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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? (3305 Views)
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When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by jkpretty(f): 8:47am On Mar 27, 2008 |
When good guys hurt u, u find it hard to forgive cos the pain remains so intense and u might probably not forget. Or break up. But for a bad guy u can easily overlook the same offense. Does this fall under the category of the adage "Life isn't fair". Or a thing of choice? |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by efuah(f): 8:53am On Mar 27, 2008 |
The pain is deep bcus we think they are too harmless to hurt an ant. . . too good. . . next to angels, but they are not. Nobody is really good dear. We all have a percentage of evil in us, but as rational as one can be, u put your actions to check. This is what i was talking about sometime ago. . . we trust some "good guys" to the core. In relationships, be ready for both. . . negative n positive. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by opokonwa(m): 9:19am On Mar 27, 2008 |
jkpretty: What exactly do you mean by good guys? Who is a good guy in this context |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by jkpretty(f): 9:28am On Mar 27, 2008 |
opokonwa: I'm sure u know the meaning of "good" & the meaning of "bad". This shouldn't give u a headache. Borrow from efuah. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by pahtahkee: 9:37am On Mar 27, 2008 |
The keyword here is TRUST. It is the determinant to a good relationship or a heartache. You already think a good guy is trust reliable, but it is not always so. On the other hand, you already know a bad guy is bad no need to trust him and when he messes it up, you are free from heartache. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by almondjoy(f): 9:39am On Mar 27, 2008 |
jkpretty: Wrong! Speak for yourself. I will hurt but it will go away because I forgive easily. Having lived a good childhood and a good adulthood. . . I am a stranger to unhappiness because I just don't give people that kind of power over me. Where I cannot forgive you. . .I forget you very easily. Life is very fair and it is a thing of choice. If you want to live. . .you will live. If you want to die. . .then you will have lots of help and no one will give a damn! You can only give people the power to hurt you if you are weak and have no alternatives to make yourself happy. If you are beautiful. . .independent. . .sexy. . .lovable. . . and just outright human, you will always have options to make you happy. Halle Berry and Jennifer Lopez come to mind. Never give anyone the power to leave any kind of hurt in you when he or she leaves your life. Package that hurt and send it with them so they can get their own "just rewards" in the future too. If you let it stay with you. . . your happiness and success go with them. It is not about good guy or bad guy. . . .it is all about you! No one is indispensable I say! |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by danity: 9:40am On Mar 27, 2008 |
I agree with Efuah! The level of expectation differs according to the badness of the guy. You expect a good guy to be responsible and adhering to all your rules. On the other hand - you expect a bad guy to misbehave. That's why. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by almondjoy(f): 9:47am On Mar 27, 2008 |
opokonwa: My point exactly! It is all the the girl's mind jare! |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by jkpretty(f): 10:00am On Mar 27, 2008 |
@Aj This isn't about the person concerned. I think its a thing of expectations. Its not a matter of proving urself & or letting someone have power over u. The truth is when there's a break up someone must hurt. Now the hurt may vary. Two different guys commit the same offense and one can be easily pardoned & the other is unpardonable. This has nothing to do with ur person. I just notice this happens a lot. Some men can be forgiven over & over again while some won't. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by Joey82(m): 10:49am On Mar 27, 2008 |
@jk, hi In truth, there isnt any good guy ( as in 100% good), it all depends on situations at a particular point in time and your expectations from d relationship. Sometimes, guys u think cant hurt a fly can actually turn to bite hard and d ones that look bad can actually be good within. Most importantly, a guy treats a girl according to what he wants from her. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by bebe2007(m): 2:31pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
It hurts so much when someone you least expect hurts you. Speaking from experience, its one of the worst feelings i have had in ages. The ache just refuses to go away. When its a bad guy, you are ready and waiting for it to happen but this said "good guy" just takes you unawares. He really did stab my heart. Trying to forgive and forget the whole thing though havent got a choice. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by Busta(f): 2:46pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
@jk such is life and life ain't fair. one way or the other . . .we gotta learn to deal with things like this. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by zheroes(m): 2:50pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
whoever hurts you is a bad guy!!! good guys go all the wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy to the ALTAR, Unless it becomes unavoidably necessary. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by jkpretty(f): 3:12pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
zheroes:Yeah and the truth is that the good guy might still want to go to the altar with u. But he hurt remains unpardonable. And u'll rather break up. Or are u saying good guys don't hurt? |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by zheroes(m): 3:18pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
jkpretty: may be am not getting you clearly, hurt as in heartbreak or just getting you angry over trivial issues? |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by jkpretty(f): 3:24pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
Any kind of hurt that could bring heartbreak. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by Imani(f): 3:30pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
bebe2007: Sorry about your experience . I love with my head rather than heart. My heart is too precious to allow any man to break, hurt or stab . Maybe my temperament has something to do with it |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by nana(f): 3:32pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
I agree with Efuah |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by Nobody: 3:33pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
because you think that they are so nice they can't possibly hurt you in any way yeah right when it comes to the bad guys, it's almost expected of them to do something to hurt you possibly therefore it doesnt hurt as much? |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by Nobody: 3:45pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
I avoid anything that will bring hurt. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by jkpretty(f): 4:09pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
stillwater: U can't avoid hurt all ur life, atimes the more protective u are of urself, the more vulnerable u become. Much more, hurt doesn't knock on the door, it comes when u are unguarded. That's why hurts. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by yemivictor: 4:34pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
I agree with almondjoy completely! We should learn to forgive because it is a virtue in itself!! And i dare say that i'm a living witness & beneficiary of almondjoy's large heart!!! Her graciousness @ forgiving easily also!! What a wonderful lady she is! And i hear she's not bad looking & that she's got cute nails too!!! I happen to have a fetish for cute nails! . . . . . . . . A big kiss to you AJ! Mmmwwaaaaaaaaaaahh!!! |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by zheroes(m): 4:47pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
yemivictor: I hope you took permission from Mr. Almond. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by yemivictor: 5:23pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
zheroes: No worry! Me & Mr. Almond get accord! |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by ifyalways(f): 5:33pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
@topic,am more along AJ's lines . . .its all abt ME not HIM |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by ladybird: 5:56pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
no good guy would hurt.so the issue of good guys hurting u is out of it. |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by PERVERT9: 6:07pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
the reason why its so deep is that good guys have long "thing" the longer the deeper |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by tommyex(m): 6:24pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
EFUAH did much justice to this topic sweety,how ur family? Hope he is good to you |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by tommyex(m): 6:27pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
Pervert can u be serious?jus 4 this thread |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by PERVERT9: 6:34pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
tommyex:how serious would you like me to be? abeg o |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by almondjoy(f): 7:15pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
yemivictor: Mmmmwwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaam to you too! Easy ooooooooooh! No deprive me of ma ration this nignt! Na your bed I go come sleep! On a serious note, But hey. . . girls are just too sensitive and expect too much. The sad part is that they would rationalize a good guy's bad behaviour and demonize a[b] bad guy's behaviour![/b] But guess what. . . both guys did the same thing! What is that? yemivictor: Exactly! ifyalways: Simple! PERVERT9: hahahahahahahahaha! tommyex: hahahahahahahahahahaha! |
Re: When Good Guys Hurt U, The Pain Is So Deep. Why? by almondjoy(f): 7:21pm On Mar 27, 2008 |
It's to a certain point in life. . . you know what to expect from "humans" as a whole. No surprises. Like I said, you can never trust anyone with your most prized possession. . . your heart. Good guy or bad guy. . . .they both have the potentials to hurt. You loved the "bad" guy didn't you? Example. . . if a good guy rapes you, you will feel more hurt than if a bad guy rapes you? Focus: rape is rape. author=Imani link=topic=122879.msg2097714#msg2097714 date=1206628227] Simple! I wish women would take more control over their emotions! |
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