source:www.tlkdrum.com

written by mayo bayo

I went to 3 different cinemas in Lagos and I met these 10 categories of people:

The Commentator

As Chiwetel Ejiofor, who played the role of Odenigbo was looking into the Olanna’s eye in the movie half of the yellow sun, a romantic scene was gradually building up … next thing was this loud guy in the middle row of the cinema hall shouting,
“Correct guy! I dey feel you joo!. Kiss am, you too dey form jare! You just dey dull”.

At this moment I felt like punching this dude right on his balls. His loud outburst just kept interrupting my favorite scenes .To himself he was whispering, to me he was just another loud jerk.Like why now, this is not a football match we don’t need your commentary!

Loud chewer

Popcorn and movies go hand in hand,don’t know the history about this ,it’s a tradition everywhere in the world but do you have to chew out loud like a Sokoto gudali cattle ? I have seen your popcorn, do I have to hear it too?

1 The leg stretcher

I was still wondering where the smell was coming from, only to see some dude with his sugar cane legs close to my nose killing it softly with his stinky socks. Why not just position them to your row and not stretch them towards my sit?

2 He who laughs last …

Laugh best they say, but that was not the case for this guy that sat on the row before me, 60secs after the scene this dude is still HAHA-ing! Ok that scene was funny, yes and we all laughed but can you now shut up so that we can hear what’s coming next?

3 The questioner

“Chairman please what did he just said that was funny?”

I was like what the hell, did I pay to come narrate movies, or what are your satellite dish ears made for. Ok I didn’t say that, else I would have been writing this post from hospital bed. You need to see the guys’ biceps

4 The Bokoharam baby

Smiling at the large screen and sipping my Pepsi … and all of a sudden this baby starts bawling its lungs out, I cringed at the noise. Secretly I felt like squashing the little bugger (don’t think I am psychopathic).
Why do some mothers bring their baby to the cinema? Why not just sit in your house and enjoy a DVD movie with your family. Stop torturing the poor kid with high Dolby surround sound from those gigantic speakers

more on the list after the cut
.http://www.tlkdrum.com/annoying-kind-of-nigerians-i-met-at-the-cinema/

We no fit talk
incase cos all this type of post dey go front line

Nigerians dont attend cinimas except they are going there to pick pocket or sleep. So where do the op get all these rubbish from.

Redoil:
Nigerians dont attend cinimas except they are going there to pick pocket or sleep. So where do the op get all these rubbish from.

dey no tell u make u stop smoke igbo?

nice one

Phew!
The spoilt brats
These set of people sit behind u and talk all turned the movie. They are either going to buy popcorn or chocolates and smoothies that they slurp and make u feel like kicking them out. They make u regret watching a daytime movie. Once a lady had to caution some teen girls not more than 15 years of age

The love birds
These ones go to a corner and find the darkest spot to kiss n smooch once lights out

The late comers
These ones walk into the room almost 45 mins after a movie has started. Abeg wetin remain to watch?

The fatty
This one carries his weight and almost make u miss the scene whiles he's looking for a seat with hot dog in hand and coke in the next


The miss road
This one enters a room and only realises after 15 minutes after the movie has commenced that he is in the wrong room. He probably paid for 'wedding ringer' and is in the room showing 'John wick'. He begins to find ask others probably disturbing them.

The photographer
This one is just there to take pictures and next her pm is 'at d movies chilling'

The camera man
This one actually makes me laugh. He brings out his fone to video the movie. And it makes me wonder if hand no dey pain am


the phone user
This one uses their fone 70% of the time all through the movie and u end up wondering why they bought a ticket when they could just sit outside n press the fone well. The light from those fone distracts. Adjusting the brightness does the trick


The newbies
These ones probably visit the cinema once a year maybe during Christmas and they ask u pls what's showing while looking up at the screen that shows the schedule.

nice...I agree with Candygosh also

Odunharry:
nice...I agree with Candygosh also

Follow follow go sleep isn't it past ur bedtime u this guy? Which category u belong. Ok I know

It must be the clueless ones: these ones just one carry babe go out n straff and poor boy na cinema the awoof girl choose. As babe dey laugh with big popcorn bag n Ice cream, bro dey wonder wetin dey make am laugh as he no understand the movie. You just dey calculate the chain wey remain to enter bus go house after u don comfortably put babe inside cab go house

Kidding I'm probably high on moi moi

candygosh:


Follow follow go sleep isn't it past ur bedtime u this guy? Which category u belong. Ok I know

It must be the clueless ones: these ones just one carry babe go out n straff and poor boy na cinema the awoof girl choose. As babe dey laugh with big popcorn bag n Ice cream, bro dey wonder wetin dey make am laugh as he no understand the movie. You just dey calculate the chain wey remain to enter bus go house after u don comfortably put babe inside cab go house

Kidding I'm probably high on moi moi

sorry o....na wetin those guys dey do to u??eyaa it is well..
Bokoharam baby





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