It seems that an article was written to Sister 2 Sister magazine by a
Caucasian woman who requested a response from black men. I'm so glad she
got what she asked for (and more) !!!This letter was written in response
to an article in Sister 2 Sister:

Dear Jamie:
I'm sorry but I would like to challenge some of your Black male readers.
I am a White female who is engaged to a Black male-good- looking,
educated and loving. I just don't understand a lot of Black female's
attitudes about our relationship. My man decided he wanted me because
the pickings amongst Black women were slim to none. As he said they were
either too fat, too loud, too mean, too argumentative, too needy, too
materialistic or carrying too much excess baggage. Before I became
engaged, whenever I went out I was constantly approached by Black men,
willing to wine and dine me and give me the world. If Black women are so
up in arms about us being with their men, why don't they look at
themselves and make some changes. I am tired of the dirty looks I get
and snide remarks when we're out in public. I would like to hear from
some Black men about why we are so appealing and coveted by them.
Bryant Gumbel just left his wife of 26 years for one of us. Charles
Barkley, Scottie Pippen, the model Tyson Beckford, Montell Williams,
Quincy Jones, James Earl Jones, Harry Belafonte, Sydney Poitier, Kofi
Anan, Cuba Gooding Jr., Don Cornelius, Berry Gordy, Billy Blanks, Larry
Fishburne, Wesley Snipes...I could go on and on. But, right now, I'm a
little angry and that is why I wrote this so hurriedly. Don't be mad
with us White women because so many of your men want us. Get your acts
together and learn from us and we may lead you to treat your men better.
If I'm wrong, Black men, let me know. Disgusted White Girl, Somewhere in
VA.

RESPONSE
Dear Jamie:
I would like to respond to the letter written by A Disgusted White Girl
Let me start by saying that I am a 28-year old black man. I graduated
from one of the most prestigious universities in Atlanta, Georgia with a
Bachelor of Arts Degree in Business Management. I have a good job at a
major corporation and have recently purchased a house. So, I consider
myself to be among the ranks of successful black men. I will not use my
precious time to slander white people. I just want to set the record
straight of why black men date white women. Back in the day, one of the
biggest reasons why black men dated white women was because they were
considered easy. The black girls in my neighborhood were raised in the
church. They were very strict about when they lost their virginity and
who they lost it to. Because of our impatience to wait, brothers would
look for someone who would give it up easy without too much hassle.
So, they turned to the white girls. Nowadays, in my opinion, a lot of
brothers date white women because they are docile and easy to control. A
lot of black men, because of insecurities, fears, and overall
weaknesses, have become intimidated by the strength of our black women.
We are afraid that our woman will be more successful than us, make more
money than us, drive nicer cars and own bigger houses. Because of this
fear, many black men look for a more docile woman. Someone we can
control. I have talked to numerous black men and they continuously
comment on how easy it is to control and walk over their white women. I
just want to set the record straight. I want A Disgusted White Girl to
know that not all successful black men date white women. Brothers like
Ahmad Rashad, Denzel Washington, Michael Jordan, Morris Chestnut, Will
Smith, Blair Underwood, Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds, Samuel L.
Jackson,and Chris Rock all married strong! black women. And, to flip the
scrip, there are numerous white men, in and out of the spot light, who
openly or secretly desire black women over white women. Ted Danson,
Robert DeNiro, and David Bowie to name a few. I just don't want a
disgusted white girl to be misinformed. Stop thinking that because you
are white that you are some type of goddess. Remember, when black
Egyptian Queens like Hatsepshut and Nitorcris were ruling Dynasties and
armies of men in Egypt, you were over in the caves of Europe eating raw
meat and beating each other over the head with clubs. Read your history!
It was the black woman that taught you how to cook and season your food.
It was the black woman that taught you how to raise your children. It
was black women who were breast feeding and raising your babies during
slavery. It is the black woman that had to endure watching their
fathers, husbands, and children beaten, killed, and thrown in jail.
Black women were born with two strikes against them: being! black and
being a woman. And, through all this, Still They Rise! It is because of
the black women's strength, elegance, power, love and beauty that I
could never date anyone except my black Queen. It is not just the outer
beauty that captivates and draws me to them. It is not the fact that
they come in all shapes, sizes, colors and shades that I love them.
Their inner beauty is what I find most appealing about black women.
Their strong spirit, loving and nurturing souls, their integrity, their
ability to overcome great obstacles, their willingness to stand for what
they believe in, and their determination to succeed and reach their
highest potential while enduring great pain and suffering is why I have
fallen in love with black women. I honestly believe that your anger is
geared more toward jealousy and envy more so than snotty looks. If this
were not so, then why do you continuously go to tanning salons to darken
your skin? If you are so proud to be white, then why don't you jus! t be
happy with your pale skin? Why do you continue to inject your lips,
hips, and breasts with unnatural and dangerous substances so you can
look fuller and more voluptuous? I think that your anger is really a
result of you wanting to have what the black woman has. BOTTOM LINE: If
I were looking for a docile woman, someone I can walk over and control,
I would give you a call. But, unfortunately, I am looking for a Virtuous
woman. Someone that can be a good wife and mother to my children.
Someone who can be my best friend and understands my struggles. I am
looking for a soul mate. I am looking for a sister and; unfortunately,
you do not and CANNOT fit the bill. No offense taken, none given.

Signed,
Black Royalty

Wow!! we must pass this on to make the day of the Black Queens of our
acquaintances!

Bold comment! However, the poster (I mean the writer) has gone too far- killing an ant with a sledge hammer, I would say.

Okay...one black man doesnt speak for all. In fact 60 black men married non-black women since the article published.

I'm not racist but I frigging love his response!

This is the kind of topic I can never understand...

Miss_Ife: This is the kind of topic I can never understand...

Exactly, I am more interested in the person not the colour of their skin. There are amazing Black women just as there are amazing White women.

The white woman and the black man that responded to her both have issues. They are not secure about who they are.

What I don't get though is why some Black women give interracial couple the stink eye.

What happened to. . to each his own?!

Sigh!

[quote author=maclatunji]

Exactly, I am more interested in the person not the colour of their skin. There are amazing Black women just as there are amazing White women.

The white woman and the black man that responded to her both have issues. They are not secure about who they are.[/quote


You made a good point....and i like your common sense reply too

...love the black man response...but these two just reminded us that racism is still very much around...

ummmm, marry whomever and don't let it get into your head.

i'm an advocate of mixed relationship/marriage.

white women marry black dude if they have money
black gals don't marry for money but for love and career ladder

Sisi_Kill: What I don't get though is why some Black women give interracial couple the stink eye.

What happened to. . to each his own?!

Sigh!

I guess they are just jealous she got the man instead.

Sisi_Kill: What I don't get though is why some Black women give interracial couple the stink eye.

What happened to. . to each his own?!

Sigh!

The way I don't get why some White women give interracial couples the stink eye. Believe it or not...there are thousands of Black women who could care less and living their lives.

Bottom line...people have preferences and focus on self.

armyofone: ummmm, marry whomever and don't let it get into your head.

i'm an advocate of mixed relationship/marriage.

white women marry black dude if they have money
black gals don't marry for money but for love and career ladder

Someone just got OWNED

dayokanu: Someone just got OWNED

Exactly. I loved the smack down. Though when examined closely he is probably just as off as she is.

ileobatojo:

Exactly. I loved the smack down. Though when examined closely he is probably just as off as she is.

Couldn't have put it this well. Both of them are freaks but she did get what she asked for

TalkItAll:
Dear Jamie:
I'm sorry but I would like to challenge some of your Black male readers.
I am a White female who is engaged to a Black male-good- looking,
educated and loving. I just don't understand a lot of Black female's
attitudes about our relationship. My man decided he wanted me because
the pickings amongst Black women were slim to none. As he said they were
either too fat, too loud, too mean, too argumentative, too needy, too
materialistic or carrying too much excess baggage. Before I became
engaged, whenever I went out I was constantly approached by Black men,
willing to wine and dine me and give me the world. If Black women are so
up in arms about us being with their men, why don't they look at
themselves and make some changes. I am tired of the dirty looks I get
and snide remarks when we're out in public. I would like to hear from
some Black men about why we are so appealing and coveted by them.
Bryant Gumbel just left his wife of 26 years for one of us. Charles
Barkley, Scottie Pippen, the model Tyson Beckford, Montell Williams,
Quincy Jones, James Earl Jones, Harry Belafonte, Sydney Poitier, Kofi
Anan, Cuba Gooding Jr., Don Cornelius, Berry Gordy, Billy Blanks, Larry
Fishburne, Wesley Snipes...I could go on and on. But, right now, I'm a
little angry and that is why I wrote this so hurriedly. Don't be mad
with us White women because so many of your men want us. Get your acts
together and learn from us and we may lead you to treat your men better.
If I'm wrong, Black men, let me know. Disgusted White Girl, Somewhere in
VA.

I love this white girl.

To be brutally frank, the value proposition of an average black woman is very low.

TalkItAll:
RESPONSE
Dear Jamie:
I would like to respond to the letter written by A Disgusted White Girl
Let me start by saying that I am a 28-year old black man. I graduated
from one of the most prestigious universities in Atlanta, Georgia with a
Bachelor of Arts Degree in Business Management. I have a good job at a
major corporation and have recently purchased a house. So, I consider
myself to be among the ranks of successful black men. I will not use my
precious time to slander white people. I just want to set the record
straight of why black men date white women. Back in the day, one of the
biggest reasons why black men dated white women was because they were
considered easy. The black girls in my neighborhood were raised in the
church. They were very strict about when they lost their virginity and
who they lost it to. Because of our impatience to wait, brothers would
look for someone who would give it up easy without too much hassle.
So, they turned to the white girls. Nowadays, in my opinion, a lot of
brothers date white women because they are docile and easy to control. A
lot of black men, because of insecurities, fears, and overall
weaknesses, have become intimidated by the strength of our black women.
We are afraid that our woman will be more successful than us, make more
money than us, drive nicer cars and own bigger houses. Because of this
fear, many black men look for a more docile woman. Someone we can
control. I have talked to numerous black men and they continuously
comment on how easy it is to control and walk over their white women. I
just want to set the record straight. I want A Disgusted White Girl to
know that not all successful black men date white women. Brothers like
Ahmad Rashad, Denzel Washington, Michael Jordan, Morris Chestnut, Will
Smith, Blair Underwood, Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds, Samuel L.
Jackson,and Chris Rock all married strong! black women. And, to flip the
scrip, there are numerous white men, in and out of the spot light, who
openly or secretly desire black women over white women. Ted Danson,
Robert DeNiro, and David Bowie to name a few. I just don't want a
disgusted white girl to be misinformed. Stop thinking that because you
are white that you are some type of goddess. Remember, when black
Egyptian Queens like Hatsepshut and Nitorcris were ruling Dynasties and
armies of men in Egypt, you were over in the caves of Europe eating raw
meat and beating each other over the head with clubs. Read your history!
It was the black woman that taught you how to cook and season your food.
It was the black woman that taught you how to raise your children. It
was black women who were breast feeding and raising your babies during
slavery. It is the black woman that had to endure watching their
fathers, husbands, and children beaten, killed, and thrown in jail.
Black women were born with two strikes against them: being! black and
being a woman. And, through all this, Still They Rise! It is because of
the black women's strength, elegance, power, love and beauty that I
could never date anyone except my black Queen. It is not just the outer
beauty that captivates and draws me to them. It is not the fact that
they come in all shapes, sizes, colors and shades that I love them.
Their inner beauty is what I find most appealing about black women.
Their strong spirit, loving and nurturing souls, their integrity, their
ability to overcome great obstacles, their willingness to stand for what
they believe in, and their determination to succeed and reach their
highest potential while enduring great pain and suffering is why I have
fallen in love with black women. I honestly believe that your anger is
geared more toward jealousy and envy more so than snotty looks. If this
were not so, then why do you continuously go to tanning salons to darken
your skin? If you are so proud to be white, then why don't you jus! t be
happy with your pale skin? Why do you continue to inject your lips,
hips, and breasts with unnatural and dangerous substances so you can
look fuller and more voluptuous? I think that your anger is really a
result of you wanting to have what the black woman has. BOTTOM LINE: If
I were looking for a docile woman, someone I can walk over and control,
I would give you a call. But, unfortunately, I am looking for a Virtuous
woman. Someone that can be a good wife and mother to my children.
Someone who can be my best friend and understands my struggles. I am
looking for a soul mate. I am looking for a sister and; unfortunately,
you do not and CANNOT fit the bill. No offense taken, none given.

Signed,
Black Royalty

Wow!! we must pass this on to make the day of the Black Queens of our
acquaintances!

This is a typical "I-must-defend-them-because-they-are-my-own", black panther, brother of Islam moronic person?

What strength? How is rudeness, classlessness and shrew-lyness a sign of strength?

How can such a person be a good wife or give me the joy of wanting her to be mother of my kids?

How can a black man have "fear" of their black woman being more successful than them but do not have this "fear" for white woman? Which of the 2 have better odds of being more successful than the black man?

Bloody cretin!

sagamite you have come again

cotton101: sagamite you have come again

I keep it straight and brutally honest, sweetie.

I don't take sides except the side of objectivity.

Sagamite:

I keep it straight and brutally honest, sweetie.

I don't take sides except the side of objectivity.

I was waiting for that side. And u no kuku disappoint.

sagamite not all black women are the same - thats the point I tried to make.

Hmm....last time i have checked flaws come in all shapes and shades.

I will have a better chance of learning perfection from an alien.

cotton101: sagamite not all black women are the same - thats the point I tried to make.

Sagamite:

I love this white girl.

To be brutally frank, the value proposition of an average black woman is very low.

Nuff said.

I treat people as individuals (as it is obvious on NL), but if I am asked to generalise, then I would definitely not be giving black women high marks.

Some individual black women might not only have high marks, they will have excellent marks, but majority would have very low marks and they drive the average mark down drastically.

When you black women see your fellow black women (that maybe even friends) being shytheads instead of you thinking it is acceptable and men should just take it, correct the women. Don't let them spoil your identity.

Start with that philosophy on NL to get practice.

Shollypopz is an ideal representation of the low marks. You should not want people seeing her as part of your average score.

Sagamite

It is not up to grown women to correct grown women just like it is not up to grown men to correct grown men. It is obvious grown men arent doing that seeing black men are on the bottom of the totem pole. Is it the responsibilities of other to tell you which way to go? No. That's parents' job.

Who decide what is norm or expected?

Mrs.Chima:
Sagamite

It is not up to grown women to correct grown women just like it is not up to grown men to correct grown men. It is obvious grown men arent doing that seeing black men are on the bottom of the totem pole. Is it the responsibilities of other to tell you which way to go? No. That's parents' job.

Who decide what is norm or expected?

Fair enough point.

But it does leave the risk of a negative generalisation and generalisation is a pertinent, useful and frequently used tool for formulating some opinions.

My perception of modern day black women based on simple generalisation is quite negative based purely on apt objectivity.

^^ Or maybe, just maybe, you prefer the "exciting", extroverted, dare devil, pretty but bad mannered girls over the "dull", introverted, shy but well mannered intelligent girls.

Me thinks you're probably mixing with your average "wrong" black girl.

Anyway, rudeness is not specific to any ethnic group. You've also got rude Caucasian, Asian, Negroid girls too.

Efemena_xy: ^^ Or maybe, just maybe, you prefer the "exciting", extroverted, dare devil, pretty but bad mannered girls over the "dull", introverted, shy but well mannered intelligent girls.

Me thinks you're probably mixing with your average "wrong" black girl.

Anyway, rudeness is not specific to any ethnic group. You've also got rude Caucasian, Asian, Negroid girls too.

Why can't a girl be "exciting", pretty, intelligent, well mannered and extroverted/introverted (really don't care as long as she is not a tomboy)?

Why do I have to go for a "dull" girl?

Why do most of you feel the need to lecture me to compromise on my preference/happiness to take what YOU find as ideal (i.e. marriage, committed relationship)?

I want a beautiful woman with a good personality. Simples!

https://www.nairaland.com/312247/gf-material-vs-wife-material/1#4390898

That happens to be quite a rare phenomena. Majority of women have one or the other.

Beautiful girls have their head up their arsses because they feel they have options and some daft arsse men kiss their arsse. They only change when the looks starts fading and they need to tie something down before the BBE or UB date.

Ugly girls develop good personality to compensate for what nature has not given them.

I see this so frequently as I am very observant.

It is rare to see girls that have both. I have seen some and I am the type that is vocal because I tell them. I praise the right women alot, just as much as I condemn the wrong women.

I will not compromise when I have other options like "be single and fire them"!

Rudeness is not specific to any ethnic group but by and large Negroid girls are the worst by a mile that I have seen. Any second worst is like Usain Bolt running with my high school athletics team. It is somehow culturally embedded.

In terms of me mixing with the wrong black girls, then majority of black men must be mixing with the wrong black women and majority of men of other races must be meeting the wrong black women. Actually, we all mix with the same small pool of black women while the majority rest are locked in underground dungeons since we all have similar views about black women. You know the "strong" black woman, Hulk Hogan personality types.

Efemena_xy: ^^ Or maybe, just maybe, you prefer the "exciting", extroverted, dare devil, pretty but bad mannered girls over the "dull", introverted, shy but well mannered intelligent girls.

Me thinks you're probably mixing with your average "wrong" black girl.

Anyway, rudeness is not specific to any ethnic group. You've also got rude Caucasian, Asian, Negroid girls too.

Agree.....However having said that, that sort of behaviour is on average more common within certain Ethnic groups.

I'll go further and say even within that Particular Ethnic group, that sort of behaviour is evidently more common in certain countries .

Sisi_Kill: What I don't get though is why some Black women give interracial couple the stink eye.

What happened to. . to each his own?!

Sigh!

Exactly....The same way I don't thr reason why some Black Men give interracial couples bad eye.

Just because I choose not to date outside my race does not mean others should follow suit.

One Sri Lankan hotness I was trying to hook up with once (I failed even though she likes me, family expectations hassle too much), asked me:

"I am not trying to be rude, but most black girls just come across as angry".

A Somali one I told that Naija girls are rude tried to defend her sisters, I took her clubbing and it did not take long for her to see what I was talking about.

Two cases I pointed out to her and she could not argue:

- One, another different Somali girl, very very cute, was going across the club and some riff-raff looking, my-refugee-boat-just-landed desperado was trying to hook up with her and started pulling her. The girl slightly wrestled her hand off him and politely said "No" with a little smile and tried to continue walking despite him being in front of her and thrusting his crotch forward. I saw her avoid his path on her way back

- The second, Naija girl with make-up to the hilt, 6-inch platforms, that was standing next to us all night with her friend (basically just posing, not dancing, only their to soak attention all night), had a well dressed good-looking guy that has been standing next to her for a few minutes turned and tried to start a conversation. As he moved to talk into her ears because of loud music, she turned gave him a nasty look and then gently pushed her friend a couple of steps (like "lets move away from this pervert", and then continued shaking her asset softly feeling all proud. The guy just gently took the embarassment and looked away without saying a word.

I asked the Somali girl: "Can you see the contrast I was telling you about?"

@Sagamite, just seen the thread you pointed me to.

Dude, your expectations are way too high. You can't eat your cake and have it! Besides, I'm tempted to ask - how do you as a person, score on that rigid template of yours self?

Besides, haven't you heard the saying: "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"? You seem to place a lot of value on the book cover and not the contents. Nevertheless, no situation is "unworkable". Where there is a will, there is a way.

Now, you claim that the not-so-fine girls make up for their shortcomings with very good / pleasant personalities, abi? So, why not take one of these not-so-good-looking girls that's got everything else (intelligence, excellent personality and manners, etc) - and take her to Harley Street for some cosmetic workover??

I'm sure waking up to your double DD bust sized, botox induced chic every morning would more than compensate for the that little "dent" to your finances...no?

Efemena_xy: @Sagamite, just seen the thread you pointed me to.

Dude, your expectations are way too high. You can't eat your cake and have it! Besides, I'm tempted to ask - how do you as a person, score on that rigid template of yours self?

Efe, I am the ish! I bring value. Ask ronkebp.

What is so high about my expectations.

On 21 out 30? Only 70%, not 99.9999%? Haba!

Efemena_xy:
Besides, haven't you heard the saying: "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder"? You seem to place a lot of looks on the book cover and not the contents. Nevertheless, no situation is "unworkable". Where there is a will, there is a way.

Don't tell me to compromise again.

Why can't the book look as good as the content just like Macmillan/Wileys do it?

Efemena_xy:
Now, you claim that the not-so-fine girls make up for their shortcomings with very good / pleasant personalities, abi? So, why not take one of these not-so-good-looking girls that's got everything else (intelligence, excellent personality and manners, etc) - and take her to Harley Street for some cosmetic workover??

I'm sure waking up to your double DD bust sized, botox induced chic every morning would more than compensate for the that little "dent" to your finances...no?

I eat only organic food. Not GM-modified.

As long as there are few girls with both beauty and personality, and I have met some, I would keep trying my luck in those quarters.

I would have given another story but I no get time now.

Exactly....The same way I don't the reason why some Black Men give interracial couples bad eye.

Just because I choose not to date outside my race does not mean others should follow suit.[/quote] Thank you... I don't know peoples' problem,just because you choose to be something,does that mean everyone else should be like you? We all have our tastes and they differ,so leave everyone to he or her taste... Why will a set of twins not marry the same gal? TASTE VARIATION