debrief08: Miss Ife, I understand and you have said everything, she weighed it all and that's what she wants. Don't feel guilty just do your best to call and visit as much as you can
Jidegirl, I don't always say the right thing, I can only say what I think which may be right or wrong. There is no right or wrong, right to you may be wrong to someone else.

debrief08: Oga Tunji Good morning to you too, please kindly get off my back ehnn and find fulfilment somewhere else this monday morning.
Debrief owes you nothing on nairaland, find satisfaction with real people and real things in life stop following peoples wives up and down Nairaland, I really don't care what you think oh, find your level, face your front.
Me I no send you. When you see me waka pass because apart from views I have no relationship with you. I share my points and am not here to impress you. Get over it, you can't control me what I say or how I say it. Get off.
Thank you and enjoy your day, hope I said it well?
I won't be looking into anything by the way, you should look into following married women and jumping into wetin no cencern you.

Ujujoan: I don't think any SANE person will choose a home, rather a life surrounded by her friends and family . . . I could be wrong dou!

Obviously the woman sees herself as a burden and let's face it, that's what she will be. But she has earned the right to be that burden!

It's like shipping your kids off to bruden school because school run will be stressful. Like buying your food from a restaurant cos cooking will be strefful!

I live in Nigeria and old people's home are not really that common around here, but even if they were, I wont comit any of my family to a home . . . . good staff or not!

debrief08: Oga Tunji Good morning to you too, please kindly get off my back ehnn and find fulfilment somewhere else this monday morning.
Debrief owes you nothing on nairaland, find satisfaction with real people and real things in life stop following peoples wives up and down Nairaland, I really don't care what you think oh, find your level, face your front.
Me I no send you. When you see me waka pass because apart from views I have no relationship with you. I share my points and am not here to impress you. Get over it, you can't control me what I say or how I say it. Get off.

debrief08: Oga Seina, I respect you a lot that's why am responding, usually anything regardling Tunji especially his snide remarks and attacks I ignore.
He believes everyone must live in a box he has created, he regulalry makes condescending comments. If you followed this thread, the part he quoted Jidegirl was actually giving me a compliment and I was correcting an impression she had of me that I always post right answers. I don't, and I always say it, when I am wrong, am first to admit it.
I am not proud and have nothing against corrections, Tunji am sorry comes accross as controling and condesending, he ropes you into what you think is a logical arguement and then says stuff like "women you people are never satisfied " I can't take generalisation.
I have tried really tried to be patient and reason with him but there is no point, he is who he is I am who I am, I don't go around bothering him and he really shouldn't do the same. See how he took a friendly innocent exchange and tried to turn it to something else, if I was silly, I would start thinking that Jide actually meant bad when she didn't. He likes adding salt to innocent issues and comes accross with bantering when you dot agree with him like a market woman, later when he has put fire he will come and sneak and pretend to be a peace maker.
He should spare me, I don't get into these things and I ignore him he should do the same

Ujujoan: ^^^ I wish that were true . . . We have enough confusionsists here as it is!

maclatunji:

Hey! Maybe, I don't get the full picture sometimes but I am never a "confusionist". Don't get me started with you.

debrief08: Get to me ke? I normally ignore him while he earnestly seeks the attention he obviously lacks in real life but today when he clearly seeks to cause wahala between two women having a mature discussion I have to tell him off.
Person wey I dey talk to no get beef na man carry talk wa turn am to unnecessary wahala. God pass am sha.

Ujujoan:

ooooooohhhhhh . . . I'm trembling in my boots and peeing in my pants!

Siena:

Do you see this thread as pointless?

Miss_Ife: The good thing about it all is that I had the opportunity to discuss this with my mom, and since I know her opinion on retirement home and what she wants when she gets old, I can keep this in mind for the future.

As for my grandmother, I also can't believe that is what she really wants, I tried to tell her that helping people and taking care of family members is not only a duty but something we can enjoy, but she wouldn't change her mind. I wonder... will try to talk to some other uncles/aunties to get their opinion.

tpia1:

Yes.

Asking a question- how do you take care of the elderly in your family, is different from i need nlers to come and validate me for whatever.

jidegirl12: So what arrangement/ care plan would you have for your aged mom or dad Mac?

Emary: It's not the aged themselves that are burdens. It is the accompanying ailments, loss of memories and frustrations that come with extreme aging. If you have cared for a sick child, imagine it on a larger scale when they are not in good health.

Miss_Ife:

I actually asked that question. I talked about my own situation just to let people understand why I was asking. I would appreciate it if you'd talk about your own situation, how you actually take care of the elderly in your family. You don't have to comment what i wrote about my own.

jidegirl12: And the frustrations you are talking about is no different from dealing with a 2 year old when you have to repeat yourself gazillions times before they chose to listen or not.... it's not a piece of cake I know it but we have to be ready to care for them when that stage comes.... life's not all about us... we can't live it for ourselves only( mom's quote ).