Dear NwaVic,

I’ve been following your blog for a while now and thought maybe you could give me your thoughts. I recently got married, 6 months ago to be exact and my husband and I are just settling into our marriage and getting to know each other. I am 29 and my husband is 32. We moved to Lagos 3 months ago when my husband’s job transferred him. We just bought a nice house and are getting settled in. I’m loving married life and soon we’ll start trying to have a baby. This is bliss and I hope it stays this way. When we first moved, my 22 year old cousin asked if my husband could get her into his office to do her NYSC which I pushed for and he did successfully. Yesterday, she asked me if she could stay in our house while she serves. My cousin is very attractive- even prettier than me. From growing up with her, I’ve never had reason to think she is promiscuous but these days, you never know. According to my husband’s friends, before he met me, he was a player. I love my cousin and I hate to sound insecure but I’m nervous about this. Is it a good idea to move my cousin in? I’ll appreciate your input. Thanks.

Sincerely,

Unsettled in Ikoyi

Response here: http://www.jaguda.com/2013/11/11/dear-nwavic-let-22-yr-old-cousin-move-new-matrimonial-home/

My dear, ur husband is still young and prone to seduction. If u guys can afford a house in Ikoyi, then I see no reason why u guys can't rent a self-contained accommodation for ur cousin just to clear all doubts; cos like u rightly said..."U never know"!
She might not be a threat but she would have friends who could.

No! No!! No!!!. Your marriage is still very young,pls avoid anything that could cause wahala.At this early stage,u need to form a solid relationship wif ur husband without interferance frm any relative.Get a place for ur cousin to stay but not in ur matrimonal home!

no way..it is very unwise and unhealthy for ur young marriage. You sound like you guys are well off, offer to assist her with part of or enough money for her to set up camp elsewhere, a woman of 22 years isn't exactly "inocente" so pls be wise..wishin u all d very best in ur marriage

Don't allow it.#simple!

It can only be ok if ur hubby has a detachable preek,so u can detach and put in ur purse when going out alone.

Chynx: My dear, ur husband is still young and prone to seduction. If u guys can afford a house in Ikoyi, then I see no reason why u guys can't rent a self-contained accommodation for ur cousin just to clear all doubts; cos like u rightly said..."U never know"!
She might not be a threat but she would have friends who could.

Wrong assumption. It possible they are paying back on Mortgages, so buying a property is not actually a sign of excess money

@Topic

Even if she is ugly, don't allow her in. It's just not needed now. You guys need to focus on yourselves for now

A pity but to be candid if she pretty, expect that your husband will eye her at the very least, find another place for her and so give less room to temptation, not every man is 'strong' these days.

My dear pls dnt allow a situation u can avoid cause temptatn in ur marriage....dnt allow her stay with u cos she's all grown up....even if she isnt planning on seducing ur hubby u cant trust her cos she's human and we humans change.

It depends on the date

You will soon be writing to Femi Falana from the confinement of your visitor's room.

Just make sure you buy an extra smart phone now and hide it for effective communication later.

Good luck.

My dear I dnt even think is wise for u to even allow ur cousin work in ur husband office if u feel unease abt her staying wit u, anything can still happen btw them even if u rent a house for her elsewhere. Jst try to trust ur husband pls, get a house elsewhere for ur cousin but still shine ur eyes oh. Working in the same company wit ur husband is bad enough.

You have made the 1st mistake and you are asking us if you could make the second. You have made mistake by allowing her serve in your husband work place. She go dey run tins with your husband from office, sorry. The apartment you will get for her will make the whole thing easier for your husband. She will always request for a lift after work and have a quicky with him either in the car or in her house. I won't lie to you, men like stealing s*x. I would advise you to bring another of your male relation to come stay with her. Your husband will be forced to respect himself. Again, put it in prayer that nothing happens, should anything happen, make she no get bele simple.

Have trust in God, noting will happen. Ameen.

Madam i c doom in that marriage in the future becos age difference is close. Please allow ur cousin to move in dnt be afraid

Seriously and honestly anything that cud happen at your home (which u are avoiding) cud well confidently happen in and from ur husband`s office.
You made d very, very big mistake allowing her work in your husband`s office
Come to think abt it, u are not oblige to giving her any money for renting apartment. If she is a threat to your marriage, then KEEP HER OUT, haba na compulsory. some people cud be foolishly funny (sori for d name calin) why bite ur tongue or play with fire just to appear like a good person. GOD Forbid but na here we dey, no come back here come cry give us cos we no wan hear, we no follow u do better person