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You Are Fasting!!! - Religion - Nairaland

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You Are Fasting!!! by doughziay: 10:09am On Apr 13, 2016
Daughter: (Coughs out) Hmmm…It is well o

Mum: (looks up at her, then continues picking her beans) Any gist for momma?

Daughtersad Looks at her) Mum, I think I am not normal anymore…like, I am sick

Mum: (Chuckles) Ojo to’ju ba ri’bi ni bii’wole. Sickiii ke! Why?

Daughter: Because I am over-sensitive. Whenever I see a guy, I have this weird feeling compared to when I meet a girl. Mum, I get worried often times if I would scale through adolescence without defiling myself

Mum: (Laughs) you are afraid?

Daughter: It seems you don’t understand mum. When I see a guy’s bicep, oh my God! If he mistakenly exposes his abs, then I would almost faint, feeling as if I should run into his strong, muscular arms and be cuddled.

Mum: And so? That’s why you are not normal?

Daughter: (Eyes widens) Mum!

Mum: That shows that you are very normal my baby girl

Daughter: I don’t understand ma

Mum: You fasted recently shae?

Daughter: Yes mum. A three-day dry fast

Mum: There was on an occasion that I prepared plantain and fried egg for dinner for the family. How did you feel that day?

Daughter: Mum, it was sensational! As if I had never tasted dodo before. I wanted a bite so bad.

Mum: So, why didn’t you get into the kitchen to get yourself some?

Daughter: Mum, I was fasting

Mum: Nice one! Son, can you hear us from there? Put off the TV please

Son: Ok mum.

Mum: As an adolescent boy or girl, don’t think it weird when you are attracted to an opposite sex. His or her stature or the likes might appeal to you. It shows that you are very normal. You wouldn’t say, you are abnormal because you can perceive the aroma of dodo while you were fasting. Would you?

Both: No mum

Mum: All unmarried people in this world are on a sexual fast or at least, that’s how it was supposed to be. Different dodo, juices, fried fish, chicken; Shawarma and the likes would appeal to them clothed in handsome men and beautiful women of different carriage but block your perception! You are fasting!

Daughter: (nods repeatedly) Hmmm…I am getting it now

Mum: the aroma could be pornography, sexy boys and girls, devilish games and all but be warned, you are what?

Both: Fasting!

Mum: So my daughter, you are as normal as anything. It means all the parts of your body are responding well but the Bible says you should keep your body under!

Daughter: Mum, for real, I can’t thank you enough. I expected you to shout at me and tie your scarves round your waist, stamping your feet on the floor saying ‘Omo yi ti pa mi’ but no! You are trustworthy and I can count on you. And that is why mum is our… (Signals to the boy)

Son: Confidant! (Both laugh)

Daughter: Bro, c’mon chop knuckle (They did)

Mum: (Smiles) Blessed children…very very blessed!

Both: most blessed mother

Mum: But never forget the lesson learnt today…(expects an answer)

Both: We are fasting!

Mum: Yes. The fast would soon be over and your dish of dodo, freshly prepared with well garnished fried egg with a chill bottle of wine would be delivered to you but first, wait! Say, I will wait

Both: I will wait!

Mum: And the Lord will bless you.

Both: Amen (They hug their mother and she blesses them).

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