I don't know on which side of the divide i stand, disciplined or cold hearted. I have this young, beautiful and attractive lady, a graduate, homely and with good moral upbringing, just the kind of girl i would like to have, but i don't seem to share her feelings. We are very good friends and i mean best of friends but i don't want to take it any further than that.
Once she collected my resume to help me in search of a job, and she has never asked me for a dime, instead she's been very supportive and believes so much in me. She is a christian but not yet bornagain, and I'm born-again, but worst still is that i love her, but not enough to start up a romance with her. Am i cruel or disciplined?
Please what would you do if you were in my shoes?Reply urgently

:d

What Feelings? I really cant understand if she has feelings for u in the first place, u were not clear about that. Is she in luv with u? she could believe in u without necessarily being in luv with u, U know ur needs and wants, Sounds like she'll date u if u want but pls keep her as a friend if u know u wont treat her as she'd expect. Good luck

lol lol

In terms of being born-again,two uneven yokes can never make it i.e. if your kind of girl is to be a born-again like you,then u still have a long way to go.U said you like this girl but because she is not born-again,you don't want to have anything intimate to do with her.This is a simple arithmetic:Why not preach to her or something like that?It could make a difference.But una born wuru wuru sef too much.
Try bringing her close To God and if she listens,GOODLUCK and if otherwise,find ya square root.

Tnx nana,
Like you rightly said, I could try preaching to her, but the issue is that she has told so many times that she loves me but i dont want to raise her hopes when I trully do not love her as much as she deserves. She is indeed a lovely person and i dont want to hurt her, I wouldnt want her to become born again because of me but because she has seen the light. Thanks.

U aint ''cruel'' or ''disciplined'' just looks to me as if U're scared of giving out ya heart to any girl but a man's gotta take chances

Da best realtionship is one where the girl loves ya more!!!, best believe it!! when a guy loves a girl more it's called SEX

My advice to you is to take sometime off and sort out ur feelings maybe u would realise she's the one for you or maybe not!

When she loves u more, life is good!!!

Tonn,

I like you honesty and wanting to do God's will. Now you are torn between your feelings and doing what you feel is the right. If you truly are born again then it means the Holy Spirit is not strange to you. Talk to me him. I mean exactly how you feel. In fact whether you talk to him or not, he knows what you are going through.

Tell him your thoughts towards this girl and ask him to guide you through it to do the right thing. I am sure he will lead you into all truths.

Another thing you should not do is lead this girl. As long as you know that nothing will work out between two of you at least as long as your current spiritual dipositions are, LET HER KNOW. Let her know what you will not ldo. Do not lead her on and later now find a born again like yourself and now tell her that you have find someone.

Let her make the decision of either being just your friend or moving on since she is not ready t embrace your spiritual stand.

But watch it. Don't lead her on. You will feel as guilty as going out with her in the first place

@ tonn, Ur story doesn't seem complete to me. U've just praised her and said all the good things bout her and stuffs she did 4 u. she seem to really like u

wat seem to be the problem if she's ur idea gurl? the fact that she's not born again? there's anotha gurl u're eyeing??

tonn:

I don't know on which side of the divide i stand, disciplined or cold hearted. I have this young, beautiful and attractive lady, a graduate, homely and with good moral upbringing, just the kind of girl i would like to have, but i don't seem to share her feelings. We are very good friends and i mean best of friends but i don't want to take it any further than that.
Once she collected my resume to help me in search of a job, and she has never asked me for a dime, instead she's been very supportive and believes so much in me. She is a christian but not yet bornagain, and I'm born-again, but worst still is that i love her, but not enough to start up a romance with her. Am i cruel or disciplined?
Please what would you do if you were in my shoes?Reply urgently

Man this is just the way GOD works in a man's life. The way of the ALMIGHTY is not the way of man. You don't have to love her initially and if it's the will of GOD, ur love for her will evetually develope well. Remember it's always better if she loves you more than u love her. Don't worry, when u eventually build that love for her, u will be thanking GOD 24 hours a day for given u such a caring wife.