@dhortun are you a kid? Bottle water?...let me order vodka for you jawe

Folarinwazzy: @sugarbabe where is thee? Thy had been expecting thee since

bobo I'm here oooo, been busy lately, now I'm back wonderin what papa james is abt tellin him, more ink 2 ur pen.

o boi i dey feel ur story like kiló dè

@sugarbabe if you hadn't come back,I would have stopped updating @battnis I never even start

"James you are going to uk and stay with your uncle there,you might further your education there"my dad said,it was too much to take in all at once,I was shocked beyond any reasonable explanation.

"What? Kindly come again sir"I said,I had to be sure of what I heard

"You heard me right and you are going next month,your visa is gonna be ready in 2weeks time,and I need you to go take some passports"he said angrily and I knew he was damn serious,I was both angry and excited,but I decided to show my anger first

"That's so sudden,you didn't even ask for my opinion"I said angrily

"I won't open my eyes and let you become something else in Nigeria"he replied

"I have to go to my room right now,this is too much to take in,does this have anything to do with yesterday incidence"I asked

"Yeah,it has everything to do with yesterday incidence,I knew exactly what happened,my friend saw you in a police van,I didn't know what you did and I don't care to know,but my guess is that you stole or you are into some kinda online fraudulent activities. I'm ashamed of you,you have almost everything you want,I should have insisted that you go to a private university last year but you declined my generous and humble offer in order for you to engage yourself in illegal activities and tarnish my image"he paused,then continued"well,I don't have much to say,you are going to uk next week and that's final" he stood up and went to his room.

I was mesmerised,I didn't know where he got all those silly ideas,stealing and yahoo yahoo. I was dumb founded and couldn't talk,this was when it occurred to me that I can't do anything about the uk stuff,I walked like a zombie to my room. I sat on my bed and replayed the whole event,I laid on my bed and didn't know when I slept off.

I woke up by 9am,the usual time I do wake up,I knew no one was going to be at home. I went to the parlour took my money under the arm rest of the couch. I brushed my teeth,then went to my usual amala joint,then I thought about yesterday event and I lost mt appetite,I was surprised that I had no appetite,I paid and left the joint without eating more than a handful of amala.

As I walked home,I noticed that someone was following me,in order to be sure I turned back and headed for the amala joint to make it seem I forgot something and the person was still following me,by this time I was sure someone was following me,infact they were two,I didn't have to enter the amala joint cos that would make me disadvantageous so I turned back and started walking faster,they did the same and I took to my heels and ran to barracks,my friend do live there and I was sure that they couldn't follow me into the barrack.

Bin de ur bck.

@tmamuda me know say you dey my back na sugarbaba,dhortun and ifyeky me no see oo

Folarinwazzy: @sugarbabe if you hadn't come back,I would have stopped updating @battnis I never even start

awwwww, dats sweet, I told u I'm back nd beta,gat ur back bro! bt I hope say james go escape these guys o, btw sugarbaba ke?

Sugarbabe don answer present

It now remains ifyeky and dhortun

Folarinwazzy: It now remains ifyeky and dhortun

I'm here but ur updates r short. Abeg update fast fast

8


I ran into Yinka's parlour,it wasn't locked and I was panting uncontrollable. Yinka was an army son,a senior army so his house was nicely decorated,the parlour was slightly large. He his about my age but very slim and tall,he doesn't look like an army's son at all. If you get what I mean.

"Guy,what's wrong with you"he asked as he stood up from the chair he was sitting when I ran in

"Some guys were after me,so I ran here cos I know this is a safe place"I replied

"Hmm..do you know why they are after you"

"I'm not sure but I can guess"

"That means you've stepped on someone toes recently"

"Its more like he stepped on my toe and I relaliated"I said

"So who's this person?"

"Emeka,and I know he's an aiye member so I guess it's his fellow aiye member that are after me"I replied

"This is serious,It's been long I saw you and now you come to my house when you are in trouble"he said slightly annoyed

"I'm sorry"was all I could say

"So what are you going to do now?"He asked

"What do you suppose I do"I asked back

"You should go and apologise to Emeka"he said

"Hmmm..that's a nice idea,I'd go to his house later"

"Don't you have his digit,what if you are ambushed before you go to his house"

"Aii,lemme call him"I said and dialled his number,he didn't pick at first but after trying again continuously,he finally picked the call,

"Guy your papa dey craze?why you dey call me"he screamed his lung out at the other end of the line,I was tempted to tell him that at least my dad wasn't as wretched as his dad but the motive behind me calling him still stands

"Guy,take am easy nawh,why you dey para"I said calmly

"You dey ask me bastard question after you don disfigure my fine face"he replied

"We be boys nawh,we just freestyle hand to hand small and you come dey take am personal,when we no be girls"I wined

"Who tell you say I take am personal,shey you beat me ni,na because I just let you win me"he said and I couldn't help but laugh,"this nigga is cray"I thought to myself

"Since you no take am personal,make I go shaye for you nawh and abeg call back your aiye boys before they injure me oo"I said

"Guy no go vex me oo,which aiye boys,you think say shame go allow me open mouth talk say someone wey I old pass beat me reach this level"he replied angrily and I knew he wasn't lieing,I was confused and I didn't know what to say or do,after a while I considered the probability that he was lieing

"Guy abeg nawh,me be your guy,I..."I said before he cut in

"Ogbenni if na play stop am oo me no dey mood",he said before ending the call

I was sure he didn't know about it and I didn't know what to do,well what I'm to do is to just try as much as possible to stay at my house and lock the door always for just one month. Yinka then asked,

"Doesn't he knows about it?"

"Yeah,he don't"

"He might be lieing,how can you just believe him?"

"I know Emeka very well,he wasn't the one"I paused and continued,"I have to go home now,and I need your help"

"How may I help you?"

"I don't know if those guys are still hanging around so go outside and stop a bike for me right in front of the barrack gate,then call my digit"I told him

"Aii,nice idea"

I waited for his call,then he eventually called me,I took the bike home,checked around for anything out of the usual when I got down then entered my apartment

U de fear so, n u called urself d lagos if de catch na u go ans dat one.

How I no go fear,I smart nawh na so I take escape them

Lol , nd I hope dats nt all for today...

@sugarbabe your teeth is sparkling white

9

It was already saturday,I rarely go out because I'm sure some guys wanna hurt me and I now know why,on thursday Funmi came to my house and told me to be careful,that a cultist member asked her out and when she said no,he told her that if he couldn't have her no one else could have her,when I asked her how he knew me,she said he knew me through her friend,when I narrated my ordeal with them to her,she told me she would take care of it and when I asked her how she was gonna go about that,she started caressing me but I didn't respond,then she promised me everything was going to be alright. I told her I wasn't in the mood and politely dismissed her. Then she called me to tell me she has taken care of it and I can now go out if I want. I've lost interest in the relationship,moreover I'm travelling soon so what's the use,I simply called off the relationship and told her to tell her crazy admirer that we were no longer together.

"So its because of girl my life was in danger,to hell with her"I said to myself as I remembered the conversation we had on thursday and I increased the volume of the home theatre,and listened to Holy grail by jay z

"And its amazing I'm in this maze with you I just can't let you go,
One day you screaming you love me loud the next day you are so cold
Ono day you're here,one day you're ther..." Was the sound coming out of the theatre until a knock on my door interrupted the cool music I was listening to,

"Who's there nawh"I screamed

"Na me chinedu"he screamed back

"Wetin you dey look for"I said as I opened the door

"When I ask my papa say where the money wey he promise me he talk say make I come ask you"

"Come,say I resemble the person wey dey pay your papa salary for work,or if your pman don run down say na me una wan borrow money from"I shouted

"For your life,no ever abuse my pman again oo"

"When he deserve am nko..."As I was about to continue my statement I saw a clenched fist launching towards the direction of my right cheek with the speed of a rocket,baaannn I felt my teeth disconnect from its gum,the effect of the punch was devastating,I staggered backward into my parlour,my parlour has now become a boxing ring. Fist,it was Emeka and now Chinedu,what's with all these igbo people gan self,I thought to myself amidst pain,then he made to give me another deadly punch as he stepped into my parlour,I saw this in time to wave if off with my palm,I also threw a punch at him but he bent down making the punch go over his head,as he bent down he carried me and threw my back on the bare tiled floor,while my back was still aching he sat on me and was ready to bombard my face with heavy blows like I did to his fellow igbo friend 'Emeka',but i can't allow that,the sight of my face being disfigured by his fist energised me,I held his head and gave him a headbutt,he didn't waver,the guy's head was as hard as the ice in titanic. I was the one in pain,as he raised his hand to punch me,I've already calculated the velocity and probability,I dodged it and he hit the tiled floor,he let out a soft groan. I saw this as a divine opportunity,I held his hand and bit it within a blink of an eye,he screamed, "chinekeme oo" as he rolled off me,I ran into the kitchen and came out with an hausa dagger,I never knew how it got there tho but I was happy it was there,when I came outside he was still rolling in pain,my eye was red,full with anger. The thought of him bombarding my face with his clenched fist must have angered me beyond my imagination. When he saw my hausa dagger,he ran outside and I was relieved a little,just when I was about to settle down I saw Chinedu come in with a cutlass,I shivered and feared him for the first time In my life

To be continued,don't forget to comment tho

Hope dat parlour dey well arrange.

I've not been around for a while, but i'm here now.
Great work done, give us more...

Good job dude ...........next update

"You think say I go fear you" I said to chinedu vibrating like a vibrator as he started swinging his cutlass skillfully,that's the effect of too much korean films,I was still with my hausa dagger,if I fight him with the hausa dagger,na sure death be that. Then he started coming towards my direction. it's better I throw the knife at him and launch at him before he could recuperate."Na once man dey die"I consoled myself

When he was almost where I was,I threw the knife,I didn't target him in order for me not to go to jail,it was all a scheme,he moved away completely from the speed of the knife even through it wasn't launched at him,I ran with all my might and before he could recuperate I've given him a deadly uppercut making his cutlass fall down,then a straight punch to his eye. When he gained back his composure,he was still staggering backwards,I moved back and picked up his cutlass,when he saw me with a cutlass,he ran like a mad man and I pursued him till he entered his parlour.

"Why you no wait make I cut your d''ick"I shouted and walked back to my apArtment after dropping the cutlass at the entrance of his door. I always thought igbo boys were stubborn I never knew that cutlass do have a negative impact on them.I locked the door this time around,I was frustrated and angry,but I continued listening to holy grail. My phone started ringing after an hour,Afeez was the caller

"Hello"I said

"howfar jamb result don come out oo"he told me

"Alright make I quickly check am"I told him and ended the call

I quickly went to jamb site with my bb,but I couldn't check my result with it then I went to take my dad's laptop in his room,the modem was already inserted,I went to their website,typed my reg no and surname and waited for a minute. Then I saw my name and other shi't. I just scrolled down and I saw my score 201. Though I didn't need it but still I was annoyed,how would I score 201 after paying a huge sum of amount,na God go punish Afeez. I picked my phone and called him immediately

"Hello"afeez greeted

"No greet me oo,you dey mad and you go dey call yourself don,na 201 I score for jamb oo"I screamed out

"You pass 200,and you no happy no be your fault,me no get any business with you again"he said and ended the call,"what arrogance"I said to myself,to hell with jamb and their score. I resumed my music

*************************************

I was still sleeping when I heard a deafening sound,someone was knocking the door when I checked the time it was still 3:30am. Everybody has woken up and we were all in the parlour,we were all visibly scared

"Who's that"my dad asked with a shaky voice,so na only mouth this mouth get shu

"Na we the owners"

, owners of the moni don cme o, he fit be chinedu nd him papa handwork, God go pass dem.

Everybody was scared,there was tension in the air,even my dad that used to form James bond was shaking,I quickly entered the room and picked my q10 and bold 5,kept it inside the bathroom,inside a soap case.

"If una no open the door we go break am oo"they screamed,by this time I was already under my bed. There was silence,but those people that called theirselves 'the owners' were dumb oo,did they actually expect us to open the door. A gunshot interrupted my stupid thought,followed by a scream 'yeeh,egbami ooo' that was my dad's voice. That was when it dawned on me that they've entered the sitting room,they probably shot the lock of the door. Kayode,my mom and dad were all in the parlour except from me,I was under the bed. Then I heard a voice

"Oya all of you lie down,shey na everybody be this"a voice shouted

"Ye..yes oo"my dad stammered

"Oya go check all the rooms quickly,we no get pass 15 minutes" the same voice instructed

The door to my room was opened by an unknown person,and when he searched the room my heart was beating so fast,then I felt a hand on my leg,then the hand dragged me out from where I was hiding,then I saw a man with big head,long neck,thin body,long hand and short legs. His face was the ugliest and meanest face I've ever seen,bance has hope near this monstrous being. He pointed a gun to my d"ick and ordered me to stand up. I stood up and he took me to the parlour,when I got to the parlour,there were two other thieves in the parlour and they were putting on masks. It was only the one that came to drag me from where I was hiding that was not putting on a mask.

I saw my mom,dad and kayode prostrating,it was like they were smelling the floor.

"Sheyb you talk say na only three of you dey house"a masked giant said,his voice was like that of great khali,I saw my dad tremble. Before he could say anything he slapped my dad,the sound was like a gunshot. My dad didn't scream or move,I was proud of him.

"Where you keep the money you carry come from work today?"The masked giant asked my dad but there was no response

"You no dey hear ni" but there was still no response,when he turned my pman that was we realised that he had fainted. So the slap was that terrible I thought to myself.

Then he faced me,

"So na you dey hide abi"the masked giant said and started walking towards me

"No oo,I been dey sleep I come fall down from my bed,from roll under the bed"I lied stupidly. I felt a thunderous slap on my cheek,it was as if my head fell off my neck. I started rolling,I fell down and my eyes closed.

I woke up in a hospital,I was on drip and I was the only person in my room. My phone wasn't with me,I was wearing a strange cloth.

What happened to me??

Kip it comin we are almost dia

Yes, we are...

Folarinwazzy: @dhortun are you a kid? Bottle water?...let me order vodka for you jawe

Ermm...i'm a 'gentleman' but your vodka will have to come with an handful, a babe or two. You know what vodka can do, right?

@dhortun it appears that there are no girls on this thread,and sugarbabe is mine...guess you'd have to manage the vodka..

CH33RS

Nice one. Keep it up.

Mehnnnnn..... D last update was very hilarious, ogbeni pls keep dem comin

I tried to stand up,but the drip was like a lice,it won't allow me to do anything and it was really annoying,I just lay back on the pako bed. I started remembering the events that unfolded before I lost my consciousness,but wait o,was it a slap that made a whole 'James the lagos boy pass out',the thought of it all was annoying,everything was annoying.

Just when I was still frustrated,a nurse came in then I quickly closed my eyes,so she thought I was still unconscious and she started playing with my d"ick like lollipop,I opened my eyes and said,

"What's going on"Her hand was still on my d"ick and I could see shock written all over her face

"Ehm..th..the doctor sai..said I shou..ld give you injection"she stammered

"Are you a stammerer?"I asked

"Definitely not"she replied,she was starting to gain some confidence,that was when I assessed her. She was a little pretty with Full bosoms,her lips were cute,she should be in her early twenties and I decided to play along.

"Please don't remove your hand"I said,she was confused but her hand was still there and I sat up to kiss her before she could say jack,she didn't push me back,she responded fully and she was stroking my d"icK during the process,then she pulled back slowly.

"I will be back"she said in a sexy tone to my ear and catwalked out of my ward

Nawa for me oo,instead of me to ask for what happened I was busy doing rubbish,well sha it was worth it. Some minutes later my mom entered with a cooler.

"Good afternoon ma"I greeted

"Afternoon,you are awake already,how are you feeling?"She inquired

"Fine ma,what happened to me?why am I here?what happened to the thieves?where's Kayode and Daddy?"I inquired tons of questions at once

"Easy,kayode has gone to school,your dad has gone to work,the thieves ran away without taking anything when they heard the sound of siren and when the thief slapped you yesterday you lost your consciousness"she narrated to me,my doubts have been confirmed,how will I explain to my friends when they ask me for what happened,Emeka and Chinedu will sure want to fight round 2. A whole me 'James the Lagos boy'

"Here's your food,I will come back in the evening,the doctor said you will be discharged tomorrow"my mom interrupted my thought,when she spoke finish she left,then I opened the cooler and I saw fried rice garnished with salad and chicken. Why is it that when someone is sick its either fried rice and chicken or jollof rice and chicken they will bring for that person. Well,that's not my business,I ate it all. I was already tired,just when I was about to sleep the nurse slipped in,switched off the light and said,

"We have only 30 minutes"

"For wh..."I was interrupted with a hot kiss,during the kissing session my hands found their way to her bosoms and started working wonders,she was moaning into my mouth,just then the door opened,and someone switched on the light..

@laride and emperor,thanks...your comments are highly weLcome