meobizy:

If you reread his original post this is what he has in mind.

meobizy:
They can do this, which is the right step. Visually they can tell if the man is capable enough to cater for her.

meobizy:
Being the legal father affords him more right over the OP in the child's welfare.

theButterfly:

Perhaps that's what the OP has in mind, but that's not what I have in mine. Besides, him asking "Please how do I handle this?" means he's not completely close-minded but is open to suggestions and I gave him mine.

They probably can tell by looking at him, but this would also be a good opportunity for the families to sit and talk things out. Abandoning a woman during pregnancy is no joke and pulling up 16-years later to claim the child with no apology or explanation is ridiculous and reduces the guardians who have raised the child to mere puppets, hence it's crucial for them to question him and he should have no problem answering them b/c he owes them that much and more.

No, it doesn't. In a court of law, the person or persons who raised the child and whom the child knows and calls family have more rights over him/her. Secondly, the other biological parent (in this situation, the mother), or another legal guardian or family member of the child can request the termination of an absent parent’s parental and legal rights if they can prove that the absent parent has acted in a way that does not promote the child’s best interests. The foremost means of proving this is via abandonment of the child, that is, if the absent parent has not seen or contacted the child for at least four months. Another is via neglect. Should they make such a request, their application would be granted in no time b/c this absentee father checks the boxes, as he's just showing up in her life after 16 years of being a no-show.

Apination:
Issues like this dey complex, you can't stop the father from knowing his daughter but it should end there. He gave up the right to her the day he denied her

Ariza:
Tell the girl,she's sixteen and old enough to make decision.

nanaman:


Yes. Issues like this should not be taken or decided with personal feelings.

The man was bad. YES.

Is the father of the child. YES

Did he take care of the child from birth till date. NO

Has she (the girl) being adopted by another family. NO

No where in the law states an irresponsible man should be denied paternity. Lots of things would be posed as the cause of the problem and if the mother denies, DNA would be requested and since the mother knows, truly, the real father is the new man, then, DNA is ruled out.

I already explained what your sister failed to do at the initial stage which brought her to this step.

To custody issue, I stated, the young girl is of age according to law to decide where she wants to live. The court cannot deny the real dad visit and care para-adventure she decides to stay with her mother. Wherever she decides to stay, the man is now "responsible" to law and he should not be denied his right. That's the law bro.

falcon01:
because he gave birth to her doesn't mean he is her father. He denied her, he was never there for her and after he has regret his actions, he wants her back? You think that's fair? The only problem I see here is the girl grew up without knowing the truth. She should have known all this years so that the anger will build inside of her on how the father abandoned her. But no she might forgive him and decide to see him, but if it where me, I have nothing to do with him he's just like a surrogate.

Kylekent59:
You should be very happy for her that she's gonna reunite with her father. That's the best love you can give to her.


God even forgives us our sins, then we unite with him again and he welcomes us.

Just let them have her, you need not be furious. You have done your good part by being there for her. Seal your goodness with good ending and not the other way round.



You cannot deprive her of her real father!!!


*FACT*

nanaman:


Yes. Issues like this should not be taken or decided with personal feelings.

The man was bad. YES.

Is the father of the child. YES

Did he take care of the child from birth till date. NO

Has she (the girl) being adopted by another family. NO

No where in the law states an irresponsible man should be denied paternity. Lots of things would be posed as the cause of the problem and if the mother denies, DNA would be requested and since the mother knows, truly, the real father is the new man, then, DNA is ruled out.

I already explained what your sister failed to do at the initial stage which brought her to this step.

To custody issue, I stated, the young girl is of age according to law to decide where she wants to live. The court cannot deny the real dad visit and care para-adventure she decides to stay with her mother. Wherever she decides to stay, the man is now "responsible" to law and he should not be denied his right. That's the law bro.

Ayotemide:
I have this much to say, any man that impregnates a woman, denies the paternity of her child and puts her integrity and person to question but returns when she had had to be a single parent all her life should know that he is in no place to demand access to that child's life; it was not your child 16years ago, what changed??

niaralandtopuser:
the girl is 16. she could decide not to meet with the father but the op responsibility is to let her know the real father and her real story

Tajbol4splend:
Legally if the guy had denied the pregnancy, does he still have the right to the girl?

nanaman:


Definitely, she can. However, it should be done properly. Let me reiterate, see, put feelings aside and take necessary steps. The man can fight for custody which he knows he won't get but just to tell the woman she has no right to dictate for their daughter.

Like I said, issues like this can be funny at times if the woman does not act fast, the young girl will find it hard to decide. The man to me has facts and knows what to do to get his daughter hence, his decision. He would want to start being a responsible father so as to win the heart of the young girl.

No need for any family meeting, let the court decide for them and luckily, most judges in family court are women, she would get custody. The deed has been done. It is left for amicable solution.

Ladies should learn to close their legs and if they can't, make sure they do court wedding and if it's not visible and their is any child out of wedlock, let the welfare agency take necessary steps to avoid loosing in all sides. Don't put any sentiment, feelings, pleadings from family and friends. It it bornes down to this, sometimes, you might be at the loosing end.

Apination:
Issues like this dey complex, you can't stop the father from knowing his daughter but it should end there. He gave up the right to her the day he denied her

nanaman:


Yes. Issues like this should not be taken or decided with personal feelings.

The man was bad. YES.

Is the father of the child. YES

Did he take care of the child from birth till date. NO

Has she (the girl) being adopted by another family. NO

No where in the law states an irresponsible man should be denied paternity. Lots of things would be posed as the cause of the problem and if the mother denies, DNA would be requested and since the mother knows, truly, the real father is the new man, then, DNA is ruled out.

I already explained what your sister failed to do at the initial stage which brought her to this step.

To custody issue, I stated, the young girl is of age according to law to decide where she wants to live. The court cannot deny the real dad visit and care para-adventure she decides to stay with her mother. Wherever she decides to stay, the man is now "responsible" to law and he should not be denied his right. That's the law bro.

Ariza:
Tell the girl,she's sixteen and old enough to make decision.

GuyWise101:
He abandoned the little girl when she was in the womb, never cared for her when she was growing up...


He now appears from nowhere and started claiming the girl he abandoned just because he has seen that she is nearing to be married just so that he can eat the bride price. (thats wickedness)


If I am in your family I would make sure that he pays every dime we spent on her head, right from her birth.

HenryDion:


It's very obvious you don't know how the law operates, that's why you're spewing this horseshit all over the thread.

Even a biological father, who had been there for her kid since birth can be denied custody if he was an alcoholic, has no job, or seem not be the right figure in the life of the child.

In other words, the law is against irresponsible fathers, and doesn't give a shit about DNA.

A situation whereby the father denied his unborn child. Even after her birth, he never visited or took responsibility for 16 years. Only to come out of the blue to claim responsibility?

He needs about 50 strokes of cane, and be mandated to pay monthly child support, without still having custody of the kid. That is the law operating on an objective stance, without sentiments involved.

Even if the girl child wants to be with the father, the court will see to it that she doesn't. He is utterly irresponsible. His type doesn't even need an audience in court.

It takes much more than sperm to father a child. Op, if that your sister no get a sense, talk sense into her. That irresponsible dude should NEVER have access to that kid.

If that kid is mature, I trust her to blatantly disown the dad herself.

Shalom!