quest003: i cry for you, your lyf has nep2rad

Lolaabokoku: u should knw the answer to ur question

biolabee: Dude your question no make sense

The fact that it may happen does not mean it is permissible which is the operative word here

biolabee: Dude calm down and drink some kool aid

I answered your q

No parent will normally permit such; that meanin it does not happen either under their roof or elsewhere



Go and carry your frustration elsewwhere

nep2ra:

Thanks for your contribution.

May you find solutions to all your challenges.

nep2ra:

Thanks for your contribution.

May you find solutions to all your challenges.

Xavier1976: Really, cos it was asked in UK TV doesn't make it an "ok" question. Ask yourself, if the teenager is your daughter what would be your response? So that's your answer!

Xavier1976: Really, cos it was asked in UK TV doesn't make it an "ok" question. Ask yourself, if the teenager is your daughter what would be your response? So that's your answer!

candygosh: The topic requires thinking
In my opinion, granting ur kids the freedom to explore their sexual fantasies makes one a loose parent with Loose kids. Nevertheless, it can Help in strengthening the bond between them as it gives the kids the freedom to express emotions n wants.

On the other hand, if one fails to let them do their Thing under ones roof, then doing it outside is not good too.
It won't give room for The prefect bonding.
Hence, teen shys away from such discussion.

It all boils down to training up ur child the way He should go and when he is old as the Bible Says he won't depart from it.

Murder_X: I'ld encourage them to have a boy/girlfriend, someone of good character and from a known good home. What goes on in their rooms with their lovers is their business.

biolabee: And you accused others of being closed minded

What is your agenda with this topic
To bash the poor people in naija right or wat exactly is meant by liberalness etc bla bla bla

You know the right thing or more politically correct the ethical thing and even some viewers in the show you watched said as much
The fact that modern realities have laid to bear new strategies to protect kids from s.exual infections still does not mean a parent will dance azonto when his daughter or son is being poked or poking someone else

Ish




Liberalism indeed

slimyem: Nigerian parents don't even endorse their teenage children having girlfriends or boyfriends not to talk of having sex under their roof.
What can faa?
As a teenager in nigeria,everything sexually you do has to be literally unknown to your parents. Nigerian parents are not as liberal as parents in the west.We are a people still conformed to a standard of right behaviour operative on ethical judgement.

nep2ra:

Thanks for your contribution.

I grew up in Nigeria and know what you are on about. None of us dared bring a girlfriend home in our teenage years. You would be asking for BIG trouble if you ever did. However, that didn't stop us from attempting or doing naughty things.
Let's face it. It well known teenagers are raging wild with active hormones. This stage of their lives is quite delicate and they most often succumb to peer pressure. If they don't "do it" under your roof, trust me, the more daring ones will "do it" elsewhere.

The bolded caught my attention and got me asking questions. Are Nigerians truly a people "conformed to right behavior operative on ethical judgement?" What is "right behavior?" Why does it not reflect on all facets of of the Nigerian society? or does this "right behavior" apply only to sexual conduct?

biolabee:

It does not reflect cos we are a nation of hypocrites

yellowpawpaw: @op,I went tru all ur post here,why r u bent on bashing nigeria? This is good topic for discussion.go straight to topic and stop generalizn it.I'm happy to know u r a nigerian who happend to find himself in another man's country made what it is by their citizens! If u want to condenm nigeria,why not create a thread for it than this?I tire for some people. To ur topic,in as much as we r all civilised and want the best for our kids,there r things better left un imagined.I will lv to know who hangs out with my kids but can't imagine my child and her date copulating under my roof! I should also provide d condom! I believe that at that age,I should hv tot my gal enof sex education that will enable her make a good choice in life.even if its done in my house(of which it happens like dat most times)let me not be aware of it.

slimyem: ^You know how they say what you don't know won't harm you?
I think that the issue with our parents.All is well as long as they don't know its happening or they just feel safer assuming its not happening.The home or their roof is one territory where the can exert more control so it figures why it is a NO for sex by teens under it.

As per the right behaviour and conformity thing,I think we are but not in all senses so lemme just say i was talking "in this sense" not generally.Sex and dressing are still a conservative topic.
On other facets of the society,we are plagued by too many issues and the rot is too deep ethical judgement most times does not stand a chance.

Are you also saying our response and
attitude to sex and dress mode is to a
large extent culture specific and NOT
based on "right behavior" ?

slimyem: ^well,I'm not proferring a solution to this issue as it seems.That'd be another angle entirely.I'm just trying to see things from our parents' point of view though warped it seems.Isn't our culture and right behaviour intertwined in this case?

nep2ra:

I'm not in a position to judge whether our parents thinking are warped or not. I will have kids of mine some day and they will also pass through teenage years. My partner and I have divergent opinions on this issue. I have made my position clear that I will not encourage my teenage kids to have sex with their boyfriends/girlfriends under my roof. Although she understands my argument, she see nothing wrong with it as she was brought up under a different culture.

Culture is a society's adopted way of life at a particular point in time. I say this because, like most things, culture is susceptible to the flowing river of change. Right behavior on the other hand, is too vague and broad to define. Doing so might lead us to a long winding argument bordering on philosophy and religion. I'm afraid I'm in no mood to tread that path.