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How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? - Family (13) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? (40483 Views)

How can I stop my wife from divorcing me? / How Can I Stop My Ex From Visiting My Matrimonial Home? / My Friend's Wife Keeps Disturbing Me For Money (2) (3) (4)

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Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by lordally(m): 1:54pm On Apr 04, 2021
Ebuka78:


A river that forgets it source will surely runs dry. You have to help your mum, God gave you that job to support your family.


If it were your girlfriend, you would help her without thinking twice.

You can divide your salary into half, and give your sister to start a Saloon business/ become a hair stylist.

The next salary, you divide it and assist your brothers or brother to open a trade.

In 3 months time, there wouldn't be pressure on you to help the family. It is not good for one person to be rich in a family, let the rich one help others to get rich.

You should send 50% of your last month salary to sustain your mum.


You don't know what she passed through before birthing you. She would never tell you.

Switch of your cell phone and regret it for life.

Send her half of your salary for her health and remain blessed for life.

Nairalanders, I don't need your likes and shares. Just read and pass.

You talk you're the one paying the OP or like you know his Salary?? Omo Una funny o
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by bisiswag(f): 1:55pm On Apr 04, 2021
Nigeria where the greatest lie and problem is extended family....you actually don't owe anyone anything EXCEPT your parent's and immediate family. We all need to to get that into our heads and start acting and living it.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by donsheddy1(m): 1:56pm On Apr 04, 2021
Ebuka78:


A river that forgets it source will surely runs dry. You have to help your mum, God gave you that job to support your family.


If it were your girlfriend, you would help her without thinking twice.

You can divide your salary into half, and give your sister to start a Saloon business/ become a hair stylist.

The next salary, you divide it and assist your brothers or brother to open a trade.

In 3 months time, there wouldn't be pressure on you to help the family. It is not good for one person to be rich in a family, let the rich one help others to get rich.

You should send 50% of your last month salary to sustain your mum.


You don't know what she passed through before birthing you. She would never tell you.

Switch of your cell phone and regret it for life.

Send her half of your salary for her health and remain blessed for life.

Nairalanders, I don't need your likes and shares. Just read and pass.
When you see a mugu typing, you'll know.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Fantacy4(m): 1:56pm On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?
guy open your mouth and talk
tell of Dem to go find something and do that they should leave you alone
and as for that your uncle he enjoys seeing suffering tell him to his face that nothing go do ur mama
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by lordally(m): 1:57pm On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:


Guy stop typing what you don't know about me.

I know what I am doing for them.

I just need an advice, not a bad judgement from a person who believes he knows everything about me.


My brother don't mind the guy!!! He's just ignorant so make you sacrifice all your salary for relatives
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by simpman75(m): 2:03pm On Apr 04, 2021
The only way to stop them ftom disturbing you is to die grin grin grin
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Mr5050(m): 2:04pm On Apr 04, 2021
Brother man let me tell you, problem no dey finish, as u are finishing one, another is raising its head. we met problem here we are still going to die and leave behind the problems for the living na so it will continue till God knows when.
If is possible, employ a young gal that will be looking after your mum so that you will focus on ur job, send money monthly as your power reach.
If possible change the line or block the evil uncle.
As it is in your power call frequent the gal that will be staying with her to know the real situation of matters cos ur uncle maybe blowing the matter out of proportion.
Finally, encourage your siblings to join you to take care of ur mother cos no be only u she born.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Yankee101: 2:09pm On Apr 04, 2021
Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?


No. Men don't run away from problems. You confront them.

Don't resign

Make a budgetary allocation. If you want to avoid their troubles, move her to your place along with a female relative that can help take care of her and stay in the hospital with her while you work. That way you can block others disturbing your peace like that uncle
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by SavageMaster: 2:11pm On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?

Move your Mom to the town you reside, so she can get better care and medical attention.

As for the rest of your relations, simply ignore them.

You need to be close to God too, and be prayerful, so your uncle's plan of seeing you back to the village after resigning from your Federal job doesn't materialize.

Finally, be careful about the info you give out to your relations about your life and progress.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Charly68: 2:12pm On Apr 04, 2021
Your uncle knows about your Mum's sickness if not he wont ask you to leave your job for village to take care of the woman ,if the man dies afyer that,what will be your fate? They want to use the woman to trouble your peace because she is not strong spiritualy. Get closer to God because from all indication according to your explanations, it is a spiritual battle.
Pray that nobody will use your mother or sibblings to trouble your peace in Jesus name. Also note that you dont reward people same way in life. Reward them on the basis of their contribution to your life . Stop bothering your mind on those who didn't contribute anything to your life and are demanding for undue attention..it is a simple decision you need to take. God will heal your mum as you pray for her
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by writeprof(m): 2:14pm On Apr 04, 2021
BRATISLAVA:


I believe there are probably evil forces.

But I do not believe that people getting sick is to spite wealthy family members. I think they are simply selfish and don't want to help, so they claim the sickness is a thing.

I've seen it play out a lot. People let their mothers die, while on trendy vacation abroad, because they just don't want to give them any money because they feel they're trying to gobble all their money.

Definitely, there are many instances where people get ill for many reasons and are abandoned by selfish children or family members. This is a seed that always brings its reward as I believe the word of God which says, "Honour your father and mother so that your days may be long on earth."
For the situation we are referring to here, I think the OP only expressed his fears about such situation not being the case with his mother.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Oluwaseun2020(m): 2:22pm On Apr 04, 2021
kaboninc:
[s][/s]

Please just keep quiet.
I know you have made up your mind and only seeking validation from people in here. ive been there done that.
But i promise you...one day you will wake up to realize that blood is thick...and the level of thickness.

Why do you think Americans come back to Africa as poor as it is to seek their roots
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by na2016: 2:22pm On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
What surprises me is that immediately I got the job, my mom started having health challenges.

I have observed it several times in different people.

When they are able to make a breakthrough in life (like getting a good job, graduation, financial breakthroughs),

something bad (like sickness or death) would affect their relatives, either the mom,dad,son, daughter or any close relative.

Please who else has noticed this, and why must it be so?

OP: I hope is not a lecturing job that u r shouting FG job like this? As 4 ur mom, pay one of the women in ur village to be visiting n ccaring for her. fo
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Princewell2012(m): 2:25pm On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:


She is living alone.

I am not the only child.

There are others trying to make ends meet at different places in Nigeria.

I am the only one whose phone is always on whenever they are calling me from the village.

Others have got new lines which they don't want the other relatives to know due to their disturbance.

Whenever they visit my mom, they would stay with her and then go back.

If any of my relatives ask for their numbers, they give their old lines which they only switch on when they are in the village,

claiming that where they are working, their lines do not go through, since they are in remote areas.

Hmm I have been following anyway. But let me make a little contribution.

Though initially I wanted to be a little bit harsh.

If you truly care for your mother, take her to be with you, she don't even need any care giver in your house since she has been able to stay alone. Beside it will be to your own advantage. You can then block those village people if you wish.
You are definitely not a alone on this. my dad died two years ago, I also received a call consequently because of her. some time I don't sleep well because of thinking. Now I have made up my mind to bring her here in Lagos even though my wife frowns at it. But I will go ahead and bring her in so that I can have a piece of mind.

Happy Easter.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Eudes(m): 2:28pm On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
What surprises me is that immediately I got the job, my mom started having health challenges.

I have observed it several times in different people.

When they are able to make a breakthrough in life (like getting a good job, graduation, financial breakthroughs),

something bad (like sickness or death) would affect their relatives, either the mom,dad,son, daughter or any close relative.

Please who else has noticed this, and why must it be so?

What you need now is prayer. I see this a lot in almost every family that grew from grass to grace. If you can, make a sacrifice to God to keep your family alive and healthy. God does not play with sacrifices. Out of experience, I will only advise you to commit to God. Believe me, your money can't solve all challenges that will come to draw you back. Allow God to take control.

Another thing you can do is to work on your mom's mind. Let her feel strong and young from inside. My mom used to take medications almost everyday until I stopped her. Some of these medicines are addictive. They find it difficult to stop once they start taking them. That's when you start hearing health challenges every time.

If she does farm work, try to limit it. Buy her smart wears. Then you can open small store to distract her from too much thinking. Call her often so she will know you are fine and doing great. Happiness can do a lot in her body.

Commit God and make your mom feel young and healthy.


As for other family members, let them know that you not not Messiah. Help them when you can. If you can't help them, let them know. Believe me, without you they will still survive. They think you earn far more than you actually earn.

Build yourself first. Another thing, if you form jagaban when you get to the village, stop it. It makes them think you have reached the promised land.

See, if you say NO now and help them later when you have arrived, they will call you stingy now and crown you king later. But if you form king now and end up being poor, they will praise you now and mock you later.

However, you now know that you need to earn more. Find a way to earn more so you can reach out and do more for your family.

I only say what I know. I wish you well
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by dabosuker(m): 2:31pm On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?

Take care of your Mother , do the best you can do for her, "given your resources". Remember , you cannot kill yourself , do what you can do , while making sure you remain afloat . Off course you love your mother, but it would be stupid to resign from a job , just so you can take care of her . At most you can bring her closer to you . Do the best you can now for her , while she is alive , so that eventually , when she is no longer around , those relatives and your own conscience, won't guilt trip you into a wasteful burial ceremony .

Do the best you can, with your resources , while staying afloat, let the rest of the world go screw themselves .
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Karlifate: 2:35pm On Apr 04, 2021
CapedBaldy:

all that's left is for him to create percentage for himself as payment for creating the formula.

LMAO! grin

1 Like

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Nobody: 2:36pm On Apr 04, 2021
chatinent:
Bros, you are not from Bethlehem!


If I were you, I'll set up a provision store for mom to minimise the monthly expectations.

I can easily relate to what you mean.


Advise everyone of your relatives to go and WORK! Make them know you have your own life to live.


To be great, you have to be stingy.

Because if you fall now, those people will still abuse you that there's nothing you did from your Federal job for so and so years. They'll forget you helped them!

"To be great you have to be Stingy"

Hhhm,

Seems you are right.
Most successful people are stingy people and those that are generous have nothing to give. Seems like what I am going through now. I am too generous and I am tired of my behavior.
Even when I decide to close my eyes to people's problems, I can't.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by quickberry(m): 2:38pm On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:


Guy stop typing what you don't know about me.

I know what I am doing for them.

I just need an advice, not a bad judgement from a person who believes he knows everything about me.


Let ur mom stay with u, take her away from the village.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Karlifate: 2:40pm On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:


What surprises me is that immediately I got the job, my mom started having health challenges.

I have observed it several times in different people.

When they are able to make a breakthrough in life (like getting a good job, graduation, financial breakthroughs), something bad (like sickness or death) would affect their relatives, either the mom,dad,son, daughter or any close relative.

Please who else has noticed this, and why must it be so?


The bold is what we call Fallacy of False Cause.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by tonididdy(m): 2:45pm On Apr 04, 2021
masks:

Okay bro,umm I just wasn't convinced about this story because just yesterday he put up a story about when things starts going well in ones family a sad occurrence almost immediately happens. Well,the said posts gathered lots of comments. Today its this story....I carefully read this anyway and there wasn't enough facts or any facts at all to actually believe this.
I mean it was actually funny.... Negativity needs Positivity to thrive...But,all I read in this story was just a lot of confused Negativity....I'm sorry once again.but its not convincing.
Just read his story again.
... and what are you going to do with the authenticity of his story?
If this was a suicide plea... This was how you would handle it also.
Why are you Nigerians so wicked?
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Nnamaka1: 2:56pm On Apr 04, 2021
Guy! What will be will be bro. You can only help others after you have helped yourself. Don't dare lose that job ooooo. Most families are the reason most people either miss their breakthrough or never get their breakthrough. It's very nice you moved far away from them. Your mom has lived her life. She should allow you to live yours.

My advice to you is to make your peace with God almighty. If God isn't condemning you. No man can condemn you.

Also why can't you invite your mom to come live with you, that way you can have her closer to monitor her health?
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by masks(m): 3:10pm On Apr 04, 2021
tonididdy:
... and what are you going to do with the authenticity of his story? If this was a suicide plea... This was how you would handle it also. Why are you Nigerians so wicked?
And you are not a NIGERIAN!!! Issorite!!!
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by chatinent: 3:19pm On Apr 04, 2021
seyz91:
you right about other things except for the part you said "to be great, you have to be stingy"

thats so fucking wrong on all levels

Stop fucking it, then.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by galaxi(m): 3:25pm On Apr 04, 2021
I have been in your shoes,I was accused of same because of some drastic changes they noticed in my life financially and shortly after my mum became very sick.

Please block most of your extended family members from your social media accounts, do not allow them to know anything about your progress in life (I did same).
You can never please your relatives,even if you give 100% of your salary!!


Keep helping your parents the much you can,it’s not easy considering the present cost of living in Nigeria.

Having aged parents is fustrating,especially when they suffer From sickness that can only be managed and not permanently cured.

God will surely see you through.





lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Xkale1234(m): 3:26pm On Apr 04, 2021
Don't even think of resigning that job.... if you resign, it will be the greatest mistake of ur life. Try as much as possible to always call home possibly daily, to know how ur mum is doing until she gets well. Make sure ur mum is given the best health treatment she deserves....

Don't even think of resigning that job, beware of ur uncle, I sense evil and I am not joking
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Wizzy104(m): 3:38pm On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:


She is living alone.

I am not the only child.

There are others trying to make ends meet at different places in Nigeria.

I am the only one whose phone is always on whenever they are calling me from the village.

Others have got new lines which they don't want the other relatives to know due to their disturbance.

Whenever they visit my mom, they would stay with her and then go back.

If any of my relatives ask for their numbers, they give their old lines which they only switch on when they are in the village,

claiming that where they are working, their lines do not go through, since they are in remote areas.

U already have solution to ur problem.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by shaqur231(m): 3:39pm On Apr 04, 2021
Beware of your family members, something is not spiritually right. I suggest you take your mum to leave with you. Distance her from her family members, get someone to look after her when you go to work. You will see that her health will improve
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by lecturer50(m): 3:40pm On Apr 04, 2021
I thank everyone for the comments.

They are very helpful.

If it were possible, I would have replied all the comments.

Thank you everyone who took out time to give an advice,or an encouragement.
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Karlifate: 4:03pm On Apr 04, 2021
webm:


Bros, this statement shows you don't care about your mom. What's federal job? Your mom became sick because you got a federal job? Common, already calling her witch. C'mon, this is an opportunity for God to bless you!!

Let me tell you my own story.
I got a job a year after graduation and mom became sick almost a year after.

I had to move her from the village to my house. All the money I was making was spent on her.

After 3 good years, she was still with me and God healed her on the third year. Just months before she was healed, I got a job that was paying me more than times 10 of what I earn before . If I'm lying, may I become poor again.

And all those time she was sick, she would cry that my mates are doing well but she held me with sickness. It's always in her prayers that God should bless me. Miraculously, I'm better off now than when she was sick and everything is going sooo fine.

If possible, let mumsy stay with you and go to good hospital.

Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Coolcalmcollect(m): 4:03pm On Apr 04, 2021
lecturer50:
Please house I need an advice.

Ever since I got a federal government job,

my relatives have been disturbing me for money.

There must always be an issue that involves money which they want me to solve.

Recently, my mom become sick.

They are threatening me that I would be held responsible if my mom dies,if I don't make sure she is cured.

But I have taken her to hospitals, and she is trying to recover.

I do this whenever I visit home since I am working in a state far from home.

Her health challenge is due to old age.

But today my uncle called me that I should resign, get back to the village and personally take care of my mom,

failure of which,if she dies, the whole family would hold me responsible for choosing job over my mom.

Can you imagine resigning your federal job to get to the village and start staying?

The calls, the demands, the attacks are getting too much for me.

Please should I just switch off my phone so that no one can contact me?

I just need advice?
lol no be must to associate with stupid family oh, block their line and delete dem from all sm, they owe you nothing, not even your mom. get that fact straight
Re: How Do I Stop My Relatives From Disturbing Me? by Coolcalmcollect(m): 4:05pm On Apr 04, 2021
Ebuka78:


A river that forgets it source will surely runs dry. You have to help your mum, God gave you that job to support your family.


If it were your girlfriend, you would help her without thinking twice.

You can divide your salary into half, and give your sister to start a Saloon business/ become a hair stylist.

The next salary, you divide it and assist your brothers or brother to open a trade.

In 3 months time, there wouldn't be pressure on you to help the family. It is not good for one person to be rich in a family, let the rich one help others to get rich.

You should send 50% of your last month salary to sustain your mum.


You don't know what she passed through before birthing you. She would never tell you.

Switch of your cell phone and regret it for life.

Send her half of your salary for her health and remain blessed for life.

Nairalanders, I don't need your likes and shares. Just read and pass.
you don't have sense.

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