I laughed after reading this, think I should share
A little humour
Marriage Software
This is what a guy wrote to a Systems Analyst -
(Marriage Software Div);
Dear Systems Analyst,
I am desperate for some help! I recently upgraded
my program from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 and
found that the new program began unexpected Child
Processing and also took up a lot of space and
valuable resources.
This wasn't mentioned in the product brochure. In
addition Wife 1.0 installs itself into all other
programs and launches during systems initialization
and then it monitors all other system activities.
Applications such as "Boys' Night out 2.5" and "Golf
5.3" no longer run, and crashes the system
whenever selected. Attempting to operate selected
"Soccer 6.3" always fails and "Shopping 7.1" runs
instead. I cannot seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the
background whilst attempting to run any of my
favorite applications. Be it online or offline.
I am thinking of going back to "Girlfriend 7.0", but
uninstall doesn't work on this program. Can you
please help?
.... The Systems Analyst replied:
Dear Customer,
This is a very common problem resulting from a
basic misunderstanding of the functions of the Wife
1.0 program. Many customers upgrade from
Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0 thinking that Wife 1.0 is
merely a UTILITY AND ENTERTAINMENT
PROGRAM. Actually, Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING
SYSTEM designed by its Creator to run everything
on your current platform.
You are unlikely to be able to purge Wife 1.0 and still
convert back to Girlfriend 7.0, as Wife 1.0 was not
designed to do this and it is impossible to uninstall,
delete or purge the program files from the System
once it is installed.
Some people have tried to install Girlfriend 8.0 or
Wife 2.0 but have ended up with even more
problems. (See manual under Alimony/Child Support
and Solicitors' Fees).
Having Wife 1.0 installed, I recommend you keep it
Installed and deal with the difficulties as best as you
can. When any faults or problems occur, whatever
you think has caused them, you must run the.........
C:\ APOLOGIZE\ FORGIVE ME.EXE Program and
avoid attempting to use the *Esc-Key for it will
freeze the entire system.
It may be necessary to run C:\ APOLOGIZE\
FORGIVE ME.EXE a number of times, and eventually
hope that the operating system will return to
normal.
Wife 1.0, although a very high maintenance
programme, can be very rewarding.
To get the most out of it, consider buying additional
Software such as "Flowers 2.0" and "Chocolates
5.0" or "HUGS\ KISSES 600.0" or "TENDERNESS\
UNDERSTANDING 1000.0" or even Eating Out
Without the Kids 7.2.1" (if Child processing has
already started).
DO NOT under any circumstances install "Secretary
2.1" (Short Skirt Version) or "One Nightstand
3.2" (Any Mood Version), as this is not a supported
Application for Wife 1.0 and the system will almost
certainly CRASH.
BEST WISHES!
Yours,
Systems Analyst.

QUIET AMAZING

damn wife 1.0, that program can crash a system and leave it useless. I wish a new program surrogatemama 5.3 would be out soon na im sure pass in naija