ileobatojo:

Exactly, someone that doesn't want kids firing live bullets on an ongoing basis when his wife's tubes are not tied or her uterus has not removed or something? Imagine the nonsense. Does he realize the pill doesn't work 100%?. He needs to take responsibility for his own birth control if he's so bent on not having any more kids. The wife herself must be a little mad sha. So she's wanted another child and has continued taking daily pills for 3 years? That's some crazy a*ss commitment to something you don't desire.

Men sha can be very selfish!

But I guess we women allow them to . . .

E no be like say di man dey committed to dat 1 pikin decision. If he were he would've gone vasectomy immediately after the 1st child was born. But he's keeping his manhood as "just-in-case" security meanwhile the fertility will determined by age. Selfish man.
BTW, is love not supposed to be critical in marriage? 1 more child for the wife's happiness will not do this hubby any harm. Unless of course he had an agreement with a demon/cult for not more than 1 child in exchange for success.

Mowire: E no be like say di man dey committed to dat 1 pikin decision. If he were he would've gone vasectomy immediately after the 1st child was born. But he's keeping his manhood as "just-in-case" security meanwhile the fertility will determined by age. Selfish man.
BTW, is love not supposed to be critical in marriage? 1 more child for the wife's happiness will not do this hubby any harm. Unless of course he had an agreement with a demon/cult for not more than 1 child in exchange for success.

don't mind the yeye man! He doesn't want to be casatrated so that he will continue flexing outside marriage.if na me eh..... I will stop taking the pills and get pregnant.period!

She better not try it jare. Nothing wrong with having one child, she better not trap him with another child.
Does she want another child to please her in laws or for her self? What is our obession with breeding? Discuss things like this while courting.
Let me not see any thread with the title "my husband changed after our second child".
I would have been on her side if she wanted the child because she wanted one not because of "pressure from in laws", in Laws will always have an oppinion and it will be silly to make major life decisions on the wishes of in laws

dayokanu keep quiet there

papa triplet

dayokanu:

Hope she wont bother the husband with the upbringing if it was her sole decision to have a child

@debrief, wetin be trapping for say make person give im man anoda pikin. If him neva trapped by marriage 10 pikins no go make am trapped. & about the discuss during courtship: many unsustainable agreements are always reached during that time. Na dat time love dey shak & "I wan marry" dey blind person.
As for in-laws, here in SW Naija it is perfectly alright to have an (economically) affordable child just to make your in-law (especially mothers) happy.

Besides it could actually be unfair to the only child.

berem: what a flimsy excuse the man is giving! He dare not tell his inlaws or parents this trash! How proper does he wanna train the child? Does that mean other couples who are well to do who have more than a kid don't train their kids properly?of course she isn't asking for much.if I were to be her I will stop the pills!

:.............. Just pray you won't find yoursef in this type of situation... Are u married to yoursef? It's only God dat can convince the heart of a man.

Let that woman remember that she's the one whose fertile period is limited not the husband.
Why would she agree to one child in the first place? Let her examine her reasons. If the second child is purely for her in-laws then Its not worth it. If she feels the first child's lonely or she on her own just wants one more then she had better get down to it.

Men are lucky o. Outa all the steps a man can take to prevent pregnancy the woman must be responsible.
He can get vasectomy nau. That way he can be sure of not having more kids.

I think it should be a collaborative decision and the woman should not take it upon herself to make it on her own. A pregnancy and child that both couples want is precious and special in its own way. The hubby can become resentful of the pregnancy. On the flip side the wife may start to resent him also for not allowing her to have another baby. They both need to talk it over and come to a decison that is best for their family. A decision that both parties will be satisfied and happy with.

Onainor Samuel :
:.............. Just pray you won't find yoursef in this type of situation... Are u married to yoursef? It's only God dat can convince the heart of a man.

um . . just trying to get something straight here, if a woman says she only wants one child and a man says he wants more, then what?

Well, this is a case of medicine after death! This should have been tabled very well before the I do.

This is a woman thirsting for more children, not conversation about moving houses or buying shoes!
I can bet it that with time, the woman will start resenting the man anyway, this is a slippery slope Mr husband is going on and a recipe for disaster for his home.

Mr husband needs to know It is not solely his decision to make, just like it is not solely her decision to decide to have an abortion and Mr wife needs to pull his heartstrings wellwell! If he is still insisting on finances, mrs wife should try her and make her finances stronger

After cajoling and more cajoling and he is still adamant, years passing by and hubby is still saying no. I personally would stop taking the pills and I will let him know! He can strap up all he likes. This is probably not going to end well if Mr husband insists on No. Wife should also pray and take it to God in prayer.