Asour:


Why should we trust you?

We don't even know you! I.e the real you. To us you're just a nairaland moniker.

Hahahahaha! Never mind my jabs above.

On a serious note though, there are NO total solutions in life. Every decision in life essentially involves TRADE-OFFs. I.e. opportunities forgone for taking a course of action. There are TRADE-OFFs to marrying late as well as early. Hell, there are TRADE-OFFs in not marrying vs marrying too. (But that's another conversation).

Intellectual honesty requires that one at least agree that no course of action in subjective issues like these is PERFECT.

It always nice to marry early though but their are costs.

Let's not get into marrying while poor. Unless of course poor is relative.

You go know say this guy go school. Kai...... Most definitely did not pass through the Nigerian education system for sure. See structured response.

Abagworo:
Sometimes not marrying at all is the best. Different strokes for different folks

marriage is sweet

Electrochemistry:
Everybody has their best time There is no fixed age that people must tie the knot.

No hurry in life but delay is dangerous.

Graduate when your mates are graduating. Do things when your mates are doing it.

yetunsbay:
25 ladies
27 guys subject to financial freedom

what if she's 20

How can a poor young man be thinking of marriage in the first place? It may be sure way to depression especially if the wife is also not making much.

Kenmatt:
Let me tell you all the gospel truth and I have seen it a thousand times.

Eighty-five percent of divorcee I have seen, they married at a tender age. Then, the young and charming lady sex drive and youthful excessiveness were very high.

She or he would feel being caged. As she or he hasn't unleached all his or her young man life experiences.

Marriage is for the grown and mature.

you are wise

Short and Simple

Electrochemistry:
Everybody has their best time There is no fixed age that people must tie the knot.

banmee:


You go know say this guy go school. Kai...... Most definitely did not pass through the Nigerian education system for sure. See structured response.

Thanks.

Actually I had (all) my schooling in Nigeria.

Funny enough your nice remarks made me go back to check my response. I found a number of errors which I have now corrected. Thanks again.

It depends on the situation either to marry young or not but if things fear i mean a little bit in favour to marry young is the best

It baffles me when I hear some people talk about marriage as if it's an award or some kind of achievement.

In my area, once u haven't gotten any child out of wedlock or officially married, they see u as an irresponsible person or that something is wrong with u. And, I begin to wonder what kind of mentality is that.

abimic:
Well, there's no best time to get married, I feel one should do that when they're very much ready when their own set Is are dotted and ts crossed. For female, it's African that they marry early while for guys, they can still try to hustle to ensure financial stability, grow more maturity and build an understanding of the female folks. I've learnt that, when it comes to women/marriage, one really have to be very patient. Only few of my female friends get married to their age mate, because ordinarily, most young guys are still trying to find their feet.

in actuality, most ladies would never wish to marry their agemates

Weathered:
Most of the criminals we have today are a product of single parents and very young parents of early 20s

You are right, single mothers are the cause all dis problem we are facing.

Pikin way no get papa de spoil fast fast for mama hand.
The role of a father is irreplaceable

franchasng:
God bless you sweetheart.



Tell them.


As a married man, I know how much I spend monthly on family compared to when I was single. And this keeps me wondering how most Nigerian couple who are struggling financially cope, sometimes thinking about it makes me unnecessarily moody.




People should ignore the OP, I am sure he is not married.


Raising a family today is no longer a joke. Everything has been heavily monetized, so without adequate income, it's going to be hell for any couple.


I pray God help the single and struggling, it's not easy. God will strengthen all single guys working hard to escape poverty, it's a terrible battle, innocent kids shouldn't be dragged into it please

You shoulder most responsiblity yourself that's why.

My elder sister shoulders everything too. Her husband those nothing, after failing to get a job

total rubbish

There are pros and cons to everything in life.

I will use a real life example that I am part of.

Uncle A married early and had his five children early. Very brilliant children but the entire family suffered through everything in life. It was tough! The children became extended family children because the burden was just too much on Uncle A and his wife. All five of them made it through the university system then a new struggle started... no real job, underemployed at best. The second born eventually got a good job six years after graduation then the other ones too started becoming a bit comfortable.

Compare with Uncle B. He married at 42, 15 good years after his older brother, Uncle A. He was one of the angels helping out Uncle A as he was building his financial stability. He was already very comfortable, well traveled and well connected by the time he got married. Lots of his classmates in high school and the university were already doing very well. His three children lacked nothing! The first and second born actually lived in the BQ of the Vice Chancellor of their University because the VC was their Dad's friend! All three got jobs right after NYSC and very comfortable with two of them now living abroad with businesses in Nigeria.

The examples above... I know firsthand, and I learn. No judging, just presenting a real life example.

GeneralPula:
Marrying at young age was very cool in the Olden days, not these days..

Don’t dull yourself OP..

Very underated comment this is. What I wanted to hear

OP made good points there.

Marriage motivators, here we go again. Have you seen the latest divorce statistics? Make pant no wear you o...

gbami:
Please, as a newly married man. Don't listen to this crap.
If you are not ready to marry. Don't do it.
If you are not financially stable to marry as a man, don't do it.

When you can't provide for your wife, that puppy loves turns to resentment. If it lingers well enough hatred, then she will look for other means to get money. She go Bleep your landlord, wey go dey console and encourage to work harder you since you no fit pay house rent.

Evil Names, Change It. The Europeanization Of African Names.
https://africhistory.com/evil-name-change-it-the-europeanization-of-african-names/

Is this what you are experiencing in your marriage? Your wife is sleeping with the landlord?


See, your wife is the issue here and you obviously chose the wrong girl.

Marriage no fit some people. If you can't handle the pressures that's associated with marrriage, don't get married. Fvck societal pressures and what nots!

Marry the love of your life if and only if you're ready for the challenges ahead.

You might be 50 if this happens, but who cares. Your happiness is of the utmost importance!

For me it I'd a very bad experience, my parents was married at 20 and 21 years, the was immatures to had matrimonial home and kid, we suffered so much in this marriage, my father was obliged by his father, my father had always extra marital relationship, he came back with his mistress at home, no respect for children and wife, he have others children outside. Finally after 30 years of marriage, he let my Mom and take another wife. We never seen my mom and dad at home to discussed like friends.

Last last marriage naa scam

Another useless thread. That’s your own fokn opinion

gbami:

Let me guess.. you are not married.
When you get married and he can't provide make sure you remember me.
Guys listen. From a married man. Marriage no be fantasy island o. It is reality. Nobody expects you wife to contribute a penny in marriage unlike relationship. You go get High BP if you can't provide basic stuff for your family. Reality is different from "20 ways to make marriage work" written by one single woman.
If you can't provide basic for yourself and another person...no marry. Guys, Stand up, Draw your ears..Repeat after me.. "If I no fit provide basics for myself and another person, marriage motivators leave me". You can now sit down guys.

Asour:


Thanks.

Actually I had (all) my schooling in Nigeria.

Funny enough your nice remarks made me go back to check my response. I found a number of errors which I have now corrected. Thanks again.

I was more concerned with the logical structure of your comment rather than the grammar. Rare as phuck on NL. Really rare.

Other things being equal, this is naturally and godly correct.

Electrochemistry:
Everybody has their best time There is no fixed age that people must tie the knot.

Marriage is not even in my next 20 yr plan.. lol.

gwama:
For me it I'd a very bad experience, my parents was married at 20 and 21 years, the was immatures to had matrimonial home and kid, we suffered so much in this marriage, my father was obliged by his father, my father had always extra marital relationship, he came back with his mistress at home, no respect for children and wife, he have others children outside. Finally after 30 years of marriage, he let my Mom and take another wife. We never seen my mom and dad at home to discussed like friends.

Sorry for your experience

confirm!

James4358:
Marry when u r financialy stable. Trust me- that's d best time to marry. Maturiry also comes to play too, but that is secondary to a stable income.