Marry someone you love exactly as they are, and be sure they feel the same. That way, you’ll never expect more of each other than you are each happy to give. I didn’t realize this until my second marriage. Another secret? Don’t get married until you’re sure of who you are.

Steps For A successful Happy Marriage Life

1 Go to bed angry if you want to. It has often been said that a couple should never let the sun set on an argument, but this is a bit unrealistic. Some arguments are, by their nature, two-day events: too much is at stake to set an arbitrary bedtime deadline. Faced with a stark choice between closure and a night’s sleep, you’re better off with the latter in almost every case. I’ve gone to bed angry loads of times, with no particular deleterious effects. You don’t actually stay angry. It’s a bit like going to bed drunk; you wake up feeling completely different, if not better. Steps For A successful Happy Marriage Life

2 Marriages and other long-term relationships have a significant public element. Like an iceberg, the bulk of a marriage is hidden from view, but the top bit, the bit that you take out to parties and show off, should appear exemplary to outsiders: charming without being cloying; happy without being giddy; entertainingly spiky, but also mutually respectful. Above all, the whole thing should look effortless. Everybody knows marriage is hard; no one wants to watch you do the work. I’m not saying that faking it in public is the key to marital success, but if you get this front-of-house stuff wrong, it will eventually have an impact on your actual relationship.

3 Don’t make the time you spend together too special. Spending time together is important, but it shouldn’t feel important, otherwise it creates undue pressure to enjoy yourselves. You don’t have to go on a mini-break or light candles every time. Doing normal, everyday things as a couple counts as relationship maintenance, much in the same way that hoovering counts as exercise. Walking the dog counts. Eating breakfast together counts. Wandering aimlessly through a deserted shopping precinct together counts. Watching TV together doesn’t count, unfortunately, although I’m currently appealing this.

4 When it comes to questions such as “How do I look in this?” “Do sideburns suit me?” “Are these trousers all right?” and “Do you like my new hair cut?” everyone, male or female, appreciates something that sounds like an honest answer. This is not necessarily the same as an honest answer.
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