MY BREAKUPS 18+


-Episode 1


"The very moment I set my eyes on you, I fell in love with you. Franka, will you be my girlfriend?" I heard a voice behind me,
I turned and saw a girl and a boy sitting on the table, probably having a date.
I chuckled and grinned when I reflect on my previous relationships.

"Yes, yes, I'll be your girlfriend" the girl replied half-screaming behind me, I didn't bother to turn to check the drama that was going on because I was once a champion in such dramas.
I tapped the wedding ring in my pocket, and smiled inwardly.

I reminisced on my previous relationships that met with sudden breakups, I doubt if there is anything as love as first sight. It began with lust and grows to be love, no one should deceive anybody. And when the love diminished, understanding will keep the relationship or whatever going, and if there is no understanding everything ends there.

Born into the family of eleven, I know you are wondering if it is a polygamous family. Well it isn't, my father and my mother gave birth to everyone of us. Many of you are already calling him a sharp-shooter with quality semen, it was God's blessings all along. May Allah be praised, my mother a blessed woman for giving birth to almost the tribe of Israel single-handedly.

My position in the family is a controversial one, due to the fact that my twin was birthed after an hour I was given birth to. Until this time, he still sees me as his mate. I didn't blame him in anyway, Calabar twin mythology has it that, he is the older one who sent me to the world to be his forerunner, and announce his coming.

Life itself is a mystery, that is why Immanuel Kant said we can't understand the world itself, and Hick revealed that our explanation of the world is how it present itself to us. Wittgenstein utterly said that we can never understand the world because God holds the key to our understanding, I'll neither counter the belief of the Efik because they have reason for their sage to posit such belief.

I was always giving the compliment of the younger one due to my physique compared to my twin brother, I don't blame them after all I look younger and lack muscles. Even my place of birth is met with controversies, as many people calls me Hausa, and some said am from Delta, few sees me as someone from Yoruba.

As God has it, am from Rivers state and the riverine blood runs in me. Well, starting with my first girlfriend, I didn't actually asked her to be my girlfriend because I was too young and hardly will you see people boast of having girlfriends, around 2002 to 2009. It was utterly seen as an abomination, everything concerning sex is done secretly.

Nigeria movies hardly engage in romance then, the extend they could is just peck. And when they want to cheat on their wives, you will only see them pecking each other in the screen. Then, Ghana movies were the bad ones that shows the girl pulling her dress and pant, the rest will become history.
And there was nothing like porn in my locality at this time.

When we were old enough, I and my twin brother was enrolled in a nursery school then, in one of the best private school in town of Ahoada then. We became a handful to handle, as we practice karate more than watching, that was when the practice of Buddhism was brought to the public knowledge through Chinese karate movies, so it was really popular and my older brother is a big fan of them.

We were the kids scaring other kids of our age, as we attacked and beat up kids that tend to cross our path. We were the kids that your mommy warns you about, and whenever we are caught I was always pitied because of my looks, I look like someone who can't even hurt flies and I didn't fail to demonstrate my fear for canes.

At the end, my twin brother takes some of my punishment. I thank God for the nice partnership, victory you are loved. The term ended without any major encounter except beating up male kids like us, i returned home with third position and I wondered if it was actually my position. Because I was ranked amongst the unserious kids in the school.

I hate Sundays, because Sunday were the days my parents are always at home. We will be kept in our room to read, I and my brother engage more on drawings than reading, and we frequent the bathroom to pee.
I just know our bladders don't encourage reading.

The new term started with a new kid whose name is Sandra, yes Sandra. A very quiet young girl, she doesn't have a friend and always seen alone with sweets.
The very moment, I was attracted to her but shy as I was, couldn't get close.

One of those days, I lost trace of my younger brother and in quest of him. I met Sandra sitting at the back of the school building alone "are you looking for your twin brother?" she asked, that was what brought two of us together.
With Sandra no lack of sweets, she always makes it available. I don't know the source and I barely care about the source of it, I only enjoyed it.

Sandra and I didn't do much, but we are always find touching each other in our nether, and I wonder why her hands always get to my pee while we are in the class.
My little el will be nodding in appreciation as her hand roamed around my short, I didn't fail to reciprocate.

In no time I was unlawfully wedded to Sandra by the mouths of the teachers and the pupils, then the habit of matching couples was rampant and harmless.
Sandra and I didn't actually breakup, what happened then was that, my twin and I followed her home one of those days when my older brothers forget that they have kids in nursery school to bring home.

We went to Sandra's house, and her mother who only gave birth to her took us as her children and took care of us by bathing and feeding us well with Sandra, God bless that woman for the fried chicken she gave to us. Such kind gesture hardly comes by these days, we were later find in the night.

And my father blamed the school for being careless and the security for being carefree, the fear of ember Month then was worse than Boko Haram and kids were in high demands for rituals. My dad didn't hesitate to remove us from the school, that was the end of it all.

I never met Sandra again and I didn't make any effort, that is why St Thomas Aquinas said the happenings of the past is no more. Sandra remains in the past and I left my trade mark before leaving her 'she will miss me'

TBC..

MY BREAKUPS 18+


-Episode 2


The most confused part of the body is the heart, the heart wants everything and desires nothing. If original sin or Adamic nature is anything to go by, then that Apple Adam and Eve ate is the mind, the mind house the memories and we remember 90℅ of evil and probably 20℅ of good.

Due to how populated we are in my family, my social association is in house and I can give a head counts of my friends from childhood till now.
Around 2003 and 2004, Nollywood deserted Emeka Ike and one other prominent actress in acting boring love storyline movies, they started acting historical and cultural movies.

Most movies produced this period were movies that the protagonists and some warriors of the village, head to the evil forest to redeem the land from tragedy.
the popular ones were Igodo, Egg of Life, and land of dwarfs, lastly Agumba.
We practiced these movies more than we watched it, I and my twin brother.

Our permanent settlement in Ahoada then was like a homestead settlement, as barely eight houses could be find in that area, and probably this was the time bush fallowing was highly practiced in the country. So it was quite easy for us to explore bushes with our creative mindset of replicating what we had earlier watched.

The urban area then was fast growing, at certain time. A good road network was created in the area we lived,
since there is a popular secondary school which name is Western Ahoada County High. It made it easier for a good road network to be available, there were three main exits and entrances then, as one was through a civil defense barrack that birthed the name of the area, and the other leads to Ula-Upata road and the last one is through the popular secondary school which was fenced but the creative students didn't let their predecessors to witness the fence.

The children of the area, weren't left out from our insane act of going to fight imaginary evil spirits in the bushes, but the closest friend we had then was Chiwebudu. My twin brother and I practically shared everything, except girls.
Which I was the pioneer then, Chiwebudu's dad was a great hunter then that hunts animals in the thick bushes, so I ate a lot of animals through him.

My friend was always met with ill-fate whenever we returned from our adventures, Chiwebudu's dad will caught him in his collar and threw him up the zinc, inasmuch we pitied our friend we couldn't help but laugh as his father repeated same actions several time before giving him scissor kick in the last one.

Our act of disappearing into bushes gave my dad headache, I wasn't surprised when I heard my father's voice from our parlour "Nice, you will take Victor and Victory with you, as you are leaving with Millicent to Army Secondary School in Elele" my dad said. In no time, we were bundled out of Ahoada.

During this period the only express road that leads to Port-Harcourt was through Elele,
it was during the tenure of Umaro Yara'dua as president and Chibuike Amaechi as Governor, that the East-West road was initiated.
When we left town, my dad would have heaved a sigh of relief.

There was formerly a park at the entrance to Ahoada main time coming from Port-Harcourt, at the left was a car park that conveyed passengers from Ahoada to Elele and stopped at Port-Harcourt.
Also, people coming from Bayelsa ply this route also,
I and my brother were registered in Peacock Nursery and Primary school in Elele without our knowledge.
That was the school, I met my first love.

We barely settled in the house we rented in the hamlet called Mami, the highest number of houses in the hamlet were built with mud and cemented afterwards, two or three houses were the only block houses in the hamlet.
the hamlet was closed to the expressway making it easy for transportation,
there was no church in the hamlet but a mosque situated at were the nomadic slaughters cow for meats, few kilometers behind the hamlet were terriers and block houses occupied by soldiers and their wives.

My sister Nice gave us fifteen commandments like Moses did to the Israelites, we listened carefully to it like the tribe of Israelites. After we heard the fifteen commandments we knew it won't take a week before we go against one or two.

TBC...

Visit www.felvicstories.com to read more

MY BREAKUPS 18+


-Episode 3


There is a reason we met those we met in our life, some gave us sweet memories and some bad memories, all in all these are our life experiences that shaped us to be who we are.
Fate has a stronghold in our life philosophy, perhaps a rethink on our past we bring us to realization.

In those days, Egbesu boys and soldiers were at each others necks. As they open fire at each other frequently, sending many souls to their Makers. Since, we lived close to the road and the hamlet was gingerly protected by soldiers, I woke up every morning to hear several stories of gunshots in the night.
"You heard the gun shot in the night?" my elder sister Millicent asked, I gave her a puzzled look and shook my head negatively.

We took our bath and readied for school, the walk to school was an interesting one. As group of pupils like us, moved in groups heading to our destination, I didn't actually like what I ate that morning 'cause it was bread and tea, I was forced to take it by my elder sister Nice.
It still baffles me why Africans tend to imitate the Europeans in everything they do.

We were thrown apart to different classes and I smelt the handiwork of my father, my brother was taken to Arm B while I remained in arm A, the school was a big one and they had lots of pupils because it was the only primary and nursery school in the area.
My first day in school, was an interesting one as I met with everyone and knew no one but Abigail.

She was practically answering all the questions in the class, while I looked innocently with my new uniform. "You, 2 ×2?" the mistress pointed to my direction asking that question, I looked back twice to check if it was actually me or someone else.
she confirmed it with a nod that she was actually asking me the question, I hated mathematics right from my mother's womb, so it wasn't funny as beads of sweat formed on my forehead before answering the question.

That day wasn't a day I wished to remember in my life, when it was break time.
my brother and I met at the classes corridor, we watched kids played and people running around the school.
"2 ×2!" I heard a feminine voice shouted behind me, I turned and saw Abigail smiling broadly as if the encounter was funny.

I ignored her that day, she was so full of life and jovial.
she ran off afterwards, we went out of the school to look for our elder sisters to give us some money to get something for ourselves. My sister didn't like the idea of giving us money, she bought what we ate and continued that way till we left the place.

School went well that day, when it was 12noon. My brother and I set out since school has closed for the day, my sister were to close by 2pm so we didn't bother to check up on them.
That was actually the first law we disobeyed, we headed home and stayed outside.

We were playing around in the compound and our uniform got dirty, we even played with our Landlady's duck fowl.
We moved from that place to his brother's shop to watch wrestling, this was the time Undertaker was the trend in Wrestling, my preferred superstars then were Rey Mysterious and Undertaker, they were my favorite.

Around 2004 wresting was gaining ground in Nigeria, I was captivated by what was going on in the screen didn't notice when my brother left me there.
When the time was close to 2pm, I left the shop and headed home. I met him waving across to me from a restaurant close to were we lived, it was just a few walks I was right before him.

I went in with him and met a free plate of pepper soup, and a girl with him which he later introduced as Rotimi. Fair and same height like us, I didn't actually like the girl so didn't even remember asking for her origin.
She gave us pepper soup secretly and we enjoyed ourselves to our fill, without the knowledge of her mother. My stomach didn't actually hate her, as I outrightly devoured whatever is on the plate.

The moment we sighted our sisters approaching, we ran to the door of our one room and waited.
She didn't answer our greetings neither did she warn us about the impending beating of our life.
The moment the door opened we were ushered in like sacrificial lambs.
She grabbed the spatula and beats us with it, I was the first to cry then, but was the brain that orchestrated our crime.

After the spatula was broken, we were asked to wash our uniforms. We did an abracadabra with soap and Omo given to us and dried it on the rope, tied to two trees in front of the yard.
The uniform looked just the same before and after washing,
right at the extreme of the house is a shop and inner rooms that belongs to the shop owner, Beselnor and his mother lived, with her kid brother.

That was a place soldiers camped to smoke and drink especially in the night, it was a crime to go over there on my sister's side.
But I was curious to know what always happened there in the night, when we were asked to read after eating.
"Sister, I want to poo poo" I lied, she granted me permission and I left the text book wide open.
My brother also said the same thing, but my sister asked him to poo poo there if he can't wait till I returned.

The houses didn't carry toilet, so the toilet was stationed according to the houses in the hamlet in a place just outskirt the hamlet.
It was a long walk, I pretended to be going to the supposed direction until I knew there was no one looking at me and sneaked into another route leading back to Belsenor's mother's shop.

"We were in the camp for training, we heard dead soldiers marching and singing parade songs, many soldiers were killed by ghosts of death soldiers, as they shot at us with their spiritual guns and fought us with their spiritual knives, one of them cut-off my ear and I gummed it back" how true is tale was, I didn't know if he was inspired by the emptied bottles on the table before him or the cigarette he held in his hand, all I knew is that I was scared and made a big mistake for not going back to the route that I took earlier.

"Are you not one of the new tenant?" Belsenor asked me before I could reached my room that I shared with my sisters and brother.

TBC..

MY BREAKUPS 18+


-Episode 4


We only get to fall in love once, love is like virginity, when it is gone it is gone. And we will never have the replica of those feelings again if we lost the one we actually fell in love with.

Behind Belsenor was my sister Millicent sitting on the window of our one room, she was looking at me with her eagle eyes and she was the only one that doesn't trust me with girls.
I ignored Belsenor completely and walked away, I entered our room and went straight to reading.

The next day in school was an eye-opener, when we were gathered in the devotion by the bell.
After they sang the Nigeria anthem which I followed, and then the school anthem which I never learnt or joined them till I left the school.
A girl was called upon to read a newspaper, I didn't care to understand and knew nothing of what she read. I later learnt the girl was Abigail's elder sister.

In the class that day, the teacher asked a question which no one could answer, she threatened to flog everyone of us if we didn't answer it. It wasn't actually a threat as she started flogging the first role and the next role followed, she was getting close to Abigail who was on the third role.

"Three types of soil are loamy, sandy, and clay" I said, she stopped flogging the pupils.
from that day henceforth the most beautiful girl in our class was grateful and indebted to me, Abigail wasn't just beautiful.
she was brilliant and smart, our teacher left the class before the bell for break time was rang.

Abigail came over and pinched me, "you actually have something in your head" she told me bringing out her tongue, she stood up and walked away swinging her ass that wasn't showing in the pinafore.
Abigail was crazy and I love every bit of her.

I fell ill so wasn't able to go to school for two days, my sister always gave me medicine and a cup of water. I always ended up drinking only the water and putting the whole drugs inside my shirt through the collar, the day my sister saw a tablet on the floor she personally stuffed the medicine inside my mouth and I didn't stop spitting for an hour or so.

I was always escorting my elder sister Millicent anytime she wants to buy foodstuffs, the day she took me to buy cow meats from Aminu.
The northerners that sold meats stayed close to the mosque. A structure built with hardwoods and a zinc on the top for shelter,
"What is your name?" Aminu asked with Hausa language,
"He isn't from Hausa, he is my brother" my sister replied him.

Aminu gave us a lot of meats that day for just one hundred naira, he said I look just like the Emir son of Sokoto.
With my black shiny snake skin, we thanked him for the meats. And my sisters didn't stop sending me to Aminu to buy meats till we left the place, and Aminu didn't fail in giving me lot of meats.

Sometimes, he'd want to take me to his house so that I can see his children.
I was always afraid of the Northerners so I always outsmarted him and didn't go to his house till my days in Mami was over.
with Aminu my teeth always get tired of Salah suya, and ram.

My friendship with Abigail blossomed, as we became close to each other.
What actually brought Abigail and I together, was our teacher who gave both of class monitors.
As then, the teachers were having lots of meetings so we were asked to keep the class quiet with canes.

I wasn't able to use the cane because Abigail who is the female monitor with me is the champion and leader of noise makers,
anytime I tried to flog her friends with the cane we ended up kissing or hugging in the class.
Before the term ended, Abigail moved to my seats and we did a lot of crazy things that I won't put down in writing 'cause I was so young to engage in them.

I was doing well in my education, and I was glowing with happiness.
Abigail was naughty and crazy, but she was my drug and i loved every bit of her.
She later introduced me to her sisters as her husband, and her sister accepted me warmly.
Then the Nigeria song trending was "my mama force me to marry, she say make I give am pikin to carry, I tell my mama make she wait so that I go marry. But she cannot wait for a long time" I didn't remember the artist, but I knew then this song was the banger in 2004 or 2005.

And the America song trending that period was "Orema beautiful girl, you are the one I love, Orema go..." I didn't remember the names of these two artists but I knew their songs were the trend, I didn't stop singing this song for Abigail.
After the end of year party, that year ended.
Something happened the next year that left an indelible mark in my heart, they say time flies whenever someone was happy.
A sudden happiness brings a sudden sorrow.

TBC...

visit www.felvicstories.com