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Kunle the Badt Guy - Literature/Writing Ads - Nairaland

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Kunle the Badt Guy by HerexG(m): 8:32pm On Aug 21, 2015
It was a rainy day somewhere in the city of Lagos where the major percentage of hustlers live. With the trees swinging from left to right and people moving haphazardly looking for shade. Shop owners looking their shops and the market women trying so hard to cover their goods with thick polythene materials. Luckily for Kunle the rain started few minutes after he arrived work, he has saw this coming. The dim dark blue sky and the moisture hazy wind, this signs prompted him to hasten up so he could get to work faster.

Kunle got to work exactly 8:00am with all smile, staring at the sky and he said to himself "Oboy a little more minute this rain for soak me" . He quickly turned towards the table of their ever looking smart receptionist "Misturat". " Misturat" a busty bleached skin lady anyone would mistaken as a Yoruba actress.

" Good morning Misturat, abeg where the signing book" , she returned the greeting with a pleasant welcoming smile and handed over the signing book to Kunle. Kunle signed in as quickly as possible and fled to his call of duty.

When it comes to hustling Kunle is phenomenal, he is an epitome of a Lagos street boy. Kunle is a young man in his mid twenties, tall and dark African glow complexion with a skinny body build to compliment. He has just closed for the day. Kunle works in a Plastic manufacturing factory as a machine operator, from 8am to 5pm Monday to Friday then Saturday for extra time.

After all the hard day job it was finally 5pm the Kunle's official closing hour, suddenly Kunle hushed out of the factory and headed straight to the bathroom to freshen up. He hurriedly came out if the bathroom dried his body with a towel he picked from his designated locker, he hurriedly picked his boxers and quickly wore it , followed by his "I was white" singlet, jeans trouser and shirt. Shortly after he cane out of the dressing room he headed straight to "Misturat desk to signing out from work for the day.

He was in a haste to leave the factory, wishing he could dissappear out of the place at the snap of his fingers. He doesn't want his Indian supervisor to make him work some extra hours more, because there is always some thing more to do with " Mr Galazan". Mr Galazan with his strong Indian accent most likely would say

" Kunle come come please deri is one machine over deeri, go fix it"

He would definitely look for one other machine for Kunle work on or fix. Kunle occupies two vital position in the factory, he works as a machine operator and a machine engineer. But he only get paid for being a machine operator, all thanks to the labor exploitive "Mr Galazan" his biss . But as sharp Lagos boy Kunle would reply swiftly saying

" But sir I have closed already, the time is 6'O clock na "

As expected Kunle reply to his boss Galazan won't go down well with him, he would balantly say at Kunle's face

" what diri you mean, i pay you, I don't care even if you work till 12 midnight.

Kunle was in haste to leave the factory hall when he saw Mr Galazan from afar walking steadily with his attention fixated on the several machines making boisterous sounds in the factory, like a smoke disappearing into the sky Kunle left the factory hall. The secretary of the factory Misturat whose table was situated right beside the entrance of the factory was with all smile as Kunle fled, she sighed and said

"The fear of Galazan is the begining of wisdom for this company o, omolomo oseni saa" ( Why won't he flee)

Just like a prophet Kunle has successfully predicted his boss next plan of action . Mr Galazan a short Indian man with a mustache like that of Hitler's, with a bulgy eagle eyes and a pot belly. Mr Galazan would have make a perfect strict school lecturer. He approach the secretary desk looking a distance away trying to find Kunle, he tried staring harder to see if he would find him but he could so he immediately asked Misturat

"Where is that Kunle boy " ?

Misturat replied
" Kunle closed from work 5mins ago"

Galazan tighted up his serious looking face more at the response of the secretary, he looked into secretary eye and say " so immediately its 5pm this lazy boy just disappear from work ? I go see him tomaro "
Re: Kunle the Badt Guy by Nobody: 8:35pm On Aug 21, 2015
Reading
Re: Kunle the Badt Guy by Nobody: 8:48pm On Aug 21, 2015
Following............. cool
Re: Kunle the Badt Guy by Ask4bigneyo(m): 9:20pm On Aug 21, 2015
Present....
Re: Kunle the Badt Guy by agarawu23(m): 9:22pm On Aug 21, 2015
make I park my bus here cool
Re: Kunle the Badt Guy by HerexG(m): 2:17am On Aug 22, 2015
Kunle walking swiftly, wanting to leave the factory building asap, as he approached the gate he briefly exchange pleasantries with the gate, the security men checked him out and walked out of the gate.

Just walking few metres away from the factory building he saw the Lagos yellow buses with the bus conductor hanging by the bus entrance shouting out destinations as though his life depends on it, what caught Kunle attention was "Agege" the bus conductor mention. He immediately waved, the bus driver saw him and slow down the buses speed for Kunle to enter. Kunle gave the bus a hot chase, he got close to the entrance and hopped in.

Just as Kunle was about to sit down in the bus, one of the bus passenger exclaimed

" Shey na every bus/stop you go dey stop dey carry passenger, abi you think say we come play for your bus"

Other passengers joined the passenger who was complaining and there was this rowdiness in the bus as everyone was trying to make a point while the bus conductor too is trying to depend his boss the driver. This went on for fees minute, with Kunle sitting beside the bus door not minding the wailing passengers and the bus conductors.

Suddenly he felt his phone beeped, Kunle hissed and started grumbling with his hands trying to collect his phone from his tight jeans pocket

" This EmptyHen people no go allow person rest self with all this their useless messages wey them dey send give person self"

He finally brought out the wanting to read and delete the message EmptyHen (the network provider) sent him. As he opened the message and he saw

" Credit alert of 10, 000 000 naira from Mr Owonikoko"

On seeing this Kunle got excited beyond measure and shouted

" Jisos " !

So he immediately alerted the bus driver that he wants to get down from the bus

"Driver abeg stop ! stop I won come down " !

The passengers started reigning abuses on Kunle , one of them even raised an alarm

" Make Una check una pocket o, efit be one of those pick pocket boys"

Not minding them at all Kunle jumped out of the bus as the vehicle sped off, Kunle tried to regain his balance as he mounted on the ground . He quickly scanned around the place the bus stopped him, he was looking for a close by ATM vending machine, he sited one and quickly ran towards it. With a mystic smile on his face he murmured

"God don punish this bank people, thank God say I bring my ATM card"

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