@op,pls be honest in answering these questions
Whenever this lady visits you,do u at least try to give her transport fares back home?
Have u bought her any gifts or do u buy her things no matter how small?

Jenams: who be dis edioot? And to tink u r a guy is anoda issue entirely. Can u imagine d advice u r givin to a fellow man? Did u say give her money? Is he married to her yet? Is she his responsibilty? Is d lady in question an orphan? If u giv birth to a female child, dnt take care of her and see if she will nt become an ashee like d Op's gf. @all, the opportunity to make money is open to everyone both male and female. Dis day, wat most ladies dnt knw is dat, as they set out to hunt for rich, industrious n well to do guys who can provide for them, some smart dudes (like us) hav taken it upon ourselves to hunt for productive n industrious ladies as well. Any lady dat tries such wit me is on her way out! If I go giv u money while datin u, na my sole decision NOT YOURS! Abi I go dey pay u salary for datin u? #nonsense

bro , get a hold of yourself. the OP wrote in his initial post that the lady was his SPOUSE, so i assumed (wrongly) that they were MARRIED. the OP corrected me and i subsequently corrected my post......read above.
now, i am sorry to say that simply because that girl ask her future husband for money DOES NOT make her an ashi. she wants to have in place a system that will help her lazy self, but that has nothing to do with ashewoism, and all to do with laziness. a quick discussion with her can solve the issue.

texaco1:
Ok,I am sorry then I think u are right,but why doesn't the guy give some money to the lady ?I don't think the guy gives at all and what the lady is trying to do is to train the op to be a responsible man and to make him realise that once she gets to him she will become his responsibility

bro, it is not easy to give when you have been taken for a ride in the past. the OP is simply careful (maybe TOO careful) and thats why the lady is trying to make him relax like that. yes, he certainly have to give her some gifts whenever she "deserves" it, and at least go half way if she uses her own cash to visit him.

MRbrownJAY:

bro, it is not easy to give when you have been taken for a ride in the past. the OP is simply careful (maybe TOO careful) and thats why the lady is trying to make him relax like that. yes, he certainly have to give her some gifts whenever she "deserves" it, and at least go half way if she uses her own cash to visit him.

The issue of been taking for granted is an excuse the op is using ,no matter how hurt one can be not to the extent of not wanting to give at all.giving in excess may postponed but whenever she visits I believe any responsible man should at least give the lady her transport fare and once in a while recharge card is not bad ,even if it is 500 recharge a month as a surprise dash ,or what do u think?

^ yes, you are right but it should be voluntary and not a sense of duty/obligation. if OP has a car he can simply go get her and drive her back every time they meet...... but as for any other gift, as i wrote earlier, she needs to deserve it.

MRbrownJAY: ^ yes, you are right but it should be voluntary and not a sense of duty/obligation. if OP has a car he can simply go get her and drive her back every time they meet...... but as for any other gift, as i wrote earlier, she needs to deserve it.

You are been economical with the truth,if she uses her own money to visit regardless of the fact that the op will drive her back AT LEAST he should give her full return ticket money,why half?if he does this believe me the lady will not demand extra she knows that if he has he will give ,the op seems to be a miser that doesn't want to give ,I won't like to use an ashewo example because of ur backlash but if. Op bangs an ashi won't he give the ashi at least transport fares?what ppl have to understand is what the op does now is what he will do when he finally marries the lady and that is what this lady want to correct before they get married

texaco1:
You are been economical with the truth,if she uses her own money to visit regardless of the fact that the op will drive her back AT LEAST he should give her full return ticket money,why half?if he does this believe me the lady will not demand extra she knows that if he has he will give ,the op seems to be a miser that doesn't want to give ,I won't like to use an ashewo example because of ur backlash but if. Op bangs an ashi won't he give the ashi at least transport fares?what ppl have to understand is what the op does now is what he will do when he finally marries the lady and that is what this lady want to correct before they get married

imho, it is good to help a partner but NOT TOO MUCH TOO EARLY, and certainly NOT all the time. going Dutch can only be beneficial for their union, so that she understands from the beginning that her partner is not the type to dash money for no damn reason.

there is nothing wrong with a man who does "not want to give" for no damn reason, let that be his views and let her respect that. she comes to his place so he can either go get her, or pay half her fare. is she paying HIM when he comes to see her? why should he solely pay for an activity that they will BOTH enjoy?! you make it sound like she is doing HIM a favor by coming to see him? haba!

bro, as for the ashi example, this is not even comparable. ashi is paid for a service, when that service is done, she is out and not his problem. his gf on the other hand can call him for "free" advices, can ask him for help (with her car for example), can help her with her studies and even borrow her biz startup money....all for "free". and lets not forget the most IMPORTANT point here, i doubt they fukc every single time she comes to visit. so pls bro, let that ashi comparison go.

@ texaaco1: i do my to my best of knowledge.