Hi. My friend is in a fix and doesn't know what to do about his relationship with his girlfriend.
It started like this.
They met while in secondary school and fell head over heels in love . They drifted after secondary school but both secretly nursed hopes of getting back together. A few years passed and they both graduated from university and hooked up again briefly. He traveled abroad to further his studies and they grew even closer in his absence. They were really close. He loved her to bits and believed she loved him to bits too. They often spent hours talking or chatting and exchanged details of their daily lives every blessed day. He calls her when he goes for walks and she does same too. She even tells him when she is going to poo . He knew every detail down to when she starts menstruating and when she stops. She had doubts about his sincerity initially but my friend dispelled these doubts by coming down to Nigeria to see her parents and telling them his plans for their daughter. He promised to come back after his MSc and he did. Upon his return she would spend virtually every weekend with him. He introduced her to his friends as the one. (my friend is quite a serious minded fellow so he wasn't kidding about she being the one). However she never introduced him to her friends. In fact she tried everything possible to prevent him from seeing her friends. . My friend brushed this aside and felt maybe she wasn't quite ready to take that leap yet. However as time went by, the frequency of her visits, calls and chats on BBM dropped. She even managed to visit one day and spent the whole of the visit chatting with her BBM contacts. . At this point, my friend was still jobless and had spent quite a few months in Nigeria.She locks her fones while his phone is devoid of any password. He gave her access to everything personal he had.She claimed she couldn't chat or call or receive calls or visit as much as she used to because she was busy with her job. He confided in me and I told him he probably was thinking too much into nothing. As fate would have it, my friend has got a job with an oil company now and suddenly the girl has started calling again and even went as far as asking him how much he was being paid. lol. Can u imagine her audacity. I forgot to mention they stopped sharing details of their daily lives after my friend came back and had spent a few months in Nigeria (Initial gra gra don wear off i guess). She started answering his questions with questions or dismissing them outright. Now though, she answers all that he asks and even adds what she wasn't asked . My friend is worried she is the type that only sticks around when the going is good and jumps ship at the slightest sign of trouble.
What do you all think he should do? (There are two sides to every story though but this is the side i have got so far. Will post hers if i can get her own version.)

9icetoo: Hi. My friend is in a fix and doesn't know what to do about his relationship with his girlfriend.
It started like this.
They met while in secondary school and fell head over heels in love . They drifted after secondary school but both secretly nursed hopes of getting back together. A few years passed and they both graduated from university and hooked up again briefly. He traveled abroad to further his studies and they grew even closer in his absence. They were really close. He loved her to bits and believed she loved him to bits too. They often spent hours talking or chatting and exchanged details of their daily lives every blessed day. He calls her when he goes for walks and she does same too. She even tells him when she is going to poo . He knew every detail down to when she starts menstruating and when she stops. She had doubts about his sincerity initially but my friend dispelled these doubts by coming down to Nigeria to see her parents and telling them his plans for their daughter. He promised to come back after his MSc and he did. Upon his return she would spend virtually every weekend with him. He introduced her to his friends as the one. (my friend is quite a serious minded fellow so he wasn't kidding about she being the one). However she never introduced him to her friends. In fact she tried everything possible to prevent him from seeing her friends. . My friend brushed this aside and felt maybe she wasn't quite ready to take that leap yet. However as time went by, the frequency of her visits, calls and chats on BBM dropped. She even managed to visit one day and spent the whole of the visit chatting with her BBM contacts. . At this point, my friend was still jobless and had spent quite a few months in Nigeria.She locks her fones while his phone is devoid of any password. He gave her access to everything personal he had.She claimed she couldn't chat or call or receive calls or visit as much as she used to because she was busy with her job. He confided in me and I told him he probably was thinking too much into nothing. As fate would have it, my friend has got a job with an oil company now and suddenly the girl has started calling again and even went as far as asking him how much he was being paid. lol. Can u imagine her audacity. I forgot to mention they stopped sharing details of their daily lives after my friend came back and had spent a few months in Nigeria (Initial gra gra don wear off i guess). She started answering his questions with questions or dismissing them outright. Now though, she answers all that he asks and even adds what she wasn't asked . My friend is worried she is the type that only sticks around when the going is good and jumps ship at the slightest sign of trouble.
What do you all think he should do? (There are two sides to every story though but this is the side i have got so far. Will post hers if i can get her own version.)

I was thinking she had someone else, why doesn't he ask her the question directly?

@ ruddysmith, he doesn't want to sound insecure by asking her if she has someone else.

Tell your friend to guard his heart, cuz this girl is carrying a big hammer to smash it. Lol

9icetoo: @ ruddysmith, he doesn't want to sound insecure by asking her if she has someone else.

He must find a way 2 ask her. btw being insecure is not wrong, far from it.

Most Girls are guilty of these, they claim to love you(fake love) and all that, but the truth is- Its the potential in you they are actually loving and not you(the potential carrier). I hate such girls with passion. They only love you for "what you are" or "what you are gonna be", but not "who you are". My principle is simple: if you are not gonna love me for who I am (with or without job, with or without money), then mess off!

OP, tell your friend to drop her ASAP, else when he runs into a ditch tomorrow, she is gonna elope with another man! Even if she doesn't, she will make his house uncomfortable to live in.
Its obvious she fell in love with his wealthy background right from secondary school, and that continued after he travelled out, with the hope that when he comes back, he will get a job with a Very Big Coy. When that didn't happen on time, she jumped ship. Typical Nigerian Girl "me I don't want to suffer o" kind of mentality. Gosh!!! These girls are terrible. Even the ones here aren't even better.

Just tell him to drop her now, else, he will be here himself soon to open another thread.

op i think ur friend is right,

That's what you get 4rm dating girls from poor background.

Get her own side of the story, then hit me

poshdiva: there are two types of guys
we have NEPA and we have Generator
am sure you know what that means
let your friend figure out the one he is in her life




although i think he is the generator

hahahahaha, nice one there, that was funny.
my POV, i'd say [size=14pt]DITCH[/size] !

He could put her to test,act like your unemployed and broke 4 sometime,watch hw she handles it..

[size=20pt]OP Your friend is dealing with gold digger and a thief. Good for nothing opportunity seeker. This is no love. He had better dump her now or cry later[/size]. I dey laugh...

chidyhels: He could put her to test,act like your unemployed and broke 4 sometime,watch hw she handles it..

Bingo! Spot on! Poster, let your friend do the above and see her reaction.

IMO, she is there only when things are rosy and blissful. When the tides are turned, she is another person-for better for stay, for worse for go!

chidyhels: He could put her to test,act like your unemployed and broke 4 sometime,watch hw she handles it..

No time

chidyhels: He could put her to test,act like your unemployed and broke 4 sometime,watch hw she handles it..

Wow! I didnt even see this... can I hug you? I respect ladies with sense like this.

OP TELL YOUR FRIEND TO TAKE THIS ADVISE...I BELIEVE SHE WILL MOST LIKE FAIL IT.IT IS CRYSTAL CLEAR!

2sexy: Wow! I didnt even see this... can I hug you? I respect ladies with sense like this.

OP TELL YOUR FRIEND TO TAKE THIS ADVISE...I BELIEVE SHE WILL MOST LIKE FAIL IT.IT IS CRYSTAL CLEAR!

You well so?

What is there to say, she is going to use your friend as a stepping stone. Once she meets someone in your friends company who is richer, she will move on to that person.
Your friend should cut his losses now and look for another girl.

wissezy: That's what you get 4rm dating girls from poor background.

She is actually from a rich background and a bit spoilt.

Nextworldnx: Most Girls are guilty of these, they claim to love you(fake love) and all that, but the truth is- Its the potential in you they are actually loving and not you(the potential carrier). I hate such girls with passion. They only love you for "what you are" or "what you are gonna be", but not "who you are". My principle is simple: if you are not gonna love me for who I am (with or without job, with or without money), then mess off!

OP, tell your friend to drop her ASAP, else when he runs into a ditch tomorrow, she is gonna elope with another man! Even if she doesn't, she will make his house uncomfortable to live in.
Its obvious she fell in love with his wealthy background right from secondary school, and that continued after he travelled out, with the hope that when he comes back, he will get a job with a Very Big Coy. When that didn't happen on time, she jumped ship. Typical Nigerian Girl "me I don't want to suffer o" kind of mentality. Gosh!!! These girls are terrible. Even the ones here aren't even better.

Just tell him to drop her now, else, he will be here himself soon to open another thread.

He is so lost in love he won't accept dropping her. I don use style tell am the same thing though but he just won't listen. However, i think these mails should convince him.

Nextworldnx: Most Girls are guilty of these, they claim to love you(fake love) and all that, but the truth is- Its the potential in you they are actually loving and not you(the potential carrier). I hate such girls with passion. They only love you for "what you are" or "what you are gonna be", but not "who you are". My principle is simple: if you are not gonna love me for who I am (with or without job, with or without money), then Fu.+ck off!

OP, tell your friend to drop her ASAP, else when he runs into a ditch tomorrow, she is gonna elope with another man! Even if she doesn't, she will make his house uncomfortable to live in.
Its obvious she fell in love with his wealthy background right from secondary school, and that continued after he travelled out, with the hope that when he comes back, he will get a job with a Very Big Coy. When that didn't happen on time, she jumped ship. Typical Nigerian Girl "me I don't want to suffer o" kind of mentality. Gosh!!! These girls are terrible. Even the ones here aren't even better.

Just tell him to drop her now, else, he will be here himself soon to open another thread.

At the bolded... is the reason why I am fighting tooth and nail to find someone that will stay with me now and not when I am made. It is the same reason I would always probably find it hard to believe that someone loves when I am made. A very bad situation. And this why when some guys make some cash, they tend to use ladies any how.

9icetoo:
He is so lost in love he won't accept dropping her. I don use style tell am the same thing though but he just won't listen. However, i think these mails should convince him.

Bro, you have tried. It is obvious he is a very close friend to you. The truth is that in a case like this, the best that you can do is advise while the decision lies with your friend.

I have been in the that shoes before and when my friend, elder brother even a my own sister were advising me, I didnt listen to them despite the fact I had started seeing elements of the truth but I was blindly in love lol.

My friend even went as far as telling me that one of the staff at a top bank wanted to seduce him just because she saw some millions paid into his bank account by a top oil company in Nigeria. Is that not someone else girlfriend? People may not believe it but according to my friend, the said bank staff went na+ked just because of money.

Bro, most naija ladies have completely lost it when it comes to stuffs like this. They love that potential and not you. My own ex once told me that I dont plan ahead but a few years down the road, she wants to come back to the same person who she accused of not planning ahead. Why? because she has finished exploring and the guy she left me for didnt have any plan for her other than just fvcking her. When she realised it, she wanted to come back to me she saw that I am now a graduate. In her mind, she sees that I would get a job and then settle down. She tried everything but has finally given up.

In the end, it's your friend's decision that really matter. And I believe that experience is the best teacher, so life has taught me.

Thanks 2sexy. I will definitely show him your post. I don't know about the test stuff but I will tell him to try and test her though. what manner of test he will come up with, i do not know but i will keep you guys posted. He has read some of the comments and said you guys don't understand how difficult it is for him. I fear say them don give my guy belusom. Lol.

9icetoo,

Maybe you should link your friend with 2sexy as per mentorship hehehe. He has been there, done that too. So he might help him in one way or the other.

Speaking from a lady's POV, the babe is not ready to experience the thin side of life, only the thick side. Unfortunately, life isn't so; it is a mix of thick and thin.

In his case, love is blind. Apart from you, has he told anyone else? I feel he should discuss with his father about it; let him hear what he has to say. Our fathers have seen much more than us, so he might open his eyes to what is hidden from him.

When a young man is confused about love matters, let him seek the counsel of elders. What a young man sees standing, an elder already sees while sitting.

where have you been?

ferhyntorlah: 9icetoo,

Maybe you should link your friend with 2sexy as per mentorship hehehe. He has been there, done that too. So he might help him in one way or the other.

Speaking from a lady's POV, the babe is not ready to experience the thin side of life, only the thick side. Unfortunately, like isn't so; it is a mix of thick and thin.

In his case, love is blind. Apart from you, has he told anyone else? I feel he should discuss with his father about it; let him hear what he has to say. Our fathers have seen much more than us, so he might open his eyes to what is hidden from him.

When a young man is confused about love matters, let him seek the counsel of elders. What a young man sees standing, an elder already sees while sitting.

Thanks ferhyntorlah. I will definitely encourage him to share his predicament with his dad.

2sexy: where have you been?

2sexy,

I've been around, didn't go anywhere. I saw your thread oh.

Singing African China's song:
*if you love somebody;
walk up to her and
tell her you love her;
Eh eh, it does no crime,
no crime at all*

Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe

9icetoo: Thanks ferhyntorlah. I will definitely encourage him to share his predicament with his dad.

It's welcome. I think it's high time your friend and his dad have that Father-Son Talk. He is about to begin a new phase in his life so I believe his dad would be of help in that area.

ferhyntorlah:

2sexy,

I've been around, didn't go anywhere. I saw your thread oh.

Singing African China's song:
*if you love somebody;
walk up to her and
tell her you love her;
Eh eh, it does no crime,
no crime at all*

Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe

hahahahaahha . I laf so tey, mess comot for my yansh! ehn?

Anyways, the babe dey form say she was just looking at me and not that there is anything special. you know how una dey form na. I have given some break but will keep in touch.

2sexy:

hahahahaahha . I laf so tey, mess comot for my yansh! ehn?

Anyways, the babe dey form say she was just looking at me and not that there is anything special. you know how una dey form na. I have given some break but will keep in touch.

Yes ke! Woman and their shakara! Good you had a good laugh and good that you released gas; it shows your system sef jasi, hehehe.

ferhyntorlah:

Yes ke! Woman and their shakara! Good you had a good laugh and good that you released gas; it shows your system sef jasi, hehehe.

Lol... you go kill me ooo. but seriously, if she continue with this attitude, me go bone ooo. Though despite saying she was just looking at me and that it wasnt anything, because she feels I am basing my action on that stares she gave me, she still agreed to see me when I am ready. Good signal, right?