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Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes - Family (10) - Nairaland

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Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by BentSpoon(m): 8:54pm On May 20, 2020
meetme01:
You don F-up. Raising your hands on any woman talkless your wife has degraded you. That's the bitter truth.

Back to the main issue. Your wife needs your unreserved apology. You need remorseful which is through your attitude. Let her know you are deeply sorry.

To her, is she not working? Why have you refused to set her up in a biz? One problem I have realized in today's marriage is, finance. It's really creating a lot of issues in most marriage. As a man, if you earn from three sources, declare only two. Let her know how the money is spent to the last kobo. That was the initial problem, you need to fix that part asap

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by wany(f): 8:55pm On May 20, 2020
chinchonglee:

You are very useless for this comment!!!
The wife deserve unending beating!
You only beat because you feel you are stronger,but be careful many are not alive to tell stories.watch your ego you are warned. undecided
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by jorez: 8:56pm On May 20, 2020
If your wife is industrious and resourceful with 100k she can make a fortune with her life,my wife started jewelry business with just13,500 naira few years back and today is able to make millions from it,thinking of jumping overseas is an unrealistic way to approach her condition, give her small money let her enter street,learn the process and she will hit a gold dream.
Best of luck to you both

1 Like

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by apexc5680: 8:57pm On May 20, 2020
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Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by Samcent: 8:57pm On May 20, 2020
Emmytrill:
With all what I have been reading online since this lockdown, I can't just help but thank God for my wife o. No troubles, we manage the little we have, drink garri when there is non and smile through it all. Baba God thank u!
My dear, please you need to thank God again.

That is one of the greatest blessings from God!
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by apexc5680: 8:57pm On May 20, 2020
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by dinachi(m): 8:58pm On May 20, 2020
Poorboy:
Broke man ,broke man if her father is not broke will she be totally dependent on you.

How old is she?

Is she educated?

Does she have a job?

Is the other sisters married and doing well than you people?

Is she from a wealthy home, like she is used to comfort already?

Which state do you reside?

See you cannot satisfy greed, your wife is a greedy person. How can your wife ask you to look for money for her to travel out then you feel you have a wife.

Work on your emotions don't allow the term wife to make you try to impress, if you put yourself in unnecessary pressure to make money and die before your burial another man will already be sleeping with her. She is the money type.

Tell people the truth and let them know their worth, I once told my fiancee I am not your responsibility, if you can't survive quit.

Don't regret beating her, though I don't subscribe to that.

The best advice so far.
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by GreenDestiny2: 8:58pm On May 20, 2020
meetme01:
You don F-up. Raising your hands on any woman talkless your wife has degraded you. That's the bitter truth.

Back to the main issue. Your wife needs your unreserved apology. You need remorseful which is through your attitude. Let her know you are deeply sorry.

To her, is she not working? Why have you refused to set her up in a biz? One problem I have realized in today's marriage is, finance. It's really creating a lot of issues in most marriage. As a man, if you earn from three sources, declare only two. Let her know how the money is spent to the last kobo. That was the initial problem, you need to fix that part asap

I didn't know we still have idiots like you here... talking for the sake of likes.

6 Likes

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by bmdmixer: 8:58pm On May 20, 2020
ademidedavid:
It's no longer a story that pastors divorce their partners, imams divorce their partners, highly educated people do same and even the so called marriage counsellors are not left out in the order of the day and it has always been a thing of worry for me with the thought that they never loved each other before marriage but getting married has changed my thinking and has made me realised that marriage only takes the grace of God to work out.

I have been married for 3 years with 1 beautiful daughter with a loving wife (maybe before and some years into the marriage). I have always believed that I cannever raise my hand on my woman since my father never did such but I find it hard to believe I did the unimaginable today although It wasn't intentional.

It was due to annoyance after she asked me to stop sitting at home and go work for more money like other men even though I am a federal worker with above 100k monthly income and still do personal work as a civil engineer apart from the federal job despite the lockdown.....

It really got me aggravated because I have been the one fending for the family and the kid for the past 3 years and never asked for a kobo from her.....

Although I have noticed the urge for very flamboyant life style in her lately and has even asked me to get more money at any means, that money is everything in this life even though I have tried telling her its a gradual process, she still doesn't listen and even asked me to raise money for her to travel out of Nigeria.

I have never thought of raising my hands on any woman let alone my wife.....

Please how do I change her sudden mentality towards this sudden extravagant life style because I pray it doesn't lead to something else since I can't do illegal things to acquire the type of wealth she dreams of?
when u start listening to a wifes advice without thinking, d earth begins to look for a nice shovel with ur name on it

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by humilitypays(m): 8:58pm On May 20, 2020
I have said it over and over again, 99% of the problems in today marriages is as a result of money and then sex!

Guys don't allow anybody to push you to marry when you are not financially ready and settled because majority of ladies today want a flamboyant life even in marriage....social media have influenced today women, they now live for the gram!

Op, with the kind of life most Nigerian ladies of today want to live in marriage, no federal civil service job without corruption can afford it. How much do they pay most civil servants; NGN250,000 at most for level 12 above which most young people cannot attain until they have approached 50yrs+.


It is not a must to marry. If you cannot find a lady ready to work and till the soil with you to make that billions she wants to enjoy and flaunt, please stay single oh, the world is already overpopulated, we have enough humans so if you no born, its not a big deal!!

If you must marry, marry a working class lady, working class ladies seem to have sense small, more than jobless, unemployed ladies who only sit at home watching TV and fantasising to live flamboyant life like those they spend their whole time watching on TV. Guys stop glorifying unemployed, manner less ladies with wedding ring!!!

Marry financially productive ladies, they understand the pains of making a dime, they appreciate the little you have and are ready to put effort with you to build that dream future, not all those lazy, jobless ladies una de marry all because of big ass and big breast that you will still get bored and tired of after you marry her angry

18 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by HarunaWest(m): 8:59pm On May 20, 2020
wany:

You are warp in reasoning, you slap an adult all because she is a wife.count your self lucky she is meek,se bi you go lie down sleep abi,walahi you go wake up for yonder.se na man you be.nonsense undecided
Oya come over nah, whether you self wont collect slap,see your careless talk...Na una type dem dey beat like talking drum for house...nansense
You want to form feminist(broke feminists) but you ladies cant work harder.
Una dey find man as breadwinner.
Lemme advice you aunty, never insult or rub shoulders with a man due to ineffiencies beyond him,you go collect straught up.

6 Likes

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by scriptures01: 8:59pm On May 20, 2020
I have attended many wedding ceremonies when the bride or the groom will say "I married my best friend".
Ask yourself!
How often did you have some argument with your best friend?
How often has your best friend said something to you that they regret?
I think most of us would say sometimes.
In marriage, it's never a good sign if there's no argument ever.
What's happening to you is normal in marriage.

What your wife said might sound hurtful but believe me, she didn't mean it.
You are the man, don't go acting crazy and giving her the silence treatment, allow her to cool off
and then days or weeks or even months when the whole issue is long gone.
Sit her down and share your feelings about what she said.
N.B: Here is why you should never act on impulse when dealing with a woman, you have just revealed to your
her what she needs to say to get you acting all crazy.
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by dinachi(m): 8:59pm On May 20, 2020
wany:

You only beat because you feel you are stronger,but be careful many are not alive to tell stories.watch your ego you are warned. undecided
You are a senior Otondo for this nonsense you just wrote.

1 Like

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by jagaban002(m): 9:00pm On May 20, 2020
LegitGirl:


You’re not a serious person. You’re not the talking type... what are you then, the beating type?

Nonsense and ingredients! Coward!
Calling him coward just shows you are a cow , and woman like u deserve to be slapped Always . Calling him a coward nd not seeing the part where d lazy wife is over demanding well I can blame u because who will even marry she goat like u .

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by apexc8880: 9:02pm On May 20, 2020
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by mechanics(m): 9:04pm On May 20, 2020
Keep praying for her to change that mentality.
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by Karda20: 9:05pm On May 20, 2020
ademidedavid:
It's no longer a story that pastors divorce their partners, imams divorce their partners, highly educated people do same and even the so called marriage counsellors are not left out in the order of the day and it has always been a thing of worry for me with the thought that they never loved each other before marriage but getting married has changed my thinking and has made me realised that marriage only takes the grace of God to work out.

I have been married for 3 years with 1 beautiful daughter with a loving wife (maybe before and some years into the marriage). I have always believed that I cannever raise my hand on my woman since my father never did such but I find it hard to believe I did the unimaginable today although It wasn't intentional.

It was due to annoyance after she asked me to stop sitting at home and go work for more money like other men even though I am a federal worker with above 100k monthly income and still do personal work as a civil engineer apart from the federal job despite the lockdown.....

It really got me aggravated because I have been the one fending for the family and the kid for the past 3 years and never asked for a kobo from her.....

Although I have noticed the urge for very flamboyant life style in her lately and has even asked me to get more money at any means, that money is everything in this life even though I have tried telling her its a gradual process, she still doesn't listen and even asked me to raise money for her to travel out of Nigeria.

I have never thought of raising my hands on any woman let alone my wife.....

Please how do I change her sudden mentality towards this sudden extravagant life style because I pray it doesn't lead to something else since I can't do illegal things to acquire the type of wealth she dreams of?

Sorry for your plight. I must say, the mistake is most likely from you. You married who I will called a gold digger. No disrespect meant. The signs should have been there before marriage but you just ignored them for whatever reason, maybe because her beauty or good sex.

Please, get a copy of the book titled "The possibility of Sex" by Alan Roger. Download it from b-ok.cc. You will see where you made mistake. I ENCOURAGE EVERY SINGLE GUY THAT SEE THIS MESSAGE TO READ THE BOOK. IT'S AN EYE OPENER TO THE DIFFERENT TYPE OF LADIES WHEN IT COMES TO ROMANCE.

I hope the op find solution to your plight soon.

1 Like

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by jay2smart19(m): 9:06pm On May 20, 2020
meetme01:
You don F-up. Raising your hands on any woman talkless your wife has degraded you. That's the bitter truth.

Back to the main issue. Your wife needs your unreserved apology. You need remorseful which is through your attitude. Let her know you are deeply sorry.

To her, is she not working? Why have you refused to set her up in a biz? One problem I have realized in today's marriage is, finance. It's really creating a lot of issues in most marriage. As a man, if you earn from three sources, declare only two. Let her know how the money is spent to the last kobo. That was the initial problem, you need to fix that part asap

Shut up and keep quiet. No wisdom in anything you have just said. In this economy he earns over a 100k and does side hustle and you think finance is the problem. The woman is the problem. The association and things she crave are the problem. I will advise the gentleman set up a fund for his child cause its either that woman don cut rope or she wan cut rope. Whichever way, it not looking funny.
But bros for no beat her but e still no funny say I go de bring legit 100 pin come house you go de tell me make I go look for more. Shey na yahoo I go do abi Kini? Some women eh.

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by temptnow: 9:07pm On May 20, 2020
ademidedavid:

Yes, she has been listening to how most of her friends have travelled out and seeing them on social media, how they send things home and the others on instagram but are we now running a race? Not that we are doing so badly here in Nigeria.

Social media has made lots of people be into unnecessary pressure to live large. That's why people are deleting their Facebook accounts, better still logout and delete the app from your phone.

99% of the time social media destroys marriages cos of people who compare themselves to others

2 Likes

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by wany(f): 9:09pm On May 20, 2020
HarunaWest:

Oya come over nah, whether you self wont collect slap,see your careless talk...Na una type dem dey beat like talking drum for house...nansense
You want to form feminist(broke feminists) but you ladies cant work harder.
Una dey find man as breadwinner.
Lemme advice you aunty, never insult or rub shoulders with a man due to ineffiencies beyond him,you go collect straught up.
Dont argue with broke dudes talk less of an aboki.you look me in the face and slap me,for what ? Who born you.is that what you inherited from your dad.6feet awaits you.for sure I guarantee you.low life only silly and damage sick sychos support domestic violence. undecided ladies beware na them be this.
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by Saintinoo(m): 9:11pm On May 20, 2020
ademidedavid:
It's no longer a story that pastors divorce their partners, imams divorce their partners, highly educated people do same and even the so called marriage counsellors are not left out in the order of the day and it has always been a thing of worry for me with the thought that they never loved each other before marriage but getting married has changed my thinking and has made me realised that marriage only takes the grace of God to work out.

I have been married for 3 years with 1 beautiful daughter with a loving wife (maybe before and some years into the marriage). I have always believed that I cannever raise my hand on my woman since my father never did such but I find it hard to believe I did the unimaginable today although It wasn't intentional.

It was due to annoyance after she asked me to stop sitting at home and go work for more money like other men even though I am a federal worker with above 100k monthly income and still do personal work as a civil engineer apart from the federal job despite the lockdown.....

It really got me aggravated because I have been the one fending for the family and the kid for the past 3 years and never asked for a kobo from her.....

Although I have noticed the urge for very flamboyant life style in her lately and has even asked me to get more money at any means, that money is everything in this life even though I have tried telling her its a gradual process, she still doesn't listen and even asked me to raise money for her to travel out of Nigeria.

I have never thought of raising my hands on any woman let alone my wife.....

Please how do I change her sudden mentality towards this sudden extravagant life style because I pray it doesn't lead to something else since I can't do illegal things to acquire the type of wealth she dreams of?
Sorry to say this, but this lady yous just described does not love you, have never loved you.

Maybe you were blinded by something that you didn't see her real character. Again, find out about her new friend, they might just be giving her the wrong advice.

Lastly before i forget, please suspend sex or protect yourself when having sex for now, she might be sleeping around outside, since you cannot provide her needs, those rich dudes might just be giving her what she wants.

3 Likes

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by VictorBode(m): 9:11pm On May 20, 2020
wany:

Dont argue with broke dudes talk less of an aboki.you look me in the face and slap me,for what ? Who born you.is that what you inherited from your dad.6feet awaits you.for sure I guarantee you.low life only silly and damage sick sychos support domestic violence. undecided ladies beware na them be this.

Actually if you do that, 6 feet awaits the both of you.

Stop supporting murder
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by angelfallz(m): 9:11pm On May 20, 2020
ademidedavid:
It's no longer a story that pastors divorce their partners, imams divorce their partners, highly educated people do same and even the so called marriage counsellors are not left out in the order of the day and it has always been a thing of worry for me with the thought that they never loved each other before marriage but getting married has changed my thinking and has made me realised that marriage only takes the grace of God to work out.

I have been married for 3 years with 1 beautiful daughter with a loving wife (maybe before and some years into the marriage). I have always believed that I cannever raise my hand on my woman since my father never did such but I find it hard to believe I did the unimaginable today although It wasn't intentional.

It was due to annoyance after she asked me to stop sitting at home and go work for more money like other men even though I am a federal worker with above 100k monthly income and still do personal work as a civil engineer apart from the federal job despite the lockdown.....

It really got me aggravated because I have been the one fending for the family and the kid for the past 3 years and never asked for a kobo from her.....

Although I have noticed the urge for very flamboyant life style in her lately and has even asked me to get more money at any means, that money is everything in this life even though I have tried telling her its a gradual process, she still doesn't listen and even asked me to raise money for her to travel out of Nigeria.

I have never thought of raising my hands on any woman let alone my wife.....

Please how do I change her sudden mentality towards this sudden extravagant life style because I pray it doesn't lead to something else since I can't do illegal things to acquire the type of wealth she dreams of?

1. It is not love that sustains marriage
2. Please take your problem to your mum or dad, or someone in your family you trust. NL is not the best for such a delicate issue

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by HarunaWest(m): 9:12pm On May 20, 2020
wany:

Dont argue with broke dudes talk less of an aboki.you look me in the face and slap me,for what ? Who born you.is that what you inherited from your dad.6feet awaits you.for sure I guarantee you.low life only silly and damage sick sychos support domestic violence. undecided ladies beware na them be this.
Lol...Come and marry me nah whether i wont domesticate you like Bingo.
Yall talking and bragging.
You think this is America or the west, try nansense, you go collect and maybe na you go first go the 6 feet first afterall na two fighting.
Dan Inska.

5 Likes

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by udemzyudex(m): 9:13pm On May 20, 2020
ademidedavid:
It's no longer a story that pastors divorce their partners, imams divorce their partners, highly educated people do same and even the so called marriage counsellors are not left out in the order of the day and it has always been a thing of worry for me with the thought that they never loved each other before marriage but getting married has changed my thinking and has made me realised that marriage only takes the grace of God to work out.

I have been married for 3 years with 1 beautiful daughter with a loving wife (maybe before and some years into the marriage). I have always believed that I cannever raise my hand on my woman since my father never did such but I find it hard to believe I did the unimaginable today although It wasn't intentional.

It was due to annoyance after she asked me to stop sitting at home and go work for more money like other men even though I am a federal worker with above 100k monthly income and still do personal work as a civil engineer apart from the federal job despite the lockdown.....

It really got me aggravated because I have been the one fending for the family and the kid for the past 3 years and never asked for a kobo from her.....

Although I have noticed the urge for very flamboyant life style in her lately and has even asked me to get more money at any means, that money is everything in this life even though I have tried telling her its a gradual process, she still doesn't listen and even asked me to raise money for her to travel out of Nigeria.

I have never thought of raising my hands on any woman let alone my wife.....

Please how do I change her sudden mentality towards this sudden extravagant life style because I pray it doesn't lead to something else since I can't do illegal things to acquire the type of wealth she dreams of?

Tell her Ogbeni, tí o ba fe kabuku, o fe ni.

1 Like

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by jay2smart19(m): 9:13pm On May 20, 2020
ademidedavid:

She tends to be the best wife and mum if their is money but changes once its the opposite even her mum noticed her mood during this lockdown period.

You no fit tell me say you self no see this behaviour during courtship

1 Like

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by faithy29: 9:14pm On May 20, 2020
[try to wake her up in the middle of the night and talk to her calmly. After the discursion ask her to pray for the family. May God help you.
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by Solatium(m): 9:15pm On May 20, 2020
ademidedavid:
It's no longer a story that pastors divorce their partners, imams divorce their partners, highly educated people do same and even the so called marriage counsellors are not left out in the order of the day and it has always been a thing of worry for me with the thought that they never loved each other before marriage but getting married has changed my thinking and has made me realised that marriage only takes the grace of God to work out.

I have been married for 3 years with 1 beautiful daughter with a loving wife (maybe before and some years into the marriage). I have always believed that I cannever raise my hand on my woman since my father never did such but I find it hard to believe I did the unimaginable today although It wasn't intentional.

It was due to annoyance after she asked me to stop sitting at home and go work for more money like other men even though I am a federal worker with above 100k monthly income and still do personal work as a civil engineer apart from the federal job despite the lockdown.....

It really got me aggravated because I have been the one fending for the family and the kid for the past 3 years and never asked for a kobo from her.....

Although I have noticed the urge for very flamboyant life style in her lately and has even asked me to get more money at any means, that money is everything in this life even though I have tried telling her its a gradual process, she still doesn't listen and even asked me to raise money for her to travel out of Nigeria.

I have never thought of raising my hands on any woman let alone my wife.....

Please how do I change her sudden mentality towards this sudden extravagant life style because I pray it doesn't lead to something else since I can't do illegal things to acquire the type of wealth she dreams of?



That you are here seeking advice means you are yet to lose it.
Dude,Put your feet down and stamp your authority on that Marriage now,if you accede to her demands ,she will dump you and move on when she gets whatever her target is and you will feel used.
I repeat PUT YOUR FEET DOWN AND STAMP YOUR AUTHORITY ,if she wants to keep the marriage she will stay.
A friend is in serious trouble now for not curtailing his wife excess,they are both abroad now and this Woman keeps pushing my guy and making life unbearable for him.

5 Likes

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by dederocs(m): 9:16pm On May 20, 2020
She go kill you, run.

1 Like

Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by Tecord1(m): 9:17pm On May 20, 2020
meetme01:
You don F-up. Raising your hands on any woman talkless your wife has degraded you. That's the bitter truth.

Back to the main issue. Your wife needs your unreserved apology. You need remorseful which is through your attitude. Let her know you are deeply sorry.

To her, is she not working? Why have you refused to set her up in a biz? One problem I have realized in today's marriage is, finance. It's really creating a lot of issues in most marriage. As a man, if you earn from three sources, declare only two. Let her know how the money is spent to the last kobo. That was the initial problem, you need to fix that part asap
Are you married?
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by VicM6: 9:17pm On May 20, 2020
She ask u to raise money for her to travel out of the country and you still call that WIFE?... Let me ask u dear Op, does she have any relatives staying outside d country or she just woke up from her sleep nd said she wants to travel out.... las las na kpesu she go dey sell 4 outside nd btw 3 to 4 months she will cut u off d track nd u will b left alone....

Use ur brain Op, you re d man of d house... mayb her friends or some1 is pushing her to do this or perhaps she is jealous of someone else wife.

And about you hitting her or beating her up then saying it wasn't intentionally is a big Bleep up, apologize to her but remember in the record; you av beaten your wife before period.
Re: Marriage And Its Challenges; My wife is pushing me to the extremes by Saintinoo(m): 9:18pm On May 20, 2020
travelland:
Mr cautioner, hope you don't continue this way, if your wife can't tell you to go out and hustle I wonder who can encourage you in this life
What other hustle should a man with Federal job and a side business be hustling?

He should use her for money ritual ni?

2 Likes 1 Share

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