Unmh...this days i have begin to wake up into reality that i cant change myself, i cant stop this habit that i have involve myself into for the past decade and still wallowing in it, i have tried everything i could but its just like a torn in the flesh like apostle paul put it but this one has refuses to go. I have prayed,fasted concerning this yet it keeps getting stronger. As a christian i learnt that you have to do away with sin, you have to get rid of every bad habit before you can be counted worthy to make it into heaven, now, what of the habits that have turn into addiction and refuses to go?....for christ sake i am a lover of God,i go to church,read my bibles, join the workforce, pay my tithes and offering, but i am not perfect, of cos i cant be cause the addiction of my flesh is killing me, its like the overdose of chloroquine that i took many years ago when i was ill and am still feeling the side effect till tomorow, and this stories of heaven and hell that i am hearing gets me more scared, i actually dont wants to believe it but they seems to be true in various ways, the bible speaks of hell, the book of revelation pictures dooms and destruction in the last days, and i keep wondering how a soul like mine will make it to heaven considering the age and the century we currently are now...since we are not to be found with a single sin to make heaven why then are we born into an atmosphere filled with sins, why then is our body configured to operate in it, why then is our mind configured to think on it thereby fashioning out works of iniquities. for what purpose and to what reason should a soul be denied of eternal rest and confine to eternal damnation due to what he can not change. Its true that Jesus came to die and we keep on pleading his blood to cleanse us from our sins but like how many times are we goin to that, wont He even get tired of us...? If hell is made for the devil and his rebellious angels why then does it have to be a torment place for the lost soul of men, are men fashion in the same body,mind,and soul quality like that of the angels, are the body of angels made in frailty like that of the men? why then do men face such gruesome judgement..why, why,whyyyyyyyy?, i have tried to attain holiness but i keep failing, i dont wish to fail but i cant just help it, oh where am i heading to? That my service to God may not be in vain, that my works may not be in utter ruin, that i may not be a cast away,oh God help me. Lots of people like me are out there but i dont know whether they think upon it, well i do and i really do cos i know that if the trumpet sounds now am not certain of going,thou i wish to and i am trying to, but am just failing...well, maybe i should just do my best, pray and hope that i will be found worthy when that day comes, or moreso also prepared for the worst that may come, afterall am not going to be alone, althou it might be gruesome and painful but deep down in me i will know that i did my best for God.

Oh! Dear... I can relate.

But we strive for perfection...
Let go of your works and let God...

Let Christ live his life tru U... Focus on Jesus and not on what u're struggling with..

Thats what i'm doin this year... We've got to set aside every besetting sin through the enabling powe rof the holy ghost...

We can be perfect because our heavenly father is...

And wen we make it to heaven, it won't be because we wia self disciplined...

It will be because we held on to the finished works of christ on the cross and Grace(Christ) sopke for US...

Meanwhile chew on this romans 12;1-2....using d message bible...''12; 1-2 So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you''

@izyluv, i wont fail to appreciate ur words of encouragement. The tides are high, the wave is much and the storm is reckless rocking against the boat of the righteous to sink.....may the Lord help calm the sea before it swallows.