Not too long

[This is a joke that is really funny and it works!]
An old lady walked into a Grocery Store.
She wanted to buy the best dog food in the world for her little puppy.
She went up to the cash register to buy the food.
The sales-lady told her that the store did not allow old ladies to buy
animal food unless they show the actual animal because a lot of old ladies
like to eat the animal food themselves.
So the old lady went home, got her dog and went back to the store to buy
her dog food.
The next day she came back to buy the best cat food around But the
Saleslady told her the same thing, so the old lady went back home and
brought her cat to the Grocery Store to buy the cat food.
The next day the old lady went to the Grocery Store again carrying a big
container. She went up to the sales lady and said, "Put your hand inside
here". The Saleslady shook her head. "NO", she said, "there is probably
something in there that will bite me!" "I promise you that there is nothing
in here that will bite you". the old lady said. So the Saleslady stuck her
hand inside the container and screamed.
To find out what was inside the container you must send this to at least 10
people, when it says, your mail has been sent...instead of clicking OK, hit
ALT-8 and the container will pop up on your screen.

Well...nice joke...

Love. All my life i have read about it, dreamt of it,
waited for it, cried for it, and needed it. Now with
you, i have found it. Love you my angel.

miss/missed ya so badly

Is it true that LOVE is irresistable desire to be irresistably desired. Cos thats how I feel about you.

Thanks.

Children playing outside cars can cause accident.But adults playing inside cars can cause children by accident.

It's important to find a man who has money, a man who adores you,a man who is great in the sack. It's also imprtant that these 3 men should never meet!

I've been arrested for bein the ugliest person in Britain, can u cum down the police station and show them it's a mistake?

Clouds r white but the sky is blue,monkey like u should b kept in the zoo, dont get angry ull find me there too,not in the cage but laughing at u. ha! ha! ha

A man can kiss his wife goodbye. A flower can kiss a butterfly.Wine can kiss a frosted glass.But u my friend can kiss my ass!

i tried to call you from a payphone last night. i put my doner card in by mistake, it cost me an arm and a leg!

Hi i am dying to c u, i want to talk to u seriously, but I cant get 2 u, dis stupid gatekeeper is asking me 4 a ticket to enter the zoo!

Hey can u do me a favour, take a pic of urself n send me it, i'm playin cards n i'm missin the joker!!

Hey friend remember dat without stupidity there can be no wisdom & without ugliness there can be no beauty… so the world needs YOU after all!

Jesus says to John come forth ill give you eternal life. John came fifth he won a toaster

A girl phoned me the other day and said..."Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home

At dis moment in time 10 million people r having sex.5 million people r drinking coffee.100 million people r sleeping & 1 stupid fool is reading my text!pass on

The rain makes all things beautiful.The grass & flowers 2. If rain makes all things beautiful why doesn’t it rain on you?

i want u 2 know dat our friendship means alot 2 me.U cry i cry.U lauf i lauf.U jump out of da window... I look down & den... i lauf again

love sms > roses

Roses r blue, Violets r red, Im crap with colours, but wicked in bed.

roses r red, poppys r 2, but ill do anything 2 b with you

Roses r red Voilets r blue 2 hell wiv da colors I really luvs u

Roses r red, sky lights r blue! Love is a drug and i'm addicted 2 u

roses are red voilet are blue, someone like you, belongs in a zoo, dont be mad dont be blue, frankenstein was ugly to

If Roses were Black and violets were brown, my love for you would never b found but roses r red and violets are blue, all i want to say is I LOVE U!

Roses r red, Violets r blue, God made me pretty, but wat happend 2 u!

roses are red, violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one
doesnt!!!

roses are red, violets are blue, a kippers a fish, dat smell like you, lets not despair,lets live in hope,dat one day ull discover soap

Red r red, violets r blue l luv chocolate more than u!!

dreams

Ur only mine wen i dream.wen i wake i wanna scream.ur not mine im all alone.i can only text u on my fone.do dreams lie or r dey true-i hope so cos babes i want u!

If dreams werent dreams & dreams came true i woodnt b here id b wiv u.Distance is 1 thing dat keeps us apart.But ull always remain in my heart!

Y do we close our eyes wen we sleep- wen we dream, wen we kiss?dis is becoz the most precious thing in the world is unseen.Wen i close my eyes i c u!

Dream a dream 2nite as u sleep.smile a smile 2morrow that u may keep.may all of ur dreams and wishes come true cause i could`nt find a better friend like u!

love sms > what if?

if ur askin if id hurt u da ansa is nevaif ur askin if i luv u da ansa is 4eva.if ur askin if i want u da ansa is i do.if ur askin wot i value most da ansa is u

if i could die early i would ask God if i could be your guardian angel, so i could wrap my wings around you and embraces you whenever you feel alone...

if i die 2nite i go with no regrets if its in ur arms den i kno i was blessed but if ur eyes r the last thing i see den i know the beauty heaven holds for me

If luvs a disease den im very ill.but i dont want medicine i wont take no pill.i will suffer dis illness cos it makes me see exactly how much u mean 2 me!

If i were a tear in ur eye i wood roll down onto ur lips.But if u were a tear in my eye i wood never cry as i wood be afraid 2 lose u!

If Love & Friendship could be brought or sold as if they were Stocks & Shares.those wise enough to invest in you SEXY would all be millionaires!!!

If water was a kiss id send u the sea.if a hug was 1 leaf id send u a tree if luv were forever id send u eternity!

If i rote ur name in d sky wind wood blow it away.if i rote ur name in d sea waves wood wash it away.But ur name is engravd in my heart where nothin can touch it!

if u love me like u told me please be careful wiv my heart- u can take it jus dont break it or my world will fall appart

If a kiss was a raindrop i'd send u showers.if a hug was a second i'd send u hours.if a smile was water i'd send u a sea.if love was a person i'd send u me!

love sms > kiss

A peach is a peach.a plum is a plum.a kiss aint a kiss unless its wiv tongues.so open ur mouth & close ur eyes & give ur tongue some exercise

Kissing you baby is my dream.Im the strawberry & ur the cream.Handle me gently keep me real keen.U & i together babes is passion so extreme!

wot kisses mean!KISS ON HAND=i adore u KISS ON CHEEK=lets b friends KISS ON NECK=i want u KISS ON LIPS=i luv u KISS ANYWHERE ELSE=...lets not get carried away!

Kisses blown r kisses wasted.kisses rnt kisses unless they r tasted.kisses spread germs and germs r hated.but u can kiss me baby im vaccinated

looks like sum1s been on txt2nite... ay!!!

Posted by: brony
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looks like sum1s been on txt2nite... ay!!!

Also looks like someone has shown people txt2nite up there.

Be known for what you are and make your
actions sign posts that reveal this.
Flow like water round obsatcles.
Do not batter your head against the brick wall.
Flow under it and when it collapses, you will be long gone.
Act as if you were part of the pattern of the seasons, of the day and night.
Be natural, be in nature and allow nature to be in you.

_ ying and yang.

Do not go against the flow of life.
The joys of summer give way to the chill of winter.
But both are necessary.
Solidarity of earth enables you to reach up to heaven.
One without the other makes no sense.

If you are hard hard things will befall you.
If you are soft you can bend and survive.
If you compete the world will take you on.
If you are able to be content the world will roll on with you. __ ying and yang

So, follow the laws of nature and be HAPPY

Posted by: kaylala
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I will show all these to your VC mikebuddy.

Do you read at all?

Can you locate Okija?

Sex is like a maths test test.. me pluse u, substract d clothes, add d bed, divide d leg & multiply the organs. fancy a math test

@charlisco that was a good one but this is not the place for, there is a thread under sexuality called sex texts and jokes or something like that.

But, good one my guy, good one!

Kay good one there.

@babagana
well i will brows through there to see if i can find more of that

Some people settle for style, class and exquisite taste,
But I will only settle for you, because

You are the best style I can find
The highest class I can belong to
And the sweetest delicacy for my taste

I wouldn't settle for anything less but you
My Darling

Goto to www.mikebuddy.8k.com

I only have SEX on days that begin with T: Thanksgiving. Tuesday. Thursday. Today. Tomorrow. Thaturday. thunday.. Every thucking day!

Of all the babes ur my selection please dont giv me a rejection.my teeth are clean for ur Inspection so giv my mouth a tongue injection!

A girl who opens her hands recieves gifts.who opens her heart recives love.who opens her legs recieves happines

Love is when you take away the feeling,the passion and the romance in a relationship and to find out you still care for that person.

Giving someone your love is not an assurance that they will love you back.Dont expect love in return just wait for it to grow in their heart but if it doesnt ,be happy it grew in yours.