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Love Like A Joke - Literature - Nairaland

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Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 2:04am On Jun 13, 2016
Am not a literature student ooo...so pardon my error or grammatical blunder in my effort to entertain u...lol,as a dental technologist don't expect perfection from me in literature field.
...Enjoy

#Episode_1.-It all started like a joke...tade is my closet friend after our secondary school @wesley college of science we both registered for JAMB class in the same centre,it was all fun until a lady came to join the class as well,she was very pretty of the same height with me,light in complexion and with a cat eyes...me and tade started crushing on her the 1st day she came,after the class that same day we try our best to get her number but all our efforts prove abortive.
the next day I and tade put our best outfit with timberland boot as the reigning shoe then,we are so eager and curious to see the new jamb class member but so painful she was absent that day,for her absence alone we are unable to assimilate all we are thought that same day,we went home disappointed. Fast forward to the next day which was weekend...I rushed to finish all my house cores to avoid scolding from my no nonsense uncle_bala so after my breakfast I dressed up to hooked tade up at his street sport viewing centre cos is match day and am proudly arsenal fan while tade is chelsea and the both team are playing against eachother that saturday...meeting tade at the viewing centre we started discussing which is focus on the new girl in our jamb class in which we are yet to know her name,but the first issue we have is who to go for her,..though tade saw her 1st b4 me but who know like better thing so I summoned courage and dragged with tade that the girl is my taste but I trust tade that he won't buy that and this argument and dragging go till end of the match which was won by chelsea with help of the referee...on our way home something tragedy happened,i was hit by a reckless bikeman in which I sustained injury on my right leg and is abit deep...
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 2:10am On Jun 13, 2016
#Episode_2.-Before I could open eyes I found myself lying helplessly on the hospital bed and uncle Bala,tade and one strange man which later introduced himself as the doctor.

My right leg was hanged,I heard the doctor saying that I will be admitted for Atleast 5days to get over the trauma...I shouted no,that I can't stay there for 5days without going to jamb class,all my uncle thought was that am real concern about not missing jamb lesson but my own point is about tade having the lady due to my absence but uncle Bala stick to the doctor order so I accept my fate and l look straight into tade's eyes and saw him smiling with style,feel like killing him that moment...a nurse later gave me injection and I slept off without knowing it.
So the next morning I woke to a breakfast of moin moin and pap not my favourite though but that's what my condition deserve that moment,after I tried to make some calls to tade and my uncle but it seem the network is bad and non of the 2 checked on me except aunty jumain(my uncle's wife) we gisted until the nurse with the sleeping injection came,i don't like the nurse cos she hardly smile and her injection do knocked me off
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 2:24am On Jun 13, 2016
#Episode_3.-On monday morning,my mind was at the jamb lesson centre,not at the hospital at all...was just concerned about what will tade put on as outfit or will he sneaked out with his dad's camry to show_off to the new girl...this is doom,tade is having his way,i was like God make tade sick through_out the 5days I will be spending in this hell called hospital,this all I was thinking when the doctor show up and told me that he will send a nurse to me to attend to my injection and I fired back with anger that I don't like the black nurse that used to give me the injection,he asked me why and I told him the black nurse hardly smile...and the doctor smile back and he promised to see to that,he walked out and closed the door.

After an hour somebody tapped me on my right arm but I was too weak to see the figure clearly,i struggled to open my eyes more wider and behold I can't believe my view,am I in jamb class or hospital cos the nurse am seeing beside me is the same jamb class girl,so surprised...she said hi with bright smile that melt my soul unlike the black nurse with the sleeping injection...
My first question to her was hello,is tade that told u am here?...and she said who is tade?have we met before?I quickly lied that i don't know what I was saying and she said she thought as much,without wasting time I asked her who she is?..and she told me she was the new nurse assigned to me due to my complained over the former black nurse,she further explained that she has to skipped her jamb class when her dad(doctor) told her to stay back to attend to him and I told her have seen her once at the jamb class inside bodija estate that am also a student there...nice meeting u,am tokunbo and she told me she's halima and later told me to turn back for injection to be sincere her own injection was so warm...and I slept off like a baby...

I woke_up after 4pm that same day and saw angry face of tade beside me and asked him why he look so sad and told me his ordeal that day about how he sneaked out his dad's car and bought black-market fuel @sabo @the rate of #250 per litre,just to woo that foreign witch but the witch is absent again...I burst into laughter without listening to him again,he was surprised to see me laughing in that manner,his thought was that maybe the accident has affected my brain or something...I stopped laughing when he made attempt to call the doctor's attention,i called him back and told him that the lady is here with me as a nurse and she's the one taking care of me since morning,..tade look so surprised without believing me and I told him to calm down
Re: Love Like A Joke by kongru(m): 5:03am On Jun 13, 2016
carry on

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Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 1:09pm On Jun 13, 2016
#Episode_4.-Tade was like tokunbo u are so lucky to be the victim of that accident,he even said,i wish I was in your shoe,smiles tade is such a bad boy...the most funny part of it is that tade now turn to be my companion in the hospital now, to the extend that I wonder who is sick between me and him...on my own side too am enjoying my sickness as long as halima is my nurse but on wednesday something strange happened,

halima look so sad and I was also so worried about it,i tried to ask her but she snubbed me...after an hour I called her and told her I will be needing another nurse cos I can't stand a sad nurse giving me injection and she pleaded that I shouldn't report that to her dad that she will change,and I insisted that I wish to know what makes her sad...she breathed down heavily and told me is all about her boyfriend,asked her what happen to her boyfriend and she told me that her boyfriend impregnated his neighbour and she don't think she can continue with that relationship cos she feel insecure in the relationship right now...

she was about crying when explaining the issue so I pulled her to my side and consoled her to be patience that everything will be alright with time and wiped her tears with my shirt,..hmmm,how romantic,tade burst into us without knocking and met us in that romantic mood,on seeing tade ,halima quickly composed herself and walked out to the nurse station.
I now feel like real MVP but I know deep inside me that tade is real hurt and he asked with anger when I will be discharge,i told him tomorrow morning but I don't think am good to go home...and he shouted back at me with anger that tokunbo u are good to go,dont be trapped in this hospital's love drama and let's go home bla bla bla...I was just looking at him without saying a word cos I know his talking out of jealousness,in between that halima came in and told tade that is voice is too loud for the environment and with that,tade bounced out and slammed the door behind,i tried to called him back but is too angry to answer me...halima later asked me what happen between me and my friend,but I was so ashamed to speak the truth so I lied,..I was discharged the next day,on getting home my uncle warned me never to operate my phone while walking on main road cos that's truly what led to the accident and I promised him to be more careful and aunty jumain brought us kunun and groundnut.
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 1:13pm On Jun 13, 2016
‎‎
‎#Episode_5.-That night before bed,i started convo with halima via BBM and our conversation go like this.                                                                                                 Me: hi pretty nurse.                                Halima: evening mr tokunbo‎
‎Me: how is work?                           
Halima: good,and your leg hope is ok now?     Me: yep,so much better,i can kick ball with it now.        
Halima: lol,you are funny better don't try that...‎
Me: ok ooo.
Halima: thanks for the courageous advice,u are a wonderful patient‎.
Me: you always welcome,between you are also wonderful nurse as well.
Halima:  smiles
Me:what makes you think am wonderful patient?
Halima: just that I was relieved after you consoled me with those words,those words are so soothing ,but
Me: but what?
Halima: hmmm...I dislike lieing ‎patient.
Me: but I never lies to you about anything.
Halima: stop it,i heard your friend nagging about hospital's love ‎drama
Me: so?
Halima: and when I asked,you lied is about arsenal and chelsea match issue
Me: hmmmm...am sorry,just that I think is too early to tell ‎you such shit
Halima: i insist,tell me what's the quarrel about?
Me: ‎hmmmm...ok if u insist,the truth is that me and my friend has be‎en crushing on u since 1st time we saw u @hope jamb class in bodija estate...
Halima: and so?
Me: and so,he felt jealous seeing me having you.
Halima: shit...what  do u mean by‎ having me?
Me: em emm...take it easy halima,u know am not yet strong for this‎.
Halima: u hurt me more for lieing to your friend about having me,no wonder the poor boy left the hospital with anger and slammed the door in that manner
Me: but...halima...
Halima: just free me...bye
Me: halima
Me: halima
Me: reply your message now
Me: but not what u think shaa.
Me: goodnight‎
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 1:16pm On Jun 13, 2016
#Episode_6.-‎ I felt so bad after the chat and was unable to sleep but later slept_off and dream of me as bestman for tade and halima as the bride in an elaborated wedding...that's the dream I had before I woke up next morning,so with that dream I decide to let go halima...Aunty jumain brought my breakfast of rice with fish stew and pineapple juice after the breakfast I make a deal with aunty jumain to give me the key to her husband second car...yep! She agreed and off I went straight to tade's house and I met her mum @the door and I was told tade not around,that sad though,from there I went straight to halima's hospital but I met her absent and I was welcomed by the black nurse,without saying a word I quickly turn back zoomed off back home,what a bad day...the issue is really worrying me so I keep trying tade's number but his not picking it up,then I tried halima's number as well and not picking it as well...the most painful thing is that I couldn't get halima and lost my bestfriend in the process...aunty jumain notice this and asked me what happen and I just have to confess to her cos I can't hold it to myself.
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 1:26pm On Jun 13, 2016
#Episode_7.- the next day was monday so I dress_up for jamb class though still scared to face halima but am hopeful that tade will forgive me,on getting to the class,the first person I met is tade and he tried to snubbed me but I held him back and he noticed the friendship desire in me and and he hugged me without stress...from there we rekindle our friendship again and move on...halima show up to class later that day and more pretty today but I try hard to control my emotion not to hurt my friend...tade later asked me why am not talking to halima and told him everything that happened between us though he felt abit sorry for me...

Throughout that week i,tade and halima was punctual at the jamb class but something strange and funny happened on friday,tade received a text from halima,asking tade to see her after the class...when tade shown me the text we are both confused cos tade never gave his phone number out to halima,how come she has tade's number...though tade decided not to honour the invitation but I forced him to go,so they met after the class under the mango tree while I walked home all alone with little jealousness  ‎and pain...on getting home aunty jumain is trying to serve me her usual kunun but have lost appetite due to the scene of seeing halima and tade togeda and related it to my strange dream,this baffled me a lot so I took shower and relaxed to my room as my only comfort zone that moment,later that evening I tried to put call across to tade to hear the full gist of what happen but his line is switch_off...shit! I was over curious and desperate to hear what halima want to disclose to him.
        The next day I was fortunate to go class with my uncle's corola sport,it makes me feel like don whn am in it‎,after I parked under the tree tade join me hailing me from a distant,on getting to my side I quickly ask him what I halima discussed with him yestaday but I was surprised that tade was just smiling without saying a word and advice me to just free the poor girl,with this,my mood changed but I never show it to tade.
        So we get into the class for physics class and to my surprised again halima sat closely to tade even holding his hand while they gist about blues music without minding the physics teacher.."feel like crying this moment cos I felt like a loser
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 3:35pm On Jun 13, 2016
Pls comment to encourage the poor boy,.. smileylol
Re: Love Like A Joke by kongru(m): 4:38pm On Jun 13, 2016
Carry On
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 8:11pm On Jun 13, 2016
#Episode 8:_on getting home that evening,i was not in good moon so with that I avoid aunty jumain and her kunun,took shower and went straight into my room as the only comfort zone I have that moment.‎
                     I slept_off in no time,later woke up very late that night with slight headache,I noticed my phone notification light blinking,I checked‎ and it was a message from one of ex greeting me via bbm I ignored the ping due to my mood,with that I notice a guy pix on halima's DP,i quickly enlarge it and lo and behold is tade my friend's pix..."I don die"this is too much for me to bear in a day,to be sincere I weep inside that night even slept without dinner.
          The next morning I summoned courage and sent halima I sadden message...hi halima,try put yourself in my shoe before hurting me,i wrote this message with deep pain in my heart and I wish we never met cos I lose my happiness,appetite and bestfriend since we met...thanks tokunbo.
     I received an SMS ‎the next minute,i rushed to my phone hoping is halima's reply to my previous text but is stupid glo messages...shiorr...I took my bath and dressed up like a guy on date,grabbed the key to corola sport...straight to bubbles bar to cool off, on getting there I choosed a cool corner which I can view the whole bar from there,i order a bottle of voldka with one camberi youghourt,mixed the stuff up and started sipping it,with that I saw a pretty lady hiing me from a distant I just smile back and wave her to come over,in no time we started gisting like old friends...to my surprise she ordered another bottle of voldka on her account...wow!!! Though am still loaded so I order assorted meat with more youghourt,this what we did till 10pm and I decided to drop her @home but u won't believe this babe came in venza..so with that will exchange number and bad her bye bye
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 8:13pm On Jun 13, 2016
#Episode_9:- My uncle is patiently waiting at the door...on sighting me,he started nagging,i just walked past without uttering a word,"me that am already drunk_lol"‎
     I relaxed to my comfort zone and locked the door behind but still hearing uncle Bala nagging and his wife is pleading on my behalf.
    I woke early next day with hang_over,the first thing I check is my cellphone with 7 miss calls, can't believe my eyes all the miss calls is from tade and halima...I nearly call back but later change my mind cos have decided to keep distance from them to save myself from heartbreak cos am very emotional.
   Shit...have forgotten what I stored the girl I met @the bubbles lastnight number‎ with...oh my God,i feel like killing somebody for that.
 I went straight to the bubbles that evening but nobody look like her...I was confused,i tried to describe her to the bar_man but all my effort to get her prove abortive so I let go.
    On monday morning,headed to jamb class as a new man without friend or crush to distract me,i saw the two loverbirds(tade&halima) under the tree,i ignored them and enter the class,i guess guilty conscience  don't let tade to greet me...during chmistry class my phone rang and lo and behold the caller ID is fadake bubbles...wowo!..now I get it,thats the voldka's lady number,i took excuse from the teacher and went out to received the call.
 ...the call convo
 Fadeke:-hello buddy
 
Me:-sup pretty

Fadake:-expecting your call since

Me:-mabinu dear,kind of busy 

Fadeke:-where Thou at?

Me:-at the jamb class,dear

Fadeke:- lol,funny

Me:-what?

Fadeke: calling me dear,though sound cool,do u car we see?
Me:-now?

Fadeke:-sure

Me:-location?

Fadeke:-where you are should be the location.

Me:-then come straight to bodija estate and ask of hope alive jamb tutorial class,i will be waiting @the gate

Fadeke:-alright,10min

M:-ok 
 ...hung up
Get back inside the class and started spying outside for Fadeke arrival,not quite long I saw a range sport driving toward the schoolgate...wow! Can this be she‎? Nay,this is too much for her and as I look further I saw her stepping out of the range sport with yeezy sneakers and denim over denim,..am I dreaming,she called me to announce her arrival
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 8:15pm On Jun 13, 2016
#Episode 10_: that's how fadeke came into my world without me knowing it,within a week I was already so into her that we hardly do without seeing eachother in a day.
   
           Tutu is part of jamb class and she's having her birthday this weekend and I invited fadeke so it was deal between me and her to nail it.
           Fast forward to Saturday morning of tutu's birthday,i woke up so early to prepare my self for the challenge against my childhood friend(tade) so I put a call across to fadeke and she told me she's ready,i asked her to pick me @mokola roundabout.
          We are together in the next 10minutes inside her dad's range sport heading to the birthday,on getting there..the bash is already full.
     I saw halima and tade in the same outfit...lol...but when i and fadeke step into the avenue it was standing ovation,to nail it all..tutu,ushered us to VIP corner and trust my babe she quickly order for full casket...so the popping started...you need to see me looking dapper like dope king and my babe even complimented my status.
     For almost 2hrs all eyes is on me and my babe,..halima can't bear the hit and she stormed_out the bash leaving tade behind.
     On seeing this I repackage my strategy and other more drinks to poh
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 8:24pm On Jun 13, 2016
#Episode 11:_ it was almost 10:30pm so I tapped fadeke to let's move and she obliged,on our way out tade blocked my way and asked with shaking voice if am happy now after oppressing ‎halima out of the birthday bash,though I was badly angry hearing that but I try hard to control my temper...thanks for fadeke that pulled me away from that scene.
     So she dropped me @my house gate,i kissed her and went inside but was unable to sleep due to tade's shaking voice,pitied him cos I love tade as my real blood and I can't stand seeing him hurt,i wept secretly for him before sleeping that night so I decided to call him the next morning.

    The next morning,i texted tade to let's see and he replied me to nevermind that halima won't like that...shit,tade is a fool,with that statement I deleted his number from my phone.‎
Re: Love Like A Joke by Feyikemi12(f): 8:48pm On Jun 13, 2016
Halima has problem o


BTW are u an ex wesleyan sir?

more mb to ur phone

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Re: Love Like A Joke by DannyJ19(m): 9:00pm On Jun 13, 2016
Nxt.. Loving dis Tory

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Re: Love Like A Joke by kenecaleb: 10:10pm On Jun 13, 2016
Nice 1 dear.

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Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 11:00pm On Jun 13, 2016
Feyikemi12:
Halima has problem o



BTW are u an ex wesleyan sir?


more mb to ur phone
yes am wesleyan@ibadan
Re: Love Like A Joke by Feyikemi12(f): 8:48am On Jun 14, 2016
ibukun147:
yes am wesleyan@ibadan
I'm an ex-wesleyan too













but you're our fore-seniors (if there's anything like that)
Re: Love Like A Joke by orimsamsam(m): 9:38am On Jun 14, 2016
Feyikemi12:
I'm an ex-wesleyan too



Me self. Na ex Wesleyan













but you're our fore-seniors (if there's anything like that)
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 3:59pm On Jun 14, 2016
Feyikemi12:
I'm an ex-wesleyan too


Yep...2004 set









but you're our fore-seniors (if there's anything like that)
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 4:03pm On Jun 14, 2016
#Episode11:_Later that day I received a call from doctor badru(halima's daddy) asking me to come over for discussion so I honoured the invitation and go over immediately.
         On getting there I met halima on a sick bed with drip fixed to her hand before I could say a word to her Dr badru ushered me into his office and we settled for the discussion.
         Tokunbo why are u so harsh to halima cos she reported to me that since u left the hospital that u have been very harsh to her even when she greeted u @her friend's birthday bash,u shunned her off and molest her by pouring drinks on her so I want to ask u if that's the reward halima deserve for skipping jamb's class to takecare of u while u are admitted here as patient...hmmm?
        Hmmmmm...this allegations sound very strange and funny to me cos I never remember doing any of what I was accused for...I asked her dad if halima can confront me with those allegations cos am not guilty of any of it.
       The Dr later released me to go so when I got home,i notice a sad smiley on her BBM status,..though I still have an atom of feeling for her so with that I ping her...
   
Me:-halima sup

Halima:-tokunbo I love u

Me:- (surprised)love me?

Halima:-tokunbo,i can't keep this to myself again,all am doing with tade is just a show_off to find out maybe u will get jealous if u truly love‎ me

Me:-but...emm

Halima:-dont say but,i will fight to have u back from fadeke...pls just give me the trial to do that

Me:-halima,is like my battery is flat,so let's see to discuss this issue.

Halima:-ok,that's ok by me...so should I come over?

Me:-but what about tade?

Halima:-tade will be fine

Me:-ok will see by evening then.

Halima:-alright...love you tokunbo

Me:-thanks halima,bye
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 4:05pm On Jun 14, 2016
#Episode11:_Later that day I received a call from doctor badru(halima's daddy) asking me to come over for discussion so I honoured the invitation and go over immediately.
         On getting there I met halima on a sick bed with drip fixed to her hand before I could say a word to her Dr badru ushered me into his office and we settled for the discussion.
         Tokunbo why are u so harsh to halima cos she reported to me that since u left the hospital that u have been very harsh to her even when she greeted u @her friend's birthday bash,u shunned her off and molest her by pouring drinks on her so I want to ask u if that's the reward halima deserve for skipping jamb's class to takecare of u while u are admitted here as patient...hmmm?
        Hmmmmm...this allegations sound very strange and funny to me cos I never remember doing any of what I was accused for...I asked her dad if halima can confront me with those allegations cos am not guilty of any of it.
       The Dr later released me to go so when I got home,i notice a sad smiley on her BBM status,..though I still have an atom of feeling for her so with that I ping her...
   
Me:-halima sup

Halima:-tokunbo I love u

Me:- (surprised)love me?

Halima:-tokunbo,i can't keep this to myself again,all am doing with tade is just a show_off to find out maybe u will get jealous if u truly love‎ me

Me:-but...emm

Halima:-dont say but,i will fight to have u back from fadeke...pls just give me the trial to do that

Me:-halima,is like my battery is flat,so let's see to discuss this issue.

Halima:-ok,that's ok by me...so should I come over?

Me:-but what about tade?

Halima:-tade will be fine

Me:-ok will see by evening then.

Halima:-alright...love you tokunbo

Me:-thanks halima,bye
Re: Love Like A Joke by ibukun147(m): 4:07pm On Jun 14, 2016

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Marked By Misfortune (ongoing Novel) / *deleted* / The Effects Of Domestic Violence On Women.

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