First, we need to know how the mass of
Hell is changing in time.
So we need to know the rate at which
souls are moving into Hell and the rate at
which they are leaving.
I think that we can safely assume that
once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving.
As for how many souls are entering Hell,
let's look at the different religions that
exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you
are not a member of their religion, you
will go to Hell.
Since there is more than one of these
religions and since people do not belong
to more than one religion, we can project
that all souls go to Hell.
With birth and death rates as they are, we
can expect the number of souls in Hell to
increase exponentially.
Now, we look at the rate of change of the
volume in Hell because Boyle's Law
states that in order for the temperature
and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the
volume of Hell has to expand
proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate
than the rate at which souls enter Hell,
then the temperature and pressure in Hell
will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster
than the increase of souls in Hell, then the
temperature and pressure will drop until
Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by
Chidinma,
(Name changed to avoid embarrassment
and lawsuits ),
last summer that,
'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep
with you,'
and take into account the fact that I slept
with her
in ACTUAL fact, SEVERAL times,
then number two must be true, and thus I
am sure that Hell is exothermic and has
already frozen over.
The corollary of this theory is that since
Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is
not accepting any more souls and is
therefore, extinct......leaving only Heaven,
thereby proving the existence of a divine
being which explains why, last night,
Chidinma kept shouting
'Oh my God.'

And NOW my brain hurts