No mention of more sex or bungee jumps. A palliative nurse who has counselled the
dying in their last days has revealed the most
common regrets we have at the end of our lives.
And among the top, from men in particular, is 'I
wish I hadn't worked so hard'.
Bronnie Ware is an Australian nurse who spent
several years working in palliative care, caring for
patients in the last 12 weeks of their lives. She
recorded their dying epiphanies in a blog called
Inspiration and Chai, which gathered so much
attention that she put her observations into a
book called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying .
Ware writes of the phenomenal clarity of vision
that people gain at the end of their lives, and how
we might learn from their wisdom. "When
questioned about any regrets they had or
anything they would do differently," she says,
"common themes surfaced again and again."
Here are the top five regrets of the dying, as
witnessed by Ware:

1. I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to
myself, not the life others expected of me.
"This was the most common regret of all. When
people realise that their life is almost over and
look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how
many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people
had not honoured even a half of their dreams and
had to die knowing that it was due to choices
they had made, or not made. Health brings a
freedom very few realise, until they no longer
have it."

2. I wish I hadn't worked so hard.
"This came from every male patient that I nursed.
They missed their children's youth and their
partner's companionship. Women also spoke of
this regret, but as most were from an older
generation, many of the female patients had not
been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply
regretted spending so much of their lives on the
treadmill of a work existence."

3. I wish I'd had the courage to express my
feelings.
"Many people suppressed their feelings in order to
keep peace with others. As a result, they settled
for a mediocre existence and never became who
they were truly capable of becoming. Many
developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and
resentment they carried as a result."

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.
"Often they would not truly realise the full benefits
of old friends until their dying weeks and it was
not always possible to track them down. Many
had become so caught up in their own lives that
they had let golden friendships slip by over the
years. There were many deep regrets about not
giving friendships the time and effort that they
deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they
are dying."

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.
"This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not
realise until the end that happiness is a choice.
They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits.
The so-called 'comfort' of familiarity overflowed
into their emotions, as well as their physical lives.
Fear of change had them pretending to others,
and to their selves, that they were content, when
deep within, they longed to laugh properly and
have silliness in their life again."

What's your greatest regret so far, and what will
you set out to achieve or change before you die?

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/01/top-five-regrets-of-the-dying

True.
I think mine would be wishing I had allowed my self to live life free of all the unnecessary burdens we sometimes place on ourselves, becoming unduely melancholic at "minor" disappointments instead of just dusting it off and moving ahead.

7. WOuld be ......wish I actually discovered myself....only a fraction of men discover their self before death comes knocking.

Very soul-searching and informative post. I pray day in, day out, for this one thing, i want to leave this world empty. In other words, i want to achieve my God-given purpose for my existence. On my death-bed, there should be no regret(s) whatsoever.
We are indeed responsible for our happiness, so many of us are living the lives that the "so called" society have made for us. Very few of us are actually living our "lives" as it suppose to be.