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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. (7277 Views)
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Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 10:54am On Dec 21, 2014 |
I assume the cousin's kids are older, so once they are too big for the clothes, your kids get them. I see nothing wrong in it. In fact, it has plenty of advantages. Clothes that are still good are not being thrown away and wasted. Kids grow quickly so clothes that are still good are often thrown away. Save the environment. You can save money. Even if you can afford new clothes, why not save some money where possible? Be economical even if you don't have to. It is said that second-hand clothes are better because they contain less of some toxic dyers as they have already been washed several times. The child's skin is protected better. Health! 1 Like |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by KanwuliaJara: 11:17am On Dec 21, 2014 |
taryour: Same to you! We claim it! Amiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin ooooooooooooooooooh!!!!! |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 12:37pm On Dec 21, 2014 |
There isn't anything wrong with it. In fact my eldest sibling will keep them for the next grandchild in line especially if it's one she likes very much. She shares with her close friends as well. There are some clothes that have gone round 4 girls as thier age difference isn't much, i'm even waiting for new arrivals sef. It has nothing to do with "Social Status" or how much ncome or money. If you don't want it, give it to people who need it. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by quest003: 1:31pm On Dec 21, 2014 |
kingmorgan:your comment reeks of arrogance, you think being wise or sensible is by age or marriage? By the way, since you are married and experienced, why not solve your problem yourself? |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Agrika: 2:32pm On Dec 21, 2014 |
O.p u are a good and responsible man, cos only a good and RESPONSIBLE husband with a good sense of pride will see something wrong with it...sit ur wife down and explain how this is affecting ur self-esteem and if it is even possible carry style hint Aunty-distributor cousin that her "services" are really appreciated but not needed. 4 Likes |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Rosarie(f): 8:10pm On Dec 21, 2014 |
my bro pls no pride.for me i am not all dat wealthy yet at times still get zero in my account which i kno has ended dis year.i hate used clothes for kids with a passion.but for ur story is like a let down abeg.why can she not buy cheap new clothes and send down.why must it be wen her kids are done with it.is not as if she has ever visited for 2 whole years or sent d kids down to visit.a distant relative for that matter.u re d man of d house.nl can not help u.put urself down and help yourself by talking your wife.but women re usually but sensitive to things like dis.pls caution ur wife to be more senitive to tins oo cos life is dangerous n wicked 5 Likes |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by kingmorgan(m): 2:06am On Dec 22, 2014 |
Thanks so much, I will Rosarie: |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by kingmorgan(m): 2:08am On Dec 22, 2014 |
Bro i left that comment for some people who did not think and wrote, i did not mean single people are not wise, i only want them to stop contributing on what they know nothing about, you know some people just look at your post and reply rubbish. quest003: |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by kingmorgan(m): 2:10am On Dec 22, 2014 |
She gave birth last four month to her third child. my daughter is 16months carefreewannabe: |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by kingmorgan(m): 2:15am On Dec 22, 2014 |
Am happy you said Less Priviledged, Am not one bro i live by the Grace of God, and like i said i got married two years ago and will be moving to my own duplex next few months, am not saying am rich but am ok, why do you feel i have pride. i am not holding anything against you i only need honest answers. mployer: 2 Likes |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Femsyn(m): 7:04pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
The issue here is, you were sent clothes cos they think you probably need them. Personally, I'd rather give d needy than give someone who's fed and full, like OP. Appreciation goes a long way to do more, especially when it comes from those in need. It gives some form of fulfilment. Unfortunately in this case, the appreciation will be far-fetched. Its quite sad that most Nigerians are hypocrites, cos I see absolutely nothing wrong in making ur stance known to the cousin. Who knows, they may actually look for better ways of distributing their used clothes to those who really need them, instead of wasting them by giving you. However, wisdom is key in the manner you approach the issue. Again, what must be said, must be said! 1 Like |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 8:24pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
OP, I am solidly behind you. Even if people call it pride, I can vehemently say, there is a degree of pride a family man exudes on issues that try to bruise his ego as a "capable head of the house". On a basic level, gifts should be channelled to where they would be appreciated. Once one party doesn't feel comfortable with it - it has lost its relevance. Now, is the gift worth re-gifting i.e are they in good conditions? If yes *don't fret/fuss over nothing -donate/ give them out to someone who needs them most. If it makes you feel better......have an effective heart-to-heart talk with your wife, let her relate your message to her cuz. That's all 5 Likes |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Truckpusher(m): 8:29pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
carefreewannabe:Plausible...... First time of hearing some good advice from you to a family in this section.I hope your co-travelers are turning a new leaf? But doesn't still change the fact that you roll with a Mexican drug cartel member - Which one of them do you roll with again? Knight's Templers? |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 8:45pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
Truckpusher: LOL I can't help but like you a little bit. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Truckpusher(m): 8:48pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
carefreewannabe:''Like me a lil bit''? Isn't that a bribe? - they call it 'shut up bribe' |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 8:53pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
Truckpusher: No bribery, I am fully aware that I will make you talk sooner or later again. My opinion is just too provocative for you. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Truckpusher(m): 9:07pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
carefreewannabe:Now that I have known that you're just doing it for the fun - I'll try and ignore unless they still come too corrosive. But seriously, some of your co-travelers need to be spanked on the asss. That reminds me ,where is chilisauce? That lady is local,I like her vibes and the way she writes especially when she said '' dem go hear whin'' ,but abusing my parents was a no go area,it was totally uncalled for - But I have forgiven her childishness. Say me 'hi' to her. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 9:09pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
KanwuliaJara: what do you mean, I won't accept continuity of such offer either |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 9:09pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
Truckpusher: This is between you and Chilli. By the way, I am not doing everything for the fun of it. I mean what I say. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Truckpusher(m): 9:13pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
carefreewannabe:Well go ahead and set the world on fire - I have this tendency of turning a blind eye and watch my friends do all the wrong things for the wrong reasons. Go on and do whatever you like ,I won't bite - I'm tried of losing friends everyday Even Mondisweets won't talk to me anymore and that's bad already. We've been friends for too long, just to lose her friendship over a trivial issue. It doesn't make sense. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 9:20pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
Truckpusher: I hope she can forgive you. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Truckpusher(m): 9:22pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
carefreewannabe:She will. I just let her be for now ,after now she'd miss our friendship like I do right now and she would come around. But you sha! - smh |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by KanwuliaJara: 9:37pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
OsHYBRID: Your prerogative! I am soooooooooooooooooooooo glad the wife is smarter! The marriage is doomed to fail anyway! Just the tip of the iceberg! |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 9:52pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
If people call it pride, they are not totally wrong however what is certain and most important is that you are not comfortable with it. People differ and btw everyone need some element of pride to uphold their self worth. Your wife is the best person to pass the message to her cousin. She is ok prolly cos its obtainable in their family and it seems she is not that good/choosy/stylish with clothes buying to be so relax with it. Nonetheless she should stop it cos your are not comfortable just as you hopefully would do for her when not comfortable with a thing. She should send like 2 to 3 new clothes esp this gift season to her cousin informing her that you got them for her 3 months baby along with others you bought for your child and that the clothes are now so much that she is giving out old ones to those who need them hence cousin should look for people around her that need clothes to give any one she has. Her cousin will definitely get the message. If she still cant stop her cousin, stop her from wearing your child the used clothes, she definitely will find her way around the unsued usued clothes then...But em op this na small issue na, this one you dey ask if hm ok as a man? I hope you dont question your authority for every issue cos it can hugely turn your wife off, what you have there is personal preference whether male or female. 2 Likes |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 9:59pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
kingmorgan: Please stop that nonsense, it doesn't make any sense to me, Tell her you find it inappropriate. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 10:03pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
kingmorgan: Don't apologize for being perceived as proud, every human need some bit of pride for the benefit of self worth. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Agrika: 10:38pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
If that cousin of hers was genuinely generous what's preventing her from buying BRAND NEW kid's cloths even though is cheap ones, but she has to "dash" the O.p's kids her children's USED clothes, she don see dumping ground abi...those clothes would be better appreciated in orphanage homes or some "financially-challenged" family. Life is complex and Nigerians are one kind funny ppl, tomorrow should any strife come up between u guyz she will be the first to remind you say "all" ur children clothe na she dash u. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 10:54pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
Truckpusher: |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by remsonik(f): 10:56pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
Op you haven't told us the level of closeness and type of relationship which exists between your wife and her cousin. My cousins on the maternal side are more or less like sisters to me and my siblings and if you see us relate you can't really tell we are born of different parents. However it seems you don't like the gesture because its demeaning to your status, if you don't like it find a subtle way to tell her to stop sending the clothes. However the way and manner you say it matters and such little things can strain the family bond between you wife's family. Better still give it to the less privileged around you and you and your wife too should try send down gifts for her kids too. Its more blessed to give than to receive remember. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by ogawisdom(m): 9:56am On Dec 23, 2014 |
If u dnt need d cloth jst call them and politely but firmly tell them u dnt need dt clothes y is dt so hard for u to do. Rubbish I dnt collect wat I dnt need frm ppl. E ga egi ehere rie nsi. Nerve and courage is d trade mark of a great character. So many over grown babies answerin men these days. |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Evina(f): 10:46am On Dec 23, 2014 |
Mondisweets: LOL This is the funniest comment I have read on this thread. Madam, please don't be hasty to give advice. Go back and read the original post, then come modify your post. 3 Likes |
Re: Will You Be Happy About This As A Man. by Nobody: 11:00am On Dec 23, 2014 |
@op I don't understand why you must accept what you don't want. |
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