PROLOGUE
OK, lemme say this first, I’m an easy going person…… At least, I think I am. But there are some things that just piss me off in a major way, you know? Like you’re so angry, you don’t know whether to laugh or cry. Yeah. So I’m gonna write all about those peeves of mine, it would be nice to find someone who hates the same things I hate.  BTW, note that the hates are not in ascending or descending order, I just write them.
I’m miss.terious & welcome to my world of rants…. *evil smirk* LOL




CHAPTER 1
HATE 1: PEOPLE WHO COOK WITH YOU
I like company in the kitchen but I honestly think life would be easier if people just mind their own business there, yeah? Like don’t freaking tell me how much salt to add to the food I’M cooking, I didn’t ask you. It’s gonna be on MY head if the meal is horrible so GTFO. Whew! I’m just gonna leave you to complete the cooking since you’re such a boss at it. Smh
HATE 2: OLD FASHIONED POEMS
OK, so you like a girl & you decide that the best way you can express your feelings is to use medieval English to befuddle the poor girl. How cool is that?? You don’t need to answer that, it’s not cool. Unless she’s an English Lit major who loves Shakespeare, never do it. OK? OK 
HATE 3: TRIBALISTS
Sadly, they abound everywhere. It’s funny how even though the world is getting more civilized, people are getting more annoying. Grow up, not every Igbo guy is stingy [some are, LOL], not every Yoruba girl is dirty & not every Calabar girl has an insatiable appetite in the bedroom *hmm* Ok, bye
HATE 4: PHONES THAT TAKE FOREVER TO CHARGE
Arghhhh! I don’t even use it for up to 24 hours but it charges all day, honestly. I’m breaking something right now. #HateThisShit. #TooPissedToTalk.
HATE 5: PEOPLE WHO LIKE EVERY STATUS ON FACEBOOK
The like button was created so you could like likeable stuff. Likeable stuff like, “OMG, my boyfriend of 15 years just proposed to me” [Is this even likeable? 15 years? WTF were you guys waiting for?] But anyways, you get the idea. Stuff like this------>>> “My dog just died” *clicks like* “I wanna kill myself now” *clicks like*…….. This is annoying. You deserve to be jailed if you do this. So stop -_-



Umm, if I can get any number of likes on this, I’ll post another chapter so please like & comment. Muah!

A like and a comment...

Following

Following

Thanks, Princesa & Deiok & the anonymous third liker. Updates coming very soon.

CHAPTER 2
HATE 6: HORROR MOVIES
I think it’s weird & I think everyone who watches it is weird too. What’s the whole idea sef? Trying to give yourself a heart attack over nothing…. No, thanks. I’ll pass.
HATE 7: BAD FOOD
I can’t overemphasize the importance of food in my life so if you can’t cook, please don’t lemme taste your food. I’ll hate you, your family, your house, your jobs, even your pets. *shrugs*
HATE EIGHT: [IT RHYMES!!] FAKE GIRLS
Honey, you don’t like football. Stop trying to watch it to impress your crush who prolly hasn’t even noticed you.  I know, I know, truth is bitter. Sorry.
HATE NINE: NOLLYWOOD HATERS
Yeah, they have good reason to hate Nollywood but comparing it to Hollywood is well, just plain dumb. Hate it for the right reasons like “they don’t have a solid storyline” or “the characters are not developed”, not “they can’t even get a gunshot wound right”.
HATE TEN: APPLE PRODUCTS
Oh, yeah, they are very efficient. But why do they have to be so darn expensive 

I know the updates are really short so I could update 3 or 4 chapters per day. And constructive criticism is very very welcome.

CHAPTER 3
HATE 11: PRIVATE UNIVERSITIES BUILT BY CHURCHES
If I was a student of any of those schools, I think I’ll still hate it. Why do the members of the churches contribute to build a school they can’t afford to send their kids to? Which leads me to the next hate…..
HATE 12: PEOPLE BLINDED BY RELIGION
Don’t get me wrong, I’m a Christian. But if your church starts becoming more important than God[or common sense] in your life, you are blinded by religion. You have to retrace your steps before you become a crazy fanatic.
HATE 13: ASTROLOGY
You know, that Virgo, Leo, Scorpio, etc thing… Yeah, it’s complete c.r.a.p. It means nothing. Stars do not determine how your life happens. If you follow it just for fun, cool. But if you start basing all your decisions on what an astrologer who works for a magazine & has never seen you before says, honey, you need help. Like serious psychiatric help. Some people even refuse to marry a guy because of his Zodiac sign. smh
HATE 14: IGNORANT ATHEISTS
I respect everyone’s beliefs [or lack of beliefs in this case] but if you wanna convince me there’s no God, gimme good reasons why you think so. Don’t tell me “Because no one has ever seen Him”. How do you know that?
HATE 15: IGNORANT CHRISTIANS/MUSLIMS
I don’t think it’s possible to convert an atheist by arguing but if you feel like trying it, don’t be sentimental. Present facts, not fairytales. *lips sealed*

But i like horror movies o and am not weird

or am I? hmm..Following

Ms Spaqs: But i like horror movies o and am not weird

or am I? hmm..Following

You're weird Thanks for following

CHAPTER 4
HATE 16: EXCLAMATION MARK
People have misused it so much!!! A perfect example is “I wasn’t yelling at you!!!” *raises eyebrows* Of course, you weren’t. Seriously, people need to learn how to use all the punctuation marks correctly but the exclamation mark is like the most important in that it can make or break relationships.
HATE 17: BAD ENGLISH
If you know how much this one pains me, you’ll understand why it’s on the list. If you’re illiterate, that’s ok. But a graduate who can’t speak good English is a social anathema. Like dude, what were you doing in school? I hate bad English. And the worst part is that those who are guilty of this are usually talkatives. So I plead with thee, in order to make Nigeria a better place, learn how to speak good English or just don’t talk at all. BTW, I’m 17, that’s why I put this as hate 17, it’s a special one.
HATE 18: VISITING A HOSPITAL
Hospitals are really depressing. First, you’re hit with that awful smell of drugs & methylated spirit. Then, you see all those accident victims & their crying family members. Then, you see some nurses who do not act like nurses, I guess they just stop caring about people’s feelings after a while. I know hospitals are important & I know it’s good to visit the sick but I just hate doing it.
HATE 19: PRE MENSTRUAL STRESS
Also known as PMS, it affects a lot of girls[including me]. It comes at that time of the month when you’re expecting something. You become moody & angry & hungry & pissed off all at once all for little or no reason. I’ve figured out a way to deal with it though, I inform my family members & friends about it so they don’t take whatever I say to them personally. But I still hate it.
HATE 20: BISEXUAL PEOPLE
LOL. If you’re a guy & you wanna like guys, that’s your business. IDGAF. But don’t be bisexual, why do you wanna have the best of both worlds? That’s stinginess. The same thing goes for the l.e.s.b.i.a.n.s too. Like only girls or only guys, not both. Duh

Chai i love this, front page in the making.

Continue jare, i love horror film oo and my next story on NL is gonna be horror, so am wired bah

U aint see nofin yet

The rock5555: Chai i love this, front page in the making.

Continue jare, i love horror film oo and my next story on NL is gonna be horror, so am wired bah

U aint see nofin yet

Lol. Thanks for following

CHAPTER 5
HATE 21: PEOPLE READING MY DIARY
I love my privacy. I hide my diary in a very very safe place. But somehow, evil people [yes, they are evil] find it & think it’s ok to read it. The worst part is when they are caught, they just smile at me. -_- Arghhhh!
HATE 22: PEOPLE WITH BODY ODOUR
I’ve heard some people were born with it but I don’t believe it. There are so many deodourants in the market today. Take a loooong shower & use one or stop interacting with human beings.
HATE 23: PEOPLE WITH MOUTH ODOUR
No one can face you when you talk & you still don’t think you should do something about it?? I dunno which one I hate most sef, hate 22 or hate 23. BRUSH YOUR TEETH FOR F##K’S SAKE! Even if you don’t floss or use mouthwash or visit the dentist, just brush your teeth with toothpaste. Thanks 
HATE 24: ANY “BALL” SPORT
Football, baseball, basketball, handball, etc. Yep, there are a lot of people who like them. But I don’t. And don’t force me to watch it, I’ll hate you too. LOL
HATE 25: SHAKESPEARE
*dodges stones* I know a lot of writers like Shakespeare but I don’t. Honestly, apart from Romeo & Juliet, I don’t know what else he did. Don’t even get me started on that Macbeth thing. I think it’s torture to read his works.



I’m signing out for today. Thanks to all the viewers, likers & commenters. You are all awesome. I love you like crazy! Goodnight.

Hmmm... *Following*, you seem to hate everything I hate too... Well, except the "PMS" and maybe the "ball" thing, I kinda love football . Just outta curiousity, how many chapters are left?

Nkpume Iko is here now.

Damn, this is bleeping hilarious.

PS You seem to hate a lot.At this rate, you just might hate the world in its entirety before you turn 30.

chistar01: Hmmm... *Following*, you seem to hate everything I hate too... Well, except the "PMS" and maybe the "ball" thing, I kinda love football . Just outta curiousity, how many chapters are left?

Thanks for commenting. I still don't know how many chapters I'll write, I'm just taking it one step at a time.

Nkpume Iko: Nkpume Iko is here now.

Damn, this is bleeping hilarious.

PS You seem to hate a lot.At this rate, you just might hate the world in its entirety before you turn 30.

Welcome I'm not a sadist oh, I love a lot of stuff too. LOL

You guys are awesome. I'm smiling like an id..iot now, my mum is looking at me strangely. LOL. But seriously, thanks for the comments.

CHAPTER 6
HATE 26: LONG SERMONS
That’s why I love the Catholic church even though I’m not a member. Everything has its set time. God is not a God of confusion. Don’t tell me you’ll preach for just 45 minutes & then go back on your word. Long sermons are boring, they even make me forget the lessons or in some extreme cases, I even forget the topic of the sermon. I wish I could walk out of church sometimes. I wish…
HATE 27: HUNGER
By now, you should know, I love food. I hate bad food but I even prefer it to hunger. When I’m hungry, I hate everything & everyone around me. That’s why my motto is “Give me food & a John Grisham novel & I’ll love you forever [until I’m hungry again]
HATE 28: RUNWAY CLOTHES
I don’t mean the normal ones, I mean those ones that even mad people can’t wear. What exactly are they modeling, the clothes or the models’ long legs & thin frame? The people who buy those things, where do they wear it to?? And why does it have to be crazy before we know it’s creative?
HATE 29: REAL HOUSEWIVES
I hate that show. Bunch of jobless, attention seeking, backbiting, plastic-faced sweethearts. And I have no words for those who derive joy from it. LOL
HATE 30: CATS
It’s probably the African in me speaking but don’t you guys also think cats are witches? I hate their eyes, their meow, their hair, their everything. Eww!

CHAPTER 7
HATE 31: HEAVY METAL
There’s beautiful music, there’s also ugly music. Heavy metal is ugly music IMHO. So freaking noisy. It’s just like kids playing with metallic objects. I know music is dynamic & people interpret it differently but I’ve tried & I haven’t seen anything worth liking in it. I’ll just stick to soft rock.
HATE 32: LOUSY PEOPLE
By this, I mean noisy people who can NEVER keep their mouths shut. They talk & talk & talk & talk & talk. I just tune them out & try to concentrate on something else but it takes effort, you know? In my head, all I’m thinking is “STFU!!! YOU TALK TOO MUCH!” But I’m a nice girl so I don’t say it out loud. 
HATE 33: ASUU
Of course, this has to be on the list. Why are they still on strike? I’ve reread all my favourite novels.  And they go on strike all the time, isn’t it time to try something new?
HATE 34: NIGERIAN POLITICIANS
I have no problem with them stealing [I would steal if I was in their shoes, don’t judge me] but do it moderately. And do your job first, then you can pocket the change. Nothing works in Nigeria & you’re still stealing, that’s wickedness.
HATE 35: DANCING
I love watching people dance but I don’t dance. I’m the worst dancer I know. I can’t even dance when I’m alone. Then, some people think it’s cool to force me to dance, it’s not. They force me in church, in school, at home, everywhere. Some even make it seem like it’s a crime to not dance… They make me hate dancing more.

You seems to hate alot of things. I too hate some of those things but i also disagree with you on some. Like, Nollywood movies, dont be offended they are all craps.
Football: are you serious when you said you hate anything Ball? *Disappionted*. Football is like the best entainment you can get all over the world, its my favourite.
The rest might also be annoying to me. We are cool Though

Awww I love soft/alternative rock too

miss.terious:

I know the updates are really short so I could update 3 or 4 chapters per day. And constructive criticism is very very welcome.

bia young lady, did you say constructive criticism are welcomed? Indeed! I've just three words for you...


Bring it on!!!


btw you say you're 17 and you have this much hate? By 30 you'd have an encyclopedia

princesa:
bia young lady, did you say constructive criticism are welcomed? Indeed! I've just three words for you...


Bring it on!!!


btw you say you're 17 and you have this much hate? By 30 you'd have an encyclopedia

Madam abeg take it easy on her ooh, so that she will not regret asking for criticism. I know you are a good critic.

Deiok:
Madam abeg take it easy on her ooh, so that she will not regret asking for criticism. I know you are a good critic.

nah, am not here to rant, am here to enjoy the 'hate' drama and tantrums

Deiok: You seems to hate alot of things. I too hate some of those things but i also disagree with you on some. Like, Nollywood movies, dont be offended they are all craps.
Football: are you serious when you said you hate anything Ball? *Disappionted*. Football is like the best entainment you can get all over the world, its my favourite.
The rest might also be annoying to me. We are cool Though

Aww. Well, everyone is different. BTW, I love your signature

princesa:
bia young lady, did you say constructive criticism are welcomed? Indeed! I've just three words for you...


Bring it on!!!


btw you say you're 17 and you have this much hate? By 30 you'd have an encyclopedia

Take it easy sha oh. LOL

princesa:

nah, am not here to rant, am here to enjoy the 'hate' drama and tantrums

Okay ooh.

miss.terious:

Aww. Well, everyone is different. BTW, I love your signature

You love my siggy , waooww, you are like the first person on NL to say that. Alot my peeps here dont seems to like it.
Me just like FOOD thats all

Hilarious.
Nyc going darl,bt all dese many hates sha(shrugs)
I hope afta all dese u'll write abt stuffs u love
Dat mouth odour thng,so true.I used to av a choir memba lyk dat,nd he always liked singing next to me,with d same mic,I almost died den...

Vickii Ro: Hilarious.
Nyc going darl,bt all dese many hates sha(shrugs)
I hope afta all dese u'll write abt stuffs u love
Dat mouth odour thng,so true.I used to av a choir memba lyk dat,nd he always liked singing next to me,with d same mic,I almost died den...

When are you updating your story madam?

Vickii Ro: Hilarious.
Nyc going darl,bt all dese many hates sha(shrugs)
I hope afta all dese u'll write abt stuffs u love
Dat mouth odour thng,so true.I used to av a choir memba lyk dat,nd he always liked singing next to me,with d same mic,I almost died den...

If I'm not too lazy, I'll start a new thread about "Lovers". LOL at your choir member. How did you survive?