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He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by JJYOU: 9:38pm On Jan 10, 2009
He is married, but I’m pregnant for him
By Kemi Ashefon
Published: Saturday, 10 Jan 2009

I am 32 and have dated a married man for six years. Recently, I discovered that I was 14 weeks pregnant, but he wanted an abortion. I refused because I have had two abortions. He cut off communications with me and went about telling stories about me. What do I do?

R.S, Lagos.

I still can’t fathom why some single girls run after married men.

First, I want you to know that a large percentage of those men are not ready to have another wife. They need mistresses that can satisfy their lust whenever their wives misbehave at home, pregnant or nursing babies. Though there are some who really go out to have extramarital affairs to requite their wives’ wrong-doings, they still don’t think of marrying those girlfriends. Only a few of them would really want a second wife, and this could be due to infertility or marital stress. What do you do? Maybe you hold on till he accepts.

I am not an advocate of abortion, so I would not advise you to go ahead with it. At 32, I don’t think it is safe. Exercise patience and discuss more with him; he could change his mind.

http://www.punchng.com/Articl.aspx?theartic=Art200901100122126
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by JJYOU: 11:42pm On Jan 10, 2009
Exercise patience and discuss more with him; he could change his mind.
does she look like she has patience? decisions and consequences as they say.

how many think they can enjoy the pleasures of sin and get away with it.
another no string attached relationship
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by benincitys(f): 1:19am On Jan 11, 2009
why not use condom ? people still play with their life,
GOD help women who open their legs for married man .
i pity her men sef one is not enough for them
one wife one problem two women double problem.

1 Like

Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by HRhotness(f): 1:24am On Jan 11, 2009
its nuthin new or particuarly special. . . did she expect him to dump his wife and marry her. . . i cant believe women still fall for that trick.

she's old enough to raise a child so she shd go for it. . . she isnt getting any younger and d guy might hav a change of heart, or not.

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Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by JJYOU: 1:38am On Jan 11, 2009
benincitys:

why not use condom ? people still play with their life,
GOD help women who open their legs for married man .
i pity her men sef one is not enough for them
one wife one problem two women double problem.
little is never enough
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by rubi(f): 2:46am On Jan 11, 2009
Good for her most women learn in a hard way maybe that is the only way she could learn
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by tpia: 2:56am On Jan 11, 2009
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Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by Nobody: 4:03pm On Jan 11, 2009
D
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by Nobody: 4:14pm On Jan 11, 2009
They both share the blame, now a child is involved. If partnernity is proven, he would need to support the child and mothe financially.
Why is it that when a married man is indiscplined and go off chaasing skiirts, we always foind a way to blame the woman.

1 Like

Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by Nobody: 4:53pm On Jan 11, 2009
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Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by LIMUEL(m): 5:55pm On Jan 11, 2009
The deed has been done so just follow your heart
We all make our mistakes in life
I pray you learn from this one and move on
Dont let this tear you down

1 Like

Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by SeanT21(f): 6:17pm On Jan 11, 2009
Homewrecker!!!

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Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by jamace(m): 10:04pm On Jan 11, 2009
Ehen. E don happen. Yesss! every day for the thief but one day for the owner. Madam owner, please come quickly, God don catch one of those girls doing illegal bunkering in your property with the aid of your husband. Please come with pepper.

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Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by emilyone(f): 10:04am On Jan 12, 2009
its such a disgrace , that people still go as far as having sex without protection, does she think she is the only concubine this stupid man has.

or maybe she has the intention of using the pregnancy to trap the man into taking her as a second wife since age is no longer on her side.

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Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by Okijajuju1(m): 10:23am On Jan 12, 2009
I cant believe that Nigerians still behave like this.
So jus because we have read the girls story, we have decided to start labelling her as a Home-breaker, Husband-snatcher, Man-trapper, e.t.c.
Lets please stop with all the name calling please. Its like lemuel siad, we all make our mistakes, she just made hers and we are here judging her. Atlest she had the boldness to share it on the news paper instead of going postal on the man and his family.

@ Topic

My dear, Yawa don gas, but e neva explode yet.
I would advice she examines her life and see if she can accomodate the baby in her life as it is without the assistance of the father, also to weigh the responsibilities that comes with having a baby, and see if she is ready for that now. I have always stood by abortion so I will advice that she seeks professional counsel form a qualified doctor, and if it is possible, and still an option, then sayonara unborn baby.

I dont know the circumstances on which your relationship with this married man was based, but I think it was a pretty dumb idea not using contraceptives (Pills or condoms). The man must have tought that since you evacuated the first two, you would by now be conversant with the drills to take if shit like that happened, but for your own reason, you have decided to rebel.

I wish you well o, but I know that it is very rare but not uncommon for m arried men to leave their wives for their mistresses.

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Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by ariblaze(m): 11:49am On Jan 12, 2009
i can't believe women still fall for that trick.

sorry did you read the story like i did

HR hotty, i remember having debates with you 2years ago

you never used to jump to them conclusions like this

did he lie to her about being single?

did he tell her to get pregnant for him?

did he say he would leave his wife for her?


com'n if he was silly enough not to use a condom

she should have wised up by being on the pills

if i were her, keep my baby, get him to be a part of his life

and have to contend with my child, either not liking him much or plain resenting him


she is to blame here
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by benincitys(f): 1:58pm On Jan 12, 2009
Okija_juju:

I can't believe that Nigerians still behave like this.
So jus because we have read the girls story, we have decided to start labelling her as a Home-breaker, Husband-snatcher, Man-trapper, e.t.c.
Lets please stop with all the name calling please. Its like lemuel siad, we all make our mistakes, she just made hers and we are here judging her. Atlest she had the boldness to share it on the news paper instead of going postal on the man and his family.
sorry she is a home- breaker what will a 32 year old woman be doing with a married man with children and all the wrost part of it she was doing it without condom .
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by Busybody2(f): 4:50pm On Jan 12, 2009
@ post

Avenge or let go wink

SeanT21:

Homewrecker!!!

Yeah I agree, the man is an homewrecker wink He should have kept his wandering JT to himself, but now he has wrecked his marriage, lol grin grin grin
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by plappville(f): 5:05pm On Jan 12, 2009
@ POSTER yOU HAVE STOLEN SOMEONE'S HUSBAND U STILL HAVE THE BOLDNES TO PUBLISH IT HERE, HOW WILL U FEEL IF U WERE TO BE IN THE STUPID MAN'S WIFE SHOE? I HATE TO KNOW U GIRLS THAT KEEP RUNING AROUNG MARRIED MEN, U KNOW WHAT ASKED GOD WHAT U SHOULD DO BECAUSE UR HAVE JUST SINED AGAINST GOD AND MAN. AT LEAST AT THE AGE U MENTIONED U ARE SUPOSED TO BE SOMEBODIES WIFE IF U REALLY WISED TO BE WITH A MAN AND NOT BEEN WITH ANOTHER WOMAN'S HUSBAND. A LONG LOUD HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS sad
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by TOYOSI20(f): 4:53am On Jan 13, 2009
Ummm. . . . they say as u lay ur bed so will u lie on it. . . .

So yeah shes in for it, she needs to brace up, and seek to put the child's intrest first in all things,

it really isn't about her anymore really!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! undecided

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Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by spikedcylinder: 9:14am On Jan 13, 2009
I still can’t fathom why some single girls run after married men.

I have a problem with this.
Did she pursue him or did he pursue her? Both parties are to blame but I would blame the married man more. He's married and running after single ladies! I don't think you realise how difficult it is for some people to say no to material things? Not only would he lure her into his demesne, he would entice her the finer things of life. Please also bear in mind that she's 32.

She's old enough to take care of herself and her baby (though I fear it won't be an easy task doing that on her own.) and she should do just that!
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by Riskie(f): 9:26am On Jan 13, 2009
She already flushed two potential children down the drain. Maybe the third one is the last that God will allow her to have in this life. The idiot should just keep the baby.I wonder why people stay for years in relationships they know are going nowhere. On top of that you keep aborting children. I don't get that. How the hell are people OK with murdering their own flesh and blood. If you know a child is not what you want at the moment, then do what it takes to prevent such "mistakes" ie abstinence or protection. People like this are seriously disgusting!

1 Like

Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by initiate: 11:08am On Jan 13, 2009
this whole issue is as a result of culture shock. there is a great problem of disorientation due to the difficulty of marrying our traditional culture with the oyinbos. an african man is naturally polygamist and he is programmed to have many wives. unfortunately we have adopted the western culture which does not permit this. therefore the only compromise available is to have girlfriends. the man should not be looked at as promiscuous, he is just being true to type. and all of you who are quick to criticize the girl, have you tried to put yourselves in her shoes? please tell us you story about what you did in similar situation

my advise to her is to move out of town and bring up her child alone. one day the man will thank her for bringing up the child, hopefully it will be a male child.
in the meantime she could still find a man to marry her if she has a good personalty.

all the best
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by JJYOU: 11:16am On Jan 13, 2009
initiate:

this whole issue is as a result of culture shock. there is a great problem of disorientation due to the difficulty of marrying our traditional culture with the oyinbos. an african man is naturally polygamist and he is programmed to have many wives. unfortunately we have adopted the western culture which does not permit this. therefore the only compromise available is to have girlfriends. the man should not be looked at as promiscuous, he is just being true to type. and all of you who are quick to criticize the girl, have you tried to put yourselves in her shoes? please tell us you story about what you did in similar situation

my advise to her is to move out of town and bring up her child alone. one day the man will thank her for bringing up the child, hopefully it will be a male child.
in the meantime she could still find a man to marry her if she has a good personalty.

all the best
you are excusing the inexcusable. who programmed africans to have many wives they cant take care of
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by malaria(f): 1:00pm On Oct 25, 2014
Hmmmmmm 32years, 2 abortions for the man, dated him for six years. Na wa o! The first abortion should have told you the man doesn't mean while. I wouldn't blame the man though because you an adult. Abortion is not the option, if u love the man enough to keep the baby, zero your mind and let him take responsibilities for his action . If he insists on terminating the pregnancy then make sure a you check your health to make sure your womb won't be damaged. Whatever you decide walk out of that relationship.
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by Nobody: 5:01am On Nov 24, 2015
grin, sorry. but you know you've been hiding all this years, i won't use any wrong word here, cos i will send this link to my big daughter. well, I don't know if you have married or u have kids somewhere, cos 32 years suppose to be a married woman. but don't abort d pregnancy, locate ur friends who can cater for u or go stay with ur mama, simple as that. doh
Re: He Is Married, But I’m Pregnant For Him by Dynmyt: 4:39pm On Jan 20, 2022
initiate:
this whole issue is as a result of culture shock. there is a great problem of disorientation due to the difficulty of marrying our traditional culture with the oyinbos. an african man is naturally polygamist and he is programmed to have many wives. unfortunately we have adopted the western culture which does not permit this. therefore the only compromise available is to have girlfriends. the man should not be looked at as promiscuous, he is just being true to type. and all of you who are quick to criticize the girl, have you tried to put yourselves in her shoes? please tell us you story about what you did in similar situation

my advise to her is to move out of town and bring up her child alone. one day the man will thank her for bringing up the child, hopefully it will be a male child.
in the meantime she could still find a man to marry her if she has a good personalty.

all the best
Who made this law of monogamy aint it men, even if its biblical does it not have male factor undertone... So why whyning

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