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Veteran comedian, Ali Baba has narrated his hilarious massage experience in the hands of an Ijaw man. He wrote

Ehen oooo! Shebi... That's how I stupidly agreed to follow my cousin to get a massage from an Ijaw man today. All my friends advised me against it. But hey! After all, My own cousin can't wish me bad! Was I wrong?!!! This wicked Ijaw man started by putting one boiling pot of life on my stomach for 15mins... All the salad inside me from breakfast DONE! Then he made me sit on another pot...


That one heated me from under, I felt like someone waiting for his election result. After some people will say they don't know what is destroying the ozone layer. If 9ice tries it, he will become Alapokan! Then the massage... See, That man is a winch. Nothing else. He massaged me with all the power he could muster. He must have retired as a washaman from an army barracks.

To make matters worse, he was trying to put elbows where God did not. He bent my hands sooooo backward I nearly confessed I collected subsidies. He was not done. The monster now put his knee to the back of my neck and (applied the kind of pressure Igbo traders use to reduce 3 suitcases into one) then traced my spinal cord from my neck to my waist. And he had the guts to ask why I farted. If he sees me in that run down pigsty he calls clinic, he should call me monkey. Old bagga! PMB Cancel Amnesty NOW! As for my cousin, him own done set! I will do my own back.

When we left the place, to walk to the car, the sun was up... 11:36am. Everyone else had a shadow. Except me. My shadow had left me during that massage. I finally asked myself, who send me? PS: To everyone who finds this note funny... May God arrange your own in double portion. Nothing wey UNA no dey call joke. Winchzards! And to @frankedoho who just sat there and was just laughing... You are not a friend"

http://www.metroparrot.net/2015/10/photos-ali-baba-narrates-his-funny.html

cc: lalasticlala ishilove

Lwkmd..

Hahahahahaha your own don be Alibaba. That's what you get when you find a gym trainer in a make shift massage parlour wait ooo,bros dem dey use duve abi na blanket for massage parlour??







Heis!!!!!You above me!!!!you!! Yees you!! Chocolate yooouuu!!!! U no dey go shorsh??

LWKMD

Please whats funny...

Ali,sebi na massage parlour with cheaper rate u dey find?
your cousin don arrange u wella....hehehhhehehhe
#UrCousinMyKindOfGuy#

need to pour water to undry d joke

Alibaba and Ay jokes are dry,Ay understood that and stepped to planning shows and movies but alibaba still clueless.

Alibaba is still in you. This is what I'll call comic

edwife:
Alibaba and Ay jokes are dry,Ay understood that and stepped to planning shows and movies but alibaba still clueless.

you just gave DRY and CLUELESS a new definition. Ode

deadZONE:


Please whats funny...

adedayourt:
need to pour water to undry d joke

deadZONE:


Please whats funny...

am searching for the funny part too

quiinnBee:

am searching for the funny part too

quiinnbee no go church today

edwife:
Alibaba and Ay jokes are dry,Ay understood that and stepped to planning shows and movies but alibaba still clueless.

so u also think ay is dry

i no sabi who dry pass btw ay nd stockfish

adedayourt:


quiinnbee no go church today

am back.
first service closes 10am
i know you didnt go

quiinnBee:

am back.
first service closes 10am
i know you didnt go

my church is on midyear break

Write up kinda funny... Let Naijasinglegirl narrate that kind experience in writing and you would have not be able to stop laughing


Anyways, Ali Baba Ndoh

adedayourt:


my church is on midyear break

smh You need Jesus

Funny narration.

But the writer should have told us how he felt immediately afterwards? I bet all his stiff, aching muscles were put to rest, and he probably slept like a baby that night.

quiinnBee:

smh You need Jesus

i agree wit u dear, ll u take me to see Jesus in ur church