Just two ways will work bro
1. Be very rich. Some people will still grumble
the surest way is
2. Go to bank dressed like a herbalist, with a little juju as ur necklace, everybody will leave d queue for u without noise

castroevans:
Fifth, become a billionaire, u don't need to go to the bank to encounter the stress of withdrawal, rather u would call the branch manager to bring the said amount to ur location.
6th, Make sure one of the tellers is your gurlfrnd, boyfriend or your very very good friend.

You don't need to become a billionaire to achieve this.

Tokens and cheques have got you covered.

Fart loudly in an uncountrollable manner

If you faint in a banking hall, the wise thing to do is to take you to the hospital or home, and that would make you lose your spot on the queue.

This happened a lot during the BVN stuff. You faint; you go home. A lady fainted and as she was being led home, she had to rush back to the queue and tell everyone she only closed her eyes, she didn't faint. Sometimes, Nigerians don't care. They will be glad to take your spot.

be a seriously madtly endowed babe

be the first customer on queue

castroevans:
Fifth, become a billionaire, u don't need to go to the bank to encounter the stress of withdrawal, rather u would call the branch manager to bring the said amount to ur location.
6th, Make sure one of the tellers is your gurlfrnd, boyfriend or your very very good friend.

chai the last one na true ooo..

One cruise were the one bank for oshodi, each time am dey i dont spend one minute on que...

But wetin i dey give am u people wont belive...

gmyguy:
be the first customer on queue

most time this does not help especially when the cashier hates your face, hates your face is popular with those old mamas in union bank....

So one should embarrass himself or herself because he/she wants to be attended to on time.My friend this is foolishness.It may backfire you know as not everyone is kindhearted.

No. 1 is very applicable in my bank, once we hear d cry of a baby we quickly attend to such customers.

I always tell them that, i want to see the

Manager. Then, i would ask the Teller

nearest to me to just deposit this

money for me as quickly as

possible.

Meanwhile,

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sketcherJ:
just for laughing sake bro

Big fool. What does that has to do with Hausa man?

Thats where i belong too, working so hard to become the 5th

darlenese:



I belong to the 6th group .

castroevans:
Fifth, become a billionaire, u don't need to go to the bank to encounter the stress of withdrawal, rather u would call the branch manager to bring the said amount to ur location.
6th, Make sure one of the tellers is your gurlfrnd, boyfriend or your very very good friend.

The last line (make sure the teller is your Girlfriend................or your very good friend) is the reason for most bank fraud because they will always have assess to your account and will tell everyone how much is there. It is known that most accounts to accounts frauds occur from such relationships.

Lolz!

sketcherJ:
Five Funny ways on how to get attended to fast/jump queue legally in a bank

In Nigeria today,most of the banks we have are very slow in their service,customers would have to wait on the queue for many minutes before they could be attended to.


Now I have devised five funny ways in which you can get answered to on time,believe me,noone would fight or argue with you when the bank cashiers are attending to you ,even if you are the last person on the queue..let's get to it already..

1.Get a Baby!!(lol,not for men though)yea,I am not telling you girls to go and get pregnant oo...just carry the baby of ur neighbour(tell d mother you are going to d bank !!don't let them lynch you ooo!!)when you get inside the bank,fill ur teller,go on the queue and pinch d good baby,when the cry of the baby rings the air..everybody on the teller would be pleading with the cashier to attend to you,(don't forget to buy biscuits for the cool baby oo)

2.Fall down and Faint!!(yes..men this is where you come in..its simple,stay on the queue and just fall down and close your eyes!!and make it some 2 minutes before you open your eyesviola!!you are a celebrity!!anytime you enter the bank,you will be answered to immediately (just pray your neighbour, abi your gf/bf no dey in the bank that day you fall oo)

3.ACT CRAZY LIKE TERRY G..if you don't know how to craze..abeg don't use weed oo..just take dry pepper with you and put it in ur bums..am telling you the craze that will be emanating from you will make headlines...(Lol)

4.Blow Grammars out of proportion: You don't need a dictionary, just go to Patrick Obahiagbon's social media handles,You will find your tools there..When you enter the bank, cooly fill your tellers, nope don't stay on the queue, just walk straight to the cashier....and BLOW YOUR GRAMMARS.


http://fresh-folks-ville..com/2015/08/five-funny-ways-on-how-to-get-attended.html?m=1

Hilarious

Bflexing:
Just two ways will work bro
1. Be very rich. Some people will still grumble
the surest way is
2. Go to bank dressed like a herbalist, with a little juju as ur necklace, everybody will leave d queue for u without noise

Hahaha

sketcherJ:
Five Funny ways on how to get attended to fast/jump queue legally in a bank

In Nigeria today,most of the banks we have are very slow in their service,customers would have to wait on the queue for many minutes before they could be attended to.


Now I have devised five funny ways in which you can get answered to on time,believe me,noone would fight or argue with you when the bank cashiers are attending to you ,even if you are the last person on the queue..let's get to it already..

1.Get a Baby!!(lol,not for men though)yea,I am not telling you girls to go and get pregnant oo...just carry the baby of ur neighbour(tell d mother you are going to d bank !!don't let them lynch you ooo!!)when you get inside the bank,fill ur teller,go on the queue and pinch d good baby,when the cry of the baby rings the air..everybody on the teller would be pleading with the cashier to attend to you,(don't forget to buy biscuits for the cool baby oo)

2.Fall down and Faint!!(yes..men this is where you come in..its simple,stay on the queue and just fall down and close your eyes!!and make it some 2 minutes before you open your eyesviola!!you are a celebrity!!anytime you enter the bank,you will be answered to immediately (just pray your neighbour, abi your gf/bf no dey in the bank that day you fall oo)

3.ACT CRAZY LIKE TERRY G..if you don't know how to craze..abeg don't use weed oo..just take dry pepper with you and put it in ur bums..am telling you the craze that will be emanating from you will make headlines...(Lol)

4.Blow Grammars out of proportion: You don't need a dictionary, just go to Patrick Obahiagbon's social media handles,You will find your tools there..When you enter the bank, cooly fill your tellers, nope don't stay on the queue, just walk straight to the cashier....and BLOW YOUR GRAMMARS.


http://fresh-folks-ville..com/2015/08/five-funny-ways-on-how-to-get-attended.html?m=1

Such stunts have a way of biting back. After several episodes of 1000 Ways To Die, I've learnt to take things easy.

Lol.. Its not applicable in all banks as some of them will deploy their security personnel to bundle you out of the banking hall notwithstanding you're carrying a crying baby or fainting. Eg Eco Bank because weda u fall or faint or even die, it can never speed up their slow and sluggish server.

sketcherJ:
Five Funny ways on how to get attended to fast/jump queue legally in a bank

In Nigeria today,most of the banks we have are very slow in their service,customers would have to wait on the queue for many minutes before they could be attended to.


Now I have devised five funny ways in which you can get answered to on time,believe me,noone would fight or argue with you when the bank cashiers are attending to you ,even if you are the last person on the queue..let's get to it already..

1.Get a Baby!!(lol,not for men though)yea,I am not telling you girls to go and get pregnant oo...just carry the baby of ur neighbour(tell d mother you are going to d bank !!don't let them lynch you ooo!!)when you get inside the bank,fill ur teller,go on the queue and pinch d good baby,when the cry of the baby rings the air..everybody on the teller would be pleading with the cashier to attend to you,(don't forget to buy biscuits for the cool baby oo)

2.Fall down and Faint!!(yes..men this is where you come in..its simple,stay on the queue and just fall down and close your eyes!!and make it some 2 minutes before you open your eyesviola!!you are a celebrity!!anytime you enter the bank,you will be answered to immediately (just pray your neighbour, abi your gf/bf no dey in the bank that day you fall oo)

3.ACT CRAZY LIKE TERRY G..if you don't know how to craze..abeg don't use weed oo..just take dry pepper with you and put it in ur bums..am telling you the craze that will be emanating from you will make headlines...(Lol)

4.Blow Grammars out of proportion: You don't need a dictionary, just go to Patrick Obahiagbon's social media handles,You will find your tools there..When you enter the bank, cooly fill your tellers, nope don't stay on the queue, just walk straight to the cashier....and BLOW YOUR GRAMMARS.


http://fresh-folks-ville..com/2015/08/five-funny-ways-on-how-to-get-attended.html?m=1

All these brouhaha just to pay in my money again. Il simply make a friend and even dump the fill out form for him/her to pay in. Well this is one of the best ways, but since ur talking of funny ways, comedians can do that.

kamez:
for me, first impression matters so it's important to dress real good and look sophisticated with a mind blowing perfume. works like magic on the female staff..



but above all, just make money and have lots of it in ur account...

trust me if u have cool millions in ur acc. na bank manager office u go dey make it transaction's.and besides ur acc officers will be at ur beck and call whenever u need them

...and they will bring you hamper on your birthday and also pay you courtesy visits that are actually uncalled for. yes, uncalled for

MEILYN:
Guy na wa for you ooo. Come try this one for Okokomaiko wey boys eyes dey red. As you faint, person go even enter the line wey you dey before, them go order security to put you for chair, blow you breeze and pour you water.

When you wake up, e go surprise you say you go still join the queue.

Lmao!!!

Funny

If u like faint in ecobank or carry convulsions, nobody will look at u. that is the bank you will go to withdraw or deposit that Tellers will be sending you on an errands to take tickets for authorization for him. ecobank with poor customer service.
hmm I detest their service.

just came to book my own space




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