| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by 989900: 7:20pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
koyyes:
Once upon a time, there was a married man,kind,loving and generous to his kids. But he was a chronic cheat. Then suddenly, he contracted Aids and passed on hiv to his wife. He is dead now leaving his kids fatherless and his underweight widdow battling for her life. The same people who told her to pray and look the other way now avoid her like a plague. This is a true life story. I'm not trying to scare you. [s]I'm just trying to let you know that your life and happiness does not revolve around your husband.[/s] Be healthy, be happy,get a job and face your kids. If countless,peaceful confrontation does not change your greedy husband that you no longer can tolerate, Then take a bow and leave that marriage. It's your call. At the 'struck-through', you can't make that decision for anyone, especially, when naturally it is supposed to.
Apart from that, you've made very solid points. |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Carlmax(m): 7:21pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
Am so touched by your story, it just dawned on me how my mum must have felt all the many years of my dad excess cheating. Lord please don't let me be a cheating husband. Thank God my mama no commit suicide, we for "drink am from kettle" . I pray God heals your heart and your marriage. 1 Like |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by notoriousbabe: 7:21pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
oseod:
See ehn, baby, if u gree for me, I will neva cheat on you, infact anything that will make me look at another woman ehn, let thunder strike my eyes...ahn ahn, biko nu
My nickname in school was mr faithful...and my middle name is steadfast fast guy |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by freecocoa(f): 7:22pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
lovat:
my pm Just saw it? But, I'm sorry I don't just reply pms,not unless I know why there was one.  |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Toks2008(m): 7:26pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
koyyes:
Once upon a time, there was a married man,kind,loving and generous to his kids. But he was a chronic cheat. Then suddenly, he contracted Aids and passed on hiv to his wife. He is dead now leaving his kids fatherless and his underweight widdow battling for her life. The same people who told her to pray and look the other way now avoid her like a plague. This is a true life story. I'm not trying to scare you. I'm just trying to let you know that your life and happiness does not revolve around your husband. Be healthy, be happy,get a job and face your kids. If countless,peaceful confrontation does not change your greedy husband that you no longer can tolerate, Then take a bow and leave that marriage. It's your call. [b]Story for the gods... Nobody is safe from HIV or stds because even condom does not really give guaranty protection. If you like continue to change men a million times,95 out of 100 men will cheat on you even if you are hotter than the sexiest lady in the world. For the men, if you must commit the hell bound sin of philandering please and please do your wife the honor of doing it far far far away from her to give her the respect and please for the sake of your life,that of your wife and the children, please use a protection. I want every lady reading this to take this hard pill in and swallow with a cold glass of water,MOST MEN WILL CHEAT ON YOU NO MATTER WHAT and you will be the most clueless and foolish woman to pay back by doing same thing because at the end you will be at the losing end remeber that its a cruel world of men and if you ever allow yourself fall victim of baseless retaliation,you will blame yourself by the time many men use you like rags after you have ben sent packing from your matrimonial home. Wise up.[/b] Thats all. 1 Like |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 7:27pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
ishiamu:
Oloshi. I go shoot u No dey follow my wife dey talk like that.... I no like am  1 Like |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 7:31pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
Toks2008:
[b]Story for the gods...
Nobody is safe from HIV or stds because even condom does not really give guaranty protection.
If you like continue to change men a million times,95 out of 100 men will cheat on you even if you are hotter than the sexiest lady in the world.
For the men, if you must commit the hell bound sin of philandering please and please do your wife the honor of doing it far far far away from her to give her the respect and please for the sake of your life,that of your wife and the children, please use a protection.
I want every lady reading this to take this hard pill in and swallow with a cold glass of water,MOST MEN WILL CHEAT ON YOU NO MATTER WHAT and you will be the most clueless and foolish woman to pay back by doing same thing because at the end you will be at the losing end remeber that its a cruel world of men and if you ever allow yourself fall victim of baseless retaliation,you will blame yourself by the time many men use you like rags after you have ben sent packing from your matrimonial home.
Wise up.[/b]
Thats all. Which pry school did you attend? Can you ppl see what corruption in the educational sector has caused? Its God that will punish those wicked politicians for not paying attention to the educational sector hence these sort of comments. 2 Likes |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 7:31pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
nickibarb:
Please help me. I'm drowning.
I am feeling very depressed right now. My marriage has been mainly peaceful and chaos free. I did my part, cared for my husband, cooked for him, was available to satisfy his sexual needs 24/7, prayed for him, dressed like I did when we were dating, kept my body in tiptop shape even after 2 babies via c/s, everyone around me testifies to that both men and women.
In the wee hours of sunday morning, I was playing around with his phone cause i couldn't sleep. I realised he had WHATSAPP and BBM apps, it was surprising cause I had tried to get him to download them repeatedly so we can send pics to each other but he refused. He said he wasn't interested in them, so I deleted mine. Like every curious cat, I wanted to see what he was up to on it since he didn't tell me that he had finally downloaded it.
I saw that he had been flirting with almost 10 different girls, had met up with some, given money to a lot of them (even though our finances have not been in tiptop shape, but i've been persevering cause I know it is temporary - I have a great job offer with a N200k salary post-nysc but they are not ready for me to resume work yet, so I have no income for now). Before I digress too much, the chat that hurt me the most was a girl who asked my husband to be sending her N30k a month or week, i'm not sure again (my eyes were blurred with tears), and then whenever he needs her, he should just tell her which hotel to check into. Funny enough, they all know he is married with kids, they even ask him about his baby in the course of their chat. Another one that broke my heart was a girl he asked to arrange 15 girls for a political event being hosted by his older politician friend and the girls should be ready to provide TLC for them afterwards. From the messages, it was clear that he slept with this particular girl after that event because she reminded him that the money she received is not a replacement for the one he is supposed to give her (i'm guessing after a previous sexcapade).
I am so heartbroken, I don't know what to do. I feel like I gave my marriage my all, I followed all the rules of a good wife, I read books, i don't know what I could have done differently. My husband told me everyday how much he was in love with me for the 2 years we dated prior to marriage (we've been married 2 years and 6 months). I saw no trait of promiscuity in him. I trusted him 100% so I never policed him concerning his whereabouts (it's not really in my nature to be like that). I never saw this betrayal coming so it has been very difficult for me to deal with this. I had an emotional breakdown on sunday night when he went for a meeting with the new governor of our state (he is related to him). He came home at midnight to see me unconscious. I woke up in a hospital, apparently I had overdosed on pills. At that time, I wanted to die to get away from my life, but now I didn't die, i'm happy he came home in time to rescue me. I mean he could have easily stayed out all night because it was a special day (post-inauguration celebration). I don't know how I could have thought of leaving my two little kids less that 2 years old. [size=18pt]This man has made me CRAZY. If my family hears about this suicidal attempt, they will make me leave him immediately. My fear is, what happens to my little kids, I don't want another woman to come and maltreat them.[/size] We were legally married but not in Nigeria. I don't know if Nigerian courts would recognise our marriage certificate. I don't want to lose my kids. I feel like God has allowed a trial too great for me to handle to come my way. I feel like he over-rated my strength. I am just 27. Isn't it too soon for me to face this kind of life challenge? God knows I married this man out of love, not for money, my parents tried their best for me. They sent me abroad, that's where I met my husband, I didn't even know his family in Nigeria was relatively well-to-do. Some people say if your husband cheats on you, it's nemesis for what you did to other women's husbands. God knows I am innocent. I have tried to find out why my husband who says he loves me everyday, will go out of his way to flirt with girls and sleep with them, (it's not like it's all of them that are coming on to him, he is actually doing most of the chasing). He cannot give me a reason for it, he is just begging me to let it go. I have tried but I'm still hurting, i'm still obsessing about it. How can I heal? I don't want to die and leave my children. How can I stop this pain that is eating me up?
I have read all the articles I can find online about how to get past a cheating husband, it doesn't seem to help. I asked my husband if he used a condom and if I need to go and check for STDs. He is not able to answer me directly but says we can both go and get checked out. I feel like God has forsaken me and I don't deserve it. I have tried to be a good girl all my life. I need this pain in my heart to stop. I need to be sane again. Listen to yourself You have a family that loves you,your husband alienates your mom from you and kids and you accepted it because you want to be a good wife.people can't even say tell your mil,mil doesn't want anything to do with you.if you had been paralyzed from waist down after the push last time from hubby,she wouldn't have cared less neither will she care now. Here you are popping pills like a lunatic with a husband who is organizing runz girls for politicians and catching his own fun,basically a man patronizing prostitutes on a regular basis,confessing to even doing it unprotected and advising that you both go get tested  Is that the sort of life you want to live as a 27 year old Testing yourself every few months for diseases like an ashawo For how long? If you were my sister my advice would be 1. Go get yourself tested for hepatitis B ,HIV and syphylis for starters,hopefully you haven't been infected 2. Tell your parents immediately. They love you unconditionally.your husband doesn't They care about your life and welfare,your husband doesn't Your parents won't knowingly want to harm you,your husband will Your parents have endured so much insult from your husband already,haven't they Is this the price you are willing to pay for the sake of marriage ? If your answer is yes then you are a fool,sorry As for the kids,no courts will give custody of babies to a man unless ... Let me take that back Wth a history of attempted suicide you will be seen as unfit to be a mother and he will win
The evidence is thereNo courts will grant custody of young children to a crazy Do I think he will change? No I don't You either accept it or move on The other option of how u can keep the kids ,if you chose to leave,
if you can still go back overseas,lay low,trick him into sending you for a vacation with the kids and don't go back,this will be tough but people have done it and succeeded
I know two women that did that and they are doing fine now but you can't let a soul in on that plan.
I doubt if you have the balls to do that
You are too clingy
5 Likes |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by MizMyColi(f): 7:41pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
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| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Dyt(f): 7:43pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
egbaguy:
Some men are dogs....... @OP.....my advice is this,get ursef a job,and live ur life!!! Pray to God to touch his heart.....if u file for a divorce,do u knw who d nxt guy will be like? Dnt let ur love for him depreciate....... Some guys bleep other girls just to 'change' menu.....he might still love u wella!!! Where is @dyt sef? Here o I dunno what to write ni Its ok to feel really bad but then trying to commit suicide? That I am so so disappointed considering she got 2 kids Yes some of us love deep I have loved deep and hurt too But did I think of suicide? Well that's me not OP To each its own May Allah help her get over her grief |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Toks2008(m): 7:44pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
oseod:
Which pry school did you attend?
Can you ppl see what corruption in the educational sector has caused?
Its God that will punish those wicked politicians for not paying attention to the educational sector hence these sort of comments. Oga proff abeg which part of my post are you having headache over? Im too intellectually sound to decipher your rethorics ao please communicate effectively. Nevertheless,except you are married at least for 10years without cheating on your wife please dont bother replying to this post.I expect men to catch my drift not boys or men with boys mindset. |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by olushowunm(m): 7:45pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
nickibarb:
Please help me. I'm drowning.
I am feeling very depressed right now. My marriage has been mainly peaceful and chaos free. I did my part, cared for my husband, cooked for him, was available to satisfy his sexual needs 24/7, prayed for him, dressed like I did when we were dating, kept my body in tiptop shape even after 2 babies via c/s, everyone around me testifies to that both men and women.
In the wee hours of sunday morning, I was playing around with his phone cause i couldn't sleep. I realised he had WHATSAPP and BBM apps, it was surprising cause I had tried to get him to download them repeatedly so we can send pics to each other but he refused. He said he wasn't interested in them, so I deleted mine. Like every curious cat, I wanted to see what he was up to on it since he didn't tell me that he had finally downloaded it.
I saw that he had been flirting with almost 10 different girls, had met up with some, given money to a lot of them (even though our finances have not been in tiptop shape, but i've been persevering cause I know it is temporary - I have a great job offer with a N200k salary post-nysc but they are not ready for me to resume work yet, so I have no income for now). Before I digress too much, the chat that hurt me the most was a girl who asked my husband to be sending her N30k a month or week, i'm not sure again (my eyes were blurred with tears), and then whenever he needs her, he should just tell her which hotel to check into. Funny enough, they all know he is married with kids, they even ask him about his baby in the course of their chat. Another one that broke my heart was a girl he asked to arrange 15 girls for a political event being hosted by his older politician friend and the girls should be ready to provide TLC for them afterwards. From the messages, it was clear that he slept with this particular girl after that event because she reminded him that the money she received is not a replacement for the one he is supposed to give her (i'm guessing after a previous sexcapade).
I am so heartbroken, I don't know what to do. I feel like I gave my marriage my all, I followed all the rules of a good wife, I read books, i don't know what I could have done differently. My husband told me everyday how much he was in love with me for the 2 years we dated prior to marriage (we've been married 2 years and 6 months). I saw no trait of promiscuity in him. I trusted him 100% so I never policed him concerning his whereabouts (it's not really in my nature to be like that). I never saw this betrayal coming so it has been very difficult for me to deal with this. I had an emotional breakdown on sunday night when he went for a meeting with the new governor of our state (he is related to him). He came home at midnight to see me unconscious. I woke up in a hospital, apparently I had overdosed on pills. At that time, I wanted to die to get away from my life, but now I didn't die, i'm happy he came home in time to rescue me. I mean he could have easily stayed out all night because it was a special day (post-inauguration celebration). I don't know how I could have thought of leaving my two little kids less that 2 years old. This man has made me CRAZY. If my family hears about this suicidal attempt, they will make me leave him immediately. My fear is, what happens to my little kids, I don't want another woman to come and maltreat them. We were legally married but not in Nigeria. I don't know if Nigerian courts would recognise our marriage certificate. I don't want to lose my kids. I feel like God has allowed a trial too great for me to handle to come my way. I feel like he over-rated my strength. I am just 27. Isn't it too soon for me to face this kind of life challenge? God knows I married this man out of love, not for money, my parents tried their best for me. They sent me abroad, that's where I met my husband, I didn't even know his family in Nigeria was relatively well-to-do. Some people say if your husband cheats on you, it's nemesis for what you did to other women's husbands. God knows I am innocent. I have tried to find out why my husband who says he loves me everyday, will go out of his way to flirt with girls and sleep with them, (it's not like it's all of them that are coming on to him, he is actually doing most of the chasing). He cannot give me a reason for it, he is just begging me to let it go. I have tried but I'm still hurting, i'm still obsessing about it. How can I heal? I don't want to die and leave my children. How can I stop this pain that is eating me up?
I have read all the articles I can find online about how to get past a cheating husband, it doesn't seem to help. I asked my husband if he used a condom and if I need to go and check for STDs. He is not able to answer me directly but says we can both go and get checked out. I feel like God has forsaken me and I don't deserve it. I have tried to be a good girl all my life. I need this pain in my heart to stop. I need to be sane again. ... Madam, you are just too young to understand most things. Love is about self-interest and not some emotional things. Your husband has done his best by respecting you and giving you honor by putting the ring on your finger.. You don't to worry yourself about his escapades... Just ignore his philandering ways and focus on what you know how to do best.. Love and support him. |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by YEM101: 7:47pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
Pls don't commit suicide dearie cos no man worth dying for, deep down in me there is no faithful man, don't trust too much, I ve been in ur shoes before and I knw exactly how u feel, some men even hv nude pics of ladies on their phone/ iPad, concentrate on ur kids and the job u are expecting and try to be HAPPY with or without him. |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by cococandy(f): 7:49pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
Harsh but true Floodgater:
The last time you could swear with your life that he wasn't cheating on you.
You have parents that can help you from the looming danger but you prefare steps to enduring a cheating husband so that you can continue worshipping a man and his family that dont care whether you or your family exist. Infact you have began googling some and hoping/advicing he uses condom.
You prefare to manage a situation that will take you without your children to an abroad of no return instead of seeking ways to salvage them even if it means absconding with them to the abroad you came from. Keep decieving yourself you are staying for your kids and not of your steadily eroding esteem.
This is your second near death experience because of that man, obviously you are capable of bracing a third.
The only reason you are catching the next breath is for your man to live, when you find a more important one, you will know what to do. 1 Like |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Toks2008(m): 7:50pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
egbaguy:
Some men are dogs....... @OP.....my advice is this,get ursef a job,and live ur life!!! Pray to God to touch his heart.....if u file for a divorce,do u knw who d nxt guy will be like? Dnt let ur love for him depreciate....... Some guys bleep other girls just to 'change' menu.....he might still love u wella!!! Where is @dyt sef? You just nailed it. A man can die for a woman yet still cheats on her. men see sex differently from women and a man can sex a woman without any emotion attached and will forget yourface after the act. This is one secret our mothers knew and remained in their matrmonial home. many ladies who leaves their marriage because their hubby cheats on them usually end up with a man who already has a wife thereby commiting same crime they detest against the man wife. |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 7:52pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
nickibarb:
Please help me. I'm drowning.
I am feeling very depressed right now. My marriage has been mainly peaceful and chaos free. I did my part, cared for my husband, cooked for him, was available to satisfy his sexual needs 24/7, prayed for him, dressed like I did when we were dating, kept my body in tiptop shape even after 2 babies via c/s, everyone around me testifies to that both men and women.
In the wee hours of sunday morning, I was playing around with his phone cause i couldn't sleep. I realised he had WHATSAPP and BBM apps, it was surprising cause I had tried to get him to download them repeatedly so we can send pics to each other but he refused. He said he wasn't interested in them, so I deleted mine. Like every curious cat, I wanted to see what he was up to on it since he didn't tell me that he had finally downloaded it.
I saw that he had been flirting with almost 10 different girls, had met up with some, given money to a lot of them (even though our finances have not been in tiptop shape, but i've been persevering cause I know it is temporary - I have a great job offer with a N200k salary post-nysc but they are not ready for me to resume work yet, so I have no income for now). Before I digress too much, the chat that hurt me the most was a girl who asked my husband to be sending her N30k a month or week, i'm not sure again (my eyes were blurred with tears), and then whenever he needs her, he should just tell her which hotel to check into. Funny enough, they all know he is married with kids, they even ask him about his baby in the course of their chat. Another one that broke my heart was a girl he asked to arrange 15 girls for a political event being hosted by his older politician friend and the girls should be ready to provide TLC for them afterwards. From the messages, it was clear that he slept with this particular girl after that event because she reminded him that the money she received is not a replacement for the one he is supposed to give her (i'm guessing after a previous sexcapade).
I am so heartbroken, I don't know what to do. I feel like I gave my marriage my all, I followed all the rules of a good wife, I read books, i don't know what I could have done differently. My husband told me everyday how much he was in love with me for the 2 years we dated prior to marriage (we've been married 2 years and 6 months). I saw no trait of promiscuity in him. I trusted him 100% so I never policed him concerning his whereabouts (it's not really in my nature to be like that). I never saw this betrayal coming so it has been very difficult for me to deal with this. I had an emotional breakdown on sunday night when he went for a meeting with the new governor of our state (he is related to him). He came home at midnight to see me unconscious. I woke up in a hospital, apparently I had overdosed on pills. At that time, I wanted to die to get away from my life, but now I didn't die, i'm happy he came home in time to rescue me. I mean he could have easily stayed out all night because it was a special day (post-inauguration celebration). I don't know how I could have thought of leaving my two little kids less that 2 years old. This man has made me CRAZY. If my family hears about this suicidal attempt, they will make me leave him immediately. My fear is, what happens to my little kids, I don't want another woman to come and maltreat them. We were legally married but not in Nigeria. I don't know if Nigerian courts would recognise our marriage certificate. I don't want to lose my kids. I feel like God has allowed a trial too great for me to handle to come my way. I feel like he over-rated my strength. I am just 27. Isn't it too soon for me to face this kind of life challenge? God knows I married this man out of love, not for money, my parents tried their best for me. They sent me abroad, that's where I met my husband, I didn't even know his family in Nigeria was relatively well-to-do. Some people say if your husband cheats on you, it's nemesis for what you did to other women's husbands. God knows I am innocent. I have tried to find out why my husband who says he loves me everyday, will go out of his way to flirt with girls and sleep with them, (it's not like it's all of them that are coming on to him, he is actually doing most of the chasing). He cannot give me a reason for it, he is just begging me to let it go. I have tried but I'm still hurting, i'm still obsessing about it. How can I heal? I don't want to die and leave my children. How can I stop this pain that is eating me up?
I have read all the articles I can find online about how to get past a cheating husband, it doesn't seem to help. I asked my husband if he used a condom and if I need to go and check for STDs. He is not able to answer me directly but says we can both go and get checked out. I feel like God has forsaken me and I don't deserve it. I have tried to be a good girl all my life. I need this pain in my heart to stop. I need to be sane again. Hmmmmmmmm nickibarb. Don't kill yourself please. It is unfortunate I remember you story well. Remember I told you my parent's story too. When you move from abroad with ur hubby, everything changes. Dunno what to say. |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 7:53pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
Toks2008:
[b]Story for the gods...
Nobody is safe from HIV or stds because even condom does not really give guaranty protection.
If you like continue to change men a million times,95 out of 100 men will cheat on you even if you are hotter than the sexiest lady in the world.
For the men, if you must commit the hell bound sin of philandering please and please do your wife the honor of doing it far far far away from her to give her the respect and please for the sake of your life,that of your wife and the children, please use a protection.
I want every lady reading this to take this hard pill in and swallow with a cold glass of water,MOST MEN WILL CHEAT ON YOU NO MATTER WHAT and you will be the most clueless and foolish woman to pay back by doing same thing because at the end you will be at the losing end remeber that its a cruel world of men and if you ever allow yourself fall victim of baseless retaliation,you will blame yourself by the time many men use you like rags after you have ben sent packing from your matrimonial home.
Wise up.[/b]
Thats all. FYI Most women already know that and more than 45% of married women are also doing what their husbands are doing The difference is that you can never find out They don't go flaunting it Women are better planners and are smoother about such things They just don't make noise about it like you do Every cheating man deserves a woman that will not only cheat but bring in pregnancy from outside and dash him |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Gold45(f): 7:54pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
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| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Gold45(f): 7:54pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
Nickibarb my darling sweethrt, please please and please. U need space!!! U need time to think it over.
U obviously love this man and he loves you too, divorce should not be an option, cheating will worsen things and u'll loose at the end.
Travel 4 at least 2weeks, take one of your kids along: the other one left will ensure u come back, the one with u is a constant reminder not to try anything funny.
Acknowledge the pain dont fight it, it will reduce over time.
Keep in touch with ur hubby, ask all the questions u want answers to. Ask 4 his help to get over the depression.
Feel free to send me a pm. |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by DICKtator: 7:55pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
olushowunm:
... Madam, you are just too young to understand most things. Love is about self-interest and not some emotional things. Your husband has done his best by respecting you and giving you honor by putting the ring on your finger.. You don't to worry yourself about his escapades... Just ignore his philandering ways and focus on what you know how to do best.. Love and support him. I Yeah!! You are so damn right!!! Ignore his philandering life And open for him when he comes home Till you get HIV, syphillis, herpes and the likes!!!!! Support him because it is for better,for worse, till death do them phuckking part!!!!  4 Likes |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Toks2008(m): 7:56pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
YEM101:
Pls don't commit suicide dearie cos no man worth dying for, deep down in me there is no faithful man, don't trust too much, I ve been in ur shoes before and I knw exactly how u feel, some men even hv nude pics of ladies on their phone/ iPad, concentrate on ur kids and the job u are expecting and try to be HAPPY with or without him. A million likes for your advice and one will always decipher words coming from the matured minds and those from todddler mindset. If im a lady i will expect any unpleasant surprise just after i say i do to my man. Only ladies with toddler mentality worry their brain over a mans faithfullness but the matured ladies will warn him to use protection if he ever decides to go astray and also do it very far from her. Men will be men no matter how good you please them. |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 7:56pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
Toks2008:
Oga proff abeg which part of my post are you having headache over?
im too intellectually sound to decipher your rethorics ao please communicate effectively.
Nevertheless,except you are married at least for 10years without cheating on your wife please dont bother replying to this post.I expect men to catch my drift not boys or men with boys mindset. Im sorry ooo...oga no vex I know you went to school ehn *anything that makes you sleep well at night* But didn't your post sound like men will always cheat and women can do nothing about it?
if MOST MEN WILL CHEAT ON YOU NO MATTER WHAT and you will be the most clueless and foolish woman to pay back by doing same thing because at the end you will be at the losing end remeber that its a cruel world of menOh and congrats on your 10 yrs marriage, but if the quote above is your marital doctrine, then I believe that more of the congrats belongs to your wife. |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 7:56pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
Toks2008:
Oga proff abeg which part of my post are you having headache over?
im too intellectually sound to decipher your rethorics ao please communicate effectively.
Nevertheless,except you are married at least for 10years without cheating on your wife please dont bother replying to this post.I expect men to catch my drift not boys or men with boys mindset. Again no vex ooo I no like online argument, E too dey drain data |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 7:57pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
nickibarb:
Please help me. I'm drowning.
I am feeling very depressed right now. My marriage has been mainly peaceful and chaos free. I did my part, cared for my husband, cooked for him, was available to satisfy his sexual needs 24/7, prayed for him, dressed like I did when we were dating, kept my body in tiptop shape even after 2 babies via c/s, everyone around me testifies to that both men and women.
In the wee hours of sunday morning, I was playing around with his phone cause i couldn't sleep. I realised he had WHATSAPP and BBM apps, it was surprising cause I had tried to get him to download them repeatedly so we can send pics to each other but he refused. He said he wasn't interested in them, so I deleted mine. Like every curious cat, I wanted to see what he was up to on it since he didn't tell me that he had finally downloaded it.
I saw that he had been flirting with almost 10 different girls, had met up with some, given money to a lot of them (even though our finances have not been in tiptop shape, but i've been persevering cause I know it is temporary - I have a great job offer with a N200k salary post-nysc but they are not ready for me to resume work yet, so I have no income for now). Before I digress too much, the chat that hurt me the most was a girl who asked my husband to be sending her N30k a month or week, i'm not sure again (my eyes were blurred with tears), and then whenever he needs her, he should just tell her which hotel to check into. Funny enough, they all know he is married with kids, they even ask him about his baby in the course of their chat. Another one that broke my heart was a girl he asked to arrange 15 girls for a political event being hosted by his older politician friend and the girls should be ready to provide TLC for them afterwards. From the messages, it was clear that he slept with this particular girl after that event because she reminded him that the money she received is not a replacement for the one he is supposed to give her (i'm guessing after a previous sexcapade).
I am so heartbroken, I don't know what to do. I feel like I gave my marriage my all, I followed all the rules of a good wife, I read books, i don't know what I could have done differently. My husband told me everyday how much he was in love with me for the 2 years we dated prior to marriage (we've been married 2 years and 6 months). I saw no trait of promiscuity in him. I trusted him 100% so I never policed him concerning his whereabouts (it's not really in my nature to be like that). I never saw this betrayal coming so it has been very difficult for me to deal with this. I had an emotional breakdown on sunday night when he went for a meeting with the new governor of our state (he is related to him). He came home at midnight to see me unconscious. I woke up in a hospital, apparently I had overdosed on pills. At that time, I wanted to die to get away from my life, but now I didn't die, i'm happy he came home in time to rescue me. I mean he could have easily stayed out all night because it was a special day (post-inauguration celebration). I don't know how I could have thought of leaving my two little kids less that 2 years old. This man has made me CRAZY. If my family hears about this suicidal attempt, they will make me leave him immediately. My fear is, what happens to my little kids, I don't want another woman to come and maltreat them. We were legally married but not in Nigeria. I don't know if Nigerian courts would recognise our marriage certificate. I don't want to lose my kids. I feel like God has allowed a trial too great for me to handle to come my way. I feel like he over-rated my strength. I am just 27. Isn't it too soon for me to face this kind of life challenge? God knows I married this man out of love, not for money, my parents tried their best for me. They sent me abroad, that's where I met my husband, I didn't even know his family in Nigeria was relatively well-to-do. Some people say if your husband cheats on you, it's nemesis for what you did to other women's husbands. God knows I am innocent. I have tried to find out why my husband who says he loves me everyday, will go out of his way to flirt with girls and sleep with them, (it's not like it's all of them that are coming on to him, he is actually doing most of the chasing). He cannot give me a reason for it, he is just begging me to let it go. I have tried but I'm still hurting, i'm still obsessing about it. How can I heal? I don't want to die and leave my children. How can I stop this pain that is eating me up?
I have read all the articles I can find online about how to get past a cheating husband, it doesn't seem to help. I asked my husband if he used a condom and if I need to go and check for STDs. He is not able to answer me directly but says we can both go and get checked out. I feel like God has forsaken me and I don't deserve it. I have tried to be a good girl all my life. I need this pain in my heart to stop. I need to be sane again. sorry dear, av bin dre Infact am stil going tru it ryt nw,i guess dose guys don't no wot dey put us tru wen dey cheat but dear tink of ur kid nd jst continue doin ur best as a wyf. Tink abt marriage lyk a partnership business wre as ur kids mata most.U jst saaid u r 27 dear am jst 25 wt a kid nd rily sexy,got guys stl turning dre necks on me bt he stil decide to liv me nd cheat,i Tout I ll die but am stl breathing.kip breathing,it ll al worth it at d end. 1 Like |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 7:57pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
uppa:
are you for real?.....she sleeping wit anoda man wont solve a thing...it will rather destroy her the more How? na karma things nw |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 7:59pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
About 70 percent of married men admitted to cheating on their wives! Another study found that 2/3 of women are not aware of their husband's affair. I can relate to that — It took a long time until I found out myself — when I decided to check his phone.
What about the women? Most statistics found that about 50 to 60 percent of women admitted to having an affair. This one really shocked me. Are there really millions of cheating women in the states? I never even imagined these statistics. For men who think it is their right to cheat Your wives are catching up 1 Like |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 8:00pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
Op nickibarb, are you not the one with the politician husband? You opened a thread about combing your conscience cos of your mother inlaw actions towards you? www.nairaland.com/2309230/ive-been-combing-consciencewas-wrongMadam, no be today. You have been having issues with your marriage for long. See a therapist or a marriage counsellor. Preferably with your hubby. Nairaland(ers) can't solve your problems. All the best!! 2 Likes |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by QueenHeart(f): 8:00pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
Hmmm men will always be men.bt in ur hubby's case he needs cleansing.I wonder d differnt kinds of spirit his carrying inside of him cz of his sleeping wt differnt girls. Honestly no one cn gv u a better advice dan urslf.I want you to seek d face of God,tell him to talk2u shw u d way out after dat u will come up wt a decision.my dear am after ur hlth I knw one of my aunt which her useless waka waka husbnd got her infctd wt hiv bt God4bid ur case will b differnt.please I need u2be strong,ure too young for ds |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 8:03pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
SAMBARRY:
Ruth abokoku die with him na. Shebi na your cross, carry am on your head like cross of calvary till you start depending on drugs to suppress your hiv.
Some of your mates wey tow your line dey Victoria garden cemetery. After 2 years remembrance they're history
Same man who broke her head on a table. Na real 1 chance 1 Like |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Toks2008(m): 8:03pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
oseod:
Im sorry ooo...oga no vex
I know you went to school ehn
*anything that makes you sleep well at night*
But didn't your post sound like men will always cheat and women can do nothing about it
MOST MEN WILL CHEAT ON YOU NO MATTER WHAT and you will be the most clueless and foolish woman to pay back by doing same thing because at the end you will be at the losing end remeber that its a cruel world of men
Oh and congrats on your 10 yrs marriage, but if the quote above is your marital doctrine, then I believe the more of the congrats belong to your wife. Get my point 95% of men will cheat on their woman meaning we have 5% who will not. i have been with a lady for 12years wtout cheatn on her not because of the lobe i hve for her but because i am a believer with great love and fear for GOD but im only one of the 5% Ladies will always lure even a man who does not want to cheat and this is where the problem lies..even a man who does bot want to cheat will be lured by these jezebels and how many men can withstand these sultry beauties. |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by Nobody: 8:08pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
Toks2008:
Get my point
95% of men will cheat on their woman meaning we have 5% who will not.
i have been with a lady for 12years wtout cheatn on her not because of the lobe i hve for her but because i am a believer with great love and fear for GOD but im only one of the 5%
Ladies will always lure even a man who does not want to cheat and this is where the problem lies..even a man who does bot want to cheat will be lured by these jezebels and how many men can withstand these sultry beauties. I'll swallow my pride as a man *dobales* I'm sorry sir, I misunderstood u. |
| Re: Please Save Me From Myself, My Husband Cheated On Me, I Tried To Kill Myself by toksbisola: 8:09pm On Jun 03, 2015 |
@Op; Huh! What can I say; well, first of all it’s really sad that you attempted to take your life; very very sad indeed.
I am really quite upset reading your post that you went this far. Permit me asking; where exactly were your children when you overdosed? They must have been thinking; “OH MUMMY IS ASLEEP”; not knowing that you were half dead; I am glad you came back alive.
Have you confronted your husband? Is he remorseful or is he justifying himself with the analogy of “Men are polygamous in nature therefore they will cheat” One thing to note here is that a man cheats only because he wants to and not because he has to. There is something called self-control; and if you resolve in your heart that you would not cheat on your spouse no matter what; then you certainly would not and this analogy applies to both men and women.
The environment that one finds themselves in sometimes may make it hard for one to walk away; but that does not mean that one cannot avoid the temptation to cheat. It is simply a silly excuse to say I want to explore out of the marital bond as “The marriage bed should be without defilement”.
Now listen up gurl; if you kill yourself because of a philandering husband; I pity you; as I will only give your husband 3 months max; and there would be another Mrs somebody by his side. And if I may ask you this question, what makes you think that the new wife would look after your kids the way you look after them currently if you kill yourself?
In all, there are only 2 options here;
1) Either you leave him and let him carry on with his philandering ways and have a less stressful life along with peace of mind or;
2) If he is remorseful, you can forgive him and stay but also let him show by his action(s) that he would not continuously cheat on you again.
The choice is totally yours; you are the one wearing the shoes and only you know how it pinches. No one else can tell you if to leave or stay.
Part of the problem might be because you depend on him financial; that gives him the freelance to cheat as he knows you would always need money for your upkeep from him. I saw one of your comments that you are a professional in the medical field; my advice to you would be to concentrate on your career and improve yourself. If you are not currently working; then please do get a job and have something in hand doing.
At this moment in time, the most important thing here are your kids; stick around to care for them whether you decide to stay with your husband or not. From your other thread, it is obvious that there are some marital challenges in your home; BE WISE AS YOU SEEK GUIDANCE ON A WAY FORWARD TO HANDLING THEM.
Go for an STD test IMMEDIATELY and check to make sure that you are not carrying any disease(s). I will also ADVICE that your husband should do the same.
In all, you have received a lot of advice from here; be sure to choose wisely what you would follow; AND I REPEAT; you are the only one wearing the shoes and only you know how it pinches. ALL THE BEST.
PS: I read a thread on NL where a woman died of a heartbreak because her husband was a chronic philanderer and now her children are without a mother all because she was fighting hard to stop the husband from cheating on her with different women.
I just mentioned this for you to be aware that a person can indeed die from a heartbreak. So please beware and be wise.
I rest my case 1 Like 1 Share |
