So my best friend is a single mother, a really great young mom actually and she is holding onto a bad relationship because she's afraid her chances are slim to none. She's a biology major that graduates next year and is attending a physician assistant program after graduation, to say the least she is one ambitious twenty two year old girl! Immediately after she split up with her son's dad (her only boyfriend she's ever had) she began dating a Nigerian at her school who I feel just strung her along for sex but she believed they were intimate (beyond just sex). One day he disappeared and she was so crushed. After about a year she began to date an American guy who's really accomplished and seems to care about her but he cheats on her. I feel so bad because she continues to talk about how Nigerian men are so "romantic" and "different" and how she wishes she could marry a man like this but shes settling for this douche. I've heard many men say they will never date a woman with kids and though I've never dated a nigerian or any other african, I feel like the men are very harsh critics of women, especially those with children. I want to be a great friend to her, what do I say? How do I get my friend to realize she's a wonderful woman and that she shouldn't give up on finding a man that she truly loves and truly loves her back? Would I be lying to her if I told her this?

They shouldn't. Infact, contact Genevieve Nnaji

48noble:
They shouldn't.

So you feel like she should continue to date in hopes of finding a partner?

She should just move on and not think about any man and focus on her sun and future

Love comes when she would least expect

If she's trying too hard, Love would never come!!

Merlissa:
She should just move on and not think about any man and focus on her sun and future

Love comes when she would least expect

If she's trying too hard, Love would never come!!

I agree but how do you tell someone who's been hearing that forever and get them to believe it?

mamaducci:


I agree but how do you tell someone who's been hearing that forever and get them to believe it?

She needs someone whose's in her shoes and they can bond well..

I have a group I want to start for single mothers (my sister is my inspiration for starting this group)

She can join and I tell you together we are stronger!

There are hope and greater life ahead, all she needs to do is to stay focused and push her career along the lines she will meet someone who will value her.

Generally speaking, one needs to look before leaping, don't just accept to put up with anyone just because you feel lonely.

Tell yourself the exact kind of man you want to spend your life with esp to secure a good home for your kids.

On the other hand, a man could look beyond the single ladies situation but Would like to know the circumstances that led to the pregnancy, and I mean the truth. Eg was it out of wedlock, one night stand or rape, is the father dead or alive, has he @ccepted the responsibility of fathering the child.
He also should assess how he fits into your life eg interest, core values and morales etc
With these he can plan ways he can manage the affairs of a new home.


Personally there's nothing wrong marrying a single lady, just cross your T's and dot your I's and pray for the best

In PEJ's voice 'DONT GIVE UP'

It's just not a Nigeria thing, it's African. The painful truth is her chances of meeting a single unmarried man without kids to marry her is going to be very very hard. Being a single mum is not a crime, she should just focus on her life and that of her child.

Submit ur self to God
Nothing impossible
Either Single Dad or or single Dude
Pray for bone of ur bone
To secure peaceful Marital future
May God grant her heart desire

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