IT'S MY FAULT

If couples will learn to stop blaming each other and take 100% responsibilities for their successes and failures in life, all marriages will be heaven on earth and there will be no single case of divorce recorded any where on earth!

Irresponsibility is the leading cause of divorce world -wide. You screamed at your husband not because he abused you really but because you have issues with anger. No matter how angry you are with a mad man with a sharp machete in hand, you will never challenged him to a duel, your anger automatically cools and you become rational immediately! That is a sign you can control your anger! You were mad at your husband not because of what he did really but because you lack control over your emotions, you lack self control. You lack, the ability to act rational in the face of pressure. Anger does not solve any problem, it only compounds it. Face this truth, deal with your personal issues and accept responsibility for your failures.

You had an affair with that lady not because your wife starves you sex really, you had the affair because you have issues with lust. You do not know how to make your wife enjoy sex with you, you do not love her enough, you lack good communication skill in your marriage. You are selfish. You think about your needs first at the detriment of others'need. You damned the consequence of your decision, went right ahead to have multiple sex partners and chose to break your wife's heart to pieces. Face this reality: you are immature, selfish and lack self control. Mature men deal with their issues, not run into the arms of another woman. Great husbands are not cowards!

Enough of blame shifting! Enough of malice! Enough of all these fight! Enough of domestic violence! Enough of scandal, separation and divorce! Let's all learn to deal with our personal issues before it is too late. Let us stop blaming our spouses for our personal problems! Let us all learn to be humble. Swallow your pride! Learn to ask for forgiveness whenever you go wrong. Learn to say,"honey, it's my fault, I shouldn't have spoken to you that way". Stop the affair sir. Put your arms around your wife and say sincerely, "Honey, I was selfish and lack self control, please forgive me. I will do anything in my power to make this marriage work henceforth." Put your phone on speaker, call your mistress and tell her it's over, you are working on your marriage henceforth. Apologize sincerely to your wife and turn a new leaf.

Humble yourself ma. Tell yourself the truth. You have personal issues and you are dumping your emotions on your spouse. Ask for forgiveness. You really need to repent from your attitude. You were rude, proud, arrogant, saucy, abusive, critical, judgmental and harsh not because of what they did really but because that is who you are and you need to deal with it.

Oh, how will it be if every husband can be humble to their wives? How beautiful will it be if all wives will be humble towards their husbands?

How sweet will it be if we all accept responsibility for our failures and short comings and stop blaming our spouses for our bad attitude and ill manner, it will be heaven on earth.

Your marriage can take a new turn today. Please, show this to your spouse. Share it to their timeline. Copy along with © Seun Oladele, 2017 and send to them on whatsapp. Sit your spouse down tonight. Let them tell you things you have done that hurt them that you are not even aware of. Tell them ways they have really hurt you too..."confess your sins to one another and pray for one another...." (James 5:16). Hug, kiss and make up.

Your marriage will not fail in Jesus name. I love you so much. God bless you, cheers!
©Seun Oladele, 2017.
www.askseunoladele..com

Lovely piece.. when I started reading the 1st paragraph, I thought to myself; "another woman bashing thread" but reading further, I was wrong. Your write up is well balanced.
I'm of the opinion that this life is very simple... We humans just tend to complicate it. discernment, humility and respect is key is whatever dealings we find ourselves.. especially the marriage institution.., is not something we walk into with pride. Living with oneself can be something, imagine having to stay with someone for the rest of your life? It takes God, Humility, and respect.. (yeah, I purposely didn't mention love because when you have humility and respect, love subconsciously sets it. ) I'm not underestimating the power of love.
Admitting to your partner when you are wrong in marriage goes a long way.... this is a union of happiness, ignoring each other or wanting to show superiority muscles will only damage the happiness you are meant to be enjoying.. I just hope married couples learn these things

Very heartwarming to read this ...I'm in bed with my lovely wife and I'm gonna hold her tight and squeeze her and what comes after is left to your imagination OP. Thanks, married guys the ball is in your court!