Class 5: Unlikely Heroes, Unlikely Powers, Unlikely Circumstances (part I)

Background: Class 5 if a tweet fiction story written live on twitter...this is just the beginning

Inside of us lies immeasurable power...waiting to be set free!

I hate school! But not for the reasons you think. You see my mind…its different. I can feel the thoughts around me. #ofilix

Not hear them…feel them! #ofilix

I mean I could feel the pain of ChiChi…the hottest chick in class…the stunner. The one Emeka & Ayo fantasize about every minute. #ofilix

I know it, cause I can feel their thoughts too. Their dirty teenage thoughts. #ofilix
But back to ChiChi…curly long hair, tall, pretty and smart all packed into a body of perfection. The most popular girl in class. #ofilix

Correction: The most popular girl in school. #ofilix

Everyone wants to be like her even boys&especially girls. Girls like Happiness. I don’t need to read her thoughts to figure that out #ofilix

But if only she knew. if only she know the pain, the abuse, the suffering and the emptiness that ChiChi feels…that Chichi suffers #ofilix

But my thoughts are cut short. Its our English teacher…equipped with the cleanest British accent. So clean the Queen would blush.#ofilix

With my ability…I should pass all my classes. And I do…simply by listening to the thoughts of the smarter kids! #ofilix

Now I am not a Lazy Cheat. I do study and I love science. And I crave to listen to the conversations in people’s minds. #ofilix

Their different perspectives, help give me a well rounded view point and comprehensive answers in Tests and Exams. #ofilix

But sadly my powers are useless against English or any Language for that matter. #ofilix

You see there is no right or wrong answer most of the times in English and as for Yoruba, well people think in Yoruba. #ofilix

And that does not help me =( #ofilix

So you can understand how I feel at this moment. The start of English period…the fake accents. It gives me a headache! #ofilix

Not just any headache! Not the take-one-panadol-and-be-fine headache. Its the what the Bleep is inside my head headache! #ofilix

Actually my headaches started 2 weeks ago. Roughly around the time I entered Chichi’s mind. I think she felt me inside her head #ofilix

Cause she has been looking at me funny. I mean nobody looks at me under normal circumstances. Headaches…headaches…headaches #ofilix

Its a deep throbbing headache. As if something artificial is in my head, pressing against my skull behind my left eye. It hurts… #ofilix

Just like the dreams for the past 2 weeks…it hurts. In my dreams its the same scene. #ofilix

I am kissing a hot chick…sometimes its Genevieve, other times its Halle berry. I think last night it was Michelle Obama =/ #ofilix

But it never goes beyond the kiss. I want to go further, but every time I think the thoughts…I feel something cold behind my head. #ofilix

I hear the trigger squeeze…I see the chamber turn. I smell the spark impact the bullet and i feel it caress the barrel of the gun #ofilix

I even compute the velocity of the bullet…but nothing ever happens. Or maybe it does. But I always wake up at that part #ofilix

I always wake up, with a throbbing headache! The same headache I now felt in class during my dreaded English peroid. #ofilix

The headache…my head. The dream…the gun…the kiss…what does it all mean? What does it mean? What does it mean? #ofilix

“What does it mean?” my English teacher yells angrily, nearly exposing her hidden Nigerian accent. #ofilix

“What does what mean?” I respond almost startled. “What does Irony mean?” she yells. “I am sorry I don’t know” is my response #ofilix

The whole class laughs at my response. My inability to define Irony. #ofilix

“How can a boy who enters peoples minds fail to see what’s going on in his head?” That is the real irony…to be continued at http://ofilispeaks.com #ofilix

Interesting.

This is my first time commenting on this section though I visit often, n I tell u this is really cool!

Pastor Olu T: This is my first time commenting on this section though I visit often, n I tell u this is really cool!

o wow...cool...thanks for the comment!

Sometimes what we perceive as our weakness...is actually our greatest strength!

Class 5: Unlikely Heroes, Unlikely Powers, Unlikely Circumstances (part II)
The Not So Happy Weirdo

WARNING: EXPLICIT CONTENT

I hate school! Like really fucking hate school. #ofilix

My name is Happiness, but I rarely smile. I guess my nickname should be Oxymoron, cause that's really how I feel #ofilix

I mean who the Bleep names their child "Happiness?" Of all the names in the world! "Happinesss" what there to be happy about? #ofilix

I have pimples more active than an Oil Well. My hair is as Kinky as a stripper in a strip club. And my LIPS...LARGE. #ofilix

My life is not a fairy tale and definitely not a caterpillar waiting to become a butterfly. Its a caterpillar fighting for survival #ofilix

A caterpillar stuck in a class full of butterflies. Why? I have no boobs, my ass is nothing to write home about. And my hair... #ofilix

Well let's not go there. I wish I was like Chichi with long curly hair and skin the texture of luscious leather. Everyone likes her #ofilix

But I hate her. "Why is she so fucking perfect!" sorry for cursing. I curse a lot, but in my head. I am too weak to get punished. #ofilix

At least there is Physics. o physics...Mr. Boateng, our physics teacher. The only one who knows I exist. The only one who listens... #ofilix

Why only yesterday, I told him how I was able to recharge my TIGER battery by simply rubbing it in my hair. #ofilix

I know he thought I was lying but it was true....well at least he listened. Cause no one else would. No one #fml #ofilix

I wish someone would though. Because of late my body has been changing. Not puberty...cause I still have no fucking boobs. #ofilix

Or maybe it is...who knows. I mean last night, I could swear the light bulb in our hostel, flickered every time I blinked. #ofilix

And let's not forget about the fact that I have never gotten malaria! I mean in Nigeria! That like not having AIDS in... #ofilix

You know what...never mind. The crazy fact is not the malaria but the fact that I have never been bitten by a mosquito in my life #ofilix

Something about me pushes them away...repels them. I am like super insect repellant! #ofilix

But there was that one day...the day I hit my head on the dormitory lockers. I mean like wtf...who leaves lockers oepn in the dark NEPA light? #ofilix

The requires several stitches and a not so flattering bald cut. Not the best days of my life. #ofilix

It was not because of the mockery...I mean Mrs. No Boobs...I am used to that already.#ofilix

It was the fact that I got bitten by insects...all sorts of insects. Not a big deal under normal circumstances, but this was quite different. #ofilix

I had never been bitten by an insect before! So you can understand I did not react too well. But as soon as my hair came back... #ofilix

The bites stopped. I think my hair has something to do with everything. #ofilix

That's not the sort of thing you tell people. They might think I am crazier than I already am. And I think I am crazy enough. #ofilix

"What does irony mean!" the teacher yells. Breaking my thought pattern. I realize that i am still in fucking English class. #ofilix

And that poor bloke, the daydreamer has no idea what the answer is. Poor chap, but brilliant. I wonder what he dreams about. #ofilix

Probably girls with big boobs...fine girls with no pimples. Definitely not me...the funny one. The weird one...the Oxymoron. #ofilix

#Oxymoron A girl named "Happiness" that fucking hates herself and the world. To be continued at http://ofilispeaks.com ... #ofilix

Even more interesting.

i love this.

It's not what you look at that matters,
it's what you see
- Henry David Thoreau

Part III (Who Am I?): My name is Chichi...and I hate my bleeping bosoms! Yes my bosoms! #ofilix

Sometimes, I just wish I could cut them off and put them in a DHL package and mail them back to God! #ofilix

I can't walk into a room without them being the center of attention. It's always them...not me. Never me. #ofilix

I can't lie, they have gotten me favors in the past. But they weigh me down more than they pull me up. #ofilix

I long for that feeling. The feeling of being invisible. The feeling of walking into a room without a 1000 people starring. #ofilix

Or accidentally grazing my chest =/ #ofilix

And my curly hair and half-caste skin don't help fend the attention. Both products of the fusion between my Dad and Mum. #ofilix

My Dad a white Oil&Gas expat, who knocked up my Mum a Nigeria..in a Luxury hotel on the Island. At least it was a luxury hotel..sigh #ofilix

If you ask my Mum she would tell a different story. She likes to act like she is above prostituting but that's what she is. #ofilix

And me...the convenient mistake. Under normal circumstances I should not be here. I should be aborted...unknown...unborn. #ofilix

But luckily my Dad was loaded. So my Mum kept me as her bridge to success. She swears she loves me....but I think not. #ofilix

The only thing she loves is the fact that she can financially exploit my Dad with me. At least I am alive... #sarcasm #ofilix

I wish I was dead. My life is a bleeping depressing dump. I smile as a decoy to cove rup the emptiness inside. An abused child #ofilix

Abused physically, emotionally and ... #ofilix

The first time it happened I was 12...but my bosoms were already 22! #ofilix

Too young to understand, too young to fight. So I just stayed there...like a b##% abused till he came or got tired. I can't remember #ofilix

He being one of my Mum's clients in her imaginary world of No-I-am-not-a-prostitute but yet bleeping all around the place. #ofilix

It happened so fast and left me scarred, physically and emotionally. Blood splattered over my bed covers...blood of innocence gone #ofilix

And my Mum. I tried to tell her the 1st time it happened. But my words were terminated with a slap and a.... #ofilix

"why is there blood all over your bed covers I just washed those sheets. Do you think I am your servant." and then another slap #ofilix

I kept quiet after that. I realized at that point...at 12d, that if I was to make it thru life. It will be me, nobody but me. #ofilix

People like to say the world has some good in it. But I think there are parts of the world that are filled with evil people. #ofilix

My classmates think I am blessed. They don't know about the suicide thoughts, the depression, the abuse. But yet I smile. #ofilix

To be honest, I can deal with the intimate abuse. I have become numb to it, one day I will be stronger, I will fight back. #ofilix

But what hurts the most is not having a father figure. He is too busy drilling for Oil in the ground & in the beds of luxury hotels. #ofilix

He must be good, cause he gets paid and look, he drilled inside my Mum and created me. #sarcasm #ofilix

At least I get some respite at my boarding school. Away from the turmoil, from the abuse just for a few days. #ofilix

I can't like its a nice school. At least my fake Dad knows the value of an education or maybe he is making up for his absence. #ofilix

He never fails to pay my school fees. But probably does not remember my birthday. How can he? #ofilix

Rumor has it that the day I was born, he was bleeping another woman. #ofilix

At least in school I am a celebrity. I take that back, my bosoms & hair are celebrities. I am just the limo that transports them #ofilix

But I act the part...the part of the limo driver watching all my bosoms fake friends smile. Like they actually like me. #ofilix

Even teachers get in on the action. Last week, the English teacher told me how great a writer I was. That's funny, I write like crap #ofilix

The English teacher loved it though & hugged me in a funny this-is-inappropriate-way. Did I mention, our English Teacher is female #ofilix

But it was hilarious seeing her face when I wrote about the student who killed an absive teacher with a fork. #wink #ofilix

I may be weak, but I have my way of fighting back. I don't think he will try that again. #ofilix
O did I mention, I got pregnant last year. No big deal thought, I handled it. Maybe if the guy was a rich expat I would have kept it #ofilix

But sadly it was the bleeping Physics teacher with his beat up Toyota Camry and fake smile. #ofilix

I swear that guy will Bleep anything with 2 legs, even an Ostrich. #ofilix

I would like to say he abused me..but I knew what I was getting into. I let it happen or did I? #ofilix

Sometimes I think the problem is that I smile too much. I keep everything inside...I need to get angry a lot more. #ofilix

But the last time I got angry, I almost killed someone. I promise I am not violent...just frustrated. #ofilix

It was 2 weeks ago. Another senior boy trying to act or lovey on me. I smile and try to move on, but this one will not agree. #ofilix

He became really aggressive and insulting. Call me a LovePeddler and my father a crook. #ofilix

I don't know what tripped inside, but I got really angry. Like a fresh anger, I just imagined myself crushing his head. #ofilix

But then I realized he was no longer yelling at me. He was just yelling and grabbing his head as blood came down his nose #ofilix

I was too terrified and confused...I just bolted out the room. #ofilix

"What does this mean?" my English Teacher yells. She is talking to the Daydreamer. #ofilix

That dude is always lost. I wonder what the Bleep he thinks about...and in the last few days he has been looking at me funny. #ofilix

Funny, because he is not starring at my bosoms, he is actually looking at me. Maybe he knows what happened. Maybe he saw #ofilix

What did I do? What can I do? Who am I? to be continued.... #ofilix

The Okada Riders Special Son

It has been said that most revolutions are not caused by revolutionaries in the first place, but by the stupidity and brutality of governments. -Sean MacStiofan

There are 20 people in the world on record with hyperthymesia. I think I am the 21st! #ofilix

I know, what the heck is hyperthymesia? Well let's just say I can remember every single day of my life since birth! #ofilix

Like everything! Give me a date, any date and I will tell you exactly what I wore, whether it rained and how many times I sat down. #ofilix

I have had this extraordinary condition ever since i was a child. In fact...I can remember being pulled out of my Mum's vagina. #ofilix

It was at LUTH hospital and there was no light, just candles. #ofilix

You hear about babies born with bibles, rosaries and korans...well I was born with an incredible memory. #ofilix

I know what you are thinking. "Boy you must be lucky!" But I am not, because with the good memories...come the bad ones... #ofilix

Remembering every detail profoundly...means I also re-experience the pain as well. Like the morning of October 22nd. to be contd... #ofilix

Just joking. #ofilix

October 22nd, 1993. My father a proud okada driver. One of the only men who felt pride in driving an okada (sigh) #ofilix

As he does every morning, he was dropping me off at my primary school. #ofilix

I clung to his back as I always did. As he navigated the rough and rugged...almost non existent roads of Port-harcourt. #ofilix

I clung to him tightly as only a young 10 year old would. We were almost at the school gate when we got stopped by police officers #ofilix

They wanted to inspect my Dad's papers. His okada papers. I guess they did not know my dad. Meticulous was his nick name #ofilix

All his papers were neatly packaged and stapled together. Nothing was amiss. The officers searched and searched for something. #ofilix

That missing thing that officers mysteriously search for. That excuse to seize a bike and extort money. But nothing. #ofilix

He handed the papers back to my Dad and we began heading towards school. We had almost reached school when I heard "Oga!" #ofilix

"Oga come here" "why is your tail light broken?" #ofilix

My Dad put the okada to a screeching halt in near disbelief. "Broken tail light? but the light still works" he responded. #ofilix

But the officers were having none of that. They had found their morning breakfast. Their Milo and Tea. And it was my Dad. #ofilix

Before I could say NEPA. We were surrounded by 3 officers and thrown off the bike. But my Dad...he hung on. #ofilix

He held on to that bike, like his life depended on it. Because it did. That was all our family had. That one bike. #ofilix

But did the officers care? No. They just pulled the bike, dragging my Dad along with it...hoping that he would let go. #ofilix

But he didn't. And then it happened. First a push, and then a punch, and then a kick. But my Dad still held on. And they continued. #ofilix

Beating, punching, trying to separate my Dad from his bike. As the entire school watched and I stood there...ashamed and angry. #ofilix

I would like to say my Dad fought of the police officers like Jackie Chan. Or some good Samaritan came to help. #ofilix

But this was Nigeria. Shit like that never happens. My Dad lay there beaten, bruised and humbled. Beaten like a dog. #ofilix

And for what. A cracked tail light? a freaking tail light. #ofilix

Thanks to hyperthymesia...I remember every second, every detail of that event. In fact it plays in my head over and over again. #ofilix

My dad, the one who always preached honesty, hardwork and respect. But what did he get in return? Bleep honesty! #ofilix

On the flip side, my memory has gotten me through school easily. I mean with a Nigerian system that encourages cramming...i excel. #ofilix

I just memorize my class notes and regurgitate it during exams and am done. A's all the way. #ofilix

That's why i got the highest score in the national common entrance exam and got a full scholarship to Adams Private Academy. #ofilix

Under normal circumstances the son of an okada driver will not dream of being here. But I am. #ofilix

Quite frankly I find the school boring, the teachers fake & students...weird. Its no surprise,I skip class a lot for more fun things #ofilix

and no, not chicks or smoking or all that kind of stuff. I like putting stuff together...gadgets. #ofilix

I once retrofitted my Dad's okada to run of vegetable oil, after reading about alternate energy in a book. made a lot of money. #ofilix

But no one believed us...they actually laughed at us. O well...their loss. #ofilix

Today i skipped English class. I can't stand that teachers fake accent. Always wanted to sound more british than James Bond. #ofilix

I need to find a pressure transducer...to finish up my latest device... It would be a crazy device...my greatest invention yet. #ofilix

The only thing is how do I get back to school without getting caught? to be continued. #ofilix

Class 5 if a tweet fiction story written live on twitter by @ofilispeaks...this is just the beginning

I'm really really loving dis! Abeg continue o....

this is getting better...

@ofilispeaks, my namesake, I'm just happy u weren't in a certain short story competition a while ago! This is crazy stuff man, well done. A little fear though - how r u going to bring all these kids together? Well, already following!

When I read your, HOW STUPIDITY SAVED MY LIFE. I knew you are more than anyone could bargain for, and then this! I will be your ardent follower from now on, you write with a norm outside any contextual whatnots I have ever seen. Cleans seat.

Meklex: When I read your, HOW STUPIDITY SAVED MY LIFE. I knew you are more than anyone could bargain for, and then this! I will be your ardent follower from now on, you write with a norm outside any contextual whatnots I have ever seen. Cleans seat.

Came in no update, read this, run off to the search engine for "How stupidity saved my life"!

Ofilix is the untapped fictional half of @ofilispeaks. ofilix is 33.54% human and 66.46% mutant and still mutating. His powers…the uncanny ability to fuse real life world with the fictional world seamlessly and project them across the world wide internet. He has no twitter account or facebook page and abhors instagram. ofilix believes in equality and democracy but is willing to go to extreme limits to ensure that justice prevails, even if it means trampling on the rights of the truly evil!

ofilispeaks: Ofilix is the untapped fictional half of @ofilispeaks. ofilix is 33.54% human and 66.46% mutant and still mutating. His powers…the uncanny ability to fuse real life world with the fictional world seamlessly and project them across the world wide internet. He has no twitter account or facebook page and abhors instagram. ofilix believes in equality and democracy but is willing to go to extreme limits to ensure that justice prevails, even if it means trampling on the rights of the truly evil!

lol, I can relate with this.

Meklex: When I read your, HOW STUPIDITY SAVED MY LIFE. I knew you are more than anyone could bargain for, and then this! I will be your ardent follower from now on, you write with a norm outside any contextual whatnots I have ever seen. Cleans seat.

Where can I find that, searched for it n couldn't find it?

Search Google or download okadabooks app from play store

Meklex: Search Google or download okadabooks app from play store

Kk thanks, I was thinking it was on NL. BTW where is this man to update?