A CAUCASIAN WOMAN:
First date: You get to kiss her goodnight.
Second date: You get to grope all over and make out.
Third date: You get to have sex but only in the missionary position.

IRISH WOMAN:
First Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
Second Date: You both get blind drunk and have sex.
20th Anniversary: You both get blind drunk and have sex.

ITALIAN WOMAN:
First Date: You take her to a play and an expensive restaurant.
Second Date: You meet her parents and her Mom makes spaghetti & meatballs.
Third Date: You have sex, she wants to marry you & insists on a 3 carat ring.
5th Anniversary: You already have 5 kids together & hate the thought of having sex.
6th Anniversary: You find yourself a girlfriend.

JEWISH WOMAN:
First Date: You get dynamite head.
Second Date: You get more great head.
Third Date: You tell her you'll marry her and never get head again.

POLISH WOMAN:
First Date: You go to pick her up, and she isn't home. She gave you the wrong address.
Second Date: You decide to meet at a restaurant. She gets lost getting to the restaurant and then again going home.
Third Date: She's pregnant. She's not sure if its hers.

CHINESE WOMAN:
First date: You get to buy her an expensive dinner but nothing happens.
Second date: You buy her an even more expensive dinner but nothing happens again.
Third date: You don't even get to the third date and you have already realized nothing is going to happen.

INDIAN WOMAN:
First date: Meet her parents.
Second date: Set the date of the wedding.
Third date: Wedding night.

BLACK WOMAN:
First Date: You get to buy her a real expensive dinner.
Second Date: You get to buy her and her 250 lbs girlfriend a real expensive dinner.
Third Date: You get to pay her rent.
Tenth Date: She's pregnant by someone other than you.

LATIN WOMAN:
First Date: You buy her an expensive dinner, get her drunk on Riunite, have sex in the back of her car.
Second Date: She is pregnant.
Third Date: Move in with her, her two illegal alien cousins, her sister's boyfriend and live happily ever after eating rice and beans in the Bronx.

YORUBA WOMAN:
First Date: Don't need to buy her expensive dinner, just tell her your address and you'll have made sex that night.
Second Date: She moves in and becomes your illegal wife. Sex becomes your breakfast, lunch and dinner
Third Date: She's Pregnant! She stays legal. Free sex all your life!

Igbo Woman:
First Date: Buy her an expensive dinner, send her diamond, and she'll only touch your privates! NO SEX!
Second Date: Buy her a car, give her a cheque of 1million naira and she'll kiss you. Still NO SEX!
Third Date: Don't be a fool! There's No third date. She's Gone!

Hausa Woman:
First Date: You go home to pick her up, and a table is already set for you. Don't Think about Sex!
Second Date: She comes to the restaurant with her aunt, introducing yu as the future hubby. You get a handshake! NO HUG! NO KISS, GOD FORBID IF YOU THINK ABOUT SEX.
Third Date: You are lying on a mat, with the girl's father tearing your a55 out! That's the wedding. After that comes plenty sex!
                     Tell me how u gon perform well with your swollen a55.

i love this

u gotta love it. . . . . . . . coz u know it's tru

Dating vs. Marriage


When you are dating, Farting is never an issue.
When you are married , You make sure there's nothing flammable near your husband at all times.

When you are dating, He takes you out to have a good time.
When you are married , He brings home a 6 pack, and says "What are you going to drink?"

When you are dating, He holds your hand in public.
When you are married , He flicks your ear in public.

When you are dating, A Single bed for 2 isn't THAT bad.
When you are married , A King size bed feels like an army cot.

When you are dating, You are turned on at the sight of him naked.
When you are married , You think to yourself "Was he ALWAYS this hairy?"

When you are dating, You enjoyed pre-intimacy.
When you are married , You tell him "If we have sex, will you leave me alone"

When you are dating, He hugs you, when he walks by you for no reason.
When you are married , He grabs your boob any chance he gets.

When you are dating, You picture the two of you together, growing old together.
When you are married , You wonder who will die first.

When you are dating, Just looking at him makes you feel all "mushy."
When you are married , When you look at him, you want to claw his eyes out.

When you are dating, He knows what the "hamper" is.
When you are married , The floor will suffice as a dirty clothes storage area.

When you are dating, He understands if you "Aren't in the mood."
When you are married , He says "It's your job."

When you are dating, He understands that you have "male" friends.
When you are married , He thinks they are all out to steal you away.

When you are dating, He likes to "discuss" things.
When you are married , He develops a "blank" stare.

When you are dating, He calls you by name.
When you are married , He calls you "Hey" and refers to you when speaking to others as "She."

sure say u go marry so?

hahaah good piece

clemcykul:

sure say u go marry so?

hahaah good piece

i still dey think am oh!

i fit come your village come adopt your king dem children.

@kronkykay U no need to worry, with d way girls plenty like pure water these days, i hear say dem don dey marry credit for some areas.
MARRY NOW AND PAY LATER
If i dey lie, ask Ituen.

i believe you my broda. , . . . . . . . .

1 girl don tell me say make i no worry to pay money come marry her. . . . . . . . .

say she go talk to her parents and e go be free for now. . . . . .till her death na im i go pay, . . . . . . .

i fear ooohhh. . . . . .i just take my ration run far away.

This free marriage thing is really get out of hand.
But Ituen is making maximum use of the opportunity. With the amount of wives he has both here in NLD and that im face me i face u apartment.

am not surprised!

. . . . .the guy is an _opportunist!

[_{s]no be talk am oh[/s]}

Hmmmmmm,

Na me una dey discuss like this. Come to think of it ben and kronky do reach age to marry oh

Man thanks for the offer, but unlike you, we no wan marry credit.

@ituen

you and who wan marry on credit . . . . . .

that kain bonanza, na only u dey enjoy am . . . . . . .pls take full benefits

marriage on credit dey sweet oooo
you fit dey pay small small

that's my man saucekid, talking from xperience.

Cool jokes

nice

Lmao. Nice one der dude.

marry 4 credit na the order of the day for dem iteun village

hi dear

where have you been migs ?

he's been in paris just came to say hi honnie to his beloved

Yeah baby
*hugs*
@ben
man long time u've been scarce as well bizy innit?

marriage on credit sweet

@kronk nice ones again.
keep them cuming !

thanks ify,

more coming soon. just keep yur fingers crossed . . . . . . . .don't break 'em sha oooo. . . . .

awwww trust me,i wont.even my drink(Irish cream) aint gonna drop or spil.
am well packaged
see you soon kronk,want to go get done now ciao

@topic,niceeeeeeeeeeeeee ones from a very Hot poster

ifyalways:

awwww trust me,i wont.even my drink(Irish cream) aint going to drop or spil.
am well packaged
see you soon kronk,want to go get done now ciao

@topic,niceeeeeeeeeeeeee ones from a very Hot poster

Gr8 minds think alike baby!

u sure are, for u to know that i am. . . .

hehe.you are walking alone there men.OYO 4 lyfe.
kronk nite nite been a swell time with you just that your bla bla bla instrument fits my ear perfectly.hon, why dont we change positions ?

Lol this is awesome

spoilt peoples

@ify
damn! U dont say
@kronky
so ur pencil sized gazunga is wat makes u feel so fly.

@ ify


damn! i cant believe u are still innocent, don't know the diff between the thing and a finger. . . . . . . alright, i'll teach you. . . . .

okay bend over. . . . touch your toes . . . . . and spread them legz wide. . . . . .

*keep the voice down, you'll alert my wife*


@miggs

ask clem wat it was like having it mouthful.