Hello people

I was just wondering, in your opinion, what is the ideal number of children and the ideal age gap between them?

My hubby and I are thinking about 3 kids with around 3yrs gap between each, What about you?

The spacing u are planning is okay IMO. My first child will be 8 jan next year and my baby is 3 she will be 4 dec. Good child spacing gives your body time to heal after childbirth and it also gives you time to take care of yourself before u get pregnant again.

If possible rush 7 kids in a space of 8 years, then you can sit back and train them. What's the need of procrastinating with child birth. Don't leave for tomorrow what you can do today.

@Miss_Ife  it depends on how stable you are both financially and health wise. If you think you can cater for the family by having kids at the space of 2yrs or 18months it is left to you.

I have 3 kids and they came within the space of 8yrs. The number of kids still depends on the wish of the couples. Nigeria Government advise maximum of 4 kids irrespective of the Gender. Many couples are engrossed in Gender discrimnation in the family and this has increase the number of children not planned in a home.

@bece: yes, I like the idea of having some "peace" between babies. The first one is a year and a half now and I breastfed for over a yr, so one more year to recover (and sleep at night   ) won't be too much before number 2

@invisible : right, and you'll wire us money monthly to feed the family  

@Big man: yes, finances are important too, I have to admit that physically I [i]could [/i]have kids closer together, but we started our marriage over 2 yrs ago with nothing, and it's been hard as the 1st baby was not planned so early. Originally, I wanted to wait more and then have them all one after the other, But now that I've experienced what motherhood is, I think waiting in between is best

Also, I am still working full time and don't plan on staying at home, so time is needed between pregnancies to keep my career going,


But hey, I'm telling you guys all about me, the post was about your own choices too Big Man, what made you and your wife plan to have children the way you did?

@Miss_Ife, we have our first kid when we could not afford a can of Bournvita. She moved from milk to eating Garri. Even the garri most times on one or two square meal a day. We had to wait till 5yrs before the second one. This was because we wanted to avoid a repeat of the first experience. Only little could things improved. But the last one came 3yrs latter when things became much better.

It is always advisable to consider ones financial status when making babies.

15 kids with 10 years spacing . . .

3 kids.

Between the 1st and 2nd - 3 Years gap
Between the 2nd and last - 5-6 Years gap.

I like the idea of giving enof gap btw kids.
But I guess it also depends on ur age.
If u got married quite early,then u h 1ave all the time,but if u are among those who got married much later u have to consider ur age,bearing in mind that age is an impt factor in child bearing.

3kids with 2 years spacing.

Miss_Ife:

Hello people

I was just wondering, in your opinion, what is the ideal number of children and the ideal age gap between them?

My hubby and I are thinking about 3 kids with around 3yrs gap between each, What about you?

2 yrs gap

@post

At the age your kids are able to do basic stuff by themselves, and when they're able to understand what you tell them.

Yea, like 2-3.

At that age, the kid will even be able to help you with the new baby

I see many of us like giving gaps between kids

At first it was my husband's idea, but once again I realize he was right . I think 2/3 yrs gap would be just fine, I'd have time to do what I wanna do professionnally by then, save up more money, and the 1st one would be more independent (I don't want to take care of 2 babies'diapers at once, or wake up at night for 2 babies, unless I have twins).

I am still young, so even with such gap I could have 3 kids before I turn 30.

It's funny most of you have a minimum of 2/3 yrs gap between your children, most of the people I know have kids quickly one after the other, maybe because the ladies wait more to have the 1st one (after 30)

I think it is better to just rush them and then relax later

I heard if women rush childbearing like 3 kids in 5 years, they look much younger than their age when they grow older. Also women that give too much space (3yrs and above) age quickly. Is it true?

I heard if women rush childbearing like 3 kids in 5 years, they look much younger than their age when they grow older. Also women that give too much space (3yrs and above) age quickly. Is it true?

It's strange, I would say it's the opposite, Imagine what the body goes through after one pregnancy and breastfeeding one baby + all the care the baby needs (no sleep, being active all day, ). I can't imagine that having 3 babies in a row would make someone look younger, Maybe they [i]look [/i]younger because they [i]are [/i]younger (you see them with 3 kids so believe they are old and look young when actually they are still young)

@Fhemmy: you're a man, right? 

Just kidding, but imagine, having 3 kids, close together. before the last one turns 2 and the mom is done with diapers, sleepless nights, breastfeeding and all,  it's been about 8 years (starting from the 1st pregnancy) that she hasn't really been herself. Cause once we have kids, we know that we are not really ourselves during pregnancy & the 1st yr of a child (at least). It is very challenging physically, emotionally, financially,  And all this could also be difficult to handle for the man and for the couple.

How can a couple have time together, satisfying intimacy and rest during this 8 yrs marathon?

Mind you, I'm not saying it's bad, I know friends who did it (they actually had 4 kids in 6yrs) and are very happy as a couple and as a family,  but I know I couldn't do it. I can't do everything at once, it's too demanding!

@post

At the age your kids are able to do basic stuff by themselves, and when they're able to understand what you tell them.

Yea, like 2-3.

At that age, the kid will even be able to help you with the new baby

A 2 or 3 year old can't help with a new baby, they're still babies themselves.

tpia6:



A 2 or 3 year old can't help with a new baby, they're still babies themselves.

You may be wrong. My daughter is just over 2 years, and am expecting another baby in less than 6 months. My daughter can help with the baby in some ways, like bring baby's diapers, bring baby's socks etc, even I can tell her to sit with baby or play with baby. 1-3 years children are called toddlers, they are no longer babies (oyinbo no go kill me with different names self)

As for me, 2 beautiful, smart and God-given children is more than enough to make me a Happy mother forever. 2 is enough for me, economy no dey smile, school fee no dey joke, chocolates and also menu menu dey consume person money, lol