Ikeja bridge.
It was like a competition.
Abeg if you no get designer clothe ,shoes,
bags etc no come Household, because,
dem go think say you be steward or
waitress.
After taking my seat, beside my lovely
damsel,i quickly adjusted my lens and
snap some pictures while people were
settling down.
Within minutes,a very huge guy that will
make Hulk Horgan look like a baby
wrestler walked up to me asking me to
follow him.
My heart sank,wetin i do now..who i
offend,who send me make i come Chris
Okotie’s Church..Na today i go see wetin
my eyes dey find.
I asked my latest catch to kindly look
after my seat while I followed the guy
outside
On getting there,i was shocked by what
the Chief bouncer said..”we know you.
We ve monitored you since you entered
this Church. We don’t allow any camera
work or taking of pictures in this Church
or premises.. Please let me see the
pictures you just snapped ,because our
CCTV camera caught you taking
pictures”..Who wan argue with this kin
person..i opened my folder and showed
him the singular picture on the folder..He
asked me to delete it..which i did..His
next words,”As i said,we like your job and
what you are doing, just relax and have a
nice service with us at Household, God
bless,you can go back in but no more
pictures please”
I was relieved, from that moment, i just
respected Chris Okotie and his security
agents, these guys were not being paid
for nothing.
On resuming my seat,my concentration
now focused on the Service of songs
which was being led by a lady..it lasted
for close to an hour before the man of
the moment finally came in, ushered in
and surrounded by six huge bouncers,the
type that will make Goodluck jonathan’s
guys look like kindergatens.
He made straight for the pulpit.Three of
the bouncers took their positions in front
of the alter, just like you saw in those
pictures that was in circulation last week.
Okotie looks more like a pop star than a
pastor.He has not changed one bit from
what i saw of him about ten years
ago..His jerry curled hair was shinning.He
wore a golden colour Jacket with black
patches over a black trouser. You will
mistake him for one of those Hollywood
actors.
Immediately he picked the mic,he went
into solo songs..Okotie does not have a
choir or back up singers. He is the
Choir,Choir master and chorister all put in
one.His is the only Church i have visited
that does not have a choir.
He was moving from one song to another,
for over one hour he didn’t stop.
I was forced to ask the babe beside me,if
it was a service or Song festival. She didnt
even bother to answer me, all she was
saying was give it to me,give it to me
Pastor,i can feel it ,give it to me as she
sang along..Haaa,give it to you.give you
what i asked..
She took a long look at me and continued
in her frenzy,i say give it to me my
pastor.Oti o.
This is another level,since i didnt want to
be left behind,as Okotie was singing i
joined her in saying,Give it to us,give it to
us pastor,give it to us oooooo.biko give
us,give her,give me too lalalalalala.
The lady suddenly stopped and pinched
my hand .Keep quiet,you are not singing
like someone that is in the spirit she told
me.I asked her what she meant,after all i
just wanted pastor Kris to give it to us
and you are asking me to keep quiet.
Please give it to you us,infact kill us
Pastor i continued
By now she had kept quiet and was
watching me.
The whole church was in a
frenzy,estatic ,singing and dancing.all
dance steps were on display,skelewu
,konkon below,kukere,name it,even apala
dance join.ewooooo
Some were jumping up and down like
people possessed by spirit. Some were
even running from one end of the
auditorium to another.
The beautiful ones that occupied all the
front rows,stood up and were dancing
close to the alter,as if to say Man Of
God,we are still available o.
But Kris Okotie must have been used to it
because, he no even look their side. He
was singing in languages that i never
understood.
I even saw a popular actress among them
After over an hour of singing,Okotie now
prayed for two nations,Nigeria and Israel
(why Isreal,i don’t know) but i heard
those were the two countries he prays
for weekly.
After the prayer which lasted for about
five minutes, he entered gear two,he
kpet on sining,singing,singing and sing.
Haba,which kain Church be this nah,no
wonder all these people are trooping
here,they came to see Okotie perform
every week, definitely not his preaching.
After he must have satisfied himself, he
now settle down to speak on the birth of
Jesus Chris and the three wisemen that
came to visit Joseph and Mary.
It’s was easier to understand Patrick
Obhiagbon and Wole Soyinka than
listening to kris..At a point i i asked the
babe beside me what Kris just said,she
said she didnt know,i then asked
how,how come you were shouting Praise
the Lord.
She told me that i just have to accept
what he is saying with open minds
without questioning.na him i tell am say
ok,i hear.
The average age at the Church was 40
years.
Kris Okotie has die-hard converts who
from all indications are ready to do
anything for him. he is to them,a role
model of a sort.
The babes are well polished. Not the type
you see at most of these orthodox
churches.
Okotie went on to say, Love without
Money is not complete.
According to him, shower a woman with
money and see how she ll cherish you for
life.To him,love is not enough.it must be
backed with money and big time gifts.
According to him,that is why he buys the
latest expensive cards.
When i asked the babe beside me who
don dey already squeeze my hand
whether she believe that, she said
ofcourse,i can’t go out with a guy that
cannot take care of my needs. Who is not
ready to change my car every other year
With that i kuku gradually remove my
hand, before the girl go collect my car key
and i come take leg waka go house.
She asked me if anything was wrong i told
her no, that i was just feeling dizzy and
would need some fresh air outside.
To add to my stress, Chris Okotie now
shared free birthday cakes for people
born in different months of 2014 (yap
2014).
He only shared it among ladies; no single
guy was allowed to pick a cake.
He also conducted quiz among us, he only
allowed women to answer the quiz and
each of them were given cakes and gifts.
Of the over 20 gifts Chris Okotie gave
away today,no single man or guy was
given any.
He said his gifts were ONLY for women.
At that point, i knew i have over stayed
my welcome. I told the babe that i
wanted to go and take some fresh air
outside; from there i disappeared and
drove off.
It’s obvious that Chris Okotie and his
babes still have a lot in common.
If you need fine babes,go to
Household..If you need superlative
Music, Chris Okotie will give you several
doses, but if you need serious preaching, i
doubt if Pastor Chris Okotie will be my
first Church,maybe because of the big big
grammar and effizy.

DonLucky_Osas

Honestly. I enjoyed reading this.

Used to drive through his church when I worked at Oregun. Very beautiful environment and clean.

O boy!the only things missing in your narration are hennesy n Heineken!

Aghhhhh.....





Lobatan

Hahahahahaha....

I must confess i Love this piece. Keep it up.

Next time snap in the secret...lol

Op, good work....hope u were not carried away by outlooks of those beautiful babes?
* SIGN OF END TIMES *

Very good write-up.. I really enjoyed it