pak:


Am not just going to dump her, done that like 3 times and she just strolled back in using the 'power'.

but this time, my game plan is to simply 'hit' one of her closest and best friend who has serious 'hots' for me (and do it in a way that she'll know about it)
I guess that will settle the 'ish' once and for all, it actually makes me feel more powerful already

Don't do it bro...if you feel she is not reciprocating ur love..just take a walk..sleepin wit her friend is not d best..it will reduce your reputation self..show her you are d matured one here by taking a walk and heal ur heart..tk a decision not to go back to here nd stick to it..there are countless gorgeous gals out there..so why mess up ur reputation cos of this one gal??I don't believe in burning bridges..

blidz2:
yu r right its happenin 2 me...dere is dis gal i so much luv buh i fink im takin it 2 fast,i always feel insecure weneva im wiv her

Must you quote it? Ah ah...no wonder the girl left you.

deshclones:

Don't do it bro...if you feel she is not reciprocating ur love..just take a walk..sleepin wit her friend is not d best..it will reduce your reputation self..show her you are d matured one here by taking a walk and heal ur heart..tk a decision not to go back to here nd stick to it..there are countless gorgeous gals out there..so why mess up ur reputation cos of this one gal??I don't believe in burning bridges..

Word! This is the best advice!!
Seconded!!!

deshclones:

Don't do it bro...if you feel she is not reciprocating ur love..just take a walk..sleepin wit her friend is not d best..it will reduce your reputation self..show her you are d matured one here by taking a walk and heal ur heart..tk a decision not to go back to here nd stick to it..there are countless gorgeous gals out there..so why mess up ur reputation cos of this one gal??I don't believe in burning bridges..

Deshclones, thanx for the advice but seems you did not read my previous posts. I actually hesitated in opening up about my 'plans' cos as you rightly pointed out - its despicable but I feel I have no choice in this matter than to do something drastic. You talk about walking away ? Yes I have done that - 3 times within the space of one year but she knows that once she makes a move back, deed is done, she does it so effortlessly that am a bit sick and tired.
There are countless gorgeous girls ? Yes ! her friend is one of them.

but not to worry, I (we) are still giving it one more shot, plan B only comes into play when it fails.
Truth is bro, If I tell you wetin this girl don use my eye see ehn, na you go dey give me all the 'morale' to do wetin I wan do !

Becacia_Barbie:
I pirry you!

Becacia, why u dey pity me, what other advice in this world can you giv in this situation ? Am not a bad guy but its 'condition' that's forcing me to take this step. Never done such b4

pak:

Becacia, why u dey pity me, what other advice in this world can you giv in this situation ? Am not a bad guy but its 'condition' that's forcing me to take this step. Never done such b4

condition? Where is the condition here? I dont see any except the one you creating for yourself.
I know it could be really difficult for u to walk away without looking back, but thats the only option u got dear, except u r weak.
Ok, You think sleepin with her frd will help?
No dear, it wont and never'll it...
For me u moving from fry pan to fire...u just gonna hurt urself more and more, so dont even go there at all. Trust me, karma ll'never b interested in what ever led you to that act, karma will defo come back for you and it will hurt more! So walk away, and move forward! Life its really too short to go through all dz.

pak:


Deshclones, thanx for the advice but seems you did not read my previous posts. I actually hesitated in opening up about my 'plans' cos as you rightly pointed out - its despicable but I feel I have no choice in this matter than to do something drastic. You talk about walking away ? Yes I have done that - 3 times within the space of one year but she knows that once she makes a move back, deed is done, she does it so effortlessly that am a bit sick and tired.
There are countless gorgeous girls ? Yes ! her friend is one of them.

but not to worry, I (we) are still giving it one more shot, plan B only comes into play when it fails.
Truth is bro, If I tell you wetin this girl don use my eye see ehn, na you go dey give me all the 'morale' to do wetin I wan do !

Bro,nothing is new...no matter what you feel this gal has put you thru..there are countless guys that have gone thru worse things in the hands of gals...yours is not different...you should take that walk with your confidence and decency intact..now that you still have ur head high...what if she breaks off the relationship first?..bro this chic is obviously not into you..there is a huge difference btwn playing hard to get and not sending someone atall..your woman no send you..dats d plain truth..be decisive man..a man without principles is a dead man...she obviously knows you wiLl not keep to ur words of ending the relationship hence her non chalant attitude..she holds ur control key bro..nd gals hate men that go back on their words...take a walk now man..end it before she ends its and leaves you in emotional wreck..

If you genuinely want to go out wit her friend,if you truly love her friend and want to date her..then go for the friend..if its for revenge purposes..then die that thot..its a small world bro..leave d poor gal alone..its no fault of hers that her friend played you.

I didn't even have to finish reading it all, I know its true cos I'm experiencing d same thing right now. What My boyfriend has 4 me has passed love. He's actually obsessed with me. I've told him about it and how he should slow it down. He said he knows he's obsessed bt can't help it; even after 3yrs! Hahahaha.

I love him too ofcourse but him own don pass 'be careful' stage.

Egba girl:
Hey bro, what's going on?! Uh okay, so I am not a relationship expert or anything like that but from what you said, I doubt that was love and if it was, then it was under the wrong circumstances. You talk about emotional blackmail, you not being mentally ready and not even wanting the relationship. If all these factors were non-existent, would you still have done the same? If you really loved her, would you have felt blackmailed? Did you feel like you were under pressure to be in a relationship with her? and you had to prove a point? I don't think you loved her too much and you prolly weren't obsessed with here. I honestly can't identify/name what sort of emotional/psychological trigger that made you do all that but I would say that it all stems from the conditions/factors you mentioned. (Note: you said you "had" to ask her out,you did all that stuff 'cause she was a nice girl etc. I did not see any mention of I liked/loved her?)

I honestly think that if you love someone, you would know that he or she is an individual that needs personal space sometimes, no over protection, none of all the stuff the OP mentioned. And for me, there is nothing like loving too much. When it gets to the stage that the OP is talking about, then it has gone beyond love to something else. .

Btw, that one experience should not change your whole perspective on relationships. I guess it might be a personal fear of "losing yourself", which does not have to be the case. Thing is, I think that relationships change people (and it should be a positive change anyway) but you should not be afraid to change. I don't have the guide book to relationships (as far as I am concerned, it doesn't exist) but being aware of the fact that being in a relationship will change you, will make you mentally prepared to handle that change. If you begin to see yourself doing irrational things out of fear/insecurity and what not, then yea... time to reconsider.

BUT don't be afraid to love. (I guess it also involves loving the right person - one that won't take advantage of your love and who loves you back).


*To be real with you, I am no expert on this. Just using my head and experience.*

Whoa!!! Sorry, I just saw your reply now... I'm good, my intelligent nubian sister...

Basically, I think her ride-or-die virtue and emotional blackmail kind of triggered the feelings I had for her... She also did some stuffs for me and went through certain things because of me that made me feel she was the chosen one...

Anyway, I definitely won't let that change my views... I'm just trying to grow right now and imbibe what's on your signature(In youth we learn; in age we understand)....

Thanks sis..

blidz2:
yu r right its happenin 2 me...dere is dis gal i so much luv buh i fink im takin it 2 fast,i always feel insecure weneva im wiv her

u quoted a full thread just to make a Jewish Comment.....u no get OT.

shymexx:

Whoa!!! Sorry, I just saw your reply now... I'm good, my intelligent nubian sister...

Basically, I think her ride-or-die virtue and emotional blackmail kind of triggered the feelings I had for her... She also did some stuffs for me and went through certain things because of me that made me feel she was the chosen one...

Anyway, I definitely won't let that change my views... I'm just trying to grow right now and imbibe what's on your signature(In youth we learn; in age we understand)....

Thanks sis..

LOL. Me and you both. lol but nah I feel you! We learn and grow from our past experiences. I'm with you on the growing mos def! We got this!

Egba girl:

LOL. Me and you both. lol but nah I feel you! We learn and grow from our past experiences. I'm with you on the growing mos def! We got this!

Lmao..

I dig your maturity, knowledge, intelligence, and the way you carry yourself...

Damn!! You're oya and madam Tinubu in one body....

Do ya thing, sis...

ur signs nd wonders r true, u r on track. Thump up

this post just summarised me in my last relationship. thank God i am older and wiser now

MayorSchwags:

i wud neva av tot sum1 els feels d exact same way im feeling. Ts lyk uv bn spying on me. Typical! Walahi,d shit hurts,i telya. Sum tyms i tnk its karma, Cos i knw a few ladiz iv trtd almst dsame way al cosof ds same babe

My dear, I think we're on d same boat.. But i wonder why its rare to see pple who have d same measure of love to share be in a relationship.... Its like dis is a form of punishment. Its really crazy

christygenius:



My dear, I think we're on d same boat.. But i wonder why its rare to see pple who have d same measure of love to share be in a relationship.... Its like dis is a form of punishment. Its really crazy

. i tnk ds wud only serve2 make 1 a bera person, nw dat its obvious feelns can MOST LIKELY not be equal

There is only one word to interprete this so called love- INFACTUATION. Wat u may say as "loving someone more than he/she does",is not love. Its infactuation.[color=#770077][/color]