raayah:
daretodiffer, freecocoa, cococandy, MzMyColi, fem29, I would like to hear your input on this matter.

damiso:
Why is there an inference on this thread that stay at home mum equals home schooling?

Few children are home schooled.

Onegai's point was more about the fact that a stay at home mum has more disposable time to impart further knowledge that might not be covered extensively one on one in the school curricula.There is only a percentage of stay at home parents who actually home school their children.

Not too sure about home schooling though because I feel education is not just academics but also preparing children on how to interact with others/social skills etc etc .funny enough was going to start a thread on the issue of home schooling just never came round to it. I belong to a parent and teacher educational page on FB where someone posed the question but he was talking more of hiring actual qualified teachers on a salary that would more or less be the same costs that you would pay in most Naija private schools.His argument was at Least the child would be getting one on one tutoring. I thought it was an interesting idea and something that had existed in aristocratic England i.e hiring governesses.


Like I said I have always been of the opinion that the constant comparison is not necessary. I feel both sets have different challenges and none actually have it easy especially for those who have their children as their utmost priority. I would know cos I have been both.

And contrary to what is touted on NL, I was actually more tired on some days when k was home than now when I work full time. Get tif of the stereotype not all stay at home moms spend all their day gossiping and getting fat.

Onegai:


Thank you. I'm not saying stay home and teach your kids. And like you, I am MORE exhausted staying home with Baby E daily (there is no boss on earth as absorbed and demanding as a baby. No-one is THAT cray-cray )

Hmm, I'm intrigued by the idea of hiring qualified teachers and home-schooling. Because for all the millions spent on school fees in this Nigeria, more than half of them are not the top performers compared to their peers when Nigeria is being judged on the International market (chances are an ex-FGC schoolkid will outperform the almighty Corona schoolkid).

raayah:
The only problem I have is that Onegai is talking about the privileged (Rich) and well-educated women who become SAHM. These women know and have the resources to train their children. In the U.S, there is a lot of support for homeschooled children, they have their own syllabus and have various programs to assist them.

We all know that the average Nigerian woman works (mostly self-employed), but the few in-betweens who are full time SAHM's do not have the capability and resources to train her Child. Like Mindfulness asked, How will they write WAEC or NECO with all the various experiments you have to do especially in Physical science subjects. It's not easy for a non-professional to teach even basic physics.

You have great examples of women in your post but I don't think they represent the average pool of SAHM's in Nigeria.

However, If a woman want's to be a SAHM, go ahead, no restrictions, if she wants to work, no restriction . Both women have it equally hard.

Onegai:


Well, from my experience with a parent who was semi-retired when I was a child:

I could quote Shakespeare in iambic pentameter as a child, I knew about the stock exchange, knew a lot of History, read Jane Austen and all the classics including Homer's Iliad and could write formal, informal and all sorts of correspondence (my emails are beautiful till now ) and I wasn't even a teenager at this point. This was all because I had a educated parent with a lifelong thirst for learning who wasn't hampered by having to go to work and not have time for me. Here's the funny thing, I was an average student for all my brilliance because I was a bad test taker and our school system rewards the best test taker and crammer (every open book test i took, i nailed it). And my parent understood his curious and brilliant daughtr better than her teachers. My final year project, I got a supervisor whom even other lecturers were worried about, picked a topic that my defense board felt was too vast for an undergraduate project and nailed it to the point that I got an A, people were referred to my project and I can submit that project to governmental board for urban planning, because it was a practical project. But I had a 2. 2.

No school could give me the education my parent gave me. Or had that much patience. I was given a lifelong thirst for knowledge as a child.

I have a foreign friend who retired at 40 and spends his days with his son, learning. My nephews attend school with N1mil annual fee and can barely talk properly (because neither parent have time to reinforce whatever they learn). My other nephew and niece had a Stay at Home mum who was intelligent and tutored them and got admission into top-notch secondary schools in UK (to the point other mums had to beg her and offer pay for her to tutor their kids).

Everyone has their own opinion on these things.

raayah:
daretodiffer, freecocoa, cococandy, MzMyColi, fem29, I would like to hear your input on this matter.

Mindfulness:


@enigmatique

Thanks for the mention. This is a nice write-up and I can partly find little Mindfulness inside of the story...

fem29:
e

Hi Rayah. Me I am all for a working mother ooo. I stayed at home far too long and it can be quite counter productive with regards to teaching kids. It just all becomes too much, small children can drive you up the wall. I certainly could never do home schooling. I am just not good at teaching children. I get frustrated almost immediately. Now that they have started school full time, I am able to reinforce what they have learnt at school as they have taught them, we just need to practice at home. When I went for a meeting at school regarding teaching them phonics and how to read, it just seemed like , OMG, I don't remember anyone doing all this long thing with me, I don't remember how I learned to read .

But really it is such a tough juggling act with having enough time with the kids. Im starting work soon and I am so torn that I will not be spending so much time with them. Someone else will be picking and dropping off in school. I am soo worried about how they will cope. When I get back its just to bath them and bed . I dunno. Ill just have to give them all my attention at the weekend.

enigmatique:

You're very welcome bro. I guess the lesson for all of us is to make our educational proficiency to be the foundation from which our children start their own studies.

I'll try and look out for that thread of yours, that I will. Especially pray it will hit FP.

raayah:
daretodiffer, freecocoa, cococandy, MzMyColi, fem29, I would like to hear your input on this matter.

Mindfulness:


Fem dear, have faith in your kids, they will do well and they have your support, just be sensitive to their moods so that they can confide in you when something bothers them.

You will soon spend less time with them but the time you will make out for them will be quality time.

fem29:



Thanks soo much . I will admit I worry a lot. I don't have a support system so it's all on me. It's a lot

Mindfulness:


Most mothers worry a lot but it is good to have some faith too.

ayinba1:
This is an interesting topic. The conclusion of the study defined earning power and career success, but what is the true measure of success? When a family is able to effectively answer this question, the decision to be a SAHM over career mom will be made.

Mindfulness:


Elaborate.

I had come to worry about those women who were full-time mothers and homemakers by choice. Did other, more career-minded women have the right to devalue them . . . ? Maybe it was time to slow down and look at the role restrictions imposed not only on women but the men around them, to search for the balance that could promote self-sufficiency . . .


Lin Pardey, Bull Canyon: A Boatbuilder, a Writer and Other Wildlife