Uduwackk no let me open this eye way i close** smoke my igho,sip from bottle of fanta no time**

Gd mnin, enjoyurday, gd mnin, Godblessu, gd mnin, Iloveu. goodmorning

01emek: we slept on thread can't believe it! we slept on thread can't believe it!

huh! *shocked* u slept on thread aswell...hmmm

Yawns.....

Waiting for d HOLY uduak

Y u dey do me stong thing na. Update before I vex o. Na ur update b ma food. M hungry o

The rock5555: Still no light. Chai nepa abeg na.

I'm beginning to loose my patience o!!!peter

Una goodmorning ooo

Tell me wat is gud abt d morning if u no knack us tory 4 here!!!ur suspence no go kill person.

I finally caught up. I've laughed, cried and stopped reading at a time to reflect on my life..
This story has been truly amazing.
Please, we await your next post.

Hmmmm

Quite sensible,maturity is setting in

I thank God that you decided to change, hope not just for a short while.

a life making mistakes is not more honorable,but more useful dan a life spent doing nothing.tnk God u change,baba i dey rock u o,oya turn up

Peter oya come update nOOooooow

waslead300: Make i hear say rock d badoo repent, part 2 shall tell... @ROCK, Me get question 4 u, dat aunty may dey call u oduwa 4 ur compound, she don delete 4 dis story because me wan hear as u bleep her and do come and update

Y u wan spoil my secret na. No worry u go hear about her soon, me and she still det unfinished business.

Part two starts early tomorow. Make una bear with me while i play my Pes.

The rock5555:
Make una bear with me while i play my Pes.

i wish i knw ur house make i come beat u because i de form today n nobody don fit beat me

Wia d update Na?

Gala!!!!!! Gimme one abeg call that La casera come .



Na here I go siddon till uduak come update

DATE: 25th DEC. 2011
Was how it all started. We just came back from church with a friend of mine, Collins the fake letter writer.

We were munching down several pieces of meat coupled with soft drinks when he brought me an unresiting job offer.

"Uduak you see that purewater over there?" He pointed at the two bags of pure water which near the crate of soft drinks.

"Ehen wetin do them? You wan drink?" I said playfully.

"Sharrap jare, you too like play. I dey work there, infact na me tie am sef" Collins said which made my ears to prick up.

"Ehhn, you tie wetin, where you dey work... Purewater ke, as you lazy reach, how the place dey?" I asked somany foolish questions, Collins was busy laughing and then he nack me a million dollar question.

"You wan work there?"

"Yesssssss" I screamed even though i did not know the type of work there.

"Oya na, i hope you sabi arrange the pure water wella and you go dey fast because no time for lazyness" collins warned.

Haba without wasting time i left my meat and ran to the bag of purewater, then loose it up, pour all on the ground and began trying to arrange it back like the second bag. It kept on falling while Collins laughed at me hysterically.

"See this learner, them no go employ you" Collins said still laughing.

"Oya tell me how the place be na?" I pleaded.

"Mehn them tile the place, see fans, if you enter sef cold go begin catch you, e just dey like A.c room, you go just balance the pack your water" Collins said which made alot of fantasies enter into my head. If the working place was like that, i wont mind working there for ever, i thought.

"So how i go take get work now?" I enquired further.

"No worry, the person wey give your mother this water, na the son of the owner of that place wey get the company" Collins said. I was glad because the man knew my mother alot and things might click.

I thanked Collins and even gave him transport money home only for him to return back with two packets of knockout.

"Collins wetin na?" I asked, i was already sitting down still trying to figure out how the pure water was arranged and tied. Collins laughed at my handwork but i was pretty determine to learn it before i go there.

"Oboy leave that thing make we go throw banga outside" Collins shouted and gave me one packet, without a second thought i joined him outside, we began terrorising little children with our knockouts.

"Hey you boys stop there" A tiny voice said behind us. We turn to see an equally short man staring at us but what he held was not small, he was holding a long hunter gun. Our eyes opened in shock. The man meant to shoot us and i have never been pointed a gun in my face before so i felt like pissing on my boxers that moment. We could not even muster courage to run cus that gun na shoot and die or so we thought.

"So na una be the armed robbers wey dey thief for this area ba?" The man accused us.

"Oga no, na banga we dey throw" We confessed, i knew the man alot, we usually fetched water in his house, the man was shorter than me with a reddish face like he was bleaching and a bald raggard hair. His children were throwing the knockout with us just a minute ago but it was only us he saw to catch. He was the only person that ever made me kneel down in public willingly one day-well that one don pass na, if he see me now, him dey fear me.

"So even you pastor pikin" He said while pointing the nozzle of the gun nearer to my nose, my heart beat increased, nobody wan die but they wan go heaven-2baba hit song was ringing in my head that moment.

"Sir i no do anything, na him give me the banga sef" Collins added more wahala on my head.

"Yes am sure, because i never see you for this area before" The man even added more misery on me. I could not even mutter a word to save myself.

"But una suppose know say police don ban this thing, what if say i just shoot una, oya never the less, wether na him give you the banga or not, all of us dey go station" The man said and grabbed Collins trousers while grabbing mine also like how Naija police do and began dragging us away.

His son came and collect his gun from his dad then smiled at us before running away.

I held my face in shame, i was in a big mess, my dad would make sure i rot there for atleast a week before he even considers bailing me. All the man's children were my juniors in school and the man could not touch them but instead he was forming James Bond with another man pikin. I felt so sad that my pure water dream would collaspe, maybe my dad would say since baptismal class did not work on me i should go to a seminary college.

Worst of it all, everyone stood on the street on the 25th of December, watching two hapless fellows being taken to the police station. We were doomed.

Well i did not care about Collins that moment, i was doomed.

But a saviour came....

---

Yawns and run to work.... Una good morning oo, who fit guess who the saviour be

Na aunty charity na.

Btw...u too lyk Banga self....una gud mawnin

Na christy na.
@rock i don finish my exams oh.

You can't stop the man maka na obago.. Nice one @rock the bangabuos banga

The rock,ur saviour na gal na. U go reward am with bleeping tinz

must u leave us hangn

Keep it rocking bro!........maturity is touching every part of ur life, even ur writing has improved greatly......*thumbs up*

All of your saviours na always females, this wan no go different.

Savior on a xmas day. Hahhaahhaa. . But neva d less who b dat savior

Na Jesus or father chrismas come save u ni ...

Spatacle-Anty Charity? Wrong answer.

Daniel-Christy? Uh uh wroing answer. Welcome back from exams bro

Mimisboygreat-thanks alot man

Spongia-na girl quiet alrite but i repent na

D.Ella.Luv-abeg no hang again, come down

AJObig-thanks man, i appreciate the encouragement

Clemzy-u are rite sir, make we see which female na

Tombilly-u go soon know the saviour

waslead-Lol @ father christmas.

Typing ..... Una try for the guesses

..........

The rock5555: ..........

Oga wetin dis 1 mean now

lekinz:

Oga wetin dis 1 mean now

lend me that ur Ak 47 i wan use am small

THE SAVIOUR

---

"uduak what happened?" My sister who came for the christmas break asked me.

I smiled but remained quiet, so as not to put myself in more trouble, until the man spoke for us.

"Am taking your brother to the police station for shooting knockouts" The man boasted.

"Haa sir please just leave him for my father, he would deal with him more than police sef" My sister pleaded and the dragged him one side before they talked in wispers.

"Oya make una dey go, i dey come see your father later" The man said and let us go. I feared the worst but i was glad that what our pleading could not solve, just a few wispers cured it. Thats the power of a woman. I did not even bid Collins goodbye again, he simply carried his legediz benz and marched away.

I sighted Lecturer coming with one fresh babe which had suddenly started coming to his place more regularly than others. I greeted her and she asked me to come collect my christmas money later, i jumped up in joy and waited for an hour before knocking on Lecturer's door.

"Ow you don come now now Oya take dey go" She said to my excitment.

She gave to me an envelope which was large, i thanked her double times and ran to show my siblings, they were all jubilating and asked me to open it so we can share.

I agreed and opened it, immediatly all our faces spoiled. It was filled with N5 notes, i painfully counted it only to see that it was N250, so we were to take N50 each, upon all the thank you and blessing i dashed her. We began cursing her immediatly.

When my parents came back, i informed them of the latest development, my mum was happy for me while my dad saw it as finally i came to my senses, he was busy nacking different stories of people who did something good with their lives while i was busy galvanising round Akwanga town visiting friends

i yawned till he was through with his boring lectures. And then my mother called the Owner of he company she used her influence to Convince him to agree to what she said. He said he was away with his family in the village for Christmas break so i should resume in January.

I was glad and forgot about the N50 which we were dashed each, i sat down to watch a carol being televised when my dad walked into his room to rest. That moment someone knocked so i rushed to go open it only to come face to face with the man that caught us throwing knockouts.

"Where your father?" The man shouted.

"Ehhmm mmm, ahhh" I starmered but he just pushed me away and braged in.

I was in deep sh'it or so i thought..

---

15th FEBRUARY 2012.
I was billed to finally start work, i was scared to go that Janaury so i stayed at home still practicing my water tying skills till my mom threatened me before i finally gave in and went to work.

Collins recieved me well and introduced me to the workers around, it was time for work so i dropped the foodflask that my mum gave to me from house. Since i have never gone there before i had to grab my lunch incase of any hunger related issues, i was not called Man Must Wack for nothing.

Everything was according to what Collins said, the tiles, fans, arena, it was so beautiful that i could lie on the floor. I could not help admiring the Machines and the purewater like it was the first time i was seeing them.

I thought i had hit jackpot in money making but that day i understood the saying that nothing good comes easy. That day i experienced the most longest day since i was born.

---

Chai make i go tweet small and maybe begin to visit Linda Ikeji again, no be only that oblong head Bonario go win her $100. And i been dey comment for there wella oo, only for Nairaland to come hijack my Number one gossip and news site, joined with sexuality section, mehn i had to migrate...

goodnite....