This work is purely fiction.
Writer: Omotayo Taofiq Suleman
E-mail: osuleman@gmail.com
Note: Don't copy and paste on other forums without the authors knowledge
(this work is unedited)

From the stables of GHOST production, in collaboration with INSIGHT presents:
ASH CLOUD
'My life is so practical,
it's like pulling the trigger of a gun
and hearing the bang! bang!! echo so loud into your hearings'

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I woke up that morning and wished I had never woken up into a world which never goes in my favor, there was nothing different and special about my life, too boring for what I had wished for. It was like any other morning of my boring life. Most times, I feel like my life is on an ‘auto-replay’ mode, every day of my seem the same. I lay on my bed thinking of how boring my life had been in the last few years, I strongly wished my life had been a lot freaky, full of bizarre activities, go strange places and participated in jaw-dropping activities, take a new adventurous turn of a sought ……o I wish!....
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[b] when I was much younger, I had fantasies being one of these heroic figures like spider-man, Bat-man, super-man, Robo-cop, Captain America, iron-man, Hulk, Van Helsing, Van Dam et.c. but as I grew older, I realized I can never grow up to be any of these imaginary figures but instead I try console myself with the thought that my life might miraculously transform from being a commoner of life to a sought of super-star celebrity such as 2baba, Wiz-kid, Davido, ChrisBrown, Olamide and lots more whose life experience would turn out to be a motivation to the youths but as the day roll by rapidly, I had to embrace the reality of my life as a commoner of this world like everybody else around me and by the way, I realized I had got no outstanding talent apart from my nature given handsome face and nice body structure which doesn’t pay the bills. I had even try followed someone’s advise who recommended I try modeling but out of the numerous agents I had submitted my profile to, only one advertising agent needed my service for a ‘waka-pass’ role in which I earned very little amount which couldn’t feed me for three days.
Deep down in me, I knew I was meant for something bigger. I knew I had the potential to do something great, I felt as if every seconds of my life is going to a waste, I felt there was something within me the world needed to see. I remembered my mother taking me to a white garment church where a woman said she had a vision of me being a very rich man through an unexpected means but I might end up my life in the dark side of life unless prayer and fasting is carried out. Honestly, I couldn’t tell if my mother did as instructed but I was sure she will do whatever it takes to protect her children, though that was a very long time ago.
“Baba God abeg pick-up the call o!” I said in a mellow tone as I practically crawled out of bed
I grabbed my bucket, soap case, tooth-brush and towel, dashed out of my one-room apartment.

In front of the toilet was this usual long queue of my fellow co-tenants who were also there to make use of it just like I was about to.
“Oloshi….shey you no go come out from dat place, abi you dey there they read dictionary?” someone on the queue shouted
“no mind am, na so she dey always do…..dat girl fit spend century inside dat place” another person said
The door to the toilet suddenly opened and Lady Cynthia walked stylishly out from the toilet, she seems not to bother about what people say about her, she was a known hard-core prostitute who never gives a damn about what people say about her. She had promised to leave the compound and go find herself a self-contain apartment when she takes her business from the local level she operates and go international by ‘doing bigger men’.
“shiooo!!....see as she be like Jezebel, oloshi ashawo” Anna who is one of my female co-tenant in front of me whispered.
“Anna, abeg wetin be your own sef? Leave the babe alone, at least she no dey disturb you.
She turned her face towards me and gave me the look that seems to read “e be like sey u don dey sleep with lady Cynthia abi?”
And I also gave her the look that reads something like this “Abeg, dat olosho no be my own kind of person ooo” even though I knew deep down in me that it was a lie. For the past three months now, I have been having an intimate relationship with Lady Cynthia….but that is within the sphere of my dreams.
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Lemme follow after waking up I'd read

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Sorry guys, I forgot to introduce myself. I simply go by the name ‘Tayo’ also known as ‘Ghostwritter’ here on nairaland and this is my short story.

I worked as a waiter also known as Bartender in one of the popular 'Rendezvous' around town, though it was a per-time job and the pay was manageable. I took up the job last month immediately after my service year, I disgust the idea of waiting or searching for a white collar job even though I wished for one “but man have got to do something to earn something” and besides, merely doing nothing could kill me.
I was on the evening duty that day so I took my time to go for a job interview in which I had gotten the invite a week earlier. I was dressed in my known ‘interview uniform’ of an ash colored fitted suit with black stripes upon my one and only black Pe’llo Italian leather shoe, I looked my best like a young corporate manager.
On my way to the interview, I boarded a taxi whose driver was a relatively aged man, I noticed he try paid more attention to the morning news on his car radio than he paid to the road as he try adjust the frequency to a clearer tone.
“….he was shot dead in his residence in the early hour of yesterday and money worth millions was chattered away by the gunmen, report has it that investigation is ongoing. The commissioner of police has……” a voice of a female newscaster announced through the car radio.
“Chai!!, Just like that!” the taxi driver exclamated as he manuovers his way through the hold-up
“That is life o, we live to die someday...may his soul rest in perfect peace” I said in my most sympathetic tone as I try show unwilling concern along with the Taxi driver.
“And who dey talk about the man himself….abi you no know who died?” he rhetorically asked as peeps to catch a glance of my stupid face through the rear mirror. I was lost as I wondered what else he expect me to know, I hesitated for a while if to ask what was up about the news I just heard or keep my mouth shut as usual, I chose the latter.
“Chai!!...three-hundred-and-twenty-million naira cash just like that!” the taxi driver suddenly murmured into my hearing as he shuffled his shoulder for effect. I decided not to ask what was wrong or show any concern to his words or action. Suddenly, the Taxi driver asked in a tone of urgency with his eyes on the rear-mirror “Broda abeg make I ask you one question, if you get opportunity to see three hundred and twenty million naira cash for ground, tell me wetin you go use am do?”
“I will immediately return it to the police station since it’s not…..” I bluntly said without even giving it a second thought.
Shockingly, before I could finish my statement, the taxi driver made a long hiss like a snake after he had turn his head to give me a ‘you-are-such-a-stupid-and-clueless-guy’ look. I felt so embraced and promised never to say a word to him till I get to my destination and so it was.

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After about an hour ride, I was at the venue slated for the interview. The crowd waiting at the premises of the firm almost made me though I had come for prayer crusade. Some many people waiting already, I was so discouraged by the mere crowd, I had hope to meet five people at most as a competitor but there I just stood staring over a hundred people also competing for just one vacancy position in an advertising firm. After waiting for about five frustrating hours, I was finally ushered in by one pretty ‘lepa shandi’ who was trying so hard to appear friendly. I walked into a room and saw two men, one in a black suit and the other in a plain white button down shirt with a thick eye spectacle resting on his nose and a woman with an all grey hair all seated and discussing on an issue, they were so engrossed in the discussion that they never even noticed I was greeting.
“Unbelievable…just like that” the man in spectacle said to the others
“in this hard economic situation, I’m very sure that large sum of money will go a very long way in solving my problems” the man in a black suit said in a deep baritone.
“I hard it’s just three of them, just three…..which mean they will have to share it about a hundred million each” the woman chipped in looking so calculative as she made three fingers in illustration.
I had already made myself comfortable on the seat opposite my suppose interviewers who seem carried away in their discussion. They kept talking about three unknown criminals who had brutally murdered a popular politician in another part of the country, but I noticed the discussion centers more on the large sum of money charted away by the murderers than even the dead politician himself.
“If you were one of them, what will you do with that large sum?” the woman asked the man in black suit
“I will travel out of the country as soon as possible and go enjoy the money with my family….no time to suffer” the man in black suit answered with such great enthusiasm in his tone.
“as for me, I will go bury the money in the bush and wait for like after a month when the whole fuse and investigation is over then I start spending smartly” the man in spectacle said boastfully like he already had the imaginary money with him. The woman commended their suggestion but said she would start travelling to Dubai to buy gold, a business she had always wished for since her childhood. At long last they noticed my presence and asked why I had sat uninstructed; I try explain, pleaded and was forgiven.
Like the devil was present, the man in black suit suddenly tries to go informal with me so as to ease the tension he noticed on me, he asked “What will you do if you suddenly come across three hundred and twenty million?”

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hmmm

Lots of uncompleted buildings... sorry I mean stories.

Boring life indeed

wen d money come dat is wen u shld ask me

Ghostwriter this story don pass 1 year nah,abeg come continue jare.