Xyz

boohema:


However this guy, I would say is the best man I av ever met in ma life. He has a good heart, hez God fearing, open minded and extremely caring. I love him so much but I think he loves me more. If only he wasn't younger or not ready to settle down. We are both done with school and all, he has very great prospects. Hez super intelligent with excellent academic records which I find very attractive in men.

Hmmm

So what you are saying is that he is just perfect. You find no flaw in the guy? Sorry, but this sounds like Infatuation/Fresh love syndrome to me.

Men dont change. He's not the issue.
However women change a lot after marriage. This one you're already having serious issues with his age, are u sure u can cope with that for the rest of your life? Its not the norm for women to marry men older than them, althoughit happens and some of them even live happiky ever after. But are you sure your temperament is that which can ignore or withstand the looks and remarks and challenges of the future? Do you get easily swayed by other people's opinions? In ten years time when he says he feels you look down on him because yoy are older, will you be able to handle it in a mature way without flying off the handle?

Think about it.

At 25 and people say there's no time on your side? People will never get tired of saying!
Stop getting worried or living your life based on what people say or think.The point should be if you are ready for marriage at 25.Marriage has got nothing to do with age but when one is ready-emotionally,financially and all that.

You are worried that your b/f is a year younger than you;that should not worry you.If you have no problem dating him,then find out how he feels about your one year gap..a year is not a big deal.

He is ambitious and has prospect,though presently he is not financially able.Give it time,he's going somewhere.

Both of you connect so well.Relationships/marriage is all about how you are connected to each other.He makes you happy;that's what every woman wants.Someone who makes them happy...Don't end up with someone who you are not connected to cos he asked to marry you.

The day is still young.Find your passion in life and follow it,build and develop yourself.Your happiness is in your hands.Don't let people's opinion sabotage your life.

You are 25. Even if you were 35, I wouldn't advise you to marry someone who is not right (e.g. cheater) or who you don't connect with. Why would you give up a beautiful relationship to get married to someone who will make your life miserable? Because society says so? How happy and successful are the people telling you that at 25 time is not on your side? Remember, misery loves company.

I won't tell you to wait for your boyfriend either because there is no guarantee that he will marry you eventually but I will tell you to enjoy the relationship and appreciate this man who is - as you say - perfect. You have more than millions married folks do. Do you know the number of married people who are enduring instead of enjoying their marriage because society told them that they must get married? Do you know the number of people who resent their spouses? No? Then read the threads on NL family section. Also consider the rising divorce numbers.

Appreciate what you have instead of lamenting over what you don't. You are a lucky girl and it's a pity you don't see it.

Thank you all for ur contributions!

My dear, let me ask you, what will you do if the guy tells you that you are too old for him in may be 3-4yrs time?
You have to call a spade a spade, you just have to move ahead. It will be painful but that's the best for both of you. Not that I have not seen guys marry older ladies but it's one in many cases.
The guy loves you & you love him but like they say "love is not always enough". What if you get a job before him? Can you finance your marriage with him? Or can you really submit to him and be under his control?
As a sister, I will advice you look at other options and end the relationship.

In my own opinion, you should enjoy your present relationship. From your write up its obvious both of you love each other, When it comes to marriage, love isn't enough quite alright however, it's the foundation upon which every other thing is laid.

Don't get distracted or carried away by few 'unserious' guys coming your way or guys that are not your kind of person sort of.

At 25, you still have a little bit of time on your side give your current guy some time and watch his body language, see if he's ready to settle down say before you clock 28.

In relationship matters, never jump from known to unknown without the right justification, there might be disastrous implications.

I wish you the best.

,

...who's on duty here? And why is there a struggle with 101 stuff .

Boohema, this is relatively straight forward.

Are you right and ready for marriage? I see you nodding vigorously .
If you are, sImply tell your boo. After a year, you have the right to ascertain specifics.

Ask him if he will commit to marrying you. If he says no, walk.
If yes, then ask him when.

If it's too long walk, or tell him it's not acceptable.
You then tell him what is. If he agrees, fine, If not walk.

Ensure you are happy with the timeframe you specify or negotiate.

No regrets. All the best.


TV

However this guy, I would say is the best man I av ever met in ma life. He has a good heart, hez God fearing, open minded and extremely caring. I love him so much but I think he loves me more. If only he wasn't younger or not ready to settle down. We are both done with school and all, he has very great prospects. Hez super intelligent with excellent academic records which I find very attractive in men.

Why is he not ready to settle down?No job?You love him and he loves you more? Why can't you guys sit down,detach emotions and plot the feasibility of you guys saying I do in the shortest time possible? There ought to be genuine disciplined commitment from the both of you.

If you guys really love each other,you guys should work together to outwit all obstacles as given.The decisions you make in regards marriage will determine how happy you lead the rest of your life. The realms must be consulted to make sure all things aligns perfectly.


Wishing you all the very best.