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Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth - Family - Nairaland

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Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by nickxtra(m): 9:24pm On Sep 02, 2014
My wife gave birth about 4 months ago, and now I can't bear the waiting anylonger to have intimacy with her, but she always kick against it anytime I demand for it, giving as excuses, the little tear she sustained when she was delivering and the fact that our baby is still too small. The day I could no longer bear it, I pestered and used everything within my 'persuasive skills' to get it, she reluctantly gave in and it was not a pleasant thing for her as she cried at every 'soft' or 'gentle' thrust. I love my wife, respect her womanhood and share in her pains and I don't want to go hurt her feelings. I need your sincere advice as am always urged to have intimacy with her, since I don't and I can't go outside to satisfy my urge. What do I do?
Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by samuelson06(m): 9:30pm On Sep 02, 2014
What you should do? Put am anoda belle nah. Abi wetin dey for your mind? No forget to suck some milk when next you go o grin

5 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by gistmelove(m): 9:32pm On Sep 02, 2014
Bros try to hold body now grin
but if you can't
.















Na ur property ooo u can penetrate anytym and anyday..

2 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by stanliwise(m): 9:36pm On Sep 02, 2014
gistmelove: Bros try to hold body now grin
but if you can't
.















Na ur property ooo u cant penetrate anytym and anyday..
You must be a mentally derailed person to call wife a property and it is people like you that makes wife just to become a sex object.

23 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by gistmelove(m): 9:45pm On Sep 02, 2014
stanliwise:
You must be a mentally derailed person to call wife a property and it is people like you that makes wife just to become a sex object.
ok wife na wetin?? After marriage??
Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by ayaomoade: 9:51pm On Sep 02, 2014
3 months is too long in my own opinion. Couples should resume a healthy sex life any time after 6 weeks of childbirth. Yes, women are different. But if at this stage, she's still feeling unbearable pain during sex, then she needs a medical check up.
Google sex after childbirth to be more knowledgeable and encourage your wife to do the same. Once she's medically certified okay, encourage her to relax during sex and use a lubricant to ease the friction.
She might also be scared of unplanned pregnancy. So, i suggest you decide on best family planning that will suit you two.

17 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by Tallesty1(m): 9:56pm On Sep 02, 2014
gistmelove: Bros try to hold body now grin
but if you can't
.















Na ur property ooo u cant penetrate anytym and anyday..
Wobbish!!!



And he is her property too so she can lock his tools and throw the key into a river.


@Op, try hold body and understand her. You wouldn't want to hurt your wife just to please yourself.? She will soon be ready for you.

4 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by Mutuwa(m): 9:58pm On Sep 02, 2014
like a month n some few days or a week is good enuf to resume.

1 Like

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by mkoabiola: 9:58pm On Sep 02, 2014
U tried oooo
4months
God knws I can't wait 4 so long

1 Like

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by stanliwise(m): 9:58pm On Sep 02, 2014
gistmelove:
ok wife na wetin?? After marriage??
Wife are to be your life partner and bible made it clear that a woman is specially created to help a man.
So a woman is let us just put it like
Man - president
Wife - vice president

And not
Man - preident.
Wife - civil servant.

When you say somebody is your property; It means the person is your slave according to how master called their slave back then.

Don't make a wife your sex slave.

8 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by Edykul(f): 10:02pm On Sep 02, 2014
She should see a doctor 4 medical checkup.

2 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by gistmelove(m): 10:03pm On Sep 02, 2014
stanliwise:
Wife are to be your life partner and bible made it clear that a woman is special created to help a man.
So a woman is let us just put it like
Man - president
Woman - vice president

And not
Man - preident.
Wife - civil servant.

When you say somebody is your property; It means the person is your slave according to how master called their slave back then.

No matter what u said.. My wife and my children are my properties becos am born to carter for dem... grin

1 Like

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by LaRoyalHighness(f): 10:07pm On Sep 02, 2014
Patience won't kill you Bro... Love making na fried rice? They are fun stuffs you guys can do together while waiting for wifey to come around. *childbirth ain't beans for some people... some are easy and some ain't.

Goodluck!

4 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by bigtt76(f): 10:08pm On Sep 02, 2014
Go buy soap or Vaseline and Google Maheeda online .....stop complaining grin!

5 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by nickxtra(m): 10:09pm On Sep 02, 2014
ayaomoade: 3 months is too long in my own opinion. Couples should resume a healthy sex life any time after 6 weeks of childbirth. Yes, women are different. But if at this stage, she's still feeling unbearable pain during sex, then she needs a medical check up.
Google sex after childbirth to be more knowledgeable and encourage your wife to do the same. Once she's been medically fit, encourage her to relax during sex and use a lubricant to ease the friction.
She might also be scared of unplanned pregnancy. So, i suggest you decide on best family planning that will suit you two.
Thank you for the advice. Yes, she actually have the fear being pregnant so soon as another reason. I will try your options
Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by stanliwise(m): 10:14pm On Sep 02, 2014
gistmelove:

No matter what u said.. My wife and my children are my properties becos am born to carter for dem... grin
Ponder them deeply. It is God's property and not yours, you are only meant to care for them and that is all.

2 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by thorpido(m): 10:50pm On Sep 02, 2014
Your wife should be fit for lovemaking at 3mths even if she had a tear.I guess she has some fears which is why she is rejecting.
Get someone to convince her(a doctor preferably)that all is well.
Get a lubricant to use and take it slow with the act.Also use a family planning method.

2 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by raumdeuter: 10:53pm On Sep 02, 2014
6-8 weeks na standard

4months after childbirth? Thats too long she should see a doctor

2 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by diphi(m): 12:02am On Sep 03, 2014
bigtt76: Go buy soap or Vaseline and Google Maheeda online .....stop complaining grin!
smiley
bigtt76: Go buy soap or Vaseline and Google Maheeda online .....stop complaining grin!
bad gal......
Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by snazzylove: 12:12am On Sep 03, 2014
Wife should go 4 medical check up if she's still having pains at 4months. Don't tink its normal.

6-8 weeks standard?

Dat means am really exceptional cheesy

At my six weeks check up the docs normally run a PT on me based on d info I supplied grin grin grin

2 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by soulglo: 2:18am On Sep 03, 2014
All she needs is 6 weeks. If she's crying after 4 months them she needs to see a doctor. It seems you guys do not communicate well because I don't see what the baby being small has to do with screwing your wife

2 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by Nobody: 7:14am On Sep 03, 2014
Sometimes people Amaze me, so with all the education and enlightenment paid for on radio for child spacing some people will still refuse to have a healthy se-x life because of the fear of conception?

Immediately after birth or weeks later ask to for family planning options and get one which fits you.

As for the tear has it healed? When we advice men to come along for hospital visits its so you can know these things and how to support. Go with her to a Doctor and sort it out even for a major tear 3 months is enough to heal

3 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by Nobody: 7:29am On Sep 03, 2014
bigtt76: Go buy soap or Vaseline and Google Maheeda online .....stop complaining grin!
grin grin grin
Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by Dygeasy(m): 7:33am On Sep 03, 2014
LaRoyalHighness: Patience won't kill you Bro... Love making na fried rice? They are fun stuffs you guys can do together while waiting for wifey to come around. *childbirth ain't beans for some people... some are easy and some ain't.

Goodluck!
As you talk that fried rice na hin that food dey hungry me. grin
Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by Nobody: 7:49am On Sep 03, 2014
Awwww embarassed
Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by nickxtra(m): 8:54am On Sep 03, 2014
thorpido: Your wife should be fit for lovemaking at 3mths even if she had a tear.I guess she has some fears which is why she is rejecting.
Get someone to convince her(a doctor preferably)that all is well.
Get a lubricant to use and take it slow with the act.Also use a family planning method.
I will, thanks
Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by nickxtra(m): 8:59am On Sep 03, 2014
bigtt76: Go buy soap or Vaseline and Google Maheeda online .....stop complaining grin!
I understand your insinuation, but I just can't do that. Its against my principles

1 Like

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by gen2briz(m): 9:08am On Sep 03, 2014
Just try and reason with her ,and wen reasoning with her,also consider her also.... Am still begging God for that your spirit ooo. If you can wait that long, I beg add at least two more months by then she her self go know say you don try.

1 Like

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by Nobody: 5:04pm On Sep 03, 2014
haba oga, you wicked oh lipsrsealed
you should respect her wishes and keep off na
do you think it's easy to have something the size of a watermelon forced through something the size of an orange
she may still be in pains, and you ought to show her full support ooh
I know it aint easy to contain your urge, but please, bear with her for the time being, until she feels strong enough to get intimate with you
nickxtra: My wife gave birth about 4 months ago, and now I can't bear the waiting anylonger to have intimacy with her, but she always kick against it anytime I demand for it, giving as excuses, the little tear she sustained when she was delivering and the fact that our baby is still too small. The day I could no longer bear it, I pestered and used everything within my 'persuasive skills' to get it, she reluctantly gave in and it was not a pleasant thing for her as she cried at every 'soft' or 'gentle' thrust. I love my wife, respect her womanhood and share in her pains and I don't want to go hurt her feelings. I need your sincere advice as am always urged to have intimacy with her, since I don't and I can't go outside to satisfy my urge. What do I do?

1 Like

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by Nobody: 5:22pm On Sep 03, 2014
..I totally understand how the op is feeling...I also understand that the wife has gone through tears during child-birth....I heard that stitching of the womanliness due to tears usually make the passage narrower....
...I believe the op needs to exercise alittle patience for his wife...if you know your patience has ben exhausted, you guys can try prolonging the fore-play whenever you guys have sex....It will make her get wet more...or better still use some lubricators....jez saying...I think it will make it easier.....

1 Like

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by soulglo: 5:44am On Sep 04, 2014
Ladystewie: haba oga, you wicked oh lipsrsealed
you should respect her wishes and keep off na
do you think it's easy to have something the size of a watermelon forced through something the size of an orange
she may still be in pains, and you ought to show her full support ooh
I know it aint easy to contain your urge, but please, bear with her for the time being, until she feels strong enough to get intimate with you


Excuses excuses excuses

2 Likes

Re: Advice Pls: Having Intimacy With My Wife After 3 Months Of Giving Birth by soonest(f): 10:25am On Sep 04, 2014
@op, women heal differently as our bodies aint the same. Some tears even take longer than 3months to heal. The fear of another pregnancy after birth is real family planning or not. My advice, be patient with her. The first time is usually d hardest, thank God you have crossed that line. Invest in a lot of KY jelly esply if she's nursing and go gentle on her. At first don't expect frequently sex like b4 but gradually she will get her groove back. Congrats on ur baby

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