Dear Recruiter,

I hope this meets you well. Thanks for your offer but I have some conditions of my own.

I am only going to wake up by 5am to prepare for work due to traffic to make it to work before 8am if the pay is at least N200,000/month. And if for any reason you expect me to wear a tie to work, kindly make the pay at least N500,000/month because the heat in Nigeria is too much. I need enough air and need to feel free.

Lastly, if for whatever insane reason you expect me to wear a suit with the tie even if it is once a month then you would have to pay at least N 1,000,000/month. The weather conditions in Nigeria is not suited for that and I am not going to be sweating in a suit, therefore, you would have to provide a car and make sure my office is well air-conditioned. If you want me to look like I own the company, make me feel like it.

If you want me to dress in a certain way, kindly meet my above conditions.

Kind regards,

Tick.

Boss of boss oga oga