I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp - Family - Nairaland
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| I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by chioma134: 6:47pm On May 20, 2013 |
You may say I'm being paranoid,but at least hear me out. I think I need spiritually sound christians to advise me correctly. I got a new househelp recently cos I needed help after I delivered about 6 weeks ago. The problem is that I'm not very comfortable with her. The night b4 she came,I dreamt of an evil bird that flew into our home. 2 days later,I dreamt of a predatory dog that came into our house at night.I don't usually dream such dreams. Yesterday,a cat we don't know where it came from was heard crying in the engine of our car just bought 3 days ago. The cat was found and ran out. As soon as I set my eyes on her as she stepped out of d car when my husband brought her for the first time,I had an uneasy feeling. Maybe because of my dream the previous night,I don't know. I had actually prayed dt morning for God to stop her from coming if she was not d right person,but here she was already in my house. On interacting with her,I learnt she is a 30yr old lady,married but separated from her husband. Had 6 children,with only 2 surviving. Her parents told her to leave her husband becos they believed that her husband's 2nd wife was the cause of her children's deaths. Her husband took another wife because her children were dying. She got married 12yrs ago. Due to circumstances,she decided to do d job of a househelp to support herself. She left her children in d care of her parents. Because she is older,I expected her to be responsible,so I gave her a free hand in my house. But she is misusing it. When I'm bathing my baby or cooking,instead of coming to help,she sits in d parlour watching tv. When visitors come,instead of her to leave the parlour,she sits tight. Does not tell me thank you after eating. Does not do anything unless she is told. She has been with me for 2 weeks,but has not changed baby's diapers once,talkless of bathing her. She just called me now as I was typing this to come and change baby's pampers. And I've shown her countless times how to do it. And I don't like the way she walks into my room uninvited. You would have thought that a married woman would know better. Funny enough,my husband's relative living with us is more hardworking than she is. The girl even does some of the chores I send the new help out of respect for her. I only needed another person cos she is still in secondary school,and I needed someone to help me since I'm also studying for my forthcoming exams in my masters program. Also I need someone to take care of my baby when I resume from maternity leave. Right now,I can categorically say she is a liability to me,unless she improves. The bottom-line is I'm not just comfortable with her. What do I do? Mature advice only. 1 Like 2 Shares |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Sanboy25: 7:01pm On May 20, 2013 |
Easy, fire her, it's your money, your house and your family. Don't give yourself a headache. 31 Likes |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by missojugo(f): 7:06pm On May 20, 2013 |
My Sister pls pls and pls you are not paranoid. You don't need Holy Spirit to slap you first before you send her packing! Please give her a full months pay and send her back to her parents tomorrow!!! Take your baby to a good Creche when you resume work I beg you. A word is enough for the wise. How can u ask someone whose own kids died mysteriously to help you take care of your child  ?? Its good to help others so give her a full months salary and pray for her. That's all12 Likes |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by uyogabie(f): 7:08pm On May 20, 2013 |
Please,tell her to leave politely.ASAP. 1 Like |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by jeffizy(m): 7:13pm On May 20, 2013 |
First and second comments are all you need. But why did you hire a woman who is already set in her character? 2 Likes |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by greatgod2012(f): 7:17pm On May 20, 2013 |
missojugo: My Sister pls pls and pls you are not paranoid. You don't need Holy Spirit to slap you first before you send her packing! Please give her a full months pay and send her back to her parents tomorrow!!! Take your baby to a good Creche when you resume work I beg you. A word is enough for the wise. How can ask someone whose own kids died mysteriously to help you take care of your child this poster have said it all........pls, adhere, children are precious than being gambled with. May God help you. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by bigiyaro(m): 7:29pm On May 20, 2013 |
Pls ask yourself what kind of home you really want to live in. As for me, my home is the best and last place to stay, eat, have fun, relax n etc. To me when am stressed, pulled n pushed in my work place or anywhere else, I ran home to get my daily dose of love, care and affection from my family. Am saying all this to say that, if you are not comfortable in your own home, then am really sorry for you. weather you are paranoid or not, remove that thing that makes you uncomfortable in your home. It's your own home for God's sake, of you can't sleep well in your home, then were else. 2 Likes |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by SisiKill1: 8:51pm On May 20, 2013 |
I'm sorry but all dream about cat this and dog that is nothing but nonsense...the mere fact that she is not doing what she was hired to do it reason enough to kick her out. Period!!! Gosh! I don't understand why people like drama...She slept and had a dream about a cat and dog and a bird and this and that when what needs to be done could have been done without the epistle.  missojugo: My Sister pls pls and pls you are not paranoid. You don't need Holy Spirit to slap you first before you send her packing! Please give her a full months pay and send her back to her parents tomorrow!!! Take your baby to a good Creche when you resume work I beg you. A word is enough for the wise. How can ask someone whose own kids died mysteriously to help you take care of your child 1 Like |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by jumsnarol: 8:52pm On May 20, 2013 |
Pls let her go. There is really no issue here, had a girl like dat wen I gave birth to my second baby. Sent her back after 2 weeks cos I don't like to take unnecessary chances wit my family. Pls just let her go u will find another and if not there is always a way out. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by chioma134: 9:28pm On May 20, 2013 |
missojugo: My Sister pls pls and pls you are not paranoid. You don't need Holy Spirit to slap you first before you send her packing! Please give her a full months pay and send her back to her parents tomorrow!!! Take your baby to a good Creche when you resume work I beg you. A word is enough for the wise. How can ask someone whose own kids died mysteriously to help you take care of your childI didn't know her history until she came. All my negotiations prior to that were with her aunty. I think I'll take all your advice and send her away. I don't want to be sorry. @Sisikill,I was prepared to give her a fair chance with all her faults,hoping she'll get better,but the uneasy feeling makes me want to send her packing immediately. @All,thanks for your contributions. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by coogar: 9:36pm On May 20, 2013 |
Sisi_Kill: I'm sorry but all dream about cat this and dog that is nothing but nonsense...the mere fact that she is not doing what she was hired to do it reason enough to kick her out. Period!!! sisi, now you know..... that's how to distinguish between a male poster and a female poster. you are a quick learner.....keep it up! |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Airpure(f): 9:39pm On May 20, 2013 |
my dear i ve heard stories like this over n over. this kind of woman will do anything good for u n ur family. she is 30 yrs old ,how old r u? think of it she will spend her time in ur house being jealous of u n hoping to have what u have. when people talk of elderly nanny is women over 50 n even those just come to run ur home. better u get a lil girl that concentrates on the housework will u concentrate on the baby for now. ur first priority should be ur child. do u think such a woman will take good care of it when ur back is turned. pls do d needful. 3 Likes |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Nobody: 9:50pm On May 20, 2013 |
i'm a bit confused - she has stayed with you for 2 weeks and is not helping with the baby?  so why is she is your house?look if i hired someone to help me yet they are giving me headache they would have received their P45 by now. Poster please send this woman home before she sets he sights on other things in your home. congrats on your baby by the way! |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Nobody: 9:52pm On May 20, 2013 |
Airpure: my dear i ve heard stories like this over n over. this kind of woman will do anything good for u n ur family. she is 30 yrs old ,how old r u? think of it she will spend her time in ur house being jealous of u n hoping to have what u have. when people talk of elderly nanny is women over 50 n even those just come to run ur home. better u get a [b]lil girl [/b]that concentrates on the housework will u concentrate on the baby for now. how little? i hope you are not advocating child labour? 1 Like |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by markus007(m): 10:01pm On May 20, 2013 |
@OP, I seem to have a bit of experience in interpreting dreams. Dreams are one of the ways God uses in communicating to His Beloved. Check the stories of Joseph, Job, Daniel to mention but a few. Those dreams you had were not jokes (early warning signals), once u see a bird in your dream, it signifies witchcraft and dog symbolises a spirit of immorality. Am not saying this to scare u but to let you act as fast as you can to prayerfully ( with actions though) release that woman to go on her way. People who haven't experience LIFE will say you are paranoid. I pray they don't. 13 Likes |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by chioma134: 10:20pm On May 20, 2013 |
markus007: @OP, I seem to have a bit of experience in interpreting dreams. Dreams are one of the ways God uses in communicating to His Beloved. Check the stories of Joseph, Job, Daniel to mention but a few. Those dreams you had were not jokes (early warning signals), once u see a bird in your dream, it signifies witchcraft and dog symbolises a spirit of immorality. Am not saying this to scare u but to let you act as fast as you can to prayerfully ( with actions though) release that woman to go on her way. People who haven't experience LIFE will say you are paranoid. I pray they don't.Really? I think I should thread carefully here.Thanks for the interpretation.I'll be more prayerful from now on. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by chioma134: 10:30pm On May 20, 2013 |
cotton101: i'm a bit confused - she has stayed with you for 2 weeks and is not helping with the baby?Thanks,dear. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by SisiKill1: 10:42pm On May 20, 2013 |
coogar:Lol....Touche!  markus007: @OP, I seem to have a bit of experience in interpreting dreams. Dreams are one of the ways God uses in communicating to His Beloved. Check the stories of Joseph, Job, Daniel to mention but a few. Those dreams you had were not jokes (early warning signals), once u see a bird in your dream, it signifies witchcraft and dog symbolises a spirit of immorality. Am not saying this to scare u but to let you act as fast as you can to prayerfully ( with actions though) release that woman to go on her way. People who haven't experience LIFE will say you are paranoid. I pray they don't.  |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Nobody: 10:54pm On May 20, 2013 |
markus007: @OP, I seem to have a bit of experience in interpreting dreams. Dreams are one of the ways God uses in communicating to His Beloved. Check the stories of Joseph, Job, Daniel to mention but a few. Those dreams you had were not jokes (early warning signals), once u see a bird in your dream, it signifies witchcraft and dog symbolises a spirit of immorality. Am not saying this to scare u but to let you act as fast as you can to prayerfully ( with actions though) release that woman to go on her way. People who haven't experience LIFE will say you are paranoid. I pray they don't.lol And somebody was saying something about how posts like this differentiate a male and female poster. Is it not a male that typed the nonsense above? |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Nobody: 10:56pm On May 20, 2013 |
 what a day. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Nobody: 10:59pm On May 20, 2013 |
@topic, OP it seems you are scared of talking to the woman about her misbehaviour. Why? Is it the age difference? Anyway I think the best thing to do is to fire her. She knows her actions are wrong, no doubt about that, and she is only capitalizing on your quietness to continue freeloading in your house. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by ryom(m): 11:45pm On May 20, 2013 |
@op, we went through our own stint with househelps when our kids were growing up. We had them all - the good, the bad, the very bad and the ugly. I think we went through about 10 of them in all! That taught me to kind of be able to 'diagnose' the type of person plus I also thank God for spiritual insight. From what you've said, that lady is not the most suitable for you. Be nice but firm- she needs to leave ASAP! We wouldn't want you coming back here crying! All the best. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by baby124: 3:46am On May 21, 2013 |
Na wa o! |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Kelvindwaplord(m): 6:23am On May 21, 2013 |
Lol , there are 2 options here.. Its either she is your husband's secret lover , or she is an house help that wants to snatch your husband....easy solution , FIRE HER!? Via http://www.badootech.com 2 Likes |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Nobody: 7:19am On May 21, 2013 |
missojugo: My Sister pls pls and pls you are not paranoid. You don't need Holy Spirit to slap you first before you send her packing! Please give her a full months pay and send her back to her parents tomorrow!!! Take your baby to a good Creche when you resume work I beg you. A word is enough for the wise. How can ask someone whose own kids died mysteriously to help you take care of your child@Op do what you have been told. Sack, Fire, Pursue, Eject, Remove, Chase her away. Dont look @ what ur hubby will say. Act fast, don't waste anoda sec. 1 Like |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Nobody: 7:20am On May 21, 2013 |
First dnt ignore those dreams please! My pple perish because dey lack knowledge! Those dreams r bad signs! They might or not have anything 2ur hsehelp but be very careful! Pray against witchcraft & immorality dat want 2destroy ur home be it from her or anybody! Asper ur hsehelp, it maybe dat she is older dan you so u dnt knw hw to talk 2her! She is gradually controlling u in ur own house! Since her govt is trying 2b higher dan ur send her packing immediately! Where did dey bring her frm?! Send her back right away! Dnt let her knw she's leaving! Discuss wit ur husband 2nite dat she must leave d house 2mrw! First thing 2mrw mor, tell her to pack her things, pay her off & ask her 2leave ur house! Be firm about ds! Tell her u aint angry but u dnt need househelp again! Do u have maigad? Tell him 2see her out of d gate! Dnt wait till dat lady beat u or scatter ur home! These househelps know how 2manipulate pple! She will set ur husband against u now! In short forget story! Send her packing first thing 2mrw 7 Likes |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Nobody: 7:45am On May 21, 2013 |
She is a witch. Send her packing before she damages your home. To hell with all these househelps. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Nobody: 8:11am On May 21, 2013 |
Uncanny Genius: She is a witch. Send her packing before she damages your home. To hell with all these househelps.just like your name, u are very quick to conclude. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by trekkie: 8:11am On May 21, 2013 |
let her go now. give her her full month's pay. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by SpicyMimi(f): 8:12am On May 21, 2013 |
markus007: @OP, I seem to have a bit of experience in interpreting dreams. Dreams are one of the ways God uses in communicating to His Beloved. Check the stories of Joseph, Job, Daniel to mention but a few. Those dreams you had were not jokes (early warning signals), once u see a bird in your dream, it signifies witchcraft and dog symbolises a spirit of immorality. Am not saying this to scare u but to let you act as fast as you can to prayerfully ( with actions though) release that woman to go on her way. People who haven't experience LIFE will say you are paranoid. I pray they don't. |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Nobody: 8:35am On May 21, 2013 |
Uncanny Genius: She is a witch. Send her packing before she damages your home. To hell with all these househelps.witch catcher! |
| Re: I'm Not Comfortable With My Househelp by Nobody: 8:48am On May 21, 2013 |
I don laugh tire here! Some of d answers r just so funny. Fire,eject,pursue,witch catcher, sack etc! 1 Like |
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