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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story (3779 Views)
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A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by maclatunji: 3:04pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
Often times we have an individual that complains about their spouse and we the members of this platform have to advise with caution because we have not heard the "other side" of the story. What if we could actually get both sides? You might consider this thread if you have genuine concerns and want fair advice and resolution of such issues. How this might work? 1. Serve your spouse notice that you want to use this platform as a arbitration medium to solve the dispute. 2. Obtain permission to table your grievance. 3. Create a unique handle to table your grievance. 4. Your spouse creates their own unique handle as well and post their response to your assertions. 5. The house considers and gives advice. 6. You select the best advice(s) and move forward hopefully as a better/happier couple. |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by maclatunji: 3:04pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
What do you all think? Good or bad idea? |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by TV01(m): 3:12pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
maclatunji:It could well turn out to be a great idea/resource. You may have to selct panels for each unique issue to stop things being dragged allover the place. TV **it does sound a bit "gbeborun'ish" sha !** |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by Mynd44: 3:16pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
**grabs pop-corn** |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by maclatunji: 3:17pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
TV01: Na u sabi, I love carrying out social experiments Anything worth doing at all is worth doing well. If you are going to complain, do so with a view to finding genuine solutions is what I say. |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by maclatunji: 3:18pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
Mynd44: Pours water on pop-corn |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by Nobody: 3:24pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
TV01:True. But gbeborunism, even if passive, is essential for sanity. 2 Likes |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by TV01(m): 3:29pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
maclatunji: I didn't complain - in fact I thought it was a great idea and offered what I thought was an improvement! And I may even consider being part of an appropriately selcted panel for select issues. freshdude2:Abi? Comfort Mac in his unease - no man wants even the merest suggestion that he may be a tatafo ! TV 2 Likes |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by maclatunji: 3:31pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
TV01: I meant complaining spouses not you as an individual. |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by Nobody: 3:33pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
Sounds like a nice idea. But some partners might just not be interested in the "social media marriage counselling". Especially the erring ones Let's see. . . |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by cococandy(f): 3:38pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
How many folks have spouses on NL? And where they already aren't, how many will agree to become members just because they want to be heard too. I don't see an arrogant person who abuses their partner having the humility to answer the summons of the other person on a public forum to air their side of the story. But... It is still worth the try 1 Like |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by Nobody: 3:40pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
TV01:Lol. He'll get it eventually. |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by Busybody2(f): 3:40pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
maclatunji: Glad you have decided to explore your calling as a Psychologist...been a long time coming |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by TV01(m): 3:40pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
maclatunji:Gotcha! Apologies, I misunderstood. Thought so. Let see how it goes - perhaps you should constitute a number of diverse Panels to handle any issues. Of the Marrieds, I'd suggest one panel as follows; You can mix it up if you need specific /tailored input TV |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by TV01(m): 3:42pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
cococandy:Volunteer jo...you have a good head on you. TV |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by maclatunji: 3:43pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
cococandy: It is not for everyone. I am thinking there might be mature couples who might be willing to use this platform; thare are times when a couple just need a little external help to sort them out and then they will be like: "what were we even fighting for?". Those are the kind of people I am thinking would find this interesting. |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by moscobabs(m): 3:45pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
good idea.... |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by maclatunji: 3:46pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
TV01: I am actually not thinking of having a formal set of advisers. I am hoping that bad advisers will get shamed into silence by reactions to their posts. I am neck-deep in too many formal arrangements and with this idea I am not even going to try to make anything formal. |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by Nobody: 3:47pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
[quote a |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by TV01(m): 3:47pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
maclatunji:Be prepared for derailments, threads to mutate all over the place and large servings of beef - you have bben warned - no order = chaos! TV |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by maclatunji: 3:50pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
Busybody2: I guess helping others become calm helps me to keep calm too, |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by Nobody: 3:50pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
cococandy:Hasty generalisation, much? Not all marital disputes are due to abuse. And, even if that's not what you meant, you've got the imperative to be clear in your comments. |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by Nobody: 3:56pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
maclatunji:There was @mutter once upon a time, a remarried divorcee. She was nearly the sole voice of reason around these parts. I wonder why she withdrew. |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by cococandy(f): 4:00pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
I get this part. Well since it's now clear that it's not for everyone, I guess it is settled then. maclatunji: |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by Busybody2(f): 4:07pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
maclatunji: Hmmm, mind over matter stuff...deep TV01: There are many posters in this section whose sole existence & validation is living for the pats they get on the back, so it should be a free for all thingy... 1 Like |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by cococandy(f): 4:09pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
I'm with him. Why should there be a set of formal advisers?that's basically saying everyone else is shut out from trying to help. Besides even the best of advisers on this forum have their 'not so good' days. Same as the trolls have their amazingly sensible days. If the couple can't sift chaff from wheat? Tough luck I say. TV01: 1 Like |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by cococandy(f): 4:11pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by TV01(m): 4:18pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
Busybody2: cococandy: I meant a different panel of how ever many for each individual issue. If it's open season for contributions, how is it any different from what normally obtains? TV |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by Nobody: 4:22pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
Busybody2: Big bumper Where did the 2 come from? How are you babes? @thread the few times I have seen a couple come here to air their issues, it has made things worse. in the cases I have seen, the other party happens to stumble accross what their spouse said and they then go on to tell an opposite story Maybe if they both agree beforehand to discuss their issues, and are both in agreement, then maybe it will work. While you are here mac, I have been thinking of opening a question/answer/reality thread on the romance section, because that is really where the foundation needs to be built on solid ground beofre the "I do", but I havent had time to do this. Maybe some people can help with that. For the married ones, its maintenance & mostly endure and red pant and boxers advise but the singles can still run 440 if they feel that something is not quite right with Mr/Miss Right. |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by cococandy(f): 4:30pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
TV01: |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by jaybee3(m): 4:30pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
Hi Cococandy |
Re: A Thread For Both Parties To Share Their Sides Of The Story by zemaye: 4:32pm On Oct 22, 2014 |
chaircover: |
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